cerebralbulimiaasylum

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Tv/Film moments that make me cry:

Aces Coming out

Men being sensual and intimate with other men

Parents positively affirming their children

Men coming out

Outcasts being accepted

epic romances unmured by sex

Sci-fi Mystical Lesbian Pregnancies where two mothers are the parents

Heroic Acts of Self-Sacrifice

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Watch ""Through Our Eyes: Living with Asperger's" (Documentary)" on YouTube

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Parent child relationships are so formative in so many people's lives. The fear of not transcending the negatives of our experience is crippling at times. Especially for those with kids of their own.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Regardless of drug or escapist coping, I still feel the intellectual level of every room I walk into. I am far too often walking into the wrong room. A room that speaks in the mundane, that does not go deeply into anything truly meaningful to me. However there is still value in relating at a gradual pace taking these tools to ease into connection so that we edge the flame rather than torch it up in overeager infernos.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

I like

Kei Cars

Celtic/Germanic/Norse Mythology

Taoism

MBTI/Socionics/Enneagram

Trees

Wooden Sailboats

Skiing/Snowboarding

Chinese/Japanese/Scandinavian/Canadian Culture

Experimental Sound Art Noise Drone Vocal

Parts Work

Surrealist Techniques

Analog A/V Technology

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Villa Meri Cana: De Bois - SoundCloud

Listen to Villa Meri Cana: De Bois by lliimns on #SoundCloud

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Dreams are weird for me. They seem realistic. They function pragmatically defragging your brain and it's concerns. But interpreting them often leads to further concern as you interpret them through an idealist lens. I'm very interested in the link between emotional salience and dream prevalence. It seems like the more emotionally present I am in my daily life, the more likely I am to have recallable dreams.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Things I like:

Vintage Electronics

Experimental Vocal Music

Psychology

Mathematics

Semiotics

Television Studies

Writing

Music

Scifi

Craft Labor

Canada

Taoism

Chinese

Buddhism

Skiing

Sailing

Yin Yoga

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

you can't love what doesn't exist.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Being myself is hard right now.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

I am my own leader. I have the capacity to hold others. But that is a choice. I have first dibs on my own love. I can love someone and also cultivate safe space between us. This does not diminish my love for them. All it does is fortify and support my capacity to continue to love myself as well as others.

My need for solitude does not negate my empathy.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Watch "Ode to the Orphan-Hearted" on YouTube

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

I'm the Q&A portion of the LGBTQIA+ Community

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

Watch "lizzojuicecover" on YouTube

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

When you run around constantly deifying everything and everyone who shows you they value you, you actually set those things and people up with unrealistic expectations they can never deliver and consequently orchestrate their fall from grace in your esteem. It's not healthy and it isolates you as they feel judged and rejected by you.

whereas if you simply worship a god whose to say they aren't giving you everything you need as proxy of yourself. you can't hurt what isn't real. you're not placing unrealistic expectations on them because your understanding of what they ought to be defines them. Fantasy provides what reality cannot.

this is gross when applied to people. this is abusive. this is wrong. this hurtful. I am struggling with this. I want to be able to just stop conceptualizing everything and everyone. especially because I'm so often wrong about them. I make assumptions. I leap to conclusions. Instead of listening and understanding. Instead of having the patience to learn from them. To cherish them for what's in front of me. To accept them and accept their acceptance in doses. To give and take the form of love that's in the momentary exchange at the present capacity of our hearts minds and souls..

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

identity check: Panalterous. Asexual. Nonbinary. Agender. INTP. 5w4.

[cerebralbulimiaasylum]

the new normal tears on the hour eggs for breakfast and a panic attack for dinner.

I call it the meltdown diet.