chalktalksandeverythinginbetween

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Jireh, You are enough.

When I recall October, I can only remember how God has been good to me. He is, indeed, enough--more than enough. I have no expectations for this month except that I know it will be different now compared to years ago. It is by God’s grace on how that month has turned out. It was beyond my expectations. I was surprised.

I haven’t been feeling like myself since last year. I felt like I have lost myself juggling over work, acads, and survival. I can’t even process things like how I used to and it felt very unusual for me. 

October seemed to be a breather to me. For once, I was allowed to just be me--to experience life and catch up with things that I missed. I felt grounded on myself again. I have explored a part of me that I just discovered. I loved how free I am to feel, to express, and to live.

A day after my birthday, I received the news that I was accepted for a job that I applied to. Things went by fast. Days after, I have signed the contract, met with them once again to discuss compensation and all, and met with the visa sponsor. 

I’ve never felt more loved than I am right now. I’ve never felt God is closer than He is right now.

All I can say is that it is only God’s grace and Jesus’ abounding mercy that I am able to share how good He is in my life. I will always look back on October 2021 and will feel the same gratitude, contentment, and joy in my heart.

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Notes on Classroom Behavior Management

Have recently come across with Classroom Behavior Management: A Dozen Common Mistakes and What To Do Instead article by authors Barbetta, P., Norona, K., and Bicard D. Sharing with you some of my notes.

Mistake 1: Defining misbehavior by how it looks Defining a misbehavior how it looks tells us nothing about why it occurred and often doesn’t help in our behavior-change efforts. Instead: Define misbehavior by its function Ask yourself: “What did the student gain from the misbehavior?”

Mistake 2: Asking, “Why did you do that?” Two reasons: Many times, our students will not know the reasons why they misbehaved and we often will not like their answers. Instead: Assess the behavior directly to determine its function Do Antecedent-Behavior-Consequence (ABC) information gathering procedure. When the misbehavior occurs, it is written down in the Behavior column. The event that happened immediately before the misbehavior is recorded under Antecedent column. The things that happened after the misbehavior is written under Consequence behavior. Once we determine the function of the misbehavior, we need to teach and reinforce an appropriate replacement behavior. Example, when a student teases her friends at recess because that’s the only time she gets their attention, we can teach her ways to get peer attention such as sharing food or asking to be invited in a game.

Mistake 3: When an approach is not working, try harder The problem is that we often most try negatively. Instead: Try another way These strategies may include verbal redirecting, proximity control, reinforcing incompatible behaviors, changing the academic tasks, and providing additional cues or prompts. Increase the frequency of contingent praise for appropriate student behavior. When using praise, it should be provided immediately, specifically, and frequently. Make “start” than “stop” requests. 

Mistake 4: Violating the principles of good classroom rules Rules alone exert a little influence over student behavior. Instead: Follow the guidelines for the classroom rules Four to six rules that are stated positively, observable, and measurable. We need to consistently carry out the consequences and noncompliance of our classroom rules or they will mean very little.

Mistake 5: Treating all misbehaviors as “Won’t Dos” When students misbehave, it often seems as though it is exclusively a motivational issue. Instead: Treat some misbehaviors as “Can’t Dos” Seven Precorrection Steps 1.Identify where and when the misbehavior occurs. 2. Specify what we want instead. 3. Systematically modify the context such as change the instruction, tasks, schedules, and seating arrangements. 4. Have students practice the appropriate behavior. 5. Provide strong reinforcement such as frequent and immediate teacher praise. 6. Prompt expected behavior; and 7. Collect data on student performance.

Mistake 6: Lack of planning on transition time A significant amount of class time is spent on transitioning from one subject to another. Instead: Appropriately plan for transition time Follow few practical procedures. 

Mistake 7: Ignoring all or nothing at all Neither approach is effective. Instead: Ignore wisely When behaviors are attention seeking, we need to ignore continuously. Ignoring misbehavior should be a classroom rule that receives powerful reinforcement.

Mistake 8: Overuse and misuse of timeout Timeout occurs when a teacher removes a student from the class.  Instead: Follow the principles of effective timeout Administer timeout with a calm, neutral tone of voice. 

Mistake 9: Inconsistent expectations and consequences These cause confusion and frustration. Instead: Have clear expectations that are enforced and reinforced consistently Ask our students to read the expectations prior to each activity.

Mistake 10: Viewing ourselves as only the classroom manager Burnout Instead: Include students, parents, and others in management efforts  Teach student self-monitoring.

Mistake 11: Missing the link between instruction and behavior It can be that the lesson is too easy or difficult, ineffective, or non-stimulating which can lead to student misbehavior. Instead: Use academic instruction as a behavior management tool Demystify learning through: students establishing his/her own learning goals, students monitoring his/her own learning, involving students in developing classroom rules and procedures, and relating lessons to students’ own lives and interests.

Mistake 12: Taking student behavior too personally When we take our students’ misbehavior personally, we tend to lose our objectivity, look for quick management fixes that rarely work, and get emotionally upset, which takes away our time and energy from teaching. Instead: Take student misbehavior profesionally, not personally We view behavior management as our responsibility. The time and energy wasted being upset at our students’ misbehavior is better spent celebrating our students’ success. 

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How long is God making you wait?

In Genesis 12, God made it clear on the first four verses that He has blessed Abraham (who was then Abram) about a homeland for his offspring.  Even though the gift of a son is not directly mentioned in this first communication, God hinted at His plan for Abram. Abraham was 75 years old when he first received the promise, and Genesis 21:5 tells us he was 100 years old when Isaac was born. Sarah was 90. 

So Abraham and Sarah waited 25 years for the fulfillment of God’s promise.

How long is God making you wait? Months? A year or two? In this fast-paced world, I can’t imagine waiting for 25 long years. In those 25 years, Abraham and Sarah thought of things that might facilitate or help God in fulfilling His promise which God despised. Isn’t it that sometimes we do things on our way thinking God needs our help because He takes so long in fulfilling His promise? Yet God continuously reminds us that He who promised is faithful (Hebrews 10:23). 

His purposes cannot be stopped. He does whatever He pleases. His power is superior to all powers.

In my waiting season, I ask God to supply me with the faithfulness that I need just as He provided for Abraham--that I may not slip away in His plans. May God cultivate an virtue of patience and diligence in me that while I am waiting, I will do things that brings Him honor and glory. Continuously persevering into His purposes for Him. 

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Think of the hardest challenge you've been in the past three years. See all the good that has come from it. See that in a way, the universe is throwing a challenge at you so that you could become stronger, you could learn a lesson, you could grow from it, you could impact other people's lives from it, you could help other people once they go through that same exact situation.

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Nine Natural Ways to Have More Energy

1. Get some sleep.

2. Drink caffeine an hour after you wake up.

3. Take B-12 supplements.

4. Stop drinking alcohol.

5. Put music that you like wherever you go.

6. Try breath work.

Breathe of Fire - as fast as you can, as long as you can

Whimhoff - 30 deep breaths in, on the 30th, breathe in as much as you can and do push-ups

Skiis - breathe in using your nose, breathe out with your mouth, put your hand on top/below of your head.

7. Get outside the sun.

8. Exercise in the morning.

9. Drink more water.

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Seven Tips to be More Disciplined

Disciplined defined: being able to take actions regardless of how you feel.

1. Focus on opportunity instead of obligation.

2. Start mastering the small things.

3. Design your environment.

4. Make your body move.

5. Count down and go.

6. Ask, “How can I make this easier for myself?”

7. Get an accountability partner.

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She did what she could.

Mark 14:8

This is one of the few verses in the Bible that changed my life. Mary of Bethany poured the most lavished expensive perfume that she has, to anoint Jesus on the verge of His death and burial. She washed Jesus’ feet with her perfume using her long hair. She was ridiculed by the disciples for doing so thinking that the perfume is expensive and it will be a waste to pour it on Jesus’ feet.

I was astounded by how Jesus rebuked the disciples saying that it was not about the perfume but rather it was the investment of her love put through action. 

Jesus did not say, “She did all she could.” Jesus say, “She did what she could.”

Foolish of me to think that my efforts do not count on Jesus. I always thought that I need to do everything the grandest way possible--like really everything, all for Jesus to be glorified. Focusing the glory on what I have done rather than who Jesus is.

This verse is my reminder that Jesus honors my waiting. Jesus honors my sacrifices. Jesus honors my tithes. Jesus honors my struggles. Jesus honors my perfume--my treasures that I chose to use for Him to be glorified. 

I will stop exhausting myself doing all that I could and focus my attention to doing what I could.

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I want to acknowledge that while people are in a constant state of growth and change, please know that it is okay to simply rest. Keep an open mind if an opportunity to better yourself comes up, but you don’t have to constantly be looking for ways to improve yourself. It’s okay to grow and rest, grow and rest, and grow and rest. If you’re always looking for new ways to be better, if you’re always putting that pressure on yourself, it might make it harder for good, older habits to take hold. You’ve already made so many steps in the right direction. Take a moment to celebrate that! 

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Hot take but praise is a good tool for encouraging healthy behavior on students. Positive reinforcement is good. Relying exclusively on punishment to change student's behavior is both cruel and ineffective. If someone does better than they did yesterday, let them know you appreciate it, let them know that they're improving!

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People who wait for you to tie your shoe. People who shift closer to you when you’re subconsciously moving away while you’re walking next to them. People who smile at you as soon as you make eye contact. People who seek you out to tell you some good news. People who listen to you and hear you and understand you. Do not make the mistake of ever convincing yourself that everyone is a bad person when you yourself have done this and not even thought twice about it. 

[chalktalksandeverythinginbetween]

How do you feel knowing how much God loves you?

It simultaneously terrifies me and makes me grateful. Where would I be without Your grace, Lord?

What reminds you of His love for you?

I am reminded of God's love in the way Tatay's face light up when we spend time talking to each other telling random stories of both the past and present; Nanay's morning greetings and little updates of how did it go in the market and what breakfast she prepared and what we will be eating in the lunchtime; JM's random sending of BTS' videos that I never got to watch; Gelli's jokes at the most unexpected hour of the day; Mars' little kumustas in the wee hours considering the time difference; Ate Lanie's sudden splurge of annoying things that she saw online; Fher's relatable memes; online friend's quick hellos; and stranger's smiles on their faces. I found God's love in all these small things.

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It has been a year ago since I first heard this worship song. Today, I intently looked for it and listened to it. And the lyrics still have the same rhema to me.

When You don't move the mountains I'm needing You to move When You don't part the waters I wish I could walk through

I observed that when I am praying, I am asking God to move the mountains for me, or to part the waters, to make His plans come through. Little did I know that God will not always do it. Yes, He truly makes way to deliver His plans yet it isn’t limited to moving mountains and parting the waters for my convenience. God allows these mountains and waters to neither be moved nor parted but to be climbed and walked through. In times like this, it is my prayer that even though God will not move the mountains, He will move. He will allow me to experience His grace and be by my side as I traverse the mountains. It is my prayer that even though God will not part the waters, He will give me confidence to walk through it. He will sustain me with His strength and supply me with confidence through faith that I will walk above the waters--above the situation I have today.

Your ways are always higher Your plans are always good

Isaiah 55:8,  “’For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord.” reminds me that a lot of things that is happening right now will not make sense to me simply because God’s ways are unfathomable. God has the ability to put together the smallest and most negligible details that happen in my life and turn them into something grand--one that will make sense to me. It is my prayer to look beyond my situation and to fully entrust that God’s ways and thoughts and plans for me are better than what I think of and will exceed anything I could imagine.

There's not a place where I'll go You've not already stood

This confidence I have in God is built upon the trust I have in Him that He is an omniscient God. The Alpha and Omega--beginning and end. My struggles are known to Him. My future is known to Him. I may not be where I want to be right now, but I trust God that I am exactly where I needed to be. In confusion and disappointment, He validates me; for Jesus have felt these human emotions as well. One thing is for sure, I will not step my feet on the ground the Lord hasn’t blessed for me yet. 

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In this Word, King Jehoshaphat knew that a huge army was coming for him. He called God’s people in the kingdom to pray and fast. He reminded them how God had saved them in the past. Whatever may come, “whether the sword of judgment, or plague, or famine,” they would cry out to God knowing that He would hear and save them. (2 Chronicles 20:9)

Isn’t it that we were also put into situations as if the world is coming for us? Circumstances are downright awful and nothing seems to be doing good. Our plans are turned into a blueprint of mistakes and discouragements. These are the times that we do not know what to do.

To think that God will not give us something (whether it’s a difficult situation or problems) more than we can handle is a lie, and is not found in the Bible. The truth is: God puts us in situations that we cannot handle, so we can learn a complete dependence on Him. It will remind us that we cannot control everything that has been happening and the only way to surpass it is to learn to pray about it and lay it all down to His feet.

We fix our eyes on God because He is constant. While we may be overwhelmed on how our situation changes--worse or better, God does not change. His permanence gives us a peaceful assurance that if He promised to protect us, He will. If He promised to prosper our plans, He will. If He promised to bring us out of our situation, He will part the sea to make a way.

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If there is one thing I am always in awe of the Lord us His grace that is abundant in love and faithfulness. Oftentimes, I am left wondering, “Where would I be without Your grace, Lord?”

As I get to have a deeper relationship with Him everyday, I have learned to embrace the very situation that I am in--either good or bad, sunny or rainy, twisted or turned around. Because I have learned that where I am right now is where the protection of the Lord is. 

At this moment, I just want to glorify the Lord for who He is. I am always thankful that I am given a chance to live each day according to His will. Nothing seems to be greater than that. It is not because of what I have done. Because for sure, I am lacking in so many ways. But it is who the Lord is--sufficient. The One who fills in the gaps and lapses that I have. 

It is my prayer to continuously bring greater glory to His Name. To make His Name known. To glorify Him all the days of my life.

Apart from you, Lord. I am nothing. 

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10 things I learned from How to Make Friends and Influence People, a book by Dale Carnegie Part 2

6. Be Sympathetic with the Other Person’s Ideas and Desires

I have learned how to be open and sympathetic. In order to win people into your way of thinking, you should try to walk on their shoes. People act and think the way they do because of circumstances surrounding them. Keep in mind that before you judge, condemn, and lash out harsh words to the other person, consider that if you were in the same situation, having what they have, and where they are, you will do the same exact thing. 

Understand people beyond your perception. Always give the benefit of the doubt. The magic phrase that would stop arguments, eliminate ill-feeling, create good will is: ”I don’t blame you one iota for what you are feeling. If I were you, I would undoubtedly feel as you do.”

Feel sorry for people who come to you irritated, bigoted, and unreasoning. Most people that we meet are thirsty of sympathy. Give it to them. 

7. Begin with Praise and Honest Appreciation

I have learned that if you want to be a leader, and to change people without resentment, you should learn how to genuinely appreciate them first. Criticism is a hard pill to swallow. When you criticize a person and just bluntly tell him/her that s/he is wrong, chances are you will never get him/her into your way of thinking. You will just arouse resentment. Thus, you need to make that person feel good about him/herself first. Appreciate what s/he has been doing. Praise all his/her efforts s/he puts in everyday to strive. Then, you can point out what needs to be improved. 

8. Talk About your Mistakes Before Criticizing a Person

I have learned to not call out other people in a way as if you will not make that same mistake. No one is perfect. We all are a work in progress. To claim that we are near perfect with our established value systems and habits are both unproductive and dangerous. Hence, to avoid getting people hate you, it is best to examine yourself first.

One thing to really consider is when you are trying to correct a person who’s way younger than you. Think of the exact time you are the same as this person’s age. For sure, you will be humbled when you know that this person still performs better than you.

When you expose that you are vulnerable and far from impeccable, people will easily see how genuine you are. 

9. Give the Other Person a Fine Reputation to Live Up To

I have learned that you should call people good names-- stop calling them names with bad impressions specially on the way they behave or how they physically appear. If you want to transform a person rooted on respect, assume that the virtue that you want to see on him/her is already there. Say it to them openly so that the person can develop that certain virtue you want to see on him/her. Give them a fine reputation to live up to because it boosts their morale.

10. Use Encouragement; Make the Fault Easy to Correct

I have learned to encourage people who seem to not be good in what they are doing. We all are a work in progress and most of the time, people are dealing with so much cruelty. It will pay off to be a good and encouraging person. Translate confidence to people you encounter. Believe in whatever they can do, encourage them to explore their potentials, give them the courage to excel on their craft. 

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10 things I learned from How to Make Friends and Influence People, a book by Dale Carnegie Part 1

1. Don’t Criticize, Complain or Condemn

I recognized that human more than logical beings, are emotional beings. This means that they have feelings which can be hurt. The last things people want from me is to criticize their lifestyle, complain about their habits and condemn their decisions. I am guilty of this because I have felt that I am so self-righteous and rebukes everyone as if I’m perfect and matured.

2. Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation

This gave me an insight on how people crave to be seen as someone important. There is a desire within us that someone will value us as much as we value ourselves. The best way to deal with people is to appreciate them. Celebrate even the smallest and slightest improvement that you have seen in them. Cultivating a culture of appreciation is so underrated specially in offices where the slightest inconvenience you have made for the team will be reprimanded, but no one bothered to appreciate you in all the good things you have done to make life convenient for them. 3. Arouse in Other Person an Eager Want

I am reminded that if we want to influence people, we should take into great consideration their wants and needs. No one is interested in what we want in as much as we do. If we want to make a person do something we want, we must consider what the person wants. Mastering this craft has a lot of advantages. First, we will not arouse tension and screaming. Seond, we can give the other person options. Lastly, we will let the person realize why s/he needs to make that choice. 

Reflecting on my ways, I do think that I am unselfish and willingly serves other people. As my friends would say, when they need help, I sure am offer something overboard. In a world full of selfishly-ill people nowadays considering what is it that they want, be the unselfish one serving people what they need.

4. The Only Way to Get the Best of an Argument is to Avoid It.

I learned that winning in an argument is an empty victory because it will leave the other person embarrassed and, you didn’t win him into liking you. If you haven’t changed the mind of your opponent in your arguments, you will be as futile as wrong. During an argument, a person portrays his/her importance by asserting authority, sometimes accompanied by loud voices, and body languages that aren’t necessary. Once you recognize that the person is asserting his/her importance, you must do something about it and use it in your leverage.

In a hateful argument, it will not end by hateful or derogatory remarks as well. The only way to end an argument is through democratic communication--exposing each other’s thoughts and genuinely considering the other person’s point of view.

In keeping the disagreement away from being an argument, the three most important things that I can consider right away is to welcome it, keep calm, and try not to resist or defend while the person is talking.

5. If You’re Wrong, Admit it Quickly and Empathically

I have learned that you must open yourself to rebuke. If you’re trying yo win poeple at your side, you must do it subtly yet tactfully. When it comes to correcting yourself, do it bluntly in front of the other person you have wronged.

In fact, I have been practicing this for a while since I started to be more focused on my self-development process. If I know that I am wrong, I will call out myself. I wanted to be the witness of my decisions, actions, and emotions. If we are going to be rebuked for what we have done, it will be a way better to beat the other person into it. I should say all the derogatory things the other person intends to say and say it upfront to him/her. Chances are I will be forgiven more easily and the risk of arguments will be lessened.

Accepting your mistakes requires courage and nobility. Most fools always come up with excuses, but there is a certain degree of satisfaction that comes when you admit that you are wrong.