caninetaxidermist

[caninetaxidermist]

okay but as a non american who was raised in america in nj. new jersey isn’t this horrible shithive hellish boring place that people think it is like o grew up in jersey city and it was awesome man. sure we didn’t do tons of crazy crap everyday but it was enough cuz i could go outside look at the hudson river and all the adorable ducks and admire them with my sister and we could just laugh and smile genuinely and we had a real community hell we were friends with the building staff and we had the view of the statue of liberty right outside our window and it was fucking beautiful watching the sun rise and set. the day i had to move out and leave everything behind my bed my belongings my HEART the one place i could feel like i belonged was the worst day of my life

the worst part of being a non-american on the internet is statistically you're probably going to make a lot of friends who ARE american and then you start getting crazy thoughts like "i should take a vacation to buttfuck tennessee" or "i wish i could immigrate to new jersey"

[caninetaxidermist]

[caninetaxidermist]

so lame that rich people tend to just wear a lot of business casual. if i had infinite money id at least get a little creative with my appearance. get my teeth replaced with diamonds or get my ears pointed by a skilled plastic surgeon or something. cmon man.

[caninetaxidermist]

HOMESTUCKS AS BIRDS

Sollux: Crimson rosella Kanaya: Purple martin

June/John: Black-billed magpie Roxy: Galah

Karkat: Bleeding-heart pidgeon Dirk: Ornate Hawk-Eagle

[caninetaxidermist]

same hair

[caninetaxidermist]

7/15/2025 - 7/16/2025

[caninetaxidermist]

Empirically testing the efficacy of "reblog for good luck" posts by making posts which promise increasingly strange and specific positive outcomes and measuring whether this has any effect on the number of people as a proportion of total interactions who claim the good fortune in question indeed came to pass.

[caninetaxidermist]

🐝🐏 Sollux and Aradia are now available on Makeship!! 🐏🐝

The pre-order campaign will only be open for THREE WEEKS and is estimated to ship out around October, so nab them while you still can!

Check out the product pages to find more details!

[caninetaxidermist]

[caninetaxidermist]

Every time I see someone apologise for making a "long post" that's shorter than some of my individual sentences I'm like, look: Tumblr has the longest practical post length limit of any microblogging platform – why are we even here, if not to ramble?

[caninetaxidermist]

presenting: communism

[caninetaxidermist]

im so exhausted

[caninetaxidermist]

[caninetaxidermist]

how long has it been since my last homestuck fanart

[caninetaxidermist]

“I wish I could be a boy” You can

“I wish I could penetrate but I don’t have a penis” There’s a surgery for that

“I want to piss standing up” The surgery does that too, but also have you heard of an STP device? You should look into those

“I like the effects testosterone could give me but what if people think I’m ugly after I start” would you rather be happy and ugly or beautiful and miserable

“I want to cut my hair short and look more like a guy but everyone is begging me to not cut my hair” bestie, it’s your hair and they can go fuck themselves

“I wish I was born a boy” The best time to plant a tree was ten years ago, the second best time is today

“I wish I was a boy” I have great news for you

[caninetaxidermist]

Straight dudes who think women are some sort of a terrifying incomprehensible alien life force are both funny and kind of sad. Like bruh women are just people who have tits. Except the ones that don't.

Sometimes women are just people with tits, but without tits.