chained-by-secrets

[chained-by-secrets]

"Affirmative. Excuse me for a moment." With a small bow of his head, Parker took a couple of steps back before turning the corner - it was simultaneously farther than it should've been, yet strangely close for a house that size - a reading or drawing room, perhaps. He wasn't sure, it'd been so long since he'd actually seen the blueprints for the house. In any case, this was an opportunity for Parker to properly think about what he wanted to ask Evelyn in attempts to make small talk.

He'd already asked her if she'd been well. She probably didn't want to talk about the night they'd encountered each other, so he discarded those thoughts as well, if only temporarily as he went to a sizable cooler that rested on the ground, safely obscured from anyone who might've regarded the front or side of the mansion. Perhaps he could inquire about her art, he... thought, before immediately thinking the instance was rare; his internal monologue was so rarely his. It felt... unnatural.

A furrow set onto his features as he withdrew a large jar from the icy water in the cooler as well as a rounded glass - normally, the dirt from his hands would've muddied the water but as he realized that he hadn't actually done anything that day, his hands were clean. 'Don't fall apart, boy.' His father warned him, bringing his thoughts back to a semblance of normalcy as he made sure there was ice in the glass before shutting the cooler lid. 'Ain't no one gonna pick up those pieces but you.' A pause as he turned the corner once more, with the jar held delicately in one arm while the other held the glass in a gentle palm.

'Ask her--' "I apologize again." He dared cut off his father's voice in his head as he set the glass down before her, also setting the jar (which was sparkling, sunshine yellow and had what appeared to be entire lemon slices floating in the crystalline liquid) nearby on the table, careful not to set it too close to any flowers. The retaliation was a small, but sharp involuntary inhale through his nose but he moved past it, almost as though he wasn't aware that it happened. "I was attempting to think of appropriate questions to ask you but..." He fell silent. Then, wordlessly, he unscrewed the lid of the jar and, with a practiced hand, carefully poured the drink into the glass.

"I'm insufficient at small talk." He concluded. "Ergo, we can talk about anything you'd like."

She noted with interest that he maintained eye contact, which she didn't mind at all. Was he making any sort of mistake or breaking social norms? Evelyn didn't really pay attention to that, at least not right now. If anything, it might have been her who was being rude. Her thoughts vanished the moment he straightened himself, and curiosity surged as she realized he was indeed quite tall.

Now she could have very well been seeing things, like the corner of his mouth moving slightly. Even with his neutral expression, for a second she thought he had almost attempted to smile back. That was something, wasn't it? The conversation between them might have led to awkward glances or uneasy body language, but that didn't apply here—not in Evelyn's mind. She found this encounter refreshing. While he may not have fully revealed much about himself verbally, his body language and gestures spoke volumes. She smiled again, intrigued by the silent communication between them.

Frowning for a moment, she doubted he would go off and tell anyone about their encounter. He didn't seem the type. Still, she disliked how she had approached him that night. "I wouldn't assume you would have," she said, though if he had, she wouldn't blame him. After all, she was on property that wasn't her own. She followed his gaze as he lowered it, before the subject changed. Straightening up, she leaned back into the chair. "I'd love some, thank you." She held the flower that was on the table, unsure how long she would be staying and hoping she wasn't taking too much of his time.

[chained-by-secrets]

Start a rumor about my muse in my inbox

[chained-by-secrets]

IN CHARACTER CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT QUESTIONS .

send an emoji/series of emojis for my muse to answer any of the following questions in character! for some questions, there are fields italicized and bolded for you to fill in with the name of a person/place/event/etc in the muse's life. please remember to fill in these spaces in order for the question to make sense! each emoji is described in case you can't see them, and they are listed alphabetically. ♡

✈️ AIRPLANE — have you traveled anywhere that helped you discover something about yourself and/or about the world?

😠 ANGRY FACE — how easy or difficult is it for you to express your emotions? if you find it difficult, what do you think is holding you back?

🎨 ARTIST PALETTE — what are some hobbies that you like to partake in? do you think they're just to pass time or to distract yourself, or do you believe some of them potentially have therapeutic outcomes for you?

🎈 BALLOON — what is something you've created and/or accomplished recently that you're proud of?

🖤 BLACK HEART — what would you say is the darkest thought you've ever experienced? what do you think caused you to have that thought? have you ever planned on or fantasized about acting on it?

🏹 BOW AND ARROW — if there's something from your past that you'd give anything to go back in time and redo, what is it?

💔 BROKEN HEART — is there anyone in your life you wish you had a better relationship with? if so, how come? what makes this person important to you?

🎄 CHRISTMAS TREE — what is your favorite holiday and why?

🌙 CRESCENT MOON — what would you say is your current biggest dream and/or career aspiration and why?

❌ CROSS MARK — how would your life be different if [name of person] had never been in it? would it be better or worse?

⚔️ CROSSED SWORDS — do you have any skills that you are absolutely grateful you have and that mean a lot to you? how do you usually use these skills? would they come in handy if someone you cared about was in trouble?

🔮 CRYSTAL BALL — what is a core memory from your childhood that you think defines you today?

🗡️ DAGGER — what is something or someone you know you can't afford to lose? how far are you willing to go to make sure you don't lose it/them?

💧 DROPLET — are you grieving something or someone? do you feel like you lost something or a part of yourself with it/them?

😶‍🌫️ FACE IN CLOUDS — is there something you're hiding from the people you love? if so, how urgent is it for them to hear it? what's holding you back from sharing it?

🍂 FALLEN LEAVES — how would you metaphorically describe your life and the journey(s) you've been on?

👻 GHOST — is there someone or something that you feel is missing from your life? do you know if there's any way to find it/them?

🩶 GRAY HEART — what kind of friend do your friends consider you to be (mom friend, uncle friend, funny friend, etc) and why? what do you think this says about your personality?

🤝 HANDSHAKE — do family or platonic relationships mean more to you? or do they mean different things to you?

❤️‍🔥 HEART ON FIRE — what angers you the most? what triggers this anger, and how do you cope with it? what does this anger feel like, if you had to describe it?

💋 KISS MARK — if you had to share a romantic kiss with a loved one, where would you share that kiss and why? are you thinking about giving this romantic kiss somewhere other than the other person's lips?

✝️ LATIN CROSS — are you a religious person? did you grow up religious? does your faith mean anything to you today?

🩵 LIGHT BLUE HEART — what do you fantasize about the most often (generally/sexually/etc)? are there any people that are significant to or that you can see in this fantasy and why?

⚡️ LIGHTNING BOLT — how has [significant event in muse's life] impacted you? what has it made you realize about yourself? about others? about the world?

💄 LIPSTICK — have you had any romantic or sexual experiences that made you realize something about yourself?

🪄 MAGIC WAND — would you describe yourself as a superstitious person (someone who believes in superstitions)? do you believe in luck?

❤️‍🩹 MENDING HEART — how strongly do you experience your emotions? does it depend on who you're interacting with and/or the context of the situation?

🎶 MUSICAL NOTES — what song lyrics do you think most accurately describe you? your journey through life? who you are as a person?

🫂 PEOPLE HUGGING — generally speaking, do you feel very supported by the people in your life? how strong and cohesive is your support system, if you have one? do you often feel like you're at the front of the line or pushed to the side by the people in your life?

❤️ RED HEART — what is/are your love language(s)? how do you use it/them to communicate your feelings about others?

💞 REVOLVING HEARTS — who and/or what are you most grateful for in your life?

🎀 RIBBON BOW — how confident are you with your physical appearance? is there anything about it that you are insecure about? is there anything about it that you are happy about or gives you confidence? how do you think people perceive you based on your physical appearance?

🧪 TEST TUBE — if you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what is one thing you absolutely have to resolve and/or do before then?

🤔 THINKING FACE — what three emotions tend to dominate your mindset? do you know why they do?

💭 THOUGHT BALLOON — is there something or someone you find yourself thinking about more often than other things? if so, why do you think you do this?

💀 SKULL — how has [name of person] 's death influenced your outlook on life, if anything?

☀️ SUN — would you describe yourself as more of an introvert or extrovert, or are you somewhere in between? how come?

🪽 WING — if you could choose to have one superpower for a day, what would it be and why? what would you do with it?

✍️ WRITING HAND — what is one thing you wish you were better at? this can be a tactical skill, social skill, hobby, etc.

[chained-by-secrets]

Patrick Wilson photographed by Matt Holyoak for Alexa (NY Post)

[chained-by-secrets]

He was doing it again. Asking questions that weren't important and where the answers didn't matter. It was small talk, something that was never his strong suit, but she was enduring enough to entertain those inane questions during this decidedly unusual time of sitting on a porch with a sunning alligator hatchling.

She explained the 'stereotypes' of how people interpreted scorpions, which were perhaps a little abstract for his mind until she reached the 'positive' which was that they were... sufficient at engaging in sexual intercourse. That was strange, and yet something else he didn't entirely think he understood, nor did he think he was meant to understand it. "..." There was probably meant to be a sentence in the silence about how 'sexual stinging' tended to occur in scorpion mating rituals but he kept the comment to himself.

"A horoscope?" He asked, attempting to find an association with the word as she also mentioned the paper in the same sentence. Newspaper? Stereotypes... In any case, Parker shook his head slightly. "No, I... haven't." He said. "I'm... guessing it's not part of your stargazing hobbies, either." A pause. "Do people... take them seriously?"

kal laughs again. "you know what? i don't know. i've never thought about it before. i'm not sure it was ever meant to be plural." there are words like that, certainly. like deer—singular and plural. she wonders briefly if aquarius is similar in that respect. "i'll have to look it up the next time i'm at a computer." her phone, by contrast, is very simple—more of a glorified pager than anything else. she has a smart phone... but that contraption remains at home most of the time. "precisely, as in the scorpion. of course, most of the stereotypes are also things people associate with scorpions... cunning, callous, distant... sharp. the only difference is in the positive, i think—apparently we're good in bed. i've never known anyone to have natural talent in that respect, but you have to take what you can get. of course, i'm also used to negative stereotypes..." she shrugs a shoulder. "it's nothing serious for me. although occasionally it can be fun to read my horoscope in the paper. have you ever bothered with it?"

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Fortunately, she either didn't mind his faux-pas or, more preferably, she didn't notice it even if Parker himself did as he exchanged stares with her. He remembered her staring at him the first time they met, too; strange, considering that most people seemed rather intimidated by locking eyes for extended durations.

Perhaps she was attempting to establish dominance. Maybe he shouldn't have been staring back at her.

'You already screwed up with the damn present. boy. What's a little staring.'

He subconsciously straightened his spine, making himself appear even taller compared to the woman who sat comfortably at the table.

So she smiled, and considered today to be one of the good days - at least... he thought she said that. It was soft, almost too soft for his hearing to pick up. And he stared back at her with his mild expression, neutral but not disinterested. Indeed, when she said that, the corner of his mouth moved, as though it was trying to emulate her smile and replicate one for himself. It never got there, however, and maybe for the best since she was now expressing lamentation for how she... behaved that night?

"I understand." Did he, though? Parker never really bothered hiding any facets of himself from anyone; he didn't think he had any to hide. "If it matters, I... haven't told anyone about that night." Another pause; usual for him, more usual than how he lowered his gaze contemplatively. He then cleared his throat, blinking and glancing off to look at nothing in particular. "Apologies, I should offer you a... beverage. I have lemonade; would you care for some?"

Seeing him speak and then pause, she wondered if she had rendered him speechless. She hadn't thought she could do that, yet here he was, processing her words and trying to form a reply. It was truly a sight to see, something she noted as different. While he hadn't quite said anything yet, she observed the way he held the gift in his hand. "I'm glad you appreciate the gift," she said. While most people might not see his actions as deserving of such gratitude, she did. "It's a reward because you showed me basic decency. I am going to remember that."

Nodding her head, she gave a small smile. "More good days than bad, including this one," she said softly. "This is a good one." She maintained eye contact, her gaze unwavering as she spoke, making sure her words reached him clearly. There was a sense of wonder in her expression as if she was experiencing something special. It left her pondering if he had ever been thanked with a gift before, the thought filling her with a mix of curiosity and admiration. "Not a side of myself I wanted to show to anyone."

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Patrick Wilson in The Conjuring 2 (2016)

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He frowned at her explanation, not because he didn't like it but because despite it, he still didn't understand. "I..." Yet, Parker faltered instead of offering a sufficient reply. He didn't receive gifts often, and part of him wondered if it was because he never quite knew how to react to them. They were acknowledged with uncertain gestures and awkward thanks that was honest, but delivered in such ways that made his words seem inauthentic.

So he held the gift aloft, lightly as though it was a child he was worried about dropping. "I... appreciate it." He said. "But..." Again, he faltered, his robotic expression shifting ever-so-slightly from one thing to another before settling back into neutral acceptance. "I don't understand being rewarded for doing what... is basic decency."

Another pause and he shook his head. "Apologies. I shouldn't protest. It's a gift, and... I appreciate it." He said as though finalizing his opinion on the matter. "But you've been... better since that night?" He asked, drawing her back into his focus of attention. "More... good days than bad?"

She appreciated the area that had some shade. The small table created a picturesque scene. She imagined how delightful it would be to have breakfast outside or even to paint the scenery just as it was. She could definitely create a beautiful portrait. As she lost herself in thoughts of creativity and ideas, she noticed him raise an eyebrow slightly. Tilting her head, she wondered if she had said something wrong.

Taking a seat, she listened to his response. Touché. He was sharp to notice that she wasn't exactly elaborating on how she was doing. She didn't want to lie but also didn't want to open Pandora's box—her past was meant to stay in the past.

"I've been healthy, and most days are good. Some are bad, like the night I ran into you," she said softly. He spoke again, and she wondered what had him confused. A light laugh escaped her lips, perhaps due to the subtlety of his reaction.

"What do you mean? You helped me find my way and escorted me safely home. I think that's a good enough reason to thank someone. My gratitude is in the form of this gift."

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He assumed that the one that she gave him was for Nicolas, and when they had gotten close, but not too close, to the estate, he instead lead her to the side that cascaded the green grass in shade. There was a neat little wooden table there, with three chairs, one of which having seen more use than the others. Parker set the one that she'd given him on the table and as she offered the other one to him, he couldn't help but raise a brow slightly.

"Just as you haven't forgotten that I asked about if you've been well." He replied, his head tilting slightly on the side of his useless ear. "Though..." A pause. "I don't understand." It was an honest statement, even as he took the 'gift'. "I haven't done anything to earn a gift." He looked at her as the confusion evident, even if subtly, on his face.

She guessed it was a good thing she hadn't arrived at a bad time during work. Showing up unannounced might have changed the course of his planned day. She wouldn't be surprised if he had to navigate this situation differently. She was amazed she even found him out here; otherwise, she might have been stuck waiting.

Following his lead, she gently placed one of the flowers in his hands and walked a few steps behind him as he guided her down the gravel path to the porch. The estate's beauty instantly captivated her. "Ah, so nothing negative, I see. Healthy, alive, and breathing," she remarked if she were to explain the events that haunted her, would he see her in a different light?. Each day was a blessing, though she couldn't shake the feeling she didn't deserve it. Holding onto his half of the gift, she held it up. "Let's not forget your gift, hmm?"

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"...Is the plural of Aquarius 'Aquariuses'?" He found himself asking, though he subtly lightened up when she mentioned 'scorpio'. It may not have been a hobby by his own admission but he was just foolish enough to interpret the word separated from its supposed origin as a... constellation. He thought. Again, he wasn't sure what that even meant aside from having to do with water.

"Scorpio as in... a scorpion?" He asked, almost with an uncertainty to his voice - he was testing his question to see if he was correct in the path of logic he'd chosen. He wouldn't say unless she asked, of course, but Parker was very fond of scorpions. He didn't know what the stereotypes of being a 'Scorpio' were but he wondered if there was any correlation between the constellation, the stereotypes and the actual behavior of scorpions. How was one related to a scorpion? Did Kal exhibit any of those traits? "What are... the stereotypes?" A follow-up question before a Parker-standard pause.

"...You don't have to answer." He added. "You can tell me about... other stargazing knowledge if you'd prefer."

kal watches with mild interest as he gently strokes the gator's cheek, wondering if every animal—when tamed, of course—is as eager for affection. she would never assume as much, but what she knows of nature is not a universal experience. wildlife has only ever been callous to her existence, and understandably so... it's only in their own societies than humankind is at the top of the food chain. this gator, when full grown, would just as soon as choose her for a meal as it would a deer or antelope. "i've found it's a common pastime around here. it must be because we have less light pollution." certainly not none, not by a long shot, but portland is much brighter than antioch, to say nothing of the larger cities the state—country, world, etc—holds. "but i'll be honest, i don't know very much about aquariuses." in high school, it was much more of a thing for her. funny how one little accident could change so much. "i'm a scorpio, though. those stereotypes i do know."

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Processing what Evelyn had said, one point at a time, Parker opted to respond by giving a small shake of his head. "Not a bad time." He replied first, not dishonestly; it was a fine day, despite his own melancholy, and he wasn't engaged in anything strenuous. Perhaps he should've been; he was always taught that manual labor and, to a slightly alternative extent, did well to distract one from their thoughts.

Now he had Evelyn, however, however temporarily. He gestured for her to follow to him as he led the way down the gravel path to the porch of the estate, holding his hands out in a silent offer to take the... deliveries from her. "...Well, this context, would qualify as "healthy, happy, personally successful or otherwise not negative"," he defined the word at her instruction, part of him understanding that by that answer, she had not, in fact, been doing well. "...Would you like to discuss it?" He asked, not forgetting that she said that one of the arrangements was for him, but deciding that asking her was more important.

The estate looked different in the daytime. She couldn't tell if it was a good or bad idea. Stepping out today had felt necessary, and Evelyn hoped her gesture would be appreciated. Usually, customers came to the flower shop to pick up their orders, but she had decided to make this delivery herself.

Though she rarely got nervous, she could feel the hairs on the back of her neck standing up. Would he recognize her, or would she just be another face passing by? Evelyn. Ah, so he remembered, not that she doubted it, it was just easy to look her over. "I actually have two deliveries. The first order is for Mr. Vegara. The second is well... for you."

"I hope I didn't come at a bad time." the second flowers were a thank you from the previous night when she had wandered onto the estate. He had helped her find her way back home. "Oh, it is no problem I don't mind making the trip." she said with a nod. Had she been well? that was a loaded question. If she included the past few weeks, she'd say no. "Define well." she teased, knowing he probably would give the definition. However, she wanted to hear it anyway.

[chained-by-secrets]

If there was a standoff or a test of wills between them, it was unintentional on Parker's part. That didn't mean that he didn't feel himself relaxing his shoulders slightly when John conceded, at least in a manner of speaking, and got the dirt out of his face. The taller man shifted to indicate that since John had relinquished the grip he had attempted to hold on the direction the conversation was going, Parker wasn't about to take advantage of the latter's compromised thought process.

But his brow, already furrowed from their previous exchange, twinged faintly once more at John's comment, his eyes following the dirt as it was discarded and subsequently toed back into its place. He wondered how much of the older man's words held any truth. Assuming anything he said was true; the man heard... things... in the earth. What if that was true and Parker just couldn't hear it because of his deficiency? 'This place is fucked up,' his father had said more than once, late at night. A bottle glimmered in the dull lamplight as Parker peeked in on a conversation he wasn't supposed to be privy to.

'It changes you. Pulls you in, chews you up. Spits you out.' He took a drink from the bottle. 'But we don't leave. No one leaves. No one that stays gone, anyway.'

Parker still didn't know who he was talking to those nights. His gaze flickered up and to the right momentarily before finding John once more and he blinked, shaking his head and removing the trowel from his utility belt. "I don't believe I'm above anything." He replied as he dropped to one knee gently and started tending to the earth, carefully, a gentleness to his large hands. A pause. "You don't have to assist me." He added, glancing up intently at John as he spoke. "You can... keep searching for your meaning."

And...failure. A long moment of silence followed Parker's rejection and John was left standing there throughout it, faintly trembling with adrenaline and conviction and finally realizing it was all a waste of time. He knew better than to try and explain himself to Parker, but when he sensed that brief falter in the groundskeeper's façade, John couldn't help but to dig in a hook and prepare for the fight. Now he was sent stumbling back to square one, a demented old man clutching dirt in a white-knuckled fist.

There was a reason he tended to avoid that method of evangelism: it was too abrupt, too divisive. The hissing, infernal truth was too strong...it had to be watered down and fed slowly.

John exhaled slow, watched as he tilted his hand to the side and allowed the damp earth to fall back down to the lawn. "We're all ill to live here, son," John grunted after he'd regained his composure, using the toe of his boot to shove the displaced dirt back into the gash. "Not sure which one comes first, but if you think you're above it, you should take another look." He stepped back across the invisible line, searching for a moment before beginning to shovel loose a section of healthy sod for Parker to patch with.

[chained-by-secrets]

4, 14, 27

Specific Questions Meme!

4. What's a hobby they used to have that they miss?

His mother used to take him to see stage plays and musicals often and he enjoyed these outings in that Parker way but ever since his father died, she stopped offering to take him. He wonders why, but lacks the emotional intelligence to offer for her.

14. How do they put out a candle?

Strangely, he licks his thumb and puts it out with his fingers. He's always hated blowing on things though so this spreads fewer particles, he thinks.

27. What's the worst gif they ever received? How did they respond?

It's a little abstract but he really doesn't like when people at social gatherings proclaim that their presence (hah) is the gift. Especially if they're obnoxious. In a more literal sense, though, alcohol is always wasted on him and he feels some semblance of guilt when he received pricey alcohol. Of course, he keeps the comments to himself, asks if they'd like some and he keeps it just in case someone drops by who wants it. Sometimes he gifts it to other people.

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❌ do u smoke weed everyday

"...Yes. How could you guess."

[He wants to add 'this is sarcasm' but refrains. I'm proud of him.]

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assumption: parker would end up trimming the dickshrubs into rectangles if he was made to tend to them

Without a doubt. Not spheres, not aesthetically-pleasing, abstract rhombuses. Those suckers are being cut into rectangles and treated as rectangles from then on out. And if it's a fancy shape like a centaur or something else with a notable dingdong, it's being cut off. Sorry he can't appreciate phallic topiaries, guys :/

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I assume Parker gets hit on a lot but he doesn't realize it's happening

I THINK that's true. I can't say for certain how often he gets hit on, but 95% of the time he doesn't realize that that's what they're doing. The other 5%, through some miracle, he *does* realize that he's being hit on but he earnestly believes that there's been a mistake

[chained-by-secrets]

what do they commonly misinterpret because of their own upbringing/environment/biases? how do they respond when realizing the misunderstanding ?

Specific Questions Meme!

43. "Humor" is probably the most obvious and easiest to answer given his own shortcomings, history, upbringing and experiences. He takes everything and says everything so seriously, to the point where if he does understand a joke or if someone has to tell him that it was a joke, he'll often apologize. Otherwise, he'll state that he acknowledges that he (or someone else) either made a joke or was being sarcastic. Whether he's right or not is a follow-up exchange, but he tries. He also doesn't want people to think that he's joyless, he's just very serious lol