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Austin Powers is bisexual and you can't stop me from saying so. You just know he's down to shag any bloke, bird, or bean he can get on with. You know it in your heart, baby

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discuss.

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Seth Green as Scott Evil throughout the Austin Powers franchise

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they should make a new austin powers movie but like not tell anyone and tell people its like fast and furious 15 or whatever 

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I never forget to take my estradiol, baby yeah

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robbie: ”too shippy!” *immediately followed up by sportacus’ and robbie’s outfits, side by side* gee magnus is this your ‘subtle’ way of critiquing sportarobbie or what??? 

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The Lazy Dance takes place on Stephanie’s half-birthday, and when asked how she wants to celebrate, she says that she wants to have a dance party. So everyone gets together in town square and starts to practice their dance moves, when Sportacus shows up. He gets invited to Stephanie’s half-birthday party, but when she tells him that it’s a dance party, he gets really nervous because he doesn’t know how to dance. He tells the kids this, but they don’t believe him because he’s a superhero, and there’s nothing that a superhero can’t do. When the kids leave, he does a little out loud exposition to himself that Robbie overhears. Then Robbie dresses up as a dance instructor who offers to teach Sportacus how to dance. But he teaches him these really, really awful dance moves so that he looks stupid at the party so everyone will lose respect for him. The song is We’re Dancing. When Sportacus gets to the party, he performs the dumb dance moves, but the kids teach him some their own dance moves so that he doesn’t look like a complete fool, and their innocence once again trumps Robbie’s evil plans.

this would’ve been HILARIOUS??

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Wayne's World (1992)

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Mr. Powers, my job is to acclimatize you to the nineties. You know, a lot’s changed since 1967. No doubt, love, but as long as people are still having promiscuous sex with many anonymous partners without protection while at the same time experimenting with mind-expanding drugs in a consequence-free environment, I’ll be sound as a pound!

↳ Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997)

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AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY dir. Jay Roach 

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Meeting and Dating Austin Powers

(Not my gif)(requested by @jotaro-spengler )

(The meeting headcanons are meh but I tried)

- Like most of the people he’s dated, you and Austin first met as colleagues. Dr. Evil was at it again and it was decided that you were the best one for the job. That’s how you found yourself standing with Basil waiting for the international man of mystery to arrive so that you could start your mission.

- Of course you’d heard stories from your coworkers about him but nothing could have prepared you for what walked through the doors of your base. You felt like a bunch of cameras were going to come out any second and admit that this was all just one big joke. Sure he was from the 60s but come on.

- So yes, Austin was definitely an... interesting individual, to say the least.

- As per usual the instant Austin saw you he began to flirt with you. Pet names, innuendos, blatant propositions; you know the drill. That was when you realized this mission was going to be a long one.

- You were pretty exasperated when you first started working with him but over time you started to find him kind of endearing. His antics became funny rather than annoying and he could be surprisingly sweet at times. It seemed his mojo was beginning to have an effect on you.

- Austin is a self proclaimed casanova but that doesn’t mean he can’t be monogamous for the right girl, and guess what. You’re that girl. He’s absolutely in love with you so much so that it feels like he’s lost his mojo. Occasionally he’ll get tongue tied and flustered around you but you rarely notice since, well, Austin is not the sharpest tool in the shed.

- The two of you had some free time one night so he decided to go all out and try to woo you. Burt Bacharach, candles, roses, a romantic ride on a luxurious boat. It was beautiful and it really made you fall for him.

- After the two of you sat and talked for a while, he pulled you into a slowdance and confessed his true feelings for you. It wasn’t the most articulate confession but it was good enough for you and you were happy to return the sentiment.

“You’re special baby.... I mean I really like you.”

“If you want me to be a one woman man, well that’s just groovy baby.”

- The two of you shared your first kiss under the stars with live piano playing in the background and his arms wrapped around you. Ever since then the two of you were the grooviest couple on earth, no matter what decade you were living in.

- A lot of pet names and terms of endearment. Things like baby, darling, my love, etc.

- PDA. You’re drowning in it.

- Lots of compliments. He thinks you’re shagadelic and smashing and he is going to let you know.

- Helping him adjust to the nineties. You introduce him to a lot of new things.

- Playing twister.

- Dancing together.

- Going for late night drives together.

- Groovy photoshoots. He has so many pictures of you.

- Getting tipsy together in hotel rooms. He never takes advantage of you even if he wants to kiss you as much as you want to kiss him.

- He can always make you laugh even if a lot of his jokes don’t land.

- He looks over at you when he makes a joke and no one laughs. You either give him a silent look of disappointment or reassurance.

- Cuddling with your head on his chest and his arms wrapped around you.

- He sleeps in the nude so be prepared to see him walk butt ass naked into your kitchen or bathroom in the mornings.

- Going on missions together and helping him go undercover or get information.

- Giving him the chance to say three puns before you tell him it’s enough and move on with your mission.

- Trying to stifle a laugh at his antics, the situations he gets himself into and his chest hair.

- Asking him to tell you stories about the past. Sometimes he’ll get carried away and start to tell you about a girl he shagged before awkwardly trying to change the subject once he realizes what he’s saying and who he’s saying it to.

- Can you resist his mojo? Can he resist yours?

- Before the two of you started dating it was very easy to trick him with your flirting and teasing. You don’t know how he’s survived for so long when he’s so easily distracted by attractive women.

- Helping him get his clothes off because god knows he isn’t able to do it himself 90% of the time; not without struggling for a good minute and a half.

- Making sure he doesn’t beat up old women or say everything he’s thinking. Let’s just say you’re the more rational and levelheaded one in your relationship.

- Helping him get out of dangerous situations.

- Him trying to proposition you and make a move at the worst possible times.

“Does that make you horny?”

“Not now austin!”

- Pretends to get stuck in your cleavage.

- Getting some of his world famous massages.

- Cat and other animal impersonations. They’re weirdly cute.

- Getting some 60s clothes of your own. His jaw drops when he sees you in them for the first time.

- Hand kisses.

- Playing chess.

- Him protecting you with his judo chops.

- Stealing his different lines. He won’t say it but he thinks it’s cute when you do.

- Teasing each other.

“Oh behave~” “Not if I can help it!”

- Most of the time he has a very unappealing way of saying things so don’t expect a lot of eloquent or romantic suggestions/comments.

- He always reassures you when you get jealous. Even if half the world wants to shag him he’s always going to choose you.

- When he’s jealous he gets passive aggressive. He’ll be sarcastic with you and pout to himself, not caring about anything else in the moment even if you’re on a dangerous mission.

“Why don’t you go and shag him.”

- Be nice to him he’s sensitive.

“Okay, I get it, I have bad teeth.”

- He’s quick to guilt. He always feels really bad when he upsets you and tends to go out on late night drives to think before he tries his best to apologize.

- He’s actually a sap. He surprises you with sincere and romantic confessions, especially after he’s messed up or you almost lose each other.

- Daddy issues. Be prepared for his father to flirt with you.

- His family reunions/get togethers are...interesting. You don’t know how to feel sitting across from your organizations ex nemesis while your father in law cuts up the Christmas ham.

- Any kind of kiss coming from you is a good kiss. They always put a smile on his face.

“Oh behave~”

- Traveling back in time with him.

- Visiting the shag pad.

- Going with him to his movie premieres.

- Even though he’s known as a playboy he’s actually really sweet and can easily grow attached to certain women. Years could pass without him seeing them or they could have never even dated in the first place and he’d still be hung up on them even after all that time spent apart.

- You’re everything to him even if you don’t feel like it sometimes what with all the women trying to shag him.

- He definitely wants to marry you as soon as possible. He’s especially excited for your honeymoon;)

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movies that shaped me - austin powers: international man of mystery (1997)

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Austin Powers: International Man Of Mystery (1997)

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i hate that i know exactly what scene they are referring to

Austin Powers from Austin Powers is going to super hell for bi crimes!!!

requested by: @44-caliber-lxveletter