certainempatheticturkeymuffin
certainempatheticturkeymuffin
Welcome, fellow disasters.
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They/Them●Mostly reblogs, but I do post my own stuff occasionally!●Genshin UID (NA Server): 664777468
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Carmine and Kieran my beloveds
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Theyre the siblings ever
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Important and Often Overlooked Indigo Disk DLC Lore: Drayton as the Foil to Kieran
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⚠️ ⚠️⚠️ NOT PROPAGANDA ⚠️⚠️⚠️
🎺✨ TIRED OF ONION BREATH-FUELED MELTDOWNS? TRY DRAYTON BEING ICONIC™: NOW IN MINT CRUSH FORMULA! ✨🎺
Do you have a rival who monologues in the mirror? Broods in forests and unnecessarily kicks people out of clubs through immature rage? Smells like one-sided, melodramatic betrayal and soured produce? Say goodbye to that and hello to minty-fresh righteousness with DRAYTON BEING ICONIC™, the #1 recommended soul-cleansing toothpaste rival! While Kieran spirals into his Onion Arc™ - layers of insecurity, bitterness, and garlic-adjacent vibes - Drayton Being Iconic™ comes in cool, collected, and mint-coded, ready to rinse the angst right out of any depraved soul.
Why hang with the onionhead who got ghosted by an Ogre and the girl, when you can have...
Cool, calm, collected: nothing phases the Drayster. You could scream, cry, or confess your sins - he’d just blink slowly and adjust his collar before going "good for you, buddy."
Battle skills so clean they sparkle: probably brushes his pokemon's teeth between turns.
Wellness as a priority: regular cafeteria dates, a full night’s sleep, and impeccable oral hygiene.
Clinically smug. Spiritually flossed. The Drayster doesn’t battle - he freshens. One cleansing quip from him and the edginess melts down to the ground. Say farewell to emotional instability and hello to sparkling character arcs. Side effects include: emotional exfoliation, being humbled on sight, and immaculate League Clubroom posture (complimentary chair and chastising tsundere girl included).
🪥 DRAYTON BEING ICONIC™: Brightly Whitening the Plotline, One Onion at a Time. 🪥
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GLORIOUS REUNION
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Moon's reflection in water
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Barbatos <3
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I started this one on his birthday this week, and its just in time for me to return to Mondstadt in the game for the archon quest!
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Картинка про персонажей генша, она уже старая, со времен сумеру когда еще не вышел Байчжу, как это видно. Да, я очень люблю аранар... скучаю по лучшему региону.
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Not enough Liu Qingge tripping and falling into wife plots. Let’s melt his clothes at embarrassing times. Dunk him in truth potion lake. Give him magic hypothermia that can only be cured by sharing body heat and qi with the person you have feelings for (in the nude ofc). Make him a wet, wet cat of a man where every day is the hardest day of his life and the only thing that would make it better is being allowed to sleep on Shen Yuan’s warm, plush bosom.
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Liu Qingge is so autism and he loves Shen Yuan because he's one of the few people that Gets Him he'll randomly walk out of a meeting without a word and everyone gets mad at Liu Qingge for being rude and Shen Yuan is the one to smooth things over by saying "Liu-shidi is a fighter by nature, he can't sit in one place all day! he needs to stretch his legs out" and Liu qingge is so heart warmed he professes his love immediately (by grunting unintelligibly (unfortunately this part shen yuan misunderstands as friendship))
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Liushen week day 2: Mandarin Orange
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Shen Yuan: I still don't understand how you're still single. You're so hot!
Liu Qingge: It's because the man I'm in love with is straight
Shen Yuan: What, is he blind? Even a straight man would want to go out with you!
Liu Qingge: Really? Do you want to go out on a date with me?
Shen Yuan: You know what, yes! Let's show your crush what he's missing out on!
Liu Qingge: Holy shit, it was this easy this whole time?!
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The only explanation I would accept for Mu Qingfang avoiding SY’s wife beam is if he uses glasses to avoid direct eye contact with people like will graham and so he’s never had the full force of it fall upon him.
I do not think this spares him, it only buys him time.
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Me: “and what do we Not have to do when we’re writing fanfiction?”
Also Me, bitterly backspacing out of my parenthesis: “Add citations”
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*kicking my feet on my bed like a school girl*
What would be Mulan! Shen Yuan's reaction if one day his parents were like "you are getting a sibling" and then left without expanding on that?
Better yet, how would QiJiu react if Shen Yuan stuck his head through a doorway, yelled "you're getting a grandchild!" and immediately books it?
In this au, since Shen Yuan himself was plant child, I think he genuinely would be curious as to what method was happening this time. There’d be a brief moment of time where he panicked about all of the potential options and Why they had decided to get a child before QiJiu show back up with a NYY that they had found on the streets.
Sy: Ahhhh they meant adoption…right??? Baba where did you find the child????
Sy announcing them as grandparents would definitely make Yqy cry. You know that he would be the best pushover grandpa to exist. It would depend on how many years SJ would have to reluctantly get used to LQG regrettably being attached to SY but he’d always threaten castration despite that not being at all involved in this.
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ohhh women not being allowed in the army being a new rule... binghe... this is sxy related isnt it
:DDDDDDDD
Many people did feel it came out of seemingly no where when it was first enforced. Especially since there were already several established female warriors. Caused quite the commotion, but many theorized that it had probably something to do with how the official heir to throne had died in the war, leaving it to the regent himself.
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Chapters: 2/? Fandom: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Liu Qingge/Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu, Shen Jiu | Original Shen Qingqiu/Yue Qingyuan, Shen Jiu | Original Shen Qingqiu & Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu, Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu & Yue Qingyuan Characters: Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu, Liu Qingge, Shen Jiu | Original Shen Qingqiu, Yue Qingyuan Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Mulan (Disney Movies) Fusion, Shen Jiu | Original Shen Qingqiu and Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu are Not the Same Person, Oblivious Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu, Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu is Shen Jiu | Original Shen Qingqiu and Yue Qingyuan’s Child, Warm Red Pavilion (Scum Villain), Rating May Change, Slow Burn, Liushen Slowburn specifically, Established Shen Jiu | Original Shen Qingqiu/Yue Qingyuan, Lets get down to business (Business won’t happen for several chapters), Other Additional Tags to Be Added Summary:
Shen Yuan had been doing great so far at avoiding unnecessary plot after he was transmigrated into the worst cultivation/Imperial War novel he’d ever read. He’s got his bamboo home in the mountain, the beasts his Baba definitely shouldn’t know he’s feeding, and eventually he’ll even figure out how to make his two dad’s let him break free a little and be all that he can be!
Why should it matter to him that there’s another war going on? It’s not like he has a sword to fight with or anything. And what’s the deal with this cricket?
It’s a Mulan Au
——–
Alright everyone, come get your prologue and first chapter! Fresh off the stove.
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I rewarded myself for writing that first chapter with Mulan au Shen Yuan in matchmaker outfit as the universe intended
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If A Boy Worth Fighting For was a musical like half of its source material it’s important to imagine that after the argument with SJ, SY gets to have a very heartfelt song about all of the beasts he wants to see one day.
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