cassanderx

[cassanderx]

"Matty, what would we say? Shift in front of them? It's fine to let it be. They can continue on thinking we're great. We're fine. The perfect kids, whatever the hell they want to tell their friends." Cassander had no intent on ever being truthful with them. He'd lived his life for them, to be a good kid, a good son, a good student – he was happy being selfish. Things done for himself had taken on a whole new meaning as of late, despite the fact that the man that turned him was a fucking wreck. Another thing he had to deal with. "Feel the same about what?"

"You haven't thought about telling them?" He wants to pump the brakes on the whole thing because that's an entirely new thing that they should probably get at, too. It really sinks in there with Cass on his couch how much there really isn't any reason to go back. As distant as he'd gotten over the years, he'd been decently compliant. Showed up at Christmas, some events, did at least a phone call a month. "I told them I was moving before I headed here. Mom asked why I'd go back to somewhere where something attacked me." Clara had been there for him that night at the hospital the night Alek bit him. Matteo remembered her asking if he had anyone to call, he'd called his roommate, not their parents. "I don't know, Cass. It's easier than admitting I don't think your stick in the mud little brother doesn't feel the same anymore." It's not petulant or finger pointing, Matteo's more tired than anything. There wasn't any going back, there was only going forward.

[cassanderx]

There was an abundance of twinks in attendance at the gym as of late. This was just yet another one who clearly couldn't tell up from down, or maybe just a knot hungry eladrin, Cass could never be too careful with those. Either way, he had turned up the music so he didn't have to hear the labored breaths coming from Elias, "Sorry, your panting over the other guys and your five pound weights were really distracting. But from one six to another, lighten up. Frowning will give you wrinkles. It won't be pretty with your bone structure." Cassander rubbed between his eyebrows, "I can already see some right there. Might wanna be careful."

who?: @cassanderx where?: full moon fitness, twink-off in front of the dumbbells

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Elias liked Full Moon Fitness a lot. It made him feel superior to work out there in his new eladrin body. The ego boost he got from showing off how much hotter he was than any lycan kept Elias floating for days after a good pump. Sure, it felt okay to show up some of them in strength, but he didn't treat his body like a temple for his health. It was all about grabbing attention and stirring envy, however the mental clarity he got out of his reps did help him with his control. Everything was heightened and Elias easily lost himself in the newfound depth his ears could pick up from the songs on his workout playlist. Gym time was the only time the noisy, overstimulating world melted away, unless he got distracted. Someone's lame music taste interrupting his pump certainly qualified. "God, how is anyone supposed to get into a rhythm with your shitty songs bleeding through your cheap-ass earbuds?" he snaps, dropping his weights to sit up on the bench in a huff. As Elias rips his headphones off, one prevailing thought resides in his head. Yeah, I'm way hotter than him, he thinks, giving the inconsiderate lycan a judgement-riddled once over. "Like sing in your head, or just stop being poor. A six like you shouldn't have so much audacity."

[cassanderx]

Cassander tilted his head to look at Carmine, trying not to laugh, "You think people come in here to get fit?" Everyone knew Serkan got railed upstairs, but they pretended to ignore it to let the man have a semblance of peace. And free memberships. "What, you don't want to go for it?" The dude looked like if the wind blew too hard, he'd fall over. Ass up, probably.

a starter for @cassanderx,

Carmine was a hater first, a volatile second, and a person third so when he walked into Full Moon Fitness, the Malice gifted the other with the fattest grimace the Malice could muster. "I guess I just don't really see the point," sure, gymbros turned lycan had to keep up with their hobbies, but Carmine had to wonder what lifting weights would do for a wolf anyhow. This was also coming from the guy who was shaped like a literal stick, but there was no need to point that out, "But if this will help everyone think they have a chance at winning alpha status," that caused a flicker of amusement to spark on Carmine's face.

[cassanderx]

It wouldn't be a bad sight, but Cassander was nothing but a horny dog, so he didn't comment on it. Or give Markus the joy of hearing it. "A non-lycan?" Cassander figured it would go to shit, or something like that. Why would they let non-lycan's compete? "The rules around here are ridiculous. It'd probably be broken up or something, we'd have to make more packs and it'll be an endless cycle. Didn't know witches were so interested in lycan politics. What if a non witch becomes your sovereign?"

"Is that what you want? To see me on my knees?" That was surprising, and in that statement alone, Cassander had to be joking. "It's probably a nice sight, I can't blame you," the lycan stood so Markus did the same, closer than was necessary as he looked down at the pixie boy who'd fallen into this mud pit. "what happens when a non-lycan wins anyways?" It'd be more convenient if the pack was forced to do what he said.

[cassanderx]

JANNIK SCHÜMANN 2022 | ph. by Maximilian König

[cassanderx]

"Commoners," Cass couldn't help but laugh, watching the witch stretch out like he was wasting precious time standing here. His gaze followed the other's out to the yard, where plenty of lycans were wrestling about thinking that they would be the next one to hold the title. Cassander didn't hold any such thought; he'd rather have fun than hold any responsibility. Maybe he'd have more fun if he shot Markus down a few pegs, anyway. "No witches, or maybe witches have to come around here only on their knees." He stood up now, giving Markus an amused look, "And beg to hang out with the dogs. You done, now? Or do you prefer the company? Maybe you should throw your shirt in with the lycans. Compete a little."

"I figure it's good to spend time with the commoners, let them know that I don't think I'm any better than the rest of them." Markus stretched as he said as much, joking in the fashion that while he didn't think much of the title, he absolutely did not consider the majority of them his equal. "What's going to be your first motion as alpha?" Markus asked, good naturedly as the lycans brawled in the background. "I wouldn't miss it for anything, plus I think it's expected for us to be here for it." Soon Lupercal would open its doors to Rome and invite everyone in to see how much it had grown, how their population had swelled, and just how many teeth were ready to bite down.

[cassanderx]

Cassander wrinkled his nose, watching Valamir for a few more moments. It was unfortunate that the lycan felt like the only one that would perhaps do something for the other, but that was Valamir's fault anyway. For now, though, Cass rolled his eyes, "Right, because your sparkling personality makes you really likable, too." He was sure that no one but Cass would find Valamir one day, dead in his own piss and beer. It was already happening, really. "So you think. Whatever. Take a fucking shower. Enjoy your Christmas gift."

Fishing around in his pockets, Valamir found the roadie he'd brought for the walk home. A calloused hand twisted the cap off before he brought the warm beer to his lips, Alpha, that was a funny one. "People don't like me and I don't like people, it's a good thing we have going." Cassander complained too much, this coming from a guy who hadn't stopped complaining since he got here. "Everybody wants to be Alpha." Valamir stumbled a bit as he momentarily thought about the time he spent in that role, the person he'd been and the life he'd led. Hadn't made him happy, then again nothing really seemed to do that. "I'll just keep drinking, seems this place is doing just fine without one."

[cassanderx]

Cassander went to the gym often. It was sometimes to work out, mostly to work out, but otherwise, he just checked everyone else out and made sure there was room in the hall closet for whatever he and someone else wanted to do. He knew Serkan had planned that out purposefully, anyway. "If it isn't our emissary." It was a bummer none of the lycans knew how to communicate well, so much that they had one from a witch and all of that. "Enjoying your new title?" He picked up another sweet treat, because carb-loading was a thing, he supposed. All the workout videos he watched told him that. Pretending to workout was more difficult than actually doing it. "You know it. I'm always here for emotional support for the losers." He wasn't a leader, Cass definitely wasn't an alpha, either. "Going to enjoy the show?"

@cassanderx location: festival grounds notes: meetcutemeetcute Iced coffee was on the list of things that Markus had discovered in this age thanks to Bastien's intervention. Despite all the snow, he still had one in hand; preferring to suffer through the elements rather than give up something he'd only recently discovered. Rome had changed and shifted to a point where there'd be nearly no one left who remembered him from his lifetime before, nearly no one. While his brother was being bold out in the streets, like so many other more nefarious individuals, Markus had saddled up in Lupercal. He'd even secured a position for himself, emissary to a bunch of dogs, how thrilling.

"Let me guess," Markus pointed as he raised his brow towards the other, "training to be the next Alpha?"

[cassanderx]

Cassander was used to Valamir being, well, Valamir. He was more than used to picking him off the ground, reminding Cass that, well, there was hardly anyone but himself he could rely on. Matteo was here, but he wasn't part of the Lupo, and everyone within it seemed to be at a loss. Luberfest was coming up, they all had to make it out alive and not pregnant, so that was that. "Yeah, you're isolated because so many people want to find you, right?" He waited a few moments, "You going to be Alpha or drink until you pass out again?"

"You know, you're alright kid." Valamir said as he stumbled along, biting Cassander hadn't been something the lycan had intended to do but here they were. At least the guy wasn't trying to rip his throat out, that'd be funny. "Suits me just fine." He liked where he lived, it meant that people usually didn't show up there trying to bother him.

[cassanderx]

Cassander watched Matteo for a minute, knowing his parental issues were loud and clear to his brother. Perhaps he'd gotten the easy part, but then again, Cass was far from perfect. He was good at what he wanted to be good at, easy to pretend and enjoy what it was he had gotten in life. Though while he was all to human once, Valamir's mistake had allowed him to really be free. That's clearly what his brother needed. "Do you care enough to be what they want you to be? We're not going home for Christmas, we can't tell them what happened – so why are you still using them as an excuse?"

"They just don't-" It feels a bit like falling into a trap, talking about the whole thing out loud. He'd tried the whole therapy thing once, maybe a couple of times. There were a lot more mommy issues there than he'd like to admit. But admitting them to a trained professional was one thing, to his brother was another. Sitting up straighter and sighing heavily, he figures they kind of need to talk about this eventually. "I just don't think I'm ever going to be enough for them, no matter what I do. I've got bigger problems now." Like the apparent apocalypse and everything that came along with it. "This is kind of home, I think I'd like it to be." And with Cass there, maybe it really could be. Maybe they weren't meant to be just brothers, maybe they were meant to be in the same pack, too. Be a part of all of that jazz together.

[cassanderx]

[cassanderx]

"You awake yet?" Cassander tried not to laugh, but his drunk "dad" of a sorts was something that he dealt with often. It was nearly Christmas, Cass was always willing to be let down by another brother figure in his life, so he waited for Valamir to stand up. "Your four wheeled trash can is the other way. Come on." He waited now as Valamir stumbled along, and while Cassander never expected anything from the lycan, he at least had stuff for him, "I got you a stocking full of booze. So you can pass out in your white trash manor."

"Yeah. Lycans." Valamir laughed at that, swaggering a bit as he used Cassander to support some of his weight. The kid was good, useful; gratitude wasn't something that the King would care for or expect, his own transformation hadn't been kind. It wasn't a gift, there was a reason why people called this shit a curse. "Fuck's wrong with you." Valamir's back hit the wall and the back of his head followed before his big hand moved to rub at the spot where it had abruptly struck the bricks. He pushed off the wall, steady towards what he hoped was his trailer, unless a park bench appeared first.

[cassanderx]

"This is home for me," Cassander figured he should clarify that. There wouldn't be a family reunion, nothing that said anything about him going back with the perfect little family and the idea that it would be exactly picture perfect. Cass had given that up a long time ago, and now he was looking at Matteo with the same sort of expectation. "There isn't anything there for me. And I don't know what's there for you, but nothing you'll be happy about considering you wanted to blame everything on our parent's expectations."

"Isn't the appeal going outside in the wilderness?" He's sort of avoiding the question, but he doesn't quite think too hard on it. It's maybe something he needs to sit down and talk about with other deltas. Granted he doesn't know that many, there's Dante with his guitar and snark and there's the guy who'd saved him in the woods and during the apocalypse. "I don't know, not yet. Which I know sounds like I'm waffling." It's been almost a year since he'd been in town. "I'm not worried about going home anymore, there's that at least. Not that I don't think it's an option, I just don't think it's all that interesting in comparison." What was he supposed to do, go back to an office job? One he'd been very passionate about, but still.

[cassanderx]

Jannik Schümann as Karl in ‘Deine Farbe/Your Color’

[cassanderx]

Cass followed him further in, picking up a little trinket and setting it down again once his curiosity was satisfied. “What, hoping to go home for Christmas?” The thought was laughable, but he didn’t say that as he looked at Matteo again. His curiosity was peaked, and he sat down on the edge of the couch, “You looking to join the Lupo finally?” He followed his brothers gaze, knowing exactly what he was thinking, “If you put up a tree, how many of these assholes are gonna piss on it?”

"Shits been weird since I got here." Matteo repeats as he leads his brother further into the cabin and rather unceremoniously perches himself down into the corner of the couch. "I'm alright though, all things considered." If Cass was alright, that's what mattered. Cass and Alek and the pack that he wasn't even technically a part of but was so attached to now. They were alive and they were just....This was what was left now, the everything else. It'd been a while since he hadn't been worried about growing tensions. "I guess we have like, the holiday to consider." Blinking, he looks away from his brother to a space in the corner where he could totally fit a tree. "Doesn't feel real. Isn't that insane? We went through all of that and this is the part I can't believe, planning Christmas."

[cassanderx]

Cassander mumbled a bit more to himself, but Valamir was heavy, and he nearly snapped another thing but couldn’t bring himself to do it. “Yeah, you know what kind of shit they leave on the floor here?” He didn’t want to know all of it, but he knew enough as the breeze of the outside air finally hit them. The reason for Valamir’s drinking tonight could’ve been anything, sure, but Cassander didn’t press as he pushed the lycan against a short wall, one that overlooked the river and canal, “You good?”

Bleary eyes looked up from his place on the floor as the thrumming music resounded about the bar. The kid was looking at him again, expectant and disappointed but he probably had a point. All Fours was no place to spend the night so as Cassander snapped his fingers in his face Valamir rolled onto his side before he managed to hoist himself onto his feet. "Fuck this place is nasty." His clothes stuck to the floor as he got up and swaggered in place, loosely slinging an arm around Cass' shoulders as he did. "Alright, lets go."

[cassanderx]

The memories were fading, as much as they could. There had been a chance for Cassander to get away, a chance where he'd found Matteo. It'd been too soon after that he'd relived the pain of dying. His skin burning, his body melting from the inside – it was probably for the best that he didn't have to remember. Getting an arm full of Matteo, however, was a surprise. He couldn't blame him, despite the way that he sighed and gave him a pat on the back. That was the only way he didn't have to worry about it; Matty was alive, he was here, and that was all that mattered. "Shits been weird since I got here." The pack was without an alpha, Cass wouldn't be one to step up for it, but he wondered if it was in Matteo's big dreams to be alpha. "How are you, then?"

Person: @cassanderx Location: Matteo's Place He couldn't remember them ever being too touchy, Matteo couldn't even remember the last time his mother had hugged him. When he'd graduated university maybe. But the moment he throws open the door and sees Cassander on his doorstep, he's quick to embrace his elder sibling, not unlike the other had done to him back on that balcony. He'd forget it, they'd had it easier from what he'd heard which was a horrifying thought to have. "Don't make it weird." He all but mumbles, every bit the kid younger brother as he pulls away and steps back to let him into the house.