canvea - Tumblr blog

[canvea]

[canvea]

consider me disappointed that we didn’t get any hei briskeby, cengiz dancing/getting scared by the swan and more balloon squad bloopers

all in all too little sana too much julie

[canvea]

i dye my hair purple and i put a needle through my nose. i fix the computer that has sat broken for a week and i make everyone pancakes and coffee. i, of course, don’t have any. there’s way too much to be done. it’s 10 in the morning and i haven’t been to sleep yet but i decide to go running. now, i have never been a runner but i decide to start today because i finally have the energy. also, everyone has been telling me that exercise will make me feel better. i come home and i put blue lipstick on my lips. it makes me feel like the universe. so, i decide to get a tattoo instead of buying groceries. i deep clean my house though and you wouldn’t believe just how filthy it is behind the stove. i call everyone in my family - just to chat. i’ve been ignoring their calls for weeks now but today i feel like talking. i ramble so fast and i have such an excitement in my voice that certain words are spoken while i’m breathing in deep to catch my breath - it’s a lot like this sentence. i pick up smoking again. it’s better than an ativan habit, i rationalize to those that scold me when they see that orange glow at the end of my lips. i wish it were ativan. i want to shave my head. i hold the clippers in my hand but decide to write instead. i reward myself with a bottle of wine. it doesn’t mix well with my medication but i don’t care. now, i’m crying. i’m lonely. i have no one. i decide to go out with a friend. 30 minutes in, i want to go home. why did i do this? take me home. i don’t want to be here. i don’t say this, of course. i fall silent. they ask me if i’m okay and i yell. i come home and i don’t try to kill myself. but, i do pray to whatever and whoever is listening that they take me in my sleep. but, no one thinks that i need help. they applaud me for finally being productive and living life to the fullest instead.

smspoetry (bipolar)

[canvea]

I mean, who would she always call? Who did she look to for anything?

[canvea]

take me back to the night we met and then I can tell myself, what the hell I’m supposed to do? and then I can tell myself not to ride along with you.

[canvea]

Progress not perfection

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Walter is my cousin’s dog. He really has a thing for swimming.

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My mom’s bipolar.

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Josefine Frida Pettersen & Nikolaj Coster-Waldau featured in Zulu Comedy Galla’s video about the climate change

[canvea]

I want more!

#relatable Skam

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What do you suppose are the chances that Whittaker could convince Christopher Eccleston (as they’ve worked together before; ooh, and they’re both Northerners) to finally reprise his role as Nine? Maybe for a new Five Doctors special? Eccleston, Tennant, Smith, Capaldi, and Whittaker all bouncing off one another would be absolutely wild.

[canvea]

A legend.

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There are only two gifs you need to survive Tumblr

and

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Gives meet goosebumps EVERY TIME

(TWIN PEAKS: THE RETURN - PART 8)

[canvea]

Bobby when your father told me this, you were a very long way from where you are today.