bygonemoderngods - Tumblr blog

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dragon, but make them domestic

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sae.film

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Look, maybe this a dumb question, but I figure it's worth asking... the Old Man's been knocking at my door asking to be let in. But to be totally honest - I'm intimidated by him. I'm worried that whatever tasks or tests he has in store for me, I won't be strong enough for. I'm not a "warrior", so to speak. All my life I've been small and weak. What others perceive as breezes feel like storms to me. Why on earth would he want to work with me?

Sorry this has taken so long to get to. First - there are no dumb questions. There are only questions which need refining. The way we do that is to ask, and to reflect. Then, after reflection, we ask some more. “Would you know yet more, or what?”Second, have you read this post of mine on Heathen Warriors?  I get ranty, because I’m a bloody cripple, and I ended up with a certain someone on my case. Why would he want a cripple? Why would a god like that want anything to do with a broken thing like me?

Why indeed? I still don’t rightly know. But I do what I do, and it seems to benefit others, and he’s always there, standing in the corner, or a presence behind my back. So I’m a crippled Odinsman, and that’s all there is to say.Except your ask wasn’t about me, was it? It was about you.  About your fears that you won’t be strong enough. That you’ll fail whatever ‘tests’ might be in store.

So…well…oh…how to put it…(Sowilo - see what I did there?)The thing with tests, right? The thing with tests is that school says they’re pass/fail.  But school isn’t all there is. Sure, there are moments of choice where you do one thing and it means possibility collapses. Sure there are tests where if you do or say one thing, you can’t do another.

But tests, real ones? They aren’t pass/fail. They’re see-what-happens-under-these-conditions.  They’re see how sharp this blade is, how hot is this tea, how this person handles a given situation.

Testing is iterative. Set up a situation, run the tests, gather the data, tweak and redesign that which is tested in light of data, test again. Repeat. No pass/fail. Only data, only knowledge. Only learning. Only refining. Only discovering.

“Would you know more, or what?”The Old Man can be a terrifying bugger, no doubt. It’s well attested in his names and lore. He’s a mad bastard. Mad enough to hang himself from a tree, to starve and wound himself, to sacrifice himself, all for the Knowing of it,He ripped out his eye to drink from the well of Mimir.Not for battle, not for war, no. This god of storm and fury, of breath and poetry and song did it for wisdom. The leader of the dead, the summoner of souls, the endless rider, the eternal wanderer?He wants to know. And if he’s knocking on your door, he wants to know you. For some reason, he’s gathered himself to come and greet you, to be the stranger on your doorstep.And maybe he’s just passing, or maybe there’s some deeper meaning. I don’t know. It’s up to you if you let him in, as it were.You say you’re weak. You say a breeze feels like a storm. So be it, it is what it is. But understand that this old god values subtlety, sensitivity, as much as brute force. If a breeze is as a storm, what of the breath of a god? What secrets might your sensitivity show you? What paths might it open?Remember - question, reflect, question. Begin, test, refine, test again.

There’s this thing called an OODA Loop, developed by the US Military:Observe, Orient, Decide, Act. But that’s a codification of something both magicians and warriors have known forever. The cycle, the rhythm, the way fore leads back, and back leads fore.

The approach favours agility over raw power. This is why guerilla warfare and small special forces teams are so effective. But what happens when you are at your ultimate weakness, when it reaches its most terrifying extent?

What happens when you’re tied to a tree, bleeding out, starved, dehydrated? What happens when you can do nothing at all.

He’s been there, you know. He’s been at death’s door, and maybe beyond. What happens when the Orient bit of that loop is just your death, and you are powerless, to Decide or Act?

He knows. It’s what gave him the runes.It’s what magic is. The ultimate agility. The ability to move-without-moving, both yourself and the universe at large.Do not fear being weak in the face of Odin. Weakness, the lack of of options? By these, he gained mastery.You are what you are. But, if you let him, he will show you what you may become.

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"Now, the early gods of writing, the scribe gods: gods like Odin or Thoth, or Hermes. These are also the gods of magic. And I don't believe that that is entirely a coincidence. That in my estimation, writing and magic are practically the same thing.

So, I would like to think that the current generation of aspiring writers will not sell themselves short in this. That you should never think of yourself as purely an entertainer for hire who is lucky to have the work.

You should try to remember the tradition that you are becoming part of. You should try to remember that a writer can change the world with their writing. Think of the books that have completely changed human history and see yourself in that light.

Because if you are a writer, then the substances that you are handling the things that you are juggling- you are having an effect upon human history and the entirety of the human future."

-Alan Moore

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Honoring a God is very deeply transformative. Even when you’re not actively “working” with them, even when you’re simply taking in their essence and making an offering here and there! My advice to someone who wants to learn about a deity is to learn from this deity. What can they teach you, as a mythological and divine figure? What are the positive changes that came to be since you’ve started venerating them? Notice these changes and let yourself learn and be guided by the deities you love!

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I wonder what conversations they had in that cave.

I wonder if when Sigyn's arms shook and burned, when stinging sweat dripped into her eyes, if Loki sung her stories and spun her winding jokes to make her laugh.

I wonder if she sang back to him as she had to remove the bowl to empty it, if she reminded him of fields of flowers and the sun on their skin, of days without pain, and soothed him through the worst of his trembling.

I wonder if they cried together, if Loki couldn't help wrapping his fingers around his bindings, getting as close to his child as he could. I wonder if they spent hours, silent, sitting together in their grief.

I wonder if they laughed together, if they reminisced in the past and planned for the future, if they knew that this would not be forever.

I wonder if they processed anger together, if they softened together, so they knew that one day in the far future, they would be able to forgive if not forget.

idk i just wonder about them a lot

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Afternoon offering to Loki. Sponge cake, fresh strawberries and whipped cream.

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Nice

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Remember, remember, the fifth of September…

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James Kozlik - Fire Storm, 2024 - Oil on board

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The gods don't always show you they're with you in big ways.

Sometimes it's small things, a butterfly hovering around you, a wild animal coming to you for help, hitting every green light when you're running late, an extra dollar in your pocket when you need it.

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v

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Trees that have been struck by lightning

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