campbellhartley

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U is for the boxes never bothered to Unpack from the move home from Uni. Why bother to Unpack when I’m just gonna move out again? Geez, Mom.

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T is for Taxes and a reminder that seventeen and a half percent of nothing is still nothing.

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S is for Social Media that makes everyone else's life seem much more exciting than yours.

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R is a Reminder that you are an intelligent, qualified, sassy adult with a respectable degree and more than deserving of any employers time.

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Q is for your Qualification, and the realisation that no one in the real world gives a shit what grade you got, as long as you can do the job and only cry when people aren’t looking.

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P is for Procrastination. Because having a job is nowhere near as important as taking a quiz that will let you know your favourite sex position based on your choice of bread.

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O is for Overdraft. 

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N is for Networking.

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M is for Made, Manufactured, Moulded. A celebration of our positions on every Universities conveyor belt of new graduates.

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L is for those Lies told about the things you can and can’t do when starting a new job. Just say you can do everything! You can google it on the job and dry your nervous sweat patches on the restroom hand dryers later.

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K is for the Kids all of your friends from home started having while you were off at Uni learning that metal doesn’t go in the microwave.

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J is for the Jobs taken but not wanted. (Who ordered the skinny, semi-dry, extra hot latte with two and a half pumps of caramel, one sugar and a stone cold bitch face?)

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I is for the dog-chasing-it's-tail Irony of needing the job to get experience, but experience to get the job.

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H is for goin' Home. (It may not have any bangin' nightlife but I'll be damned if it's 3 Hairdressers, 5 Supermarkets and 8 Charity shops don't come in handy from time to time)

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F is for those family members that keep asking "so what's the plan now that you’ve left Uni?"

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E is for the constant Emails looking for work sent to people who don’t remember your name. FUN TIP: Keep emailing them until they know you as ‘that guy who won’t stop emailing us’. Theres no such thing as bad publicity.

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D is for D-E-B-T.