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And Pygmalion prayed to Hephaestus, Coppersmith, Renowned Artificer, god of the forge and stonecarving, and prayed that his ivory sculpture may be brought to life.

But Hephaestus, Cunning, Clubfoot, stayed his hand; “I will not allow this,” he said. “To destroy thine handiwork would be contrary to my nature. For great craftsmanship shall last forever, while flesh will falter in time. In stone, she will have beauty that is everlasting, endless and immortal.”

Then Pygmalion prayed to Aprodite and said, “Can you please bring my sculpture to life? Your husband said no,” and lo; Aphrodite had the chance to do something hilarious.

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What are your best animal training fails?

Mine:

- when I was teaching my dog Pinkman to boop she thought she was getting food for hitting her head on things so for like two full weeks she ran around indiscriminately smashing her face into walls and furniture and then asking for a treat

- trying to teach my baby horse Nugget to bow but now he’s just constantly checking his armpits for food

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"God never gives you more than you can handle" is survivorship bias. People who got more than they could handle are dead.

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Advertising peaked at the Discovery channel “Boom de Yada” commercials

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As AI art gets harder to clock, I feel like we are going to need to have a discussion about attribution and it's probably going to bum some people out.

Because the surest way to avoid platforming, reblogging, or encouraging AI art posting is to know where every image you share originated and that's 1) boring, tedious research and 2) extremely limiting in what you feel you can reblog. But if unattributed images never gets traction, people will start attributing their images.

I've been guilty of this in the past, but for a while now it's been my policy that if I can't verify the origin, I don't share the image. That goes for stuff like screen grabs of headlines too -- more than once I've avoided spreading misinformation by saving a post to research before I reblog, then seeing the post refuted before I've been able to verify it.

And I usually try to attribute photos I take -- case in point, the "woman with shrimp" post gets a lot of attention but not one comment about it being AI, despite it being pretty similar to something you'd get from an AI. That's because I clearly state it's in a museum and link to its catalogue page.

I'm not saying this to scold anyone -- I think yelling at the Internet to cite its sources is very much a losing game -- but because I don't see this discussed much. We're such fertile ground to be fooled by AI art because we've grown accustomed to not questioning the origins of any given image. And of course I also want to encourage both OPs to attribute their images and rebloggers to verify unattributed ones.

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I, for one, like Roman numerals.

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Llamas wearing hats

"I did it for you" has gotta be my favorite form of betrayal. You gave me a gift I never asked for, and now I have to look around at the world you destroyed with the knowledge that it was gift wrapped and addressed to me.

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LMAO

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Sad Bastard Expectations

It's 2025, and we're sadder than ever!

Maybe it's time for a Sad Bastard Cookbook sequel? Maybe a spin-off for parents of small children? Maybe both?

I'm new here. What's a Sad Bastard Cookbook?

Glad you asked! We wrote a cookbook full of judgement-free recipes you can make when you're suffering from mental illness, physical disability, poverty, or anything else late-stage capitalism throws up that makes basic self-care feel impossible. Some of the recipes were our own, some we collected from the community.

The ebook is free--you can download a copy here if you wanna check it out.

I'm a community! Or at least, a Person! Can I contribute my recipe for survival food?

YES PLEASE.

If you have a survival recipe that you make for yourself, or to feed a baby, toddler, or small child, please share that recipe here.

I’m a fan of the original Sad Bastard Cookbook—when will the new ones be here?

We really have no idea. We’re in the very early planning and writing stages of the two projects, but when we have more information, you’ll probably see it here first!

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More like:

1. Scandalized mother trying to be responsible while laughing

2. Devil-child with a lit box of matches in his right hand to distract you from the bear trap he's planting with the left

3. Autism (loud variety)

4. Barbed wire (loud variety)

5. Asshole

Hey all what do you think about this

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you probably don't know callmekevin but he would HATE this account (he is a certified soup hater)

This ask has soup in it!! Very good.

Ye i don't know who that is but how dare he!! Evilevil

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I would suggest an autoimmune condition like multiple sclerosis (its more or less treatable though, which may cause problems), or Huntington's disease (an inherited disease that gets progressively worse each generation), or a chronic CNS infection like cerebral tb or neurosyphilis (neurosyphilis has three variants, one of which is called general paresis of the insane). I dont know what would suit your exact story better.

If you're okay with a shorter time course, you could for either some variant of Creutzfeldt-Jacob disease, or for a Naegleria Fowlerii infection. Both of these are rare, progress rapidly to death over a couple of months to a year or two, and are basically incurable.

ok im just gonna throw this out here in case anyone has enough relevant medical knowledge to advise!

some of u might remember the robot story i shared a while back (not the one i published in the magazine, the other longer one).

i've been keeping the medical stuff in the backstory vague but i'm wrapping it up now and so far one reader has said they found it a bit confusing so if possible i'd like to come up with an actual medical explanation. if not possible then if anyone asks i'll chalk it up to the story being set in the future.

basically one of the characters in the story:

suffered a brain injury so severe that it left them high support & in need of 24 hour care

the brain injury is stated to be due to an unspecified illness rather than an accident

it's implied to have been some kind of long term illness rather than a single event as they had multiple brain scans taken tracking their progress. the pre injury brain scan is integral to the plot.

can anyone come up with a real world scenario that fits this?

the alternative is to go w it being a single event and come up with a handwave for why he'd had brain scans taken previously but i'm reluctant to have to add more exposition.

ETA: ALSO if anyone who read the story when i shared it here remembers whether or not this bothered them that would also be helpful (no worries if not i realise it's been a few months) (once again this isn't the published piece w the robot child it's a different project w different robot)

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I spent a lot of time handcuffed and in a cage in high school, for a charity bit the grocery store I worked at would do

the bit was that I was "put in jail for having too big a heart" and customers could donate to my bail to get me out (and the money would go to a children's hospital or something)

now. I was very clearly a teenaged employee handcuffed inside a large cage. and I would honestly tell people that I had been in there for hours. and people would say, that's terrible! that's awful! and I would show them my wrists red from the tight handcuffs, and say but I'm sooooooo close to making bail.

and then they would dump some cash in the basket, I'd thank them, and they'd walk away.

and every so often, one of the managers would come by and collect some of the cash, so I could keep being soooooo close to making bail.

I was very good with this bit. Parents with small kids would pay $5-10 if I told their children I had been placed in jail for not cleaning my room/doing my homework, etc. For people in their 20s, I'd threaten that I was very bad at playing the harmonica, but I WOULD play it and we'd all suffer unless they paid me. and for the most amount of money, older men in suits would almost always pay $20s if I avoided eye contact and stammered a lot.

eventually, the managers started to feel bad because I was in the cage so fucking long and often, that I'd need someone to brace me when I got out because I'd have no feeling in my legs. wobbling like a newborn giraffe.

but I would also rake in at LEAST $100 an hour in charity.

so they were like, hey champ. can we, uh, give you a pillow to sit on. in the cage. would you like a pillow so you're not just sitting on a cold metal slab. can we give you a pillow.

and I had to explain to them that if they gave me a pillow, people would think I was more comfortable, so they wouldn't feel as bad, so I'd bring in less money.

the compromise was that they'd bring me a nice coffee every couple hours, which I would have to try to block with my body from the customers.

all this money went to charity. that's what the money was for. it's what was on the sign. but how much they were willing to pay was very contingent on how comfortable I looked, never mind the fact that I was still a teenaged employee handcuffed inside a cage.

and out of the dozens of shifts I did this on, not ONCE did ANYONE say, hey kid I'm going to go talk to your manager because what the fuck is going on here. they would just drop money in the basket, and I'd thank them and sip from my secret drink.

I actually had people get MAD at me that I told them I was far away from bail, they donated like $15, and then 20 minutes I got let out because my shift ended.

again. the money was for charity. it was on the sign that was very clearly placed on the upper half of my cage.

so yeah. even when people think they mean well. people can be really, really fucking stupid.

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s/o to this skeleton babe from 1936

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About ten, fifteen years ago I wrote a story about a guy living in a Capitalist dystopia. His walls, furniture, and tableware are all covered in smart displays. Basically animated wallpaper. It's sold as being able to turn your room or objects into anything - A nice forest view, outer space, a fantasy realm... but the companies that run this stuff keep sneaking ads in.

It gets so bad he's always being woken up by adverts that offer insomnia cures and better bedding that play when he tries to sleep.

So he buys the ad-free tier, and it's great... for a few months. And then he starts getting adverts from 'premium partners'. So he goes up a level... and the same thing happens.

So he jailbreaks his wallpaper and sends all the ad servers to 0.0.0.0 and voila... he can sleep.

Until this SWAT team blows his door off and drag him off to jail. The Ad companies are suing him for loss of revenue for the products he' notionally have bought if he'd watched their adverts, based on some weird 'The average consumer buys X products with an average value of Y' calculation.

The judge is like 'well I dun wanna annoy the sponsors' so he RICO's this guy's house and possessions and sends him to jail.

... which is a nice relaxed non-volent offender jail for the corporately disenfranchised. But because these people have no money... there's no ads and now he's happy because the only place he's free... is in prison.

Which at the time was a bit much and now it's like: Called it.

Elon's suing companies for not advertising because he's losing revenue. He's also cranking the price of Ad Free Twitter. Disney and Amazon play adverts on their paid service when services used to be free because of the adverts... and now you have to pay to watch the adverts or go up a couple of tiers.

And google's going around freaking out about ad-blockers.

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Throwing this out there: is it unsolvable

Every zoombini can only sit next to zoombinis with whom they share at least one feature. The seats are arranged diagonally so each zoombini must have similar zoombinis on all sides.

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[2 METHODS

Looking at people, observing and recording their behaviour was a method Desmond Morris had pioneered to obtain information on how common and widespread certain behavioural reactions in humans were (Morris, 2002). This approach was also used for this paper.]

Meyer-Rochow (2024)