captain-jonny-dville - Tumblr blog

[captain-jonny-dville]

A Step By Step Guide To Getting an Uncensored Tumblr App on iOS

Hey everyone,

So Tumblr has come out with a ridiculous banned tags list on iOS thanks to Apple. However, early this year Microsoft was trying to launch their Cloud Gaming on iOS and had a similar issue with Apple censors. Their solution was a browser version which utilises some of iOS’s in built systems. Interestingly enough, they also work with Tumblr’s browser. So here is a step by step guide of what to do;

1. Open Safari

2. Load the Tumblr webpage in Safari.

3. Tap on the share button

4. In the share menu, tap “Add to Home Screen”

5. Tap “Add”

6. You should be taken to the Home Screen where you will see a new Tumblr app. Open it.

7. Log in and enjoy.

I hope this helps people 😊 It isn’t perfect but it helps get round Apple censorship.

[captain-jonny-dville]

All the better to crush mens skulls with (and then scoop out and eat their brains)

jonny may not have ass but he DOES have thighs

Okay as much as I don't approve of this ass talk you're right and you should say it

[captain-jonny-dville]

read: brian gives the BEST most INVELOPING HUGS *EVER* and is a GREAT HIDING SPOT FOR WHEN YOUVE PISSED OFF ASHES BY CHEATING AT CARDS (they have no proof.)

Brian can open up and be worn like a suit of armour

Is this a pun about him being a mech, this feels like a pun

Also that would probably feel very bad for him, being worn sounds unpleasant

[captain-jonny-dville]

how DARE no one tag me

if you firmly believe cowboy cats would say meowdy hit that mf reblog

[captain-jonny-dville]

fuck you, it adds to the flavor!

Jonny can cook but is not allowed in the kitchen because he doesn't use the chef's knife property and have cut himself, bled all over the dish and then had the nerve to serve it anyway, multiple times.

[captain-jonny-dville]

req’d by @smallbirdrising

[captain-jonny-dville]

The original post kept getting longer and longer, so I'm starting a new one.

And we're starting it off right

By getting called the fuck out

RIP Tim Ledsam's legal ability to use tumblr

[#the actual reaction pic isnt even loading but yes these tags are all Valid #like gOSH look at this beautiful being #tim... sir... i have Feelings for you....... #his guitar riffs.... his voice... his hair..... aUGH #Tim Thirst Sundays are a blessing from space jesus himself #(yes tim IS in fact space jesus) #also that one tags abt him looking like goth!hozier.... yeah same hat #the mechs #people who would make me spontaneously combust if i met them in person #long post]

[#god. #the mechs #mr tim. mr gunpowder sir #can. can i have a little kiss? right on the lips? #i both wanna ********** tim and BE him #hes gender and sexuality! bundle package #anyways. hngh tim please ********* me #(i put random numbers of *'s so you dont get to decode them fuckers >:3)]

[captain-jonny-dville]

I've done nothing wrong. Except for all the atrocities. Besides that I'm innocent

[captain-jonny-dville]

dear followers today i offer you? him

[captain-jonny-dville]

[captain-jonny-dville]

what im saying is that jonny dville deserves a similar treatment to what james kirk got

[captain-jonny-dville]

All these mechanisms and none of them are coping

[captain-jonny-dville]

All the wiggling on stage as he sings? stimming. he dislikes the octokittens cuz what the *fuck* is that texture nevermind i dont care i hate it and if any of those fuckers tried to touch me with their hell texture? its blastin time. Actually really vibes w/ TS theyre best friends. They do echolalia loops together! Singing is a vocal stim. He goes nonverbal after shows because woops! used up all his talking for the day. Likes to vibe w/ Ivy and Infodump at each other. Sews all his own clothes so he can control the Texture™ and tightness (my mother was a tailor, but she never sewed me shit) likes hugging TS and Brian cuz theres no risk of *shudders* skin on skin contact.

post autistic jonny d’ville headcanons i’ll start

is sarcastic almost 100% of the time but can never recognize other people’s sarcasm. also he’s very bad at putting on a sarcastic tone so people think he’s being mean (which, to be fair, he is, but still–)

wears really heavy and chunky boots because the stims from them are so good. jump in place. stomp ur feet. hear them click when u walk. the BEST.

he does not know how to interact with neurotypicals. the other mechs have tried to explain and every time he just gives them the most terrified and confused looks before deciding its not even worth it to try.

doesn’t like letting his hair getting too long cuz it’s heavy and weighs his head down. the problem is haircuts are the literal worst. only lets nastya give him a trim when its at the point he can’t handle it anymore.

wearing many belts means pressure stim

becomes hyperverbal when having intense emotions. just. starts talking and doesn’t stop until he genuinely cannot breathe and then pushes himself a little further. he just needs to let out every thought in his head that he usually doesn’t verbalize.

yknow when youre overwhelmed and something that usually calms you is too much? yea, that’s how jonny feels when his mechanical heart beats just a bit too loud for his taste. usually it’s a nice white noise but sometimes its like “oh ok i am going to break something made of glass now to help me cope with this horrific noise.”

[captain-jonny-dville]

my take on the toy soldier! a lot of detail work went into this, so be sure to click and view it at full resolution!(:

[captain-jonny-dville]

he don't bite

[captain-jonny-dville]

Shitty Jonny D’Ville aesthetic: wow. what a gorgeous specimen. truly a fantastic bloke who’s never done anything wrong and certainly never committed any crimes. i bet he just walks down the street and people think to themselves. wow, who is that guy? i bet he’s a captain. no i’m not biased this is all being written from a place of objective fact. what do you mean this “reads like jonny d’ville wrote it”? 

[captain-jonny-dville]

sometimes a family can be an overdramatic cowboy, a dead russian princess, a sentient starship, an arsonist mob boss, an amnesiac archive, a prophet, the toy soldier, a murderous british infantryman, an anime protagonist, and a mad scientist and that’s okay