capybarad - Tumblr blog

[capybarad]

I don’t understand where all the libfems are at when porn is heinously racist. like libfems spend like 90% of their time condemning White FeminismTM and Supporting Women of ColorTM but have absolutely nothing to say about the millions of videos currently circulating on the internet of women being fetishised and stereotyped for their race in the most disgusting ways imaginable, bc they’re literally too scared to say a god damn word against anything that men enjoy

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Subpoena the Teenage Witch

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This woman is giving "discounted services" to mean able to provide a doctors note saying they struggle with anxiety and loneliness.

It’s interesting how people lament men’s loneliness and lack of social interaction, but the solution is always sex. Not friendship, not mentorship or family outings or partying or hobbies. Nope. Sex is the solution. Not only sex, but sex that is purely transactional and emotionless. 

What men are describing isn’t “loneliness.” Loneliness is what you feel when you have no one to lean on in times of struggle. Loneliness is what you feel when you’re in a good mood but have no one to go hang out with and have fun. 

These men are experiencing a lack of female validation (i.e., sex) which is the primary fuel for their self-esteem.

It’s one thing to be horny with no outlet. Masturbation, for the most part, solves that issue. The problem here isn’t men’s physical urges - it’s the psychological obsession with sex as a form of validation. Men don’t even consider themselves human if women don’t want to fuck them. And then they project this belief onto women (i.e., “women think undesirable men are inhuman!!”)

When you realize that your entire role in someone’s life consists of validating their existence, it’s a turn-off. This is why women are turned off by so many men, and yet men can’t figure out that their emotional reliance on women (and subsequent bitterness toward women for failing to sit upon that pedestal) is exactly what makes women not want them.

Also when the fuck did doctors get permission to prescribe womens bodies as therapy for men INSTEAD OF SENDING THEM

TO THERAPY

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it's so disgusting how prostitution is treated as uwu fun sexy. one time i mentioned to my friend how in late medieval europe many cities had municipal brothels, and she thought it was.....cool? until i was like "yeah, and sometimes the women were not allowed to leave!"

another time i was visiting a roman archeological site along hadrian's wall and there was a tavern, with a tiny side room that prostitutes used to receive clients. the guide treated it lightheartedly, but the reality was that the tavern owner kept one or more slave women who were available to be raped by roman soldiers for a fee. i could not imagine the misery that that room had contained.

but yeah prostitution is somehow sticking it to the puritans or whatever.

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hello everyone, safewords are merely a reflection of rape culture and if your partner screaming "no" and "stop" turns you on you have the mentality of a rapist 🤫

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the intellectually superior sex be like i have to go on a stabbing spree because i can't get a girlfriend

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(tiktok)

cool, calm and collected strongwoman queen, gabi dixson 👑 with the 330lbs per hand

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Liverpool PRIDE! We’re all getting a bit cheeky now, bringing same-sex attracted signs to a Pride march and all! This is genuinely daring. I love their smiles.

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Capybara Babies by LisaW123 on Flickr.

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you have seen, many times, the phrase love your body! and every time, like rainwater, it glides off you. not because you cannot love it - you mostly, like, tolerate it - but because of the word "your".

is this your body? when you were 11 you had to start shaving your legs because other girls found it gross you were hairy. when you were 12, you had to stop wearing v-necks because of your chest - people were staring. your mother didn't let you dye your hair. your first boyfriend makes you dress up in skimpy clothes for him, then hated when other people coveted you. what you wear and how you present determine whether or not people find you funny or annoying or arrogant. other people get to determine if you are pretty, a court of opinion so loud it blots any good intent.

when is the body yours? magazines and instagram and tiktok endlessly advising you to "take care of" (starve) your body as if it is a weed. you must hack and slash at it, defend yourself from its wanton desires. it is a shameful, greedy thing. it is more like an art piece. you are keeping it or being kept-in-it.

you try to language it to your therapist - it's not that you don't recognize yourself in the mirror, it's more just that the thing that is in the mirror - it isn't you. that's why it's so easy to take apart: you're vaguely aware of the shape, but it feels like you are an animal hiding in the back of this cavern, snarling.

obviously you're like stuck in it. it often hurts a lot, buzzes with pain and a strange numbness. so it is your body when it's painful. that makes sense. otherwise - how many times have you been told to save yourself (your body) for marriage. for someone else. you are just borrowing it.

love your body! is so funny. somehow, without meaning to, the phrase reminds you - it isn't you. you're just inside it.

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A cartoon by Will McPhail.

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One of the biggest ways young girls are exploited in the global South is via the “house girl” culture. I’m speaking on how it works in Nigeria as that is my experience but I know it happens all around the world.

“House girls” are domestic servants, usually late teens though I have seen girls as young as six or seven, employed by middle and upper class families. They do everything from cooking and cleaning to caring for the elderly and young children and get very little wages. Most times these girls never see a penny of their wages- it’s all sent to their families. In Nigeria, these girls tend to come from very impoverished families living in border towns and often times do not speak the language before being sent to these families that exploit them.

Due to their young age, lack of any family nearby or money, poor education, and Nigeria’s legal system, these girls are overwhelmingly subject to sexual abuse at the hands of their male employers. In fact there is a common trope in media of the “husband cheating with the house girl and replacing the “madam” of the house. And when these men impregnate these girls, they are sent back to their villages in shame while the cycle continues.

They also face lots of other abuse. One of my mother’s friends was a “house girl” in the 70s when she was just thirteen and she was only given mouldy food and left overs to eat for most of her childhood. she once told me of a time where she was so thirsty, she drank the dirty water her abusers had used to wash their hands. I have also seen “house girls” physically beaten by their abusers and subject to horrific punishments- once as a child I saw a very young girl forced to ride in the boot of a car while all the employers children threw their imported backpacks at her.

There have also been situations in which families immigrate and arrange to bring their house girls with them. They continue to abuse them and when these girls manage to break free, they face deportation and further exploitation.

Of course such experiences are usually less common but the hiring of house girls is not viewed as the exploitation it is. Some people, my parents included, seem to view themselves as saving these girls from their lives in the village where they would get married young and live in poverty with lots of children. But how is it saving them to deprive them of education and enslave them? It is said that it is easy to recognise a house girl: shaven heads, old and dirty clothes and a scarily small stature. They look nothing like girls who have been saved.

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ilta

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"Audre Lorde and friends" by Jean Weisinger

source: The Wild Good: Lesbian Photographs and Writings on Love, edited by Beatrix Gates