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justin timberlake: dirty babe, see these shackles baby i’m your slave, i’ll let you whip me if i misbehave
9 year old me:
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This is Miss Kitty. When I noticed she perfectly filled the shape of her bed, I realized it was time for a diet.
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“The best way to start your week off right? Have an orgasm.... or two.”
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HONESTY HOUR
Ask me literally anything and I’ll answer it
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straight woman im talking too: haha like.. idk he just ignores me and doesn’t like me and we have terrible sex haha but i love him tho!!!!!
me:

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[lawyer voice] mothers and fuckers of the jury-
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someone: that’ll cost you an arm and a leg
me:
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it feels like tumblr is reprimanding me
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