bytemee

[bytemee]

OPERA HOUSE 2 (continued) — yu jimin.

♫ playing… opera house by cigarettes after sex

synopsis. you moved to seoul for school, with barely enough money to cover your rent, a language you were still learning clumsy and slow, and your little sister back home constantly asking you to look out for her favorite idols, as if they’d just show up next to you at a crosswalk.

you weren’t here to chase anything. not fame, not love, not even a dream, really but just something to make it through.

but she found you anyway, and in her mind, without meaning to, she started building something quiet and vast just for you — like an opera house tucked deep in a place no one else could reach, a place no one else would ever know how to find, and she still doesn’t understand why or how or what it was supposed to mean, only that she was meant to love you, and even now, even after everything, she still does.

pairing. idol!karina x collegestudent!fem!reader

genre. romance, slow burn, angst / hurt-comfort, emotional drama.

disclaimer(s). unresolved trauma, ANGST bruh, fluffy too heh, kissing, L translated korean (not a lot dont fear), lot of timeskips, karina wants that cookie so bad dude...and let me know if there's more!

final part guys sorry for the three split 💔

word count. 8.3k

main masterlist. part one. part two.

you start seeing her name in your notifications a little more often, even more often than before, if that was possible. and as the weeks passed, it became normal, somehow. like you were meant to be right here, side by side, making her laugh through the phone, whispering jokes to her under the sheets.

so much so that it feels weird not seeing her number pop up.

a photo of her lunch captioned: "bet u eat like a child"

a voice memo where she tries to sing a song she got stuck in her head and then begins giggling halfwaythrough because she thinks it's embarrassing.

a random fact:

did you know that sea turtles have no teeth?

you didn't. but it was still nice to know.

it's cute how excited she is to share the most trivial details, the things no one else would think twice about. even cuter was how you knew her, all the different parts. you learned a lot, after those months, and they were all quiet discoveries:

her favorite color is blue. she hates coffee. she likes chocolate ice cream. she sings when she brushes her teeth. she always wears the bracelet you fixed the first time you met, no matter where she goes or what the outfit is. she never checks the news but loves listening to old rock bands.

but maybe the most interesting thing you learn about her is

the reason her laugh was always so bright and beautiful wasn't because she had practiced it. it was just who she was. you only wish she saw herself the way you do.

you still have other things going on. group projects, late shifts, laundry, and cramming formulas into your brain for the upcoming midterm. you meet jae for coffee one morning because he complained you've been neglecting him for too long. vivian makes you facetime her because she misses your face. your mother calls again. but still nothing from your dad.

you're there (over the phone) when livi unboxes her new computer. you send her a picture of you smiling, then a shocked face, to which she replies, "ew."

you buy her a coffee. she sends back a sticker of a cat vomiting. you tell her to be grateful.

vivian begs you to help her thrift a look for a '90s-themed party she got dragged into. sora picks up a few night shifts at the bookstore and keeps coming home with niche self-help books that she insists you all read together.

life feels full. almost overflowing, in a way, and it's hard to believe you started this year not sure if you could afford the rent, the gas, the food. but, somehow, it's happening. you're making it happen.

vivan, jae, sora

vivian:

uh oh

it's tuesday

you failed another math quiz didn't you y/n

you:

i didn't fail...

i just didn't pass

jae:

rip

you:

stfu

sora:

hey.

you:

sorry

vivian:

do you guys wanna go get bbq

sora:

omgggg yesss

jae:

yess.

you:

im studying.

vivian:

boring ://

sora:

im sure u can study later

vivian:

can you spare an hour or so???

jae:

she literally failed.

sora:

studying isn't going anywhere.

vivian:

its better late then never tho

you:

im locked in guys. im sorry.

jae:

top 10 worst anime betrayals

you groan and turn your phone face down. you weren't paying all this money to fail.

your phone buzzes.

karina:

i thought you said you'd call me after 8

karina:

but it's already 9

:(

your lips twitch.

you:

well technically 9 is after 8

karina:

(¬_¬")

she's cute.

you feel yourself soften, a familiar warmth spreading inside your chest, and without thinking, you dial her number. you don't even get through the first ring before she picks up.

"hi." her voice is soft, like she was waiting.

you smile, just a little. "hi."

there's a rustling sound on the other end; it sounds like wind. you picture her outside, hair probably tied back, phone pressed to her ear, with one hand shoved into her jacket pocket. "i didn't forget," you say, leaning back in your chair. "i've just been trying to get through this math set."

"mhm." she sounds unconvinced. "did you actually study, or did you just glare at the worksheet for two hours and pretend to absorb it through osmosis?"

"...maybe both."

"thought so."

you run a hand over your face and sigh. "i don't get it. it's like the more i try to cram in, the less i remember. i keep doing this thing where i look at the answer key and then try to reverse-engineer the problem, but that only works for, like... half a second. i'm gonna flunk the final."

she pauses. you hear the wind again, a car door slamming. "...are you outside?" you ask, blinking.

"maybe."

you sit up. "wait. like outside-outside?"

a beat. then, so casually, it makes you freeze: "can you let me in?"

you blink. "what?"

"what?" she echoes, voice light. "i was in the neighborhood."

you push away from your desk, startled, almost knocking over your water bottle. "are you serious—wait, seriously?"

"why would i lie about being outside your house? c'mon, i brought food. let me in before it gets cold."

you scramble up and head toward the door, heart picking up a little, palms suddenly a bit clammy. you can't help it. it's been two and a half weeks since the party. and ever since, all you've done is talk and text and learn everything except how it feels to have her skin under your fingertips and her voice close enough to make your toes curl.

you open the door to the sight of her standing there with a paper bag cradled in her arms and a book tucked under one elbow.

you stare.

she raises a brow. "are you gonna make me stand here in the cold, or—?"

you step back without a word, and she brushes past you. she's in jeans and a simple sweater, hair pulled back. it looks like she came straight from practice, or an interview, or something.

it smells like spring.

you realize, belatedly, that you should probably shut the door. you reach back and lock it. turn around.

"what are you doing here?" you blurt.

she smiles, lifting the bag. "feeding you," she says matter-of-factly, her expression turning mischievous. "unless you already ate? in which case, i'm a fool—"

"no, no." you take a few steps forward. "um, it's fine. i'm—not. eaten."

"okay, good.' cause i didn't, either. so we can eat together."

she kicks off her shoes before walking the familiar path toward your bedroom, setting the food on your desk before eyeing your notes.

you glare. "don't start."

"i'm just saying," she says, dropping her book onto your bed. "it's good that you're trying, but this is actual nonsense. you circled the same number twice and wrote 'why' under it."

you shove the notes aside. "okay, maybe i'm floundering a little."

she smiles—a small, private one—and reaches into the bag. "eat first. you look like you need the fuel, and it'll give you some energy."

"i'm energized."

"you are not. sit."

you do, because when she uses that tone—light but certain—you kind of always do.

she hands you a pair of chopsticks and sits across from you, tucking one leg under the other. for a few minutes, you just eat. the noodles are decent. nothing fancy, just a hole-in-the-wall place down the street, and definitely not the type of food you'd usually share. but the taste is comforting somehow, a familiar mix of garlic and pork.

karina doesn't say anything while you eat, and for a while, the silence is peaceful, almost comforting. it's hard to remember a time when the quiet between the two of you felt heavy, or forced, or unsure.

"thanks," you say eventually. "for coming."

she shrugs. "felt like seeing you."

you nod, swallowing another bite. "i wasn't sure when that would happen."

she pauses.

"you think about things too much, y/n."

she lifts a piece of chicken and blows on it lightly, waiting.

you're not sure what to say. it's not as if the thought hadn't crossed your mind. how you both danced around it for the past few weeks. her being busy, her group getting new schedules, you dealing with work.

there were days when you wondered if she was having second thoughts or if something happened, or even if you made things awkward or weird.

"sometimes," she adds quietly, like she can sense the way you're spiraling. "i forget we live in the same city."

your laugh comes out shaky. "we're both pretty busy people."

she takes a bite. chews. swallows. "mm," she hums. then: "that doesn't mean i don't want to see you." she looks up, and her eyes are dark and sincere.

you exhale slowly, trying to ignore the rush of warmth, and nod. "okay."

karina chews. swallows. brings her bowl closer. "how have you been?"

you lift a shoulder. "okay. school is kicking my ass. sora keeps finding me books, so."

"any more life-changing ones?"

"nope, just self-help. they all sound like they were written by the same person."

"but useful?"

you make a face. "if you consider self-help useful."

"which i do, for the most part. some of those things aren't always obvious. sometimes they're not easy, either."

her voice trails off, her gaze falling down again.

"hm," is all you say before you lean in slightly, tilting your head. "what's that book?"

she looks confused and then looks at where you point.

"oh. this?" she sets her bowl down. picks up the thick book beside her; it looks fresh, brand new almost. "i've been practicing it too," she says, tapping the cover with her finger.

"it's a math book," she adds, "i wanted to help you study."

you blink. "you study... math. in your spare time... because of me? why?"

"because you said you were bad at it."

"i didn't—" you pause. "well, yeah, i did, but..."

"so here's the plan. we can practice the chapters, and you'll get better. and then you'll ace your final and not have to retake the class. win-win, right?"

you hesitate. "karina, that's not—this is the rest of your day, not to mention your week—"

she rolls her eyes. "y/n," she murmurs, running a fingertip over the spine of the book, looking amused.

"what?"

"i want to."

your mouth snaps shut. "okay," you manage to say.

"okay," she echoes.

for a moment, the two of you stare at each other.

then she cracks a smile. small, a little smug. "you're kind of cute when you short-circuit."

you groan, covering your face with one hand. "don't say that."

"i'm serious," she teases, nudging your leg with hers under the table. "all flustered and grateful."

"i'm not flustered."

"you're definitely grateful, though."

that makes you glance up. she's grinning now, chopsticks dangling loosely in her hand, hair a little messy. you set your bowl aside and leave your spot on the bed to sit at your desk. "so what, you're my tutor now?"

"sure," she says. "honorary tutor-slash-moral support-slash-food delivery. add that to my resume."

you stifle a smile. "you're going to regret this."

"no, i won't." she gives you a look.

you get through two questions, both wrong, and you swear under your breath, about to scribble them out, but karina's already standing.

she comes over quietly, reaching past you to point something out on the paper, her necklace swinging forward, her hair brushing your shoulder like a whisper. "okay, wait," she says, kneeling beside your chair, eyes narrowing at the problem.

"try walking me through it. just say what you're thinking." you hesitate mostly because you're not sure if you're thinking anything at all—but she waits patiently, tilting her head a little, close enough that her knee bumps yours. and so, slowly, you try again. she doesn't interrupt.

she's always been a good listener, anyway, which makes this whole thing feel a lot easier.

and when you finally get one right—one stupid, simple problem that's been tripping you up all week—karina turns to you with a grin like you just solved world hunger and leans in to press a kiss into the corner of your mouth without warning.

"that was real tutor behavior," she says. "ten points to you."

"you didn't say there'd be kisses involved," you mutter, flustered, but not pulling away.

she shrugs like it's nothing. "it's how i motivate my students."

another half-hour passes like that, the math problems growing more complicated, her instructions more thorough, and your professors lectures being the missing puzzle piece to make them click.

at some point she huffs, clearly bored of hovering over your shoulder, and without much warning, she plops herself down into your lap.

you go still, pencil frozen in midair, and karina just smirks, arms looping lazily around your neck as she leans into you, peering down at the next problem. "relax," she murmurs, adjusting her weight slightly, your heartbeat now obnoxiously loud in your ears.

there was no way in hell you were gonna be able to relax.

"you're ridiculous," you say, voice too thin to carry any real bite, and she hums innocently, fingers tracing aimless circles on your back while you try—and fail—to solve the equation in front of you.

when the numbers start blurring together, you groan and push the worksheet aside, and karina makes a noise of protest.

"i can't." you lean back. "it's over. the universe has decided."

she sighs, exaggerated and dramatic, like she's disappointed in you—but there's a smile tugging at her lips, betraying the fact that she's not really upset at all. "you barely lasted thirty minutes," she teases, poking you.

"i lasted longer than i thought i would," you mutter, your hands settling instinctively on her hips, keeping her close.

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"you're distracting. in a good way," you add, smiling faintly. "but still... a distraction."

"how can someone studying math be distracting?"

"you're literally sitting in my lap right now, and yet, here we are."

her nose crinkles. "touché," she whispers, glancing at the textbook and then back at you. her thumb brushes along your jaw, featherlight, her touch lingering, and the air shifts, softens.

she smells like lavender, or something warm and sweet, and your brain feels sluggish, too focused on the way she looks.

she seems to notice your stare.

"what's wrong?"

"nothing."

you lift a hand, brushing the pad of your thumb lightly over her cheek, watching the color rise under your touch, her eyelashes dipping low, a question in her expression.

"can i?" you murmur.

a quiet beat. then she nods.

you brush her bangs back, a gentle, sweeping touch that makes her exhale, eyes fluttering shut. when they open, her gaze is heavy.

"hi," you say softly.

the smile she gives you is the softest thing.

"hi."

you lean in and catch her mouth. she lets out a little breath, her hands finding your shoulders, and her grip tightens when you slide your tongue past her teeth, slow, achingly careful.

her hair spills forward, framing her face. her hands are trembling, sliding from your collarbones down, then up, until they frame the sides of your neck. you part, breathe, and then find each other again, the kiss deeper and hotter this time, almost dizzying.

your head spins, and you feel her melt, a rush of warmth that sends a jolt straight to your spine. you let your hand travel, slow and tentative, drifting over the curve of her waist before dipping beneath the hem of her sweater.

"y/n," she murmurs after the fifth or sixth kiss, and you hum a reply, sliding a hand down her spine and making her shudder.

"yeah?"

you hear her swallow, feel the tremble of her ribcage, and the frantic pace of her heartbeat.

"i like being in your presence," she says, words ghosting over the edge of your lips.

your throat goes dry. "mm. is that all?"

"i think about you all the time," she adds quietly, like she can hardly bring herself to say it. "i miss you when we're apart. even when i'm not aware."

the heat that crawls up the back of your neck has nothing to do with embarrassment.

you look down.

she takes a slow inhale.

"so yeah," she continues, a hint of humor in her voice. "it's kind of annoying, actually. i like all of you—even the you that's horrible at math."

you let out a dry laugh, switching to english with your accent thick in your next words, more noticeable when you're caught off guard. "that's real cute comin' from someone who hasn't touched a calculator since high school."

"oh my god," she breathes, and then she's laughing for real, head falling against your shoulder. "you're lucky i like your accent."

you switch back to korean, a childlike grin on your face. "that's crazy. no one likes my accent."

"well, i do."

she smiles, and her dimple appears. you don't resist the urge to trace it with the tip of your index finger.

"good," you say.

⭑𓂃

karina, somewhere far away in the haze of a comeback prep she's too tired to process, thinks about the opera house.

not a literal one. it's this image that keeps coming to her when her eyes close during the five-minute breaks between dance practices or when the vocal booth grows quiet and nobody realizes she's still standing in there, headphones limp around her neck.

a tall, aching structure. white stone. aged wood. wrapped in vines, dripping in green. built deep in the jungle. far, far away from lights and lenses. somewhere no one else would go unless she led them there.

in her head, she imagines the performance meant for only one person. an entire orchestra hidden in the trees. every note, every high note, every breath—it would be for you.

because that's what you do to her. make her want to build beautiful, impossible things in the middle of nowhere.

just to prove she means it.

just to show she loves you.

but lately, she hasn't seen you. or maybe she has, but not in the same way or for the right amount of time. she's never really seen you spiral before. you always seem to have everything together, and the rare moment you don't, you push through it to the point it looks as though it was just a blip on the radar.

she knew the first semester would be hard; the workload was not a walk in the park, and the expectations were different than anything either of you had dealt with before. but she also knows you well enough by now that she recognizes the way your mouth thins when something doesn't come easy and the tension you get in your shoulders when you're not satisfied.

and in your head it starts off small. a call from home, livi asking for money because apparently the monthly stipend mom gives isn't enough. and even though it stings, even though the bank app gives you a long pause, you say yes.

you don't tell anyone, not even livi, that the cost ate through most of what you'd put aside for tuition. that it was supposed to cover january's payments.

you tell yourself you'll figure it out later. but you stop eating out with your roommates. you cut a few corners where you can. the coffee cart becomes a staple. your favorite foods slowly disappear. you're quieter in the group chat. you leave your room less.

vivian notices first. she offers you part of her sandwich after class. you shake your head.

jae stops calling you annoying. that's how you know it's bad.

sora finds you in the library. says she got extra free tickets for the aquarium. wants to know if you'll come with.

you shake your head. tell her the usual: work, midterm, stress.

she leaves a book. "what's this?"

"meditation for dummies. don't give me that look. just read the introduction."

"are you implying i'm a dummy?"

she smiles, soft, knowing. "of course not. just... consider it, okay? i promise you'll like it."

you nod, swallowing.

she's a good friend.

karina hasn't texted in two days, and you don't blame her. you've been dry. too distant for a girlfriend. you didn't mean to be; it just happened.

the last thing you sent her was a thumbs-up. you hate yourself for it.

but she's been busy. so have you. so has everyone. it just feels like there aren't enough hours in a day anymore and the ones you do have are spent thinking about the debt building up or the assignments you should probably start or the rent bill or—

karina's sitting on the floor of the practice room with her hair tied up and shoes kicked off when livi calls her.

it wasn't unusual. the two actually spoke.

sometimes about you, sometimes not.

the call starts off casual. karina asks her about school, about the dance team, about her new favorite drama and what the characters are like, and what sort of books she's reading these days. livi responds easily, talking about the boy she likes and the dumb stuff they pull to catch each other's attention.

but then her voice drops, quieter, hesitant, almost, and it's such a sharp change in tone, such a drastic contrast, that karina knows something's wrong.

"jimin."

"hm."

"you've talked to her recently, yeah? is everything okay? she sounds..."

her voice trails off, her next words carefully picked.

"...busy."

there's a beat. a sigh, then: "i'm not sure."

"did she mention anything? y'know, like, a rough day, or—"

karina swallows, and the silence is too long. "not... really. i'm sure it's fine," she murmurs, not sounding sure at all.

"hm," is all livi says, and the conversation changes topic.

karina spends the next hour wondering why her stomach is twisted, why her hands are a little clammy, and why her chest is a bit heavy.

then, it hits her:

fear.

it was fear, and it was irrational and stupid and unhelpful, but the truth is, karina hadn't spoken to you since yesterday.

well, technically. you both had. she called. you picked up. then, you were quick. rushed. almost tense.

and she hated how fast the whole conversation was, the distance, and the strange coldness to it, and so, after you hung up, she sat down in the studio and started staring at the wall and wishing she could rewind time, somehow, back to a moment when things were easy and she hadn't ruined everything yet.

the next morning, karina's summoned into a company meeting, walking out wishing she hadn't shown up at all.

the conversation was so rehearsed to the point her manager didn't even meet her eyes.

karina doesn't react. she simply nods, letting her ears ring, feeling the words wash over her and sink into her skin.

they explain, clearly, with the least amount of emotion that they can muster.

she wants to ask, how long? or is it forever? should she even get her hopes up?

but she knows the answers and doesn't ask.

they end the meeting and leave without a word.

a minute passes. then two.

when the door clicks shut, karina's lips twitch. she feels a laugh bubbling up, hysterical and disbelieving, and she bites the inside of her cheek until it hurts, her face going blank and her body turning numb.

she doesn't text you. she doesn't trust herself not to say something too raw.

you don't text her. don't even tell her you're going home for christmas. in some ways, maybe you were trying to spare her from your... drought or whatever, and in other ways, maybe you just didn't face whatever's happening between the two of you.

the air feels colder inside your childhood house than it does outside. your parents speak like strangers, and your sister doesn't make a single noise, which is worse than any argument, any slammed door, any raised voices.

livi's curled up in the armchair with a blanket pulled to her chin, her eyes on the tv but not really watching. an old christmas movie plays in the background. mom sits by the fireplace, flipping through an issue of her latest obsession—an art magazine—and dad is making a cup of coffee, his movements mechanical.

the clock ticks. no one looks at each other.

"when are we going to open presents?"

livi finally speaks up. her eyes flicker toward yours, and you realize this is the first thing she's said directly to you all morning.

dad sets his mug on the counter. "i'm not sure."

mom frowns. "we're supposed to wait."

livi shoots her a look. "wait for who, the queen?"

"livia," your mom sighs, the same way she always does. "please."

livi's silent again.

"maybe we can do it later," your dad says, after a long, tense pause.

mom doesn't seem happy about it, but she doesn't fight, and livi seems to be satisfied enough, so the silence resumes, and you feel like you could die.

later, as you walk upstairs, someone's hand wraps around your wrist. you turn. livi.

"can we talk?"

"is this an intervention, or—?"

she gives you a flat stare. "very funny," she mutters, before walking into her room and expecting you to follow.

you hesitate, before shutting the door behind you, a bit nervously.

she's still for a few moments. the wind howls. and then she's spinning on her heel, looking right at you, her jaw clenched.

"what's wrong?" she demands.

"i could ask you the same thing."

"something's bothering you. tell me."

"it's not a big deal."

"don't."

your expression tightens. "livi," you mutter.

"this is exactly what you did last time," she continues, her voice hard. "last year. i saw how sad you were, how distant you were. like something was eating away at you, and no matter how much i asked, or tried to get close to you, or call you it wasn't enough. i saw it. i didn't understand. but now you're doing the same thing."

you swallow, not responding.

"you've been quiet and... distant. ever since you got here, you've barely looked at anyone, not even me, and it's the same. i can tell."

you stare down at the floor, jaw working. "i'm okay," you say, softly, weakly.

"tell me why. now. is it the money? mom and dad's marriage?"

"no."

"then what."

you take a slow, deep inhale.

"if you're not ready or scared, i'll wait until you are," livi adds, voice a bit quieter. "just..."

she trails off, a frown pulling at her lips.

"whatever it is, i want to help. i know you want to be the strong one. always. and you are. for me. for your friends. but not for yourself."

you breathe, closing your eyes, and after a beat, you murmur, "when did you get so smart?"

livi doesn't smile. just crosses the space between you, arms wrapping around your middle, a gentle, warm touch. you exhale and hold her.

"i've always been smart, jerk. you're the one that was distracted."

you rest your cheek against the top of her head and whisper, "i'm sorry."

later, in the kitchen, your mom wipes the counter with too much effort. she's been moving things around that don't need to be moved, cleaning already clean surfaces.

"i'm making the roast tomorrow," she says, almost to herself. "the one your dad likes."

you lean against the doorway, arms crossed. "he won't eat it anyway."

she glances at you, sharp. "don't start."

you shrug. "just saying."

she sighs through her nose. "you could help, you know. do something while you're here instead of sulking."

"i've been home twelve hours."

"and already with the attitude."

you grit your teeth. "i'm not trying to fight."

"could've fooled me."

the silence after that is cold. she opens the fridge just to stare inside, not grabbing anything.

she speaks again, quieter. "you know, you used to be different when you came home."

you furrow your brow. "when?"

"before." her voice thins. "you used to smile more. you were easier."

you blink, caught off guard. "easier?"

she shrugs. "to talk to. to understand."

your stomach turns. "i haven't changed, mom. i grew up. people do that, y'know. grow up. get older. that's normal."

her mouth presses into a line.

"is that what you're calling it?" she asks, voice careful. "growing up?"

you don't answer. you don't need to.

she scoffs, just once. then she reaches for a wine glass and pours herself half a cup like it's a reflex.

your voice sounds smaller. more vulnerable.

"mom, can you not? today."

"hm?"

"you know, can't we not talk about me growing up, or whatever, or—"

"it's not easy for us either."

she cuts in. sharp.

"we don't have any answers. we're not perfect parents. it's hard and scary, and you have no idea how frustrating it can be."

"that's not fair," you manage to say. "i'm not a parent, but i'm not a kid anymore either. you can't expect me to pretend everything is fine. because it's not, okay, and maybe the holidays are hard, but that's not my fault. i never said it wasn't. it doesn't mean we have to drink through it every year."

her gaze flashes. "what a stupid thing to say."

you don't argue.

"we're trying, y/n. you should know better than anyone."

you look down at the table. your words sound thick and shaky.

"i do know."

"do you?"

she waits, and when you don't speak, she goes still.

"oh," she murmurs. "i see."

"it's not the same."

"because you've found better people."

"they're not—no, mom, i didn't—"

"it's not an accusation, sweetheart."

you stare at each other, and the air is strange, thick, almost, and neither of you knows what to say. there's a long pause. the fridge hums behind her, the dishwasher ticks in the background, and for once, the house feels loud in the wrong places.

your mother clears her throat. "well," she says. "dinner's at five."

you nod. it's automatic.

she leaves the glass of wine on the counter and disappears down the hallway. a door clicks shut.

and that's that.

you don't cry. you don't yell. you don't slam anything.

you just sit there for a while, hunched at the kitchen table with your hands clasped tight and your jaw locked. you listen to the faint sound of livi's movie still playing, the muffled voices of people pretending to fall in love under fake snow.

eventually, you go upstairs. you pack quietly. fold your things carefully. the morning is quiet when you leave, and no one says goodbye.

⭑𓂃

the flight was long, and by the time you make it back to the apartment, you can hardly stand upright because you're so tired, your vision fuzzy.

jae looks shocked when he finds you standing in the doorway. he blinks twice, then three times, as if not believing you.

"y/n? are you a hallucination?"

"what are you talking about? i was gone for two days."

he narrows his eyes. "didn't think you were coming back," he says, but his expression is lighter now. he glances at your suitcase, then back at your face. "what happened? family emergency?"

you shrug. "something like that."

"was the roast that good?"

you give him a look. he just smirks.

"seriously," jae says, shifting. "are you alright? you were... weird before you left."

you pause. look down. then, very slowly, you nod.

"yeah," you whisper, and he must believe you, or maybe he doesn't, but either way, he's smiling. you give him a closed-mouth smile and duck into your room, and when the door closes behind you, you sag against it, exhaling.

you open her contact. you don't let yourself overthink it this time. you press the call button, and it rings. once. twice.

she answers on the third.

"y/n?"

her voice is quiet, a little hoarse. you wonder if she was asleep. or avoiding you.

you clear your throat. "are you busy?"

a pause.

"no."

you swallow. "can you come over?"

another pause. longer this time.

"i'll be there in twenty."

she doesn't even change out of her sweatpants. doesn't brush her hair. she just grabs a coat—one that still smells faintly like the perfume you always wear.

in her head, the whole drive over, she rehearses, and then dismisses, and then repeats the things she wants to say. she wonders if it would be easier if you weren't here, if she had a week or two, or hell, even a few more hours, to really think it over. but the fact is, she doesn't, and she can't afford to wait or plan or calculate a million different outcomes. not right now, or ever, because life is messy and short, and there aren't enough hours to be careful or self-aware, not in the right ways, anyway.

so when the elevator reaches your floor, she doesn't know what she's walking into. she doesn't even know if you want her there because you miss her or because everything fell apart and you needed someone you could ruin gently.

but she continues to walk towards that door.

because she would go even if you hadn't asked.

you don't open the door right away.

karina lifts her hand to knock a second time, but the lock clicks, and there you are—hoodie sleeves past your hands, eyes rimmed pink.

you're tired. exhausted, really. the type where a part of you thinks you won't get any real sleep, even if you try.

"hi," she whispers.

you hold the door wider.

"come in."

when the door is shut behind her, you move to your room, not speaking.

she doesn't ask any questions.

the door opens, and you disappear inside.

she follows, closing the door and dropping her bag near the doorway, and you're already sitting on your bed, staring at her, waiting.

"you look tired," she says.

you nod. "didn't sleep much."

she fidgets with the drawstring on her hoodie. "me neither."

she takes a breath, trying to decide how she wants to do this—if she should ask first, or dive right in, or even speak at all.

her mouth opens. closes.

you speak first.

"i didn't know who else to call."

karina's eyes soften, her posture relaxing slightly. her words come out slower, less calculated. "i'm glad you did."

you exhale slowly, rubbing your palm over your thigh.

"feels like i've been holding my breath for two weeks straight."

karina swallows.

you glance at her, then away. "i thought maybe i imagined everything. us."

she flinches.

and for a second, you wish you could take it back. but she lifts her chin and looks at you.

"you didn't."

you don't move. just stare at each other, a strange, tense silence falling between the two of you.

it goes on for a while. too long.

until karina moves. slowly, like she's scared, like you might run, or snap, or worse—but she still moves.

she stands in front of you and hesitates only once before taking a seat on the bed.

"it feels like my life is running away from me."

karina frowns, brow furrowing, a bit lost.

you're not going to have enough money for rent this month and your tuition because fuck, because you went home only to be reminded that family doesn't always mean home.

your voice drops lower, and a strange emotion passes over your face, raw, almost.

"i also... i keep... feeling like you are too. and i never got the chance to stop it. because we were so busy, and then there wasn't a good moment, or a time, or anything and—"

"hey," karina interrupts, "what? hey, slow down."

your gaze lifts to hers, and the second you do, she knows exactly what's happening, and it hurts in the best and worst ways possible.

"talk to me," she whispers, taking your hand and squeezing it lightly. "tell me."

you swallow.

"you're a fucking star, y'know. like, literally, not figuratively. and i can't get to you."

she frowns.

"you're so far out of my orbit, and it's selfish and dumb, and i'm sorry, and—"

"hey, hey," she murmurs, scooting closer, cupping the side of your neck. you inhale shakily, and she shakes her head.

"don't."

"don't what?"

"don't say things you're not going to let me reply to."

you fall silent.

"it's okay," she says, "just listen."

she holds your hand in hers, smoothing her thumb across your knuckles.

"there's not a place, not a galaxy, not an entire universe out there that you aren't allowed in." she says it with a kind of steady, desperate conviction, her voice growing a little thicker. you try to swallow around the tightness in your throat, but she keeps talking, and her words come slowly, the way they always do when she's nervous or worried.

"i wanted to come earlier. i—i almost got in trouble just trying to leave the dorm tonight. it's been... weird lately."

you blink. "weird how?"

karina hesitates. she lets out a breath, then looks down at your intertwined hands before murmuring, "there's a new dating ban. it's... official. a rule, now since our comeback is happening, and we had meetings about it and the company's being... strict."

your stomach flips.

you're quiet for a long time. too long.

karina rushes to fill the space, her voice rising.

"i didn't want to tell you because i knew—i know—how it sounds. like an excuse, or like i'm choosing something over you, and i'm not. i swear i'm not—"

"rina."

she stops.

you're still calm. still.

not because you don't care. you do—god, you do—but you're too tired to panic. too tired to do the whole dramatic, spiraling thing. you've done it enough the past two weeks.

"you love your job," you say softly. "and you're amazing at it."

she nods, shakily.

"i always knew this might happen," you continue, looking at her. "and i knew it wouldn't be easy."

karina makes a noise, pained.

her eyes brim. you know that look. you know what's coming.

"but i love you," she whispers, her voice cracking on the word. "i love you, and i'm scared. i've never—this is the only time i've ever been scared of love. i didn't even know that was a thing."

you close your eyes.

"rina..."

"no, wait." she leans forward now, pressing her forehead to yours. her hands tremble on your shoulders. "i've never loved anyone like i love you. never. i don't think i can. i think that's it for me. you're it."

you exhale sharply, eyes still shut, like maybe if you don't look at her, you won't fall apart.

"and if i lose you because of some stupid contract, i don't know what i'll do. i don't know how to be okay with that."

your voice is barely above a whisper. "if you leave me today, i'll still be here. i'm not going anywhere."

she nods. swallows. neither of you move, foreheads still touching.

she speaks first.

"y/n."

your hands move to frame her face, tilting her chin up, and her eyelashes flutter.

"can you kiss me, please?"

so you do.

you tilt her chin up and brush a kiss across her lips, and you feel her breathe into it, a sigh that settles over both of you and melts the remaining distance away.

when the kiss breaks, she doesn't move away, staying pressed as close as she can.

"i don't wanna make you wait long. not forever, not even a year or two."

you run a knuckle over her cheekbone. "i'd wait," you say.

she looks down.

"no one's made me feel the way you have," you whisper.

her eyes snap back to yours. "really?"

you smile faintly. "that's pretty cheesy," you point out, but the words sound fragile, almost.

she ignores it.

"is it true?"

you nod.

"yeah."

she reaches for you, arms sliding over your shoulders and wrapping loosely around your neck, her mouth a hairsbreadth from yours. she kisses the corner of your mouth, once, and again, lingering, warm.

you exhale, turning your head slightly so her mouth catches yours, and you're kissing her again.

and karina goes pliant, melting into you.

⭑𓂃

you're sitting on the curb outside the café where you work, half a sandwich in hand, picking the crust off even though you're hungry. it's just past 3 p.m., and it's quite hot outside for springtime.

"that you?" jae's voice calls out.

you don't even turn your head. "who else would it be? my evil twin sister? i thought she was supposed to visit next week, but maybe i was mistaken—"

"god, i get it." he sighs dramatically. you finally glance over and watch him cross the street without looking because he's an idiot with his backpack hanging off one shoulder. he looks sweaty, a bit flushed from the heat, hair sticking to his forehead.

you try not to cringe.

he joins you on the curb, pulling his water bottle out, taking a huge swig. when he lowers it, a bit of droplets stick to the corner of his mouth. gross.

jae swallows and then glances at your hand.

he grimaces. "that's not the healthiest choice for lunch."

"don't start. the fridge is empty."

he rolls his eyes. "why's that any surprise."

"bitch, can i eat in peace?" he laughs, and you fight a smile.

the sun beats down a bit, the two of you quiet, before his gaze moves toward the parking lot and he speaks.

it's been a long week. month. year. you're not even sure anymore. but it's been quieter lately. still hard sometimes, still weird, but manageable. like you're finally catching your breath after forgetting how to breathe.

he nudges your side gently, bringing you back.

"how was the morning shift?"

you shrug. "long, mostly. not busy enough."

he snorts.

"you used to complain that it was too busy... so now i'm just a little confused."

"mmm... well. now, it's annoying, because i'm bored."

"you're a weird one."

"i know," you sigh.

you look down at your knees, jeans faded and soft from overuse.

"my parents finalized the divorce," you say. "like, last week."

jae looks at you, but doesn't interrupt.

"i didn't even feel anything when they told me," you continue, voice low. "it was just like—okay. cool. we're done pretending."

"i'm sorry."

you nod once. "i think i used to believe that people would stay together for the sake of the family. their kids. their kid. it was easier to pretend than to tell the truth. and that sucks. the lies were kinder than the real thing."

you lean back, palms against the sidewalk. "we can't control other people."

you feel the weight of his stare.

"i'm just glad that's over."

he doesn't say anything after that. just bumps his shoulder against yours.

"you still thinking about acting?" he asks after a moment.

you blink. "sometimes."

"i think you should."

you scoff. "you think i should audition for those weird web dramas with twelve views and a fake sponsor?"

"nah," he says. "i think you should actually do something with it. you've got that thing."

you arch a brow. "what thing?"

"the sad, haunted vibe. directors love that."

you laugh—like, really laugh—for the first time that day. "you're an asshole."

"but i'm right," he smirks. "you've always wanted this. don't act like you haven't been quietly posting monologue tests on your finsta again."

you squint. "how do you know about that?"

"i have spies."

you roll your eyes, smiling, before muttering, "it feels a bit dumb. chasing something like this. there are more stable, reasonable things to chase, and most people wouldn't just jump ship and follow a stupid dream."

"and that's exactly why you should do it," he replies, shrugging. "do what scares you."

your stomach does an odd little flip. you look down at your feet. "when did you get all wise and shit."

"im not actually a bimbo, you know," he mutters.

"oh, trust me, i'm aware. it's just... nice. the way you're good at putting things. makes you a great guy."

"you're sweet," he drawls sarcastically. you grin, leaning back. the sun feels good on your face, warm and light and soothing, and the air isn't heavy, doesn't feel tight.

he stands up after a bit and stretches. "you walking home?"

"yeah."

"i'll come with," he says. "i need to get some chips anyway."

you both end up walking in silence for a bit, until you stop outside the gs25.

"i'll just be a second," you say, slipping inside and heading straight for the atm in the corner. another semester another payment.

it's second nature when you insert your card, type your id, curse at the tuition balance, and pay what you can. but today's different. you punch in your info. the screen loads. and then—

₩0 krw

you stare. you check the number again. blink a few times. hit refresh. same thing. ₩0 krw. "what the..."

you back out of the page. re-enter your info. nothing changes.

you look around like someone's gonna explain it. the cashier's talking on the phone about some anime. no help there. you hit the button to print a receipt. hold it in your hand. ₩0 krw

you walk outside, clutching the slip like it's about to start burning in your hand. "yo," jae says, tossing his empty water bottle in the air. "you good?"

you blink at him. "i think—" you hold up the receipt. "the machine's broken."

"why?"

"it says my tuition's zero."

"isn't that a good thing?"

"no—it's not right. i didn't pay it yet."

he frowns. "like, not even a partial thing?"

"nothing. it's cleared."

jae tilts his head. "maybe check on your laptop when you get home?"

you nod slowly. "yeah. yeah."

the rest of the walk is weird. your fingers are still gripping the paper like it might start making sense if you fold it enough times.

when you get inside, sora's on the floor doing her nails. she glances up at the door closing, then back to you. "helloooooooo."

"hi," you croak, not even registering her tone, not looking her in the eye as you kick off your shoes. she raises a brow, noticing the strange shift, and continues to paint her nails.

"uh-oh."

"huh?"

"are you still mad i finished death note without you?"

"not today, sora, not today."

she puts her brush down and leans back, stretching her legs out. "oh my god, are you dying or something? or, oh! you found out the bakery stopped making the blueberry muffins you love. is that it? is the world coming to an end?"

you take a slow, deep breath.

"my tuition's paid."

her lips curl into a confused smile. "that's a good thing, no?"

you think out your lips. "no. yes. i don't know. i'll be right back." you mumble, heading straight for your room.

"weirdo!"

you open the student portal, enter your password, and wait, chewing the inside of your cheek.

same result.

tuition paid. balance: ₩0 krw. you stare at the screen for a long, long time. then you call the finance office. miraculously, someone picks up. "hi—i just... i'm seeing something strange on my account? i was going to pay my tuition today, but it says my balance is zero. i haven't made any recent payments, so i'm wondering if it's a system error—"

"can i get your student id?" the woman asks.

you give it.

there's typing on the other end.

"it says here your account was settled earlier this week. monday."

"settled... like paid?"

"yes. full amount."

you press the phone tighter against your ear. "by who?"

"the payment was made via direct transfer."

"so—was there a name?"

more typing.

"no name listed. it was submitted anonymously."

anonymous.

funny how unanimous that action is.

"is everything okay?" jae asks from the doorway.

you glance back at the screen, where the total's still the same. ₩0 krw.

you haven't touched it since, just left it open because maybe if you didn't believe it, it'd change. but it hasn't, and now you're sitting with the receipt you printed, trying to wrap your brain around it.

"i don't know what i'm gonna do," you manage, eyes burning.

jae sits on the bed next to you and offers you his palm. you place the slip in it.

he studies it. then the screen. then looks over at you.

"have you thanked your mom for this, yet?"

your expression shutters. "it wasn't her."

"how are you so sure?"

you meet his eyes, steady, even though your hands are trembling a bit. "i would've known if it was."

he pauses, seeming to recognize that, then looks back to the screen.

"okay, so, we don't know who it was, then. but... does it matter, y/n? isn't it good, or something? that you don't owe anything?"

your stomach knots, but you swallow and nod.

"i guess."

jae nudges your knee.

"you know who it is?"

"it was karina."

it's the only option that makes sense. you'd mentioned to her the struggle once or twice, in passing. nothing detailed. but it had always been the most likely choice.

she knew.

knew what your family was like, where your headspace was. and somehow, through it all, through her own life falling apart, through a dating ban that would leave both of you raw, bleeding, she had remembered and done the one thing that was easy and hard and messy and clean all at the same time.

the two of you haven't spoken in five months. not since christmas, when you were the one that was the coward, who told yourself it was easier, that the distance would heal whatever wounds you didn't want to touch, or see, or even acknowledge.

and the truth is, it hasn't. the truth is, the cuts and bruises are still there, still fresh, and they still hurt.

they've gotten easier, sure. better. the pain lessened.

but there's still a hole in you. not a huge one. just a spot where she used to be. a spot no one else can reach or fill.

and a part of you hates her for that. and another part is still a little in love with her.

"well," he murmurs.

"well," you echo, eyes drifting back toward the laptop, the numbers.

"are you gonna text her?"

"why would i."

"to say thanks? or sorry. or whatever else."

"i...can't."

"why?"

your jaw works. you look down. "because," you sigh. "i just can't."

"you're acting like a baby."

he says it like he's tired for you. like he's been watching you circle the same block of grief for months, slowing only to pretend you're fine before picking up speed again. like he's held the door open all winter, and you're the one refusing to walk through.

you press your knuckles to your eyes. "i'm not ready."

he shifts beside you.

"her comeback's not over," you admit after a beat, voice quiet. "the dating ban's still in place. and i—"

you exhale, shaky. "i don't think i could handle it, jae. seeing her, but not having her. talking, but only through windows. being careful all the time. like—like i'd be setting myself on fire just to sit next to her again."

his expression softens.

he knows you mean that, in every sense.

"you're the strongest person i've ever met, y/n."

you breathe out a laugh.

"i'm serious," jae says. "what you're doing is really brave."

"running away?"

"facing reality."

you take a moment. think, for once. "sometimes, i wonder," you say, the words coming slowly, hesitantly. "if... i'm really making the right choice. is this fair, y'know, for either of us?"

"you're not hurting anyone."

you look down at the sheets. "but am i hurting her."

"she chose her job. and you chose to move on. no one's fault. no one's mistake."

you bite your lip. a long silence. the fan spins overhead, quiet.

your voice is the first to return, hoarse."y ou think i'll ever stop loving her?"

jae doesn't answer right away. you don't look at him.

but eventually, he says, just above a whisper,

"i think you were meant to."

you let out a soft laugh, then a sniff follows behind, and for the first time in months, you let yourself cry.

main masterlist. part one. part two.

[bytemee]

OPERA HOUSE 2 — yu jimin.

♫ playing… opera house by cigarettes after sex

synopsis. you moved to seoul for school, with barely enough money to cover your rent, a language you were still learning clumsy and slow, and your little sister back home constantly asking you to look out for her favorite idols, as if they’d just show up next to you at a crosswalk.

you weren’t here to chase anything. not fame, not love, not even a dream, really but just something to make it through.

but she found you anyway, and in her mind, without meaning to, she started building something quiet and vast just for you — like an opera house tucked deep in a place no one else could reach, a place no one else would ever know how to find, and she still doesn’t understand why or how or what it was supposed to mean, only that she was meant to love you, and even now, even after everything, she still does.

pairing. idol!karina x collegestudent!fem!reader

genre. romance, slow burn, angst / hurt-comfort, emotional drama.

disclaimer(s). unresolved trauma, ANGST bruh, fluffy too heh, kissing, L translated korean (not a lot dont fear), lot of timeskips, karina wants that cookie so bad dude...and let me know if there's more!

3 split bc tumblr keeps saying "1000 blocks limit" or sum idk bruh.

word count. 6.8k

main masterlist. part one. part three.

you used to think idols had no time for anything but their work—that their lives were too rigid, too choreographed, too consumed with schedules and appearances to make space for anything personal. especially someone like karina.

but that theory had been unraveling for weeks now.

it started quietly. a string of replies that slowly bled into regular texting. a few calls that felt like accidents, or at least things she didn't mean to let stretch past ten minutes—except they always did. you'd be brushing your teeth, or making dinner, or walking home in the rain, and somehow she'd be on the other end of it. not saying much at first. then saying everything. she inserted herself into your days like she belonged in them. like she'd found a crack in your daily routine and wedged herself there with enough curiosity to make it feel natural. karina didn't ask for permission. she just showed up.

there wasn't any sense to it. just random snapshots, spaced apart.

like:

you:

you know you have a whole closet full of those, right?

karina:

no

karina:

i need these exact ones.

you never meant to become her outlet. never imagined her texting you in the middle of the day because her manager forgot to buy her lunch and her stomach was growling. or because giselle was stress eating chips again. or because yizhuo had locked her out of the dorm and wouldn't answer the door, and she needed someone else to complain to.

you were supposed to be the sister of her biggest fan, or the girl who gave her the bracelet. not her confidant. not her friend.but that was exactly how this had played out. you didn't even realize how much she was around—virtually—until your friends started noticing.

jae had come over that night, loud as ever, the door creaking open just as he muttered something about needing sora's time.

you were in the living room with your headphones on, eyes locked on the laptop, a pencil spinning in your fingers. he didn't say anything at first, just walked past with his towel draped around his neck.

a few minutes later, jae sauntered out, pulling a clean t-shirt over his head, and stopped. were his ears playing tricks on him, or was he hearing this correctly? you had music on, blasting a playlist while working on an assignment. that much was clear. the weird thing was—the thing he had definitely not expected—was that you were singing along.

but the song... was different.

very different for someone who wasn't a fan of aespa or k-pop at that. "there's no way she's listening to long chat," he mumbled to himself, walking away, shaking his head.

sora had her own moment a few days later. you were helping her pack for a short trip—folding jeans, tossing laundry, half-distracted—when you mumbled the lyrics to girls under your breath without thinking.

she whipped her head around like she'd just confessed to a crime. "excuse me?" she asked.

you looked at her, confused. the two of you stared at each other. "okay. so," sora said, voice high. "i'm not trying to freak out here. but are you... maybe listening to aespa lately?"

"no," you denied immediately. then, because that was suspicious:

"why?"

"i dunno. you just kinda sang the beginning to a certain song and, uh, i was a little confused."

"what, so i'm not allowed to listen to new music?"

"new?"

"recent."

she frowned. "is that what we're calling it?"

"what, sora. what are you saying?"

"nothing." she threw a sweater into her bag and zipped it closed. then, innocently,

you were walking home from campus the day karina texted you something dumb and simple — a check-in wrapped in complaint, sent without ceremony.

karina:

i'm hungry

you didn't even hesitate.

you:

eat

karina:

yeah but i don't wanna cook

you snorted.

you:

i didn't know we lived in 1990 where food services don't deliver

karina:

😔…

karina:

are u gonna eat dinner

you paused, thumb hovering over the keyboard.

you:

most likely

there was a beat.

karina:

do u always dodge questions like this or is it just with me

bc i feel like you're trying not to offer me food rn

you:

do you always ask for stuff like this indirectly

karina:

what are you cooking

and somehow, that was that. you cooked. two bowls. one for you, one for her. and when she got there, eyes hidden behind a bucket hat and sunglasses, mouth pulled in a small smile, you didn't invite her into your apartment.

instead, you led her up to the roof.

the night was chilly, the wind crisp and sharp. there were no lights up here. not like the rest of the city, but you could see the buildings sprawling, the traffic slowing down, and the glow of the billboards.

you pulled out the chairs from the corner and laid the food down. she didn't say much when she sat down, just glanced around and pulled the hood of her jacket tighter.

the food was warm between your hands, steaming slightly in the cold.

you looked up.

karina had her gaze fixed across the street, watching the people and cars pass. her mouth was curved in a way you'd begun to recognize—a subtle quirk, a tug to the left. "thanks," she said quietly.

"sure."

you slid the bowl across the table.

she ate slowly, like she was tasting each bite for the first time.

"this is really good," she murmured eventually.

you looked at her from across the blanket, the tupperware of rice and kimchi stew between you. "i didn't know you were picky."

"i'm not," she said, mouth half-full.

"mhm."

karina stuck her tongue out.

"so," you said, stirring your bowl, "what made you pick tonight, huh?"

karina hummed, eyes still on the horizon. "no reason. i wanted to see you." your stomach flipped once, a strange kind of excitement that spread to your chest.

"well," you said, quietly, "here i am."

karina looked up then, her smile slow and easy, and your heart skipped again, stuttering like it couldn't catch its rhythm. it was a quiet, uncomplicated moment. just the two of you and the dim skyline, a familiar sight against unfamiliar words.

she raised the spoon to her mouth, chewing slowly, her eyes still on the view. "here you are," she echoed.

your eyes fell to her wrist, where the bracelet was. still clasped tight, glinting under the pale streetlights, the silver charms swaying gently with each movement.

a sigh. a laugh, barely audible. "do you really wear it every day? you know you can take it off whenever you want."

"why would i take it off?"

your mouth stayed shut because the answer seemed obvious. the bracelet wasn't worth anything. it didn't make her any more popular than she already was. "because you can," you said instead.

she shrugged. "i don't need to."

"okay," you murmured, looking back down.

she stirred her stew a bit, and you watched her, trying not to notice how soft her features were in the dark. how she seemed less idol and more human, and somehow even better.

then your phone buzzed. livi (3 missed calls)

your chest tightened. you stood, excusing yourself softly and walking toward the stairwell. you answered the next call.

livi was crying—quiet, muffled. you barely got more than "i just wanted to hear your voice" before you could hear your mom shouting in the background. something dealing with your dad, maybe. probably. "y/n, are you—"

"it's fine. it'll be okay, livi."

"i don't understand," she said, sobbing. "he won't listen to her—it's not right." her tone made your stomach twist.

you crouched down by the door and talked her through it, your voice low and gentle. you told her to breathe. you told her to stay in her room. you told her you'd call again tomorrow and that she wasn't alone. because what else could you do 7,000 miles away, helpless and frustrated, watching a family fall apart?

when you finally hung up, you stood there for a second. the wind was cooler now. your eyes burned. you took a breath.

when you came back to the roof, karina was watching the skyline, but she turned immediately when she saw your face.

she didn't ask what happened. not directly. but her expression changed—softened. "everything okay?" she asked quietly.

you nodded once. "yeah. just—family stuff."

she didn't press.

there was silence again. then she nudged your container closer to you, expression unreadable.

"you didn't eat," she said.

you stared down at the bowl. then at her.

there was no pity. no condescension. nothing but a simple question.

so,

you picked up the chopsticks.

a few hours later, the bowls were empty, the streets quiet. you were leaning back in your chair, and karina was beside you, her feet up on the ledge. "you're a little different than i expected," she said, looking out at the skyline again.

you rubbed your jaw. "same could be said about you."

her eyes flicked over, catching the curve of a smirk.

you didn't tell her how your sister cried herself to sleep or that she called you when things were bad. or that the thought of leaving her in that house had haunted you since the moment you got on a plane to seoul.

maybe one day.

not today.

today, you stayed in this tiny moment, in this bubble with her, in this small pocket of the city, tucked in the dark.

eventually, she shifted beside you, pulling her phone from her pocket and checking the time.

"i should go," she murmured. "i have practice early. again."

you nodded, a bit too fast. she noticed. she didn't say anything, just stood, brushing off the back of her jeans. but before you could do the same, her hand hovered midair like she was about to offer it to help you up.

she didn't, though. she just glanced at her fingers, then back at you, and said, "you wanna come with me?"

you blinked. "to...?"

"practice," she said, like it was obvious. "it's a full-day rehearsal. i won't be free after today for a while, and—" she paused. "i'd rather not wait another week to see you."

you hesitated.

she bit her lip when you didn't answer right away. "you don't have to. it's probably boring, watching people sweat for hours—"

"i'll come."

her eyes flicked up. she looked surprised, almost. like she wasn't expecting you to say yes. "okay," she said, softer than before. "okay. i'll text you the details."

and she did. that night, not even thirty minutes after she left your apartment, her name lit up your phone again.

karina:

10am sharp. don't bring coffee unless you want to be guilt-tripped into sharing it with seven people.

you smiled at your screen for longer than you meant to.

you:

so no coffee

but i can bring snacks?

karina:

just yourself

you stared at the messages for a second, thumb frozen again.

eventually, you typed:

see you tomorrow.

the next morning you had no idea how your legs carried you through the front doors.

sm was intimidating, even from the outside. glass panels, security that clocked you the second you stepped through the front gate, and a front desk that made you feel like you needed to announce your presence with a bow and some kind of certificate. you half-expected someone to stop you, or at least question the duffel bag hanging off your shoulder like you were smuggling something.

but no one did. you gave your name, mumbled something about being a guest of "karina," and the receptionist only raised her brows like she knew. you were handed a sticker to wear, a temporary pass, and directed to the right floor.

you thanked her with a small bow and then tried to walk like you belonged there.

the practice room door was already cracked open when you got to it. you heard music before anything else and although you've done a deep dive in their discography, you couldn't tell which song it was.

karina was mid-formation, in a black cap along with a black cropped tee and black pants. she hit each beat like she wasn't even thinking. the rest of aespa was there too, spaced around her in coordinated movement, but it was hard to see anything else. your heart thudded a little too loud for something so simple.

you slipped in quietly, settling by the mirrored wall just past the entrance. you stayed there, unsure what to do with your hands, clutching your bag like a shield while the music played on.

no one said anything at first. not until the song faded out and the girls fell into loose, breathless positions, catching their breath and grabbing water. karina noticed you almost instantly, even with her head down and her back turned. it was like she felt you there.

her face shifted when she turned around. not shock, no, it was more of a softening. a slight, unconscious quirk of the lips that spread into a real, genuine grin as she jogged over.

"hi."

you couldn't hold back the smile, either. "hey, stranger."

she stopped a few inches in front of you, a hair too close to be friendly. her chest rose and fell. her hair was sticking to the sides of her neck. her cheeks were flushed pink, and she looked like the prettiest girl in the world.

you wondered if she knew.

then, she spoke:

"you came," she breathed, and she sounded genuinely pleased.

"yeah." you grinned, rubbing the back of your neck. "i uh, brought snacks."

you lifted the bag like it was a peace offering. "chips, dried mango, and some weird pretzels i found at the store. whatever looked good, i guess."

karina didn't take the bag, just reached forward and pushed your hand back toward you, the corners of her mouth lifted in a warm, amused expression.

"it's fine." she shrugged, shaking her head.

"what?"

she rolled her eyes. "do i have to spell everything out for you, y/n?"

"yes," you said. "pretty please."

that made her smile. "it means that we're not hungry. the manager ordered food already."

"oh."

"mhm."

she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"okay. then—" you lowered the bag.

"yeah, we have stuff. here."

she took the bag. set it on a chair by the mirror. you watched, still a little embarrassed, and felt something pinch at your waist.

you blinked and realized her hand had been on you the entire time. her fingers curled at the bottom of your jacket, holding you there. behind her, you could hear someone whisper something in a low voice. and then laughter. light, teasing. a glance thrown your way.

karina didn't turn around. she stayed focused on you. "you wanna sit down?"

"yeah."

she dropped her hand. you missed it immediately.

she nodded toward a spot by the mirror, the corner away from the other girls.

"over there is good."

you followed her without thinking. she slid down the wall and patted the floor. you sat too, close enough that you could feel the heat from her bare skin.

you sat, a little unsure. she tilted her head, trying not to look too amused.

"it's not comfortable," you warned.

"we don't have chairs," she pointed out. "and they removed the couch for more room."

"mhm."

karina stood up, patting your head before moving toward the middle of the practice room. they ran another piece after that, something shorter. this time, you watched from the floor, sipping on a bottle of water and pretending like the mirror wasn't there and that your own reflection wasn't staring back.

earlier. the members kept sneaking glances—some subtle, some very not—but no one said anything.

and karina? every time the choreography gave her a chance to pause, she looked at you. she had this playful little smile, half-hidden, but still there. her gaze would fall, and her expression would shift, like a quiet secret.

they took a break after that. the music cut off, and everyone collapsed around you like gravity decided the middle of the floor was safest. karina sat down cross-legged next to you and rummaged through the bag like it was hers.

"i thought you guys said you had snacks," you mumbled to her.

"shhh," she murmured back.

you ended up passing things out—snacks, drinks, and even a few of the little folded napkins you packed without thinking. it was weirdly domestic, like you were on a school picnic and not sitting in the center of a practice room surrounded by idols.

"you're so different from what she made you sound like," winter said suddenly, peering at you with a soft smile.

you blinked. "what did she make me sound like?"

karina groaned. "don't answer that."

"quiet," winter replied with a fake innocent shrug, ignoring her. "shy, cold—ouch."

karina leaned over and pinched her arm. winter laughed, as karina muttered. "i didn't say cold."

you looked at her, "no?"

she shook her head. "i said you were careful."

you didn't say anything. not at first. not until the others got distracted with the snacks and someone's phone rang.

"careful," you repeated, raising an eyebrow.

she hummed. her tone was casual. nonchalant, even. like she was telling a story about a friend and not herself.

"maybe guarded."

she glanced at you, eyes lingering. her lashes cast shadows along her cheekbones. her jaw was sharp.

"why did you want to be an actress?" she asked quietly.

the question threw you off, somehow.

"it sounds stupid," you admitted.

karina tilted her head. "try me."

you let out a breath. "it feels easier to be someone else, i guess. to have a set story to follow. the beginning, the end, the happy ending. it all seems much more clear."

her gaze flickered. a flash of understanding. a flicker of recognition. "i get that," she said, voice quiet. "a lot."

you let out a soft sigh.

"i know."

for a second, neither of you said anything.

"so, do you like being an idol?" you asked.

karina smiled a bit. not quite an answer, not yet. "do you think i'd still be an idol if i didn't?"

"i mean—" you frowned, thinking. "i guess not."

"good deduction."

you huffed. "well, im never trying to start a conversation with you again."

that earned a laugh, loud and bright. "wait. no, please keep going."

"are you making fun of me?"

"would i do that?"

"yes."

she didn't try to hide her grin, just lowered her head. her shoulders shook, and the amusement didn't leave her expression, even as she leaned against the mirror and looked at the others.

"i used to wish i was normal, sometimes."

"like, an ordinary person?"

"something like that, yeah. no cameras. no schedules. no fansites outside the window."

you waited. she was thinking.

"i just wanted to... i dunno. walk outside. breathe. get a cup of coffee or take my friends out for ice cream and not have to worry about who's following me. but i could never explain how it felt. how real the fear is. how you always wonder if people are really looking at you or just seeing a caricature. an idea."

"do people ever treat you normally?"

she thought.

then, quietly: "you do."

the words settled slowly. "oh," you said.

"yeah," she said.

⭑𓂃

your cheek is pressed into your pillow, your phone on speaker beside you. the screen's dark now—you didn't even realize how long it'd been since either of you checked the time. your legs are tangled in a blanket you haven't fully pulled over yourself, and karina's voice is still soft and scratchy, the kind you remember hearing on a rainy morning in her dorm when you didn't ask her how long she'd been up.

it wasn't that you weren't tired.

it was just...

there was something about late-night conversations—about talking until the clock passed three a.m. and the stars were still hanging outside the window, about feeling the words curl between you and drift up to the ceiling, the silence of the room stretching between the two of you in a way that made every word count.

you didn't want it to end, and you didn't feel the need to fill the pauses. you weren't sure when your breaths had synced up, or why the beat of her voice started to feel familiar, but it did.

"is it bad if i don't wanna sleep yet?" she mumbled.

you turned onto your back and closed your eyes. "nope."

she hummed. "good."

"what are you doing right now?" she asks, quieter this time.

"nothing. lying here. trying to decide if failing my 8 a.m. is worth hearing you tell me how you nearly faceplanted during warmups."

"i did not nearly faceplant—"

"you literally said, 'i tripped so hard today. it was bad. even winter was laughing, and that usually means it was embarrassing and awful. i could die, y/n. this is it. this is my final curtain call—'"

her voice dropped, the pitch rising. "i did not sound like that."

you grinned.

"since you weren't scared to come last week, does that mean you'll come again?" she asks suddenly, more tentative now.

"who said i wasn't scared last week?"

"y/n," she chided.

"what? i'm kidding," you laughed. "and, yeah. of course."

"of course?"

"mhm."

a pause.

"well, okay." she sounded pleased. "it's just not as much fun when you aren't around."

something twisted inside you, something sweet and foreign, spreading slowly from your chest to your limbs, curling into the space under your ribs.

"no pressure, though. seriously."

you snorted, rubbing a hand over your eyes. "trust me. that's not what i was thinking."

"no?"

"no."

your door creaks open. a head pops in, messy hair and sleepy eyes. sora squints into the dimness. "you're still on the phone?"

you sit up slightly. "yeah. sorry. i'll keep it down."

she walks in anyway, wearing a hoodie and socks that don't match. she gives you a tired smile and plops down on your bed, close enough that the mattress dips.

"you smell good. did you use the conditioner i got you?"

you look at her and hum before turning back to the phone. "she always does this," you say into the speaker. "can't sleep without company."

you hear karina laugh softly. "that your roommate?" she asks, her voice breezy but a bit too casual.

"yeah. sora. she's been here longer than me. kind of adopted me when i moved here."

"you guys seem close."

you glance at her. sora's already curled into your extra blanket, scrolling aimlessly on her phone with the brightness way down. you nod.

"yeah. she's like—" you pause. "i don't know. my person, i guess."

sora looks up, makes eye contact, and grins.

you stick your tongue out at her. karina is quiet for a second, and then she says, her voice a little softer. "that's nice."

it's not sarcastic. it's more... thoughtful. like she's hearing something you didn't mean to say out loud. something that makes her heart tug a little. something that makes her wonder what she's even doing, lying in bed at midnight, waiting for a goodnight from someone who has someone else they call their person.

"anyway," she says finally, clearing her throat, "you should sleep."

you don't argue this time. your eyes are getting heavy anyway. you adjust your pillow, phone balanced on your chest.

"hey," you say before she can hang up.

"hm?"

you pause.

you don't know why. you've texted her good morning and good night every day since you gave her your number. but saying it like this feels different. like it's a bigger confession, somehow.

you press on.

"sweet dreams," you murmur, quiet.

a few seconds pass, and then there's a breath on the other line, and when she speaks, her voice is even lower, barely above a whisper.

"good night, y/n."

karina doesn't move after the call ends. the room is silent again, but she still keeps the screen against her ear, holding onto the moment like a prayer.

you sounded sleepy. and warm. and like you didn't want to hang up either, even though you did. even though you had every reason to—classes, life, and responsibilities.

even so.

and karina...

karina's here, alone, clutching her phone like a fool, thinking about your laugh echoing through tinny speakers. she exhales through her nose. swipes her phone open again. locks it. opens it. locks it again.

stupid.

she should be asleep. she's got schedules stacked like dominoes tomorrow—vocal lessons at 10, a shoot at 1, and another practice run-through in the evening. she should be tired. is tired. but the warmth of your voice is still in her ears. like an imprint.

"my person," you'd said, about that girl. sora.

it shouldn't bother her. she barely knows you. you barely know her, but her stomach twisted anyway.

she puts her phone face-down on her nightstand and rolls over with a groan.

it's not even jealousy exactly. not really. it's more like...

i want to be that person for you. i want you to look at me like that. i want to be the one who makes you laugh like that. i want to be the reason you fall asleep smiling.

she presses her face into her pillow.

you had said you wanted to see her again—and that was supposed to be enough. but now she's wide awake and wondering if she's imagining the shift. if she's projecting the tension. if you meant what you said, or if it was just a nice thing.

but you wouldn't say anything unless you meant it, right?

she shuts her eyes, trying to will the ache away.

tomorrow she'll act normal again. she'll text you a meme or send a dumb voice note, something breezy and cute and detached. something that makes her look like she's not replaying everything you say like a lyric she can't stop humming.

but right now, it doesn't feel possible.

⭑𓂃

the weeks go by fast. faster than expected, somehow, even when your classes get busier and the restaurant gets fuller by the week. but today is the day you get to relax.

well, kind of.

see, you don't usually do much for your birthday. it's never really been your thing to throw a huge party or go out drinking. and this year is no exception.

it starts with your phone buzzing nonstop the second you open your eyes—livi's voice practically screaming through the phone at 8 a.m., singing an aggressively off-key version of "happy birthday." sora and jae pile into your bed with cereal and a candle in a slice of toast. you laugh so hard you can't even blow it out.

a facetime from your aunt.

a goofy tiktok from your friends back home.

a text from your lab partner that says, "ur not that old lol happy bday tho."

you scroll through all the notifications and the well wishes and the ridiculous texts. then, when you get to the oldest one, you break out in a smile.

karina:

good morning! happy birthday :)

the message is from 12:00 on the dot, like she had waited to hit send, like she wanted it to be the first message. you roll your eyes, a warmth spreading across your cheeks as you type a reply.

you:

thanks :)

karina:

there you are! how does it feel being 1 year older?

you:

about the same

karina:

no midlife crisis yet?

you:

nope

karina:

that sucks :(

happy birthday anyway

your smile deepened, and you pressed the call button without hesitation. she picked up right away. "hi," you breathed.

"hey."

there's a beat.

"what are you doing?" you ask.

"uh, right now i'm on the way to an event."

"oh," you said, looking down.

"and you?" she asked quickly, filling the space.

"um." you shifted in your chair, flipping a page in your notebook. currently you were studying for your math exam, trying to focus between birthday messages. "studying. for that math exam i told you about."

karina made a soft noise of sympathy through the phone. "gross."

"yeah," you muttered, then smiled faintly. "sora keeps telling me to stay in my room until the party. she's being suspicious."

"you're having a party?" she asked, a touch of amusement in her voice.

you flipped your pencil between your fingers. "kind of? just a small thing. sora, jae, vivian. probably some paper hats and cake from the grocery store. a card with ten bucks in it, maybe, if they care enough."

karina hummed, and you swore you could hear a smile in her voice. "sounds wild."

"oh yeah. very exclusive. a guest list of four."

"i bet it'll be fun," she said lightly, then after a pause, added, "do you want me to come?" the question caught you off guard. you hadn't really been serious when you joked about it earlier in the week.

"i mean... if you're free," you offered casually, trying not to sound too hopeful. "it's not a big thing, but. yeah. you'd be welcome."

karina laughed. "okay. i'll think about it."

you grin. "wow, i feel so honored."

"you should."

there was a commotion in the background—a muffled shout, a few loud voices. karina spoke again, a little distracted, but not rushed.

"they're waiting for me. i should go."

you swallowed the disappointment, trying to keep your tone light. "of course. break a leg, i guess?"

"mm. you, too. with that studying."

"i will. promise."

"okay. happy birthday, y/n."

"thanks. talk soon?"

"yeah. we'll talk soon."

8:12 p.m.

your apartment is overly decorated and smells a lot like vodka. someone brought a disco ball, which was fine until they turned the lights out and suddenly your living room was an ocean of bright red dots.

it doesn't make sense, but there are only four people in your apartment, and the place has never felt more full. there are solo cups and snacks and an embarrassing amount of balloons and a birthday hat that you haven't taken off since the moment you walked through your bedroom door.

jae and sora are laughing together in the corner, while vivian is helping you organize the presents they piled around the couch. they got you a card. a few shirts. some chocolate and a set of fancy pens. the normal stuff.

and the night has gone well so far. no surprise guests, no weird incidents, just a good time and lots of laughter and the kind of smiles that stay on your face for a long, long time.

"sora! when is the food going to be ready?" vivian asks loudly, disturbing the happy couple in the corner.

jae rolls his eyes, mutters, "is the birthday girl even ready to eat?" and takes another swig of beer. sora stands and straightens her dress, heading toward the kitchen.

"food will be done soon." she gives him a look, then nods at the empty beer can.

"another one?"

jae shrugs. "just enjoying the celebration, love."

you're grinning. "he's a lightweight. why'd you let him drink two cans already—ouch. that was uncalled for. you can't hit the birthday girl!" you mutter, rubbing your side where he smacked you.

sora ignores the both of you and checks her watch, humming to herself.

"okay! v, help me set the table."

vivian follows her into the kitchen, muttering, "there's a whole man in there, and you chose me—never mind."

they disappear. you sit on the couch, smiling and a little drunk and a bit too happy.

you have this sudden feeling of gratefulness, the kind that feels warm and thick, making you blink fast, as though your vision is blurred.

your friends are here. you have a roof over your head. a sister who called to wish you a happy birthday and a mother who sent you money even though you told her not to.

you have a home, somehow, in the strangest of places. and sometimes you can hardly believe it, because, honestly?

seoul was the last place you ever imagined finding it.

when the clock hits nine, the doorbell rings.

you stare blankly for a second before standing up and padding over, opening the door and freezing.

karina is standing there. in a casual outfit at that. and in her hands a small, neat container.

"hi," she says, like it's normal. "happy birthday."

you blink. "what—um. you came."

"of course i did," she says softly. "i said i'd think about it."

you step aside to let her in, the room going quiet for a beat before vivian blurts, "is that karina?"

karina gives a small wave. "hi."

jae scrambles to sit up. "oh my god."

you glance down at the container. "what's that?"

"oh—" karina lifts it slightly. "strawberries. you said you liked them, remember?"

you do remember. that first shift she showed up at was just to get her bracelet fixed. something flutters low in your stomach. karina shifts beside you, a bit awkward now. "uh, so i didn't know if you guys were gonna have cake or—"

"it's okay, you can put that in the fridge," sora cuts in, emerging from the kitchen, her expression brightening when she sees her. "hey. come in, please. it's good to see you."

"a bit." karina looks embarrassed now. she glances around. "um, am i early?"

"nope. not at all. come."

sora gestures. karina gives you a sheepish smile, and you nod, taking the container and setting it on the kitchen counter.

"take a seat."

the seating shifts until somehow she ends up beside you, and it's awkward at first. it's not every day an idol sits at a dinner table with your closest friends. but then sora makes a snarky comment, and jae responds with an impression of your ta, and vivian gets cake frosting on her sleeve and screams—and things settle.

karina laughs a little too hard at your jokes. you see her stealing glances at you every time you talk. at some point she notices something across the table and tilts her head. sora and jae are close, their hands brushing and sharing drinks without thinking. when jae leans in to whisper something that makes sora laugh, karina's smile falters just slightly.

oh. she thinks. so they're...

her hand falls under the table. fidgets with her bracelet.

she feels like an idiot for spiraling over your roommates, who had a boyfriend and had no intention of ever being a thing with you. she doesn't realize until you touch her knee and lean in, speaking softly and quietly, asking if everything's okay.

she swallows. "yeah," she mumbles.

"you sure?" you say.

"mhm."

the conversation starts up again, and she stays mostly quiet, but when jae goes back to the kitchen to refill his drink, her voice rises, a question: "babe, do you want anything?"

sora looks away from vivian before yelling back. "beer, please!"

"same here," you yell after her.

jae grins. "on it. anyone else? karina?"

karina hesitates. "ah, no. no, thank you. i'm not much of a drinker."

"shame."

and she seems relieved when he disappears. like it was a weight lifted.

there is another long stretch of silence, the table quieter this time. your leg bumps into hers underneath. she smiles, glancing at the plate in front of her. then, the questions start.

"so, did you bring a present for y/n, or are you our present?" vivian asks suddenly, mouth full.

"oh—"

"that's gross," you cut in, rubbing her shoulder. "ignore her, she's weird."

karina laughs softly. "no, um, actually. i did bring you a gift."

you sit up, a grin spreading on your face. "you didn't have to."

"i know," she says, standing. "i wanted to, though."

she crosses the apartment and grabs a thin box, wrapped and tucked discreetly by the door. the wrapping is simple, a little clumsy, the tape crooked, and a corner sticking out. you watch, holding your breath a bit as she settles the present in front of you.

you look down.

then look back up at her.

"you got me a script notebook?"

she nods. her smile is slow, almost shy.

"for the next role you fall in love with."

later, when the plates are empty and the candles are melted and your friends start packing up, she taps your arm. "do you need help cleaning up?"

"we can handle it, thanks. you did enough coming over and giving the birthday girl her present."

"mm, that's fine. i should go anyway."

you stand, ignoring the curious expressions around you. "come with me." she does, letting you lead her to your room. she closes the door behind her.

you both turn.

"it's really cozy in here," she says, looking around. "smells like you too."

"what does it smell like?"

she inhales. then laughs, good. it smells good."

you smile and sink into the edge of your bed. "thanks for coming. really."

she sits beside you. "you didn't think i would?"

you shrug. "i wasn't sure."

"i wanted to," she says simply.

...

"i thought sora was your girlfriend," she blurts out. "that night. when she walked into your room."

you blink. "you—what?"

"i mean, you called her your person," she says, not quite looking at you. "and i don't know. i just assumed."

you tilt your head, smiling a little. "she's dating jae."

"i know now," karina mutters. "i just felt dumb."

"why?"

she exhales slowly. doesn't answer right away. "because i was jealous," she says quietly. "even though i didn't have a right to be. even though i still don't know what we're doing."

she meets your eyes. "but i don't want you to have a person. i want it to be me, y/n. only me."

something tightens inside you. you feel a rush of adrenaline, a warmth, and a deep ache that makes your whole body stiffen and then loosen all at once.

you can't think of the words, so you take her wrist and kiss it, your mouth trailing lightly against her skin, a question. "okay," you breathe, your lips pressed into her pulse. "okay. that's how i want it too."

a shaky breath. "good," she murmurs.

her hand trails up to the base of your throat. her fingertips graze along the hollow. she doesn't move. not at first, anyway.

you glance around her face, looking for a sign, an answer. something. then, your eyes meet.

"can i kiss you? please?" you whisper, more breath than actual sound.

"yeah," she murmurs back, just as softly.

your noses bump slightly at first, and you both laugh quietly, exhaling a soft puff of air between you. then she reaches up and gently curls her fingers around the collar of your sweater, tugging you forward like she's unsure if you'll actually do it unless she does.

the first brush is hesitant. sweet, gentle, nothing more than the two of you learning each other, seeing what feels good. but then karina pulls you closer, her other hand rising and sinking into your hair, and the angle shifts, and everything becomes a bit deeper, a bit hungrier.

she tastes faintly like strawberry soda—the kind sora brought earlier and had given her after dinner. you hum into her mouth, feeling the pressure build as the heat spreads from the tips of your fingers down to the soles of your feet.

karina parts her mouth. you deepen the kiss.

somehow, she ends up with her legs on either side of you. your hand slides under her shirt, fingers running over the ridge of her spine, and she shudders, tilting her head, a soft moan muffled by your tongue.

seconds later you pull away for air, and she chases your lips, her arms tight around your neck, her hair falling messily over her cheeks, a flush dusting her face, her gaze fixed only on you.

"karina," you gasp, squeezing her waist.

her mouth is swollen, her chest heaving, and her expression a mixture of stunned and dazed. she licks her bottom lip. you follow the movement and swallow hard.

"y/n," she murmurs, sounding a bit delirious.

she sways. "you okay?" you say, brushing her bangs back.

"yeah," she whispers, voice hoarse.

you nod, resting your forehead against hers and catching your breath.

"woah."

she doesn't reply, only lifts a hand and touches your cheek, a tentative caress. you turn and press a light kiss to her palm, a silent response, before meeting her eyes again.

she swallows, her thumb tracing a path along the slope of your nose.

"this was the best birthday ever."

"mm, is that why your heart is beating so fast?"

you look at her, smiling.

"no," you say. "that's because of you."

her eyelashes flutter. she presses her lips together before making a mock throw up noise at your cheesy comment. you laugh. she buries her face into your shoulder, muffling a small giggle, and the vibration goes straight to your heart.

later, when you come back out to the living room, vivian is still there, sprawled across the couch watching some action movie on her laptop. she looks up and squints at the two of you.

she raises an eyebrow but keeps her mouth shut, and you pretend not to notice.

thankfully.

you walk karina to the door. she doesn't try to leave at first. instead she leans into you subtly, a hand tucked in yours, and gives the place another once-over, a smile playing on her lips.

it takes her a while to realize you haven't said anything.

she blinks. "what is it?"

"i, uh." you clear your throat.

she waits.

"another?"

her eyes furrow at the lack of context, but with a few context clues—that being you looking down and her leaning a little closer—she knows exactly what you mean.

she nods, her head tilted, a strand of dark hair falling loose along her cheek.

you tuck it behind her ear, let your hand linger along her jaw, and then lean in.

there are footsteps from behind you. a thunk. someone yawning. the sink running, dishes clinking, a murmured curse, and—

—the water stops.

footsteps.

"hey, are we—"

sora freezes.

vivian sits up. "whoa. okay. why am i the one always left alone? this is a whole ass thing. am i a fifth wheel now? okay, i see."

"v..." you mutter.

"nope! go have fun, make out or something, don't mind me, just gonna stay here and watch this movie."

you groan and lean away. karina holds a hand over her smile, glancing between you and the rest of the apartment, and bites her lip. "uh."

"okay," you mutter, nodding. "right."

she lets go and reaches up, giving a half-shrug. her palms cup your face, thumbs sliding gently over your cheeks. "go to sleep. it's late, okay?"

you blink.

"yeah," she murmurs, lowering her voice, her tone amused.

"and... if you want to, um."

she trails off, then takes a breath, and looks at you with an almost shy, hopeful expression, and says, "i can call tomorrow."

"tomorrow."

you echo, and it sounds less like a question and more like a promise.

"okay," karina breathes. her fingertips brush your hair, her touch so delicate, and then she turns and opens the front door, and the moment ends, just like that.

vivian watches her leave, and the two of them exchange a glance, a pause, before she laughs.

"hey, wait," sora calls, before turning to you. "hold on. did i just interrupt your goodbye kiss or—" you walk past her and towards the hallway to your room.

"night!" you say loudly, giving her a quick wave before closing the door.

main masterlist. part one. part three.

[bytemee]

my doctor said i’m dying he said the only cure for it is for a person named byte to write a mean!sorority!karina fic..??? that’s so weird

right!!! what a weird fellow for saying that haha..

[bytemee]

byte everyone here misses mean!sorority!karina

literally i feel like a single mother on a road trip and all my children are asking me to take the exit to the mcdonald’s

[bytemee]

pr manager inbound

my career is going to flop

[bytemee]

give me the login I’ll upload part two on foenum

this just made me cringe bim 🥀

[bytemee]

you on your 15 minute break

layla go step onto a busy street

[bytemee]

My math teacher beat me in table hockey today.

1-7 🫩

imagine they did this to u afterwards

[bytemee]

your job is basically saying u belong in the kitchen and i will NOT stand for that.

everyone rise with me

let’s protest

[bytemee]

this u?

yes i am berry upset

[bytemee]

hey so you were supposed to umm...wake up from your netflix filled sleep and release part 2...

this isn't good for your return rate

hey so um my pto ran out and they made me work a double at my j*b

and i didn’t get home till almost midnight and now im abt to go back into. the stingzone 🥀

[bytemee]

i need mean!sorority!karina NOW. when i miss her i reread ur fics Lol.

hob so bunz

[bytemee]

mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen mean!sorority!karinaComebackWhen

STOP

[bytemee]

why did u literally cook on that new karina fic

thankyou 😛😛

[bytemee]

stop watching netflix and give us the pt2 TT

pt 2 later today heh

[bytemee]

has anyone ever wondered why we’ve never seen kamala harris and byte in the same room? something fishy is going on.

you’re ruining my night

[bytemee]

IM JUST HAPPY YOU RELEASED

i’m giggling and blushing just like that emoji