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Social Media and Self Esteem

Intense Mesocycle Week 1 Day 1: Today’s skwoots for the sloots brought to you by Poor Eating and Sore Left Shoulder/Trap. Sponsored by Smolov. 3x52.5 - 4x62.5 - 3x4x70 - 5x70. Performance today was lacking (probably cause I ate crap Friday/Saturday lololol), my knees caved in on almost every rep and and my set up was nowhere near as tight as I would’ve liked. I blame the latter on me pulling my shoulder this morning and a strange tightness/pain in my left upper trap. Sorry for the gratuitous crotch shots, I don’t know how to film inconspicuously without looking like a dickhead in the gym 😅. #girlswholift#powerlifting#smolov#fitness#squats#underarmour

A video posted by ビビアン🎈 (@tacoviv) on Apr 12, 2015 at 12:14am PDT

For a long time I have been thinking of writing down my thoughts as I take part in this fitness journey and I suppose this will mark my first post! 

I am not someone who lies to myself to make myself feel better, I enjoy transparency in all things. So I will be the first to admit: I am addicted to social media. Now there can be good things and bad things that come with this. I use Instagram mostly to look for fitness inspiration (and drool over food posts lol) but in doing that I tend to bash my own self esteem. I’m someone who has struggled with self esteem, anxiety depression and to feel so put down when I’m looking for inspiration to change is bittersweet. 

Now don’t get me wrong some (all) of the women/girls on Instagram are FABULOUS, I like that there’s a STRONG IS THE NEW SKINNY mentality out there replacing NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS SKINNY but then I look at myself and I compare: “Why can’t I lift as much” “Why can’t I be as strong” “Why can’t I be as lean” “I’m so fat”. But I need to remember, and I think this is something that applies to EVERYONE (girls, boys, men & women) that these Instagram/Facebook/Tumblr posts are highlights of people’s lives. They are packaged, processed, filtered, edited and perfectly gift wrapped before being posted. You are your own harshest critic and while self deprecation may work for some people in terms of motivation, but I think we need to ease up and remember that progress takes time and effort. Eating better and exercising is not about changing your body its also about changing your mind and your daily life process. You need to WANT to change and committing your mind, body and soul is a start. While social media might help kickstart and inspire the need to change, change starts from within and often changing the way you think will probably be the hardest journey you’ll take. 

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hair is way too cute

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I had a nerdy Sailor Moon wedding like a fancy ass grown up and lived to tell the tale. Entire blog post including DIY tutorials and background up at Defective Geeks! IT TOOK ME ONE BILLION YEARS TO WRITE so I hope someone out there reads it haha.

http://www.defectivegeeks.com/2014/12/18/sailormoonwedding/

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lines shapes forms 3290

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Spaghetti for a little friend.

minor-catastrophe:

I FOUND IT. I FOUND MY FAVORITE POST IN THE WHOLE WORLD

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this is the most important gif on the INTERNET

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I avoid people a lot.

Not because I don’t like them (well, some) but because I have a very difficult time socializing… and it hurts people sometimes and I can come across as rude or selfish. It takes time for me to build up the energy and to push past the anxiety when I need to get something...

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Cutest Mouseketeer ever!

http://bit.ly/1bSMeXz from Batpig & Me http://on.fb.me/TXM2tT

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Brimfield PD (Ohio) - This is the new puppy at training today….we don’t think the bullet proof vest fits….just yet

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