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chelseaonjta-blog · 6 years ago

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last days of jta

wow so i just want to acknowledge that i really do suck at keeping journals. my intervals go from daily to once every three months to reasonable day intervals. i’m sorry, future self. i wish i could say i tried my hardest but to be honest, i didn’t very much. mental note: use the journal i bought from flying tiger from now on! it’s in the balixbayan box now, but once i get my hands on it, i should start writing in it! for some reason, writing instead of typing has become more appealing to me now.

i will also get back to writing about madrid once i’m less...focused (?) on leaving

so. i’m down to my last 3-4 days of JTA. 3-4 depending on when I consider the “last” day to be - whether it’s the day i board the plane or the last full day i have before that. my practical self says it ends on the 30th, but my sentimental self wants to hold on for as long as i can and say that my last is july 1. so fine, let’s let sentimental self have its win. 4 days it is.

wooooow. i don’t even know what to feel anymore. i think i’ve wanted to go home for so long that at this point its just become numbing, as if i never actually expected to get here anymore. and now that i am here...i don’t want to leave. my JTA wasn’t bad, and i don’t regret going. i’m a little concerned for all the times my parents had to spend for me though (i tried to be cheap, but even basic necessities are expensive!), but aside from that it’s been a good six months. i look back and i can say for sure that i’m not the same person i was coming in. I’ve grown. i don’t know how exactly...ok maybe i do. let me try to put it into words, but honestly every time i think about my past six months i get this uncomfortable feeling in my stomach and my heart drops a little bit. i guess i can’t really imagine leaving just yet, no matter how much i wanted to before.

I guess throughout the six months I’ve learned who I am. awow. but really! i’m proud i didn’t do anything out of character these last six months. if anything, i think i was able to solidify who i am and what i stand for. I’ve become comfortable with the truth that I am Catholic. being in secular Europe has not changed that about me, and it’s even made my faith stronger and made me want to seek Jesus out even more. I am stronger in faith.

I also know now what kind of person I am. I’m anxious over little things, meticulous, a worrier. especially on travel. hahaha. but I’m also sociable, I sacrifice my own time and energy for my friends (even though it’s unarguably a hassle for me), and I look out for other people. I think about others’ needs. and I expect that kind of respect and concern back. and sometimes I don’t get it, and it disappoints me. but hey, we can’t get everything right? even if I do get sad that I sometimes don’t feel as looked out for as I look out for certain people, I don’t really see myself changing how I act towards others. I’m less petty now. I let things go. I focus on the bigger picture. I try to let go and let God more often, because I’ve realized that 1) I don’t know what I’m doing 99% of the time and even if I do know, I don’t do it so well and 2) God knows better than me. I feel a little like Moana - I know who I am. and I’m weird, a little extra, a little too much sometimes, but I know I also have a heart that reaches out for others. JTA has made me accept myself, and all of myself - the good side and the bad. looking back, i don’t know which side was harder to accept. either way, I’m happy I accepted it. now, I am stronger in my identity.

I can stand on my own now. of course I’m still a little hesitant to do it when the time comes, but I go for it anyway. I can make it out alive. I’m more willing to put myself out there too. I think JTA is an exercise on fear. Not on how to lose it, but on how to handle it. And not just fear, actually...JTA has let me handle all my emotions. I’ve learned throughout JTA that no matter how perfect the situations are, you’re still going to feel every single emotion. all the negative ones and positive ones. and I can’t really control what comes first and when one emotion should even be there at all. but they are there. I have realized that it does me no good to deny myself my emotions. they are there, they are real, and they tell of something that matters so much to me that I feel for it. and I need to listen. my emotions are important. but JTA has also taught me that they are not everything. again, JTA is an exercise on emotion. when we missed our bus to barcelona (yes... I do need to get back to that soon), I was feeling all kinds of tired and disappointed and frustrated. and it was so easy to lash out at each other, but we didn’t. it was a tense moment for everyone, but we pulled through gracefully. and that’s what Madrid taught me. emotions are real. they exist and they should be acknowledged. but what matters most is how I handle them. when we’re in shit, we’re in shit, and we can’t change that. but we have to pull through. I control my emotions, not the other way around. it was in that moment that my patience was really being tested, and it’s like I saw it in front of me: what do I value more? letting out my temporary emotions or helping my friends by not adding to the tension? the answer was easy. I’m not at 100% perfect balance of emotions yet, but I’m getting there. that moment in Madrid was a perfect case study. because of that, I am stronger emotionally.

But back to the fear, because there’s another aspect of it that I want to talk about. I said “I’m more willing to put myself out there too”. and that’s true - I’m less afraid of being labeled “weird” or extra or whatever. life is about living, about going out there and seeing what it’s all about. throughout my JTA, I have decided that I do not want to be the bystander. I want to experience, to be in on the joke. there’s more to life then doubts and hesitations and sticking to what we know. I think this was encouraged by the thinking of “oh what the hell, I’m on JTA anyway!”. that thinking helped me step out of my comfort zone a lot. I don’t have extreme memories like skydiving or something, but I do mean that I got to interact with more people and even travel with some of them (none of whom were Filipino!). better yet, I got to experience a different kind of “going out” that I wouldn’t have chosen for myself. I got to go clubbing, to dance to reggaeton and pop and drink trashy drinks from a balcony. I wouldn’t have thought of doing those things because from the onset it seemed basic to me. but I kept an open mind, and I was rewarded for it. JTA taught me that there’s more to the world than what I know, or even what my closest friends know. there’s more out there, and I’ll be damned if I don’t at least check it out. my new motto? don’t knock it til you’ve tried it! and who cares if you’ll be called basic? at least I lived it. and if I hated it, at least I can give a good reason why. JTA has made me more unafraid. I am more courageous, I am stronger.

the last point might make you wonder about my first statement of “I never did anything out of character”. if I went out of my comfort zone and did things I wouldn’t normally do, isn’t that...out of character? not really. I realize that it’s something about my personality too. I’m sociable, I keep my friends close, and I’ll do what I can to make them happy. and if they invite me to go clubbing from time to time, then why not? if it won’t put me in danger, why not? and honestly, pop and reggaeton are fun to dance to anyway. and I did enjoy myself ☺️

so that’s JTA to me. I’m surprised I actually got words out. wow...my JTA experience was incredibly enriching!

I’m still reeling over what my professor Chris said about me when he complemented me about my paper (aaaaaaah still not over that!!!). “you write very well. thanks for taking the time to do this, i rarely comment on students papers but this was really good.” wow!!!! that really boosted my self-esteem. i don’t know why that came up...i guess i just remembered it since i’m surprised that i got to write this long about my JTA. oh well. at least that proud moment was recorded here!

well. this was supposed to be a boring little post about what i’ve been doing these last few days, because I can already hear myself going “what did I even do for that last week??”

well chelsea, here you go:

friday: that last really easy sociology exam that everyone else found difficult. you stayed quiet about it, so don’t worry. also legina’s last day, so you went to 100 Montaditos with her and Abel. you were sad, deep down. there was some street performer playing really sentimental instrumental music and you video-ed it and included a shot of the trees. it felt like the end of an era saying goodbye to Legina and Abel. in a way, it kind of was. you promised you’d meet them sometime next year though.

ninong dok and tita blanche were there, so you had dinner with them.

saturday: you had dinner with bianca’s mom and our barcelona parents aka javier and mercedes! what did you do in the morning? only God knows now. oh! I think you spent some time in the beach, but only on the benches above, not really on it.

sunday: you went to church in the morning. for the first time in almost 2 months, you walked going there and back. you tried the new italian yogurt shop. it was ok.

you met up again with ninong and tita for dinner at the place they considered “the best tapas of their whole trip”. you doubted where else they had tapas, because that particular resto wasn’t sooOOOO amazing. it was good though!

it was also sant joan’s feast (which i just found out translates to St John’s??? wow) so even if you were incredibly scared and magugulatin with the fireworks, you braved walking alone to the beach after dinner. it was worth it. you got to see the fireworks on the beach and the groups of friends spread out on picnic cloths over the beach. the techno music was pretty good too. you wished Legina and the other koreans and Raya were there so that you could’ve stayed at the beach too. oh well, though. what could you do? also you thought the fireworks were pretty supot. tbh.

monday: you started packing today. you got pretty tired after and i think you just played sims. it was your last night with ninong, and they very kindly invited and paid for you to join them at their Flamenco show + dinner. dinner was alright, it was a buffet type thing. not the best, but not so bad. you also had a lot of wine which made you incredibly sleepy for the first half of the flamenco show. you tried to hide it but I don’t think you were that successful. it was a good show though, and you liked it better than the first one you watched with your parents. afterward, you and sina ninong visited Placa Reial and had one more round of beers. it was a nice night, and you took some funny pictures at the plaza. it was chill. it was nice being there, because you and bianca would never have bought drinks and sat on that square (too expensive). you said goodbye to ninong dok and tita blanche.

tuesday-wednesday: you stayed home to study for international journalism in the morning and then either do sims or watch Someone Great on netflix at night.

thursday (the day I’m writing this): you took the international journalism test in the morning. went okaaaaay. Chris gave you back your reading test (you finally got something other than 7 -- you got 9.5! score!) and said very kindly “well, have a good life.” it was touching, in its detached way.

you said good bye to giulia too. now her, I don’t know when you’ll see. but I’ll miss her. you hugged twice, because you knew it was going to be a while til you saw her.

then you ate Nice Spice and got menu del dia because you craved curry. you got really full. then you went back to glories to buy celio and massimo for dad. you decided to walk with all the bags back to the flat, and it was really hot and hard to do. u put on girl power music halfway through to power you on. it kinda worked. you rested for a bit (oh! you’ve been watching alex gonzaga videos throughout the week. you found the asylum manila video really funny) then went back and started shopping for yourself. you came back with xistorra and milk (the two loves of your JTA, tbh. plus choco flakes). javier very kindly gave a fan for your room (does he have a fan for himself??? i hope so :( i’m gonna miss barcelona dad) and offered you a beer. Estrella. nice guy. you had dinner on the terrace. and now you’re here, on the bed, listening to your “while driving” playlist and writing. it’s a lot better than playing sims, haha.

tomorrow you have SG with Claire, then you’re gonna call mom (biological mom hahaha) to shop for her and your siblings. and you’re probably gonna finish some of your own shopping too. and then you and javier are going to order ham.

not so bad, eh? more or less I did do something everyday, see! but reading it again makes me sad again because...it really is ending. my friends are all leaving, and there’s nothing to look forward to in Spain anymore. I mean sure, there’s shopping and packing but those are things for going home. nothing for being here. I still plan on going to Laberint D’Horta, but I’m not as game for it as I used to be, so let’s see. maybe a last walk to ciutadella park would be nice. if only it weren’t so hot. we shall see.

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chelseaonjta-blog · 6 years ago

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Morocco part 2

so i’m a little pissed at tumblr right now because it’s a little hassle to upload photos and post on this blog :---) but whatever let’s continue!

DAAAAY 3!

i don’t know why i sound so excited about Day 3 in Morocco because it wasn’t so eventful. we just went around the market and bought some really nice flats! we also bought more pasalubong for people.

we were supposed to go hammam (Moroccan spa) but we couldn’t book an appointment :( oh well...we can spa elsewhere haha. so we chilled at the hostel in the afternoon, then we went out to the night market.

it was interesting again to see the whole Ramadan thing still going. I forgot to mention, but even in Day 2 when Ibri was hiking with us up the mountain, he was practicing Ramadan. he climbs everyday and he doesn’t drink or eat. I get he’s used to it, but still...wow. their faith really amazes me!

so anyway. I was amazed at how quiet the market gets. I mean really...the night market is hella crowded at any other time of the day and the sellers are close to being hecklers with how annoying and persistent they are. so we were choosing between these two restaurants (we didn’t really have a choice...they were all up in our faces). and after we left the 2 restaurants cause we said we’d decide, immediately 2 or 3 more people came up to us making us check their menus! it was crazy.

we had to move to a more quiet side of the square, hiding ourselves from the food market. we had a hard time choosing, because one guy was young, around 17 years old, and he seemed really sweet and sincere. the other guy though was also sweet, more of a dad figure. he knew stuff about the Philippines too...which was weird and random, but whatever. we flipped a coin and chose 17 year old. we sat and ate, but it was a little confusing and in the end i didn’t super enjoy it hahah. the food was good but the waiter seemed to misunderstand us a lot and we almost ended up paying for way more than we were supposed to. good thing we stopped him!

on our way back to our hostel, we passed by dad figure and he said “oh the filipinos...i hate you guys”. and we were like...wow...I mean I honestly don’t think he meant it, he probably isn’t super good with english so he doesn’t understand how strong the word “hate” is, but it did show me how sensitive the sellers are too. it’s interesting compared to how they are when they first try to get you. they’re so bubbly and friendly and then when you decide not to choose them, they get all rude and hurtful. though I didn’t find it rude as much as...weird.

well, anyway. it wasn’t so bad, and at least we weren’t harmed. i still really enjoyed Morocco - it was a breath of fresh air from Europe, and I sincerely liked all the experiences there. the food, the views, even the people were amazing. it was fun shopping in the market too! definitely one for the books, and a trip I’m really grateful I went on :---) even if i was personally scared and my dad was scared too. but it’s ok - it went well!

pretty colors - the market at night!

yaaay roomie! notice how sweaty I look hahahha

our last meal in morocco - not bad

so I do have a picture of the square! partly hahah well this is also the place where we hid from the sellers hahaha

we had A LOT of juice that trip...it was also pretty cheap though so why not! and some of the juices were actually served cold, so that was great!

the shoe market we went to!

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chelseaonjta-blog · 6 years ago

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the 2 major Ms of my JTA: Morocco

woooo i’m back!

life update: it’s now UPF’s exam week(s), and i have 17 days left in barcelona! i dont know what to feel…now that i’m near the finish line, I feel like time flew by so fast. But I remember being in Feb or March and feeling like time was moving _soooooo _slow. and now that i’m about to leave, I’m starting to REALLY enjoy JTA. i’m starting to make new friends and be closer to them, going on trips i’m really enjoying, seeing a different culture, and being more excited for my classes even! (ok i was always excited about international journalism, but i found my 2nd wind for Spanish outta nowhere and i’m a nerd so i’m actually enjoying doing research for sociology class…)

but anyway. maybe i should look into that deeper. or maybe i won’t, because i’m always so scared of my own feelings hahahahhsskjdnkjsn

so. my 2 major Ms – Morocco and Madrid!!!! first:

Morocco

yo. I loved Morocco! what a different experience. I, being dumb, didn’t even consider that it wasn’t part of the EU. I knew it was in Africa, but for some reason I thought it was part of the EU???? i don’t know, man, i don’t know. i was suddenly hit by the fact that I was in Africa when I landed. About time, I know but…wow. this goes without saying, but being in Africa is so different from being in Europe. and I loved it. I loved being away from picture perfect Europe, where everything was so similar that it started getting boring.

Morocco reminded me a lot of Manila. It was hot, it was crazy, there were sketchy people and people trying to sell you stuff everywhere. It was Manila but in Africa. And I think that’s why I appreciated it a lot more than I would’ve if I had come in March or something. I think I came at the perfect time too because it was end of May, right after a slew of trips in Europe and I was starting to get bored with how old and stuffy Europe was.

I guess it made me miss home too. It was all so Manila-esque. Manila’s probably a little better than Morocco, but the vibe was definitely there.

oh and legina went with us too! so that was really fun. she’s a lot of fun to be with!

so the first day we went to this palace thing which wasn’t really all that great. i don’t remember much of it really…i guess i’m over the whole palace thing hahaha. then we ate some REALLY good food. i remember the food from morocco really well…

Tajine is AMAZING. its like chicken/beef/lamb roasted in vegetables and herbs cooked in this special pot. and it was heaven. so we had our first tajine then we walked around Jemaa Al-Fna and bought some really good shakes! Moroccans are extremely sensitive though - we bought from this one guy and on our way to his stall we ignored the neighboring stall. the neighbour started looking dirty at us and getting angry that we were taking pictures with the drinks and with our food stall guy named…Anas (I think that was his name). that didn’t stop us though – picturing we went!

couldn’t get a picture of the main square, it was so hectic but hahaha it was all very salmon colored and fruit stands.

what made this trip for me though was something that happened at night. Morocco’s predominantly Muslim, and they were nearing the end of Ramadan by the time we went. at around 6pm, we got hungry and asked the hostel lady if we could order dinner at the hostel. she said ok, but that she would only start cooking at 8pm, because before then she’d be preparing for the end of day Ramadan feast. and so we sat there while she prepared and converted half the lobby into a dinner area. and it was SOOO cool. at the end of ramadan there’s this really loud sound that goes through the entire city. it’s not a pretty sound, it sounds short of that emergency sound that means you need to evacuate immediately. and right at that time, it’s like everyone stops. we walked around on day 2 and 3 and really...everyone is QUIET at this time because they’re all eating. so the hostel people all gathered together to start eating. it wasn’t noisy or whatever, it was just a meal shared by people who worked together who had the same faith. it looked a lot like a family. everyone was just quiet when they ate, but there was an air of solemnity there.

it amazed me how these people (and almost everyone in Morocco) could practice their faith without anyone telling them to do so. they literally dropped everything to eat at the end of the day (understandable cause they were hungry)...which meant that they really did fast for the rest of the day. and they weren’t just at home or whatever: they were working people. they had jobs. they got tired. they had to deal with their 37-40 degree heat and not eat a thing. they couldn’t even have water. what faith and loyalty these people had!!

day 2!

day 2 was alot of fun. we booked this airbnb experience thing - credits to bianca for always finding such nice and cheap things to do.

we got to do a lot of fun things. i was wondering what to wear because the description said there would be a hike involved, but because of how hot it was i wanted to wear a dress (also cause i didn’t bring appropriate pants). i went for it. i wore the dress. and no regrets!

it was an extremely fun day, and it was something i wouldn’t find anywhere else. our host, Ibri, was super fun and welcoming. he brought us first to this camel place. I RODE A CAMEL!!! which is a big feat for me because i’m uneasy around animals. we got to wear these cool costumes too.

it was pretty cool. then after our camel ride we had Moroccan tea. I love Moroccan tea now - it makes me relaxed. plus they like to put sugar so of course I like that too hehe. we then went to this Argan oil cooperative where we tried different sauces with our bread -- the sauces were Argan oil, olive oil, this peanut butter-y thing and honey. all really good, and even the olive oil tasted a lot richer than regular oil! i got some argan oil and argan soap too. can’t wait to try it!

^ our view otw to the cooperative. where else can you find places like this?!

we then went to start our hike. it wasn’t too hard, but there were some parts that made me lose my breath. but it was all worth it! we passed by a waterfall too on our way up. it was all so beautiful and real. i definitely wouldn’t have gotten this anywhere else. maybe for this one pictures do speak a thousand words:

the last one: Ibri’s view from his HOUSE TERRACE. beautiful!!!

then we had lunch at Ibri’s place. his “lovely mother” (as stated in the airbnb description) cooked for us. and wow...it was great.

yes, that last one is just monggo with...bread. weird but good! and that was an appetizer! it was an amazing experience, and i’m really glad we took it. i really would not have experience this anywhere else. and _that’s _the kind of feeling i was looking for when i went on JTA. after being around Europe and seeing the same designs and the same _vibe _from everywhere, I was relieved to finally be somewhere else.

after lunch, we hiked backed down and said goodbye to Ibri. we then went to our hostel and rested for a bit (it was so hot). we then talked a bit with Bruno, a Portuguese guy who is super friendly but who was pretty talkative. he apparently travels a loooot. he came to manila, and he super enjoyed _Manila. _not Boracay, not Palawan (he went there too) but MANILA. what a guy. after Morocco, he was going to Madrid, then Norway, South Africa, South Korea...we all thought this guys was rich. we’re probably right. he was really friendly...for the other girls, he was a little too friendly. but i think that we’re just not used to this hostel kind of culture. it’s shocking for me, but to my merit (or detriment), i just go along with people’s trip. or better in filipino - hindi ako nagbabasag ng trip. which sometimes sucks for me because people are joking and i pretend to take them seriously on whatever dumb shit they’re doing and they think i believe them :< well . that’s what i get for being nice...HAHAHA well it’s not a bad thing. but i digress (as always!)

so anyway we went out again and tried some really good night market food. it was a lot cooler at night too, so it was enjoyable to walk around. it was a pleasant evening!

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chelseaonjta-blog · 6 years ago

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wrapped in love

soooo I just had this thought after my morning prayers today. I was praying for the consas and the LC priests and at first I said, “may they continue to shine for You” like the poetic and dramatic person that I am. After I said it though, I immediately changed it to “may they continue to burn with the warmth of your love. Shining tires people out, but being wrapped in warmth requires consistency.” For some reason, I always imagine love as fire, but after what I said in prayer I realize it’s not really for the light that fire brings that makes me think of love -- it’s the warmth you get from it. You’re comfortable in warmth. You’re safe.

And when I started thinking about love as warmth, I started being immediately grateful for the people around me. Everyone I’m close to in RC, of course, is obviously on the list. I wouldn’t be this “secure/established” in my life (in the sense that I’m not doing anything to actively ~ destroy ~ my life and I’m pretty content with where I am and where I think I’m going). But throughout these 5 months being away from them, I realize how much I am loved by them. Not in a braggy, conceited way, but in the way that my sisters, the consas, even those I’m not super close to, constantly check up on me even through IG. I’ve been busy the past 5 months with video calls from different people in the community, and I’m almost always chatting with at least one of them (I talk to Gabbie every day so I guess that helps a lot with that point). I am wrapped in their love, even if I’m so far from home. Even if I’m so far from them. And that love is what has allowed me to keep the faith, to continue this pursuit even when it’s hard and everyone in Europe acts like it isn’t necessary.

And then I thought about my immediate family, and I was overwhelmed. I’ve always known they loved me, but now it seems so much more apparent because we’re far apart. My parents keep in touch with me all the time, and today I was struck by how my dad cared so deeply for me. Again, this is a pretty obvious thing and it’s not like he didn’t care before. But I was just overwhelmed by how much their love stretches past familiarity, comfort zones, and geographic locations. They love me even when I’m far away. My dad isn’t a feelings person, and he would never readily show me how he really feels (especially in the sappy love stuff) but it meant a lot to me that he would constantly ask me to call when I’m free so I can make kwento about my latest trip or so that he can raise up some concerns he has while I’m here (like how he doesn’t want me to travel alone, even within Spain) -- it can be a downer, but I realize that it’s him showing how much he wants me safe, how much he loves me.

I almost cried in prayer, but I’m not much of a cryer or a feelings person either. I was filled with extreme gratitude. I ended my prayer by thanking God for bringing me such amazing people in my life, who constantly wrapped me in love and shaped me into who I am. Because who I am is also dependent on who they are, and who they are is already pretty amazing.

I see love as a warm fire, and it’s mainly because I have been wrapped in that kind of love that I can see it that way.

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chelseaonjta-blog · 6 years ago

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how I travel

just some things i’ve noticed about myself when I travel lolz

i like to chill - looking at shops, walking around, sitting, eating. i don’t constantly have to be on the move, but i at least don’t wanna stay in the hotel/hostel all the time. i’d rather be out, exploring the city, kahit sitting in a park somewhere. I have this huge thing with “soaking up” the experiences of a city, and I do as much as I can to achieve that.

i know what i want to see, and that’s it. I don’t really need an itinerary. sure, I can be a little atat when it comes to logistics, but then I know now (better than before) how being clueless about transportation can really make your trips more expensive. generally though, i just have an idea of what i want to do, and i just go for it. i don’t always need something to do immediately after.

i’m up for adventure too. this is related to the “soaking up” thing. i love trying new things! i love seeing new things! it doesn’t matter if it requires a hike or something, i’m down for it.

i don’t mind spending a little extra on trips. i wanna make it count! this may be kind of weird to others, but really i just want to enjoy my travels. i don’t want to go places just to say that i’ve been there. i want to bring home stories, memories, real things that i did or tried while i was there. i don’t want to be too kuripot or cheap that i end up missing out on something unique to that country or city. when you’re there, in that moment, the biggest question is “why not?” and oftentimes I can’t think of answer.

i’m tired of the instagram culture. i don’t mind taking pictures, and i’m suuuuper happy when i get a good shot, but at this point i’m so done with having to update my stories, having to put highlights, having to choose the right photo, etc. i hate having to put on a show. who cares, anyway? i’d rather be in the moment and just look around, and take pictures that aren’t IG worthy but are meaningful to me. this isn’t to say, of course, that just cause you take IG worthy photos it means you can’t enjoy your trips. but sometimes, people take it too far and what’s on IG just ends up being totally fake. and i don’t want that anymore. i don’t think i’ve ever wanted that. i’ve always striven for authenticity, and i think that its through my trips that i’ve realized how far off it is for others, and how social media can sometimes get in the way.

eating. my main priority in any place is food. i’m matakaw. i don’t know how to defend myself, or if i even should. but i think one thing that makes a country/city unique is its cuisine, and i’ll be damned if i don’t at least try their specialties!

i care very much about how i go to the toilet. this sounds kinda weird, but it’s true. i’m always thinking about how i can get a spare water bottle that i can use for my toilet time. it seems awkward, but cmon it does get really uncomfortable when you have to hold it in for days. missions has taught me to let it go (lolz) as soon as possible.

i like having someone to talk to. i like trips with a kasama. it makes things a lot more fun and interesting because it’s not just limited to what I want to do, but I get to do things that I wouldn’t normally think of doing. so that’s pretty cool. I haven’t tried doing a solo trip though, so maybe I should do that first before getting ahead of myself...

i don’t really know what this post was about, but I guess I’m on a roll from the last post and now i’m obsessed with making lists. at least (again) i’m starting to write! i will try to make this more regular now. kind of late, considering I have around a month and a week before JTA ends, but hey at least i’m still trying, right?

i’ll be back! ciao!

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chelseaonjta-blog · 6 years ago

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a list of all the weird/stupid things i have done so far on JTA (in case i forget)

i’m pretty tired right now because i just came back from italy and the bologna airport. i say those are two different things because one of them is something i truly, really love (italy) and the other one is a weird and grueling experience that is the reason for the creation of this list (bologna airport).

i wanted to list down all my memories on trips, like my itineraries etc first, but since i’m not that masipag yet and am prone to laziness and forgetfulness, when writing this came into my head, i was immediately more excited to write it and i decided to just go for it. so here it is, my weird list of Things I Wouldn’t Have Done If I Weren’t On JTA (alternatively, Things I Would Never Have HAD To Do if It Weren’t for JTA).

- sleep at an airport. this takes the cake, really (so far -- i still have morocco to go!). i guess it was also in the choice of airport i decided to sleep at, but let me tell you, Bologna Airport should not be high up on your “Airports to Sleep At” list. Really. I don’t consider myself very snooty or fresa, and I’ve braved through a lot of gross things. But this. I couldn’t take it. I guess it was through this that I realized I’m not that type of person who can just sleep anywhere. I need to be horizontal, man. It doesn’t even have to be a bed, just something I can lie on. We arrived at bologna at around 1:30, found a cab (ooh, that should go on the list too...more details later) and arrived at around 2am. I tried to sleep. I really did. I just couldn’t. I slept for, at most, an hour, between 2am and 6am. I was sitting, trying to position my backpack and my Italian plates (which were pasalubong and I still have no regrets about buying) while trying to get my upper body and lower body in a comfortable enough position. It just wasn’t possible. Maybe I’m just too long ? which sounds funny, but rly. neither my upper nor lower body could fit in one seat of the chairs, and if i curled myself up on the chair it was just ... difficult. so i ended up sleeping like i would on a bus, except it wasn’t a bus and i was bothered that i had to sleep this way at all. this may sound really angry, but to be honest, i’m not at all. really. i can’t really describe what i felt, it wasn’t really frustration, it was just...grueling. which isn’t really a feeling but...it is what it is. so there i couldn’t sleep, and then when the airport opened and we went past immigration, we found more comfortable seats (these ones actually had cushions on them -- oh yes, the ones we were trying to sleep on at first had no cushion, just metal. it was those chairs you find right in front of check-in counters) and i could sleep better, even if i was curled up and was using my backpack as a pillow (which i had put on the seat beside me...i think at this point i just said fuck it to stranger danger, pickpocketing, stealing, and thieves. i just wanted to close my eyes.) so i slept a little bit more, having 30 minute naps. and then we boarded, and i slept the whole flight. and i tried to go to class. but that’s another point, i think. for this one, it’s very simple: chelsea can’t sleep all night at airports. or chairs.

sidenote: bianca slept fine. i’m truly amazed

- walk around bologna at 1:30am figuring out the cab system. it was quite a stressful early morning, even before the whole airport situation. i didnt know how taxis worked in bologna, which shouldnt have been a problem because they should work like anywhere else in the world, except they didn’t. apparently you’re supposed to call one in advance, and its not common to just flag one down on the street. happy ending for this one though, because on my 2nd try we got one! God BLESS that man. idek how true the whole “u can’t flag one on the street” thing is, but if it is, TYG for this not-so-ugly/kinda cute (he wasn’t cute, but he wasn’t what you’d call pogi) taxi driver. and he had CARD

- oh yeah...which leads me to number 3: pay for a 10euro gelato. guys. it wasn’t even that good. bianca and i were going around florence, looking for cheap gelato. we went to 3 different stores, comparing prices. 4 euro for the smallest size was too expensive for us. so we got excited when we saw this place had gelato for 2.5. steaaal!! we got cups, but then it was only after that i realized that he didn’t get the 2.5 cup...he got the 10 euro cup. :---) and the cannoli, which the dude said was only 1 euro, turned out to be 7 euros. :---) maybe he didn’t say 1 euro, maybe he said 7 but we didn’t hear...either way, i ended up not having cash on hand anymore for the rest of the day. and that was around 11am. :---) and that is how i found out the hard way that most Florentine stores only accept cash. i CRY for my 13.5 euros. it would have saved me a lot of grief later on.

what type of grief? the grief i am currently in as i type this. ok, it isn’t grief. but let’s call it that for now. as i mentioned on my finsta-finsta IG, aka the mobile and easier access version of this blog, I didn’t want to sleep in the afternoon because it would mess up my sleeping sched, so i decided i would go to my spanish class at 3pm. too bad i ended up taking a nap and waking up AT 3PM. which was fine, i mean all spanish people are late and its not uncommon to have people come a little later than usual, even to classes. but i still had to buy a T-10. i had prepared for this -- i had both my card and 50 euros so i could buy a card. neither worked on the machine. i’m kinda worried about my card, it didn’t work on the airport machine either (bianca had to double use her T-10, bless her), but whatever. it worked on the bologna taxi...should be fine. anyway, by the time i tried all 3 machines and decided to give up, it was 3:15 and i felt that even if i did go to class, it would be waaaay too late, even for the spanish. so i called it a day. i broke my 50 by buying ben&jerry’s, bought a T-10 with the loose change (so i wouldn’t have to go through this shit again) and went back to the apartment. like i said on my ig, ben&jerry’s is my alcohol.

but i digress

- get fined. ok, this one’s on me. and bianca. we deserved it. we were so aware of how much we deserved it that we didn’t even get mad anymore. I mean, we really deserved it. so rewind to 2 days before the gelato and the airport, and we’re in rome. we’re on the bus, and we notice that absolutely no one is validating their bus tickets, and the bus is packed. the driver doesn’t even know who goes in or out. so we decide to just not punch in our cards. big mistake. really, BIIIIIIIIIG MISTAKE. out of all the buses, the police decide to climb on to ours (ok fine..it was crowded, we were otw to Vatican which meant a lot of tourists, etc. etc.). and of course we were caught with unvalidated tickets. so we had to pay a fine...54.9euros to be exact. TYG it could be paid by card or I would’ve cried, because the fee of paying it somewhere else other than the time of getting caught was around 100+ euros. well i already felt bad about losing 54.9 euros, but again, I deserved it. so take note, kids ! be good citizens, ALWAYS ! validate those cards!

- run like hell to catch a bus. i had the paris incident in mind, but i realize that that’s happened a lot to biancs and i. but the paris one is GOLD -- we wanted to watch the eiffel tower sparkle, and we calculated it would sparkle at 8pm. Our Flixbus (best company tbh) was schedule to leave at 8:42 pm. accdg to google maps, it would take us 40-42 minutes to get to the station. so we had to be quick. at 8:00 sharp, the lights sparkled, we gasped, took some pictures, then RAN. i can still visualize the scene. a live performer was playing “can’t help falling in love”, it was already dark (of course), and there were so many tourists milling around. there were also a lot of street sellers. through all of that, suddenly one of the 7 of us (i think it was me tbh), shouted “run run run!!!” and OFF WE WENT ya’ll. through that thick crowd, 7 girls just darting around like mice. we kinda separated a bit at the metro, cause some of the girls thought our entrance would be different, but me and some others stuck to the one we were already going down on. the other girls ran all the way to the other side. when we got down to the station, the girls were also getting down, just on the other side. basically, pointless to go around. trust me, if i wasn’t paranoid about missing the bus, i would’ve laughed. it was actually pretty funny, the whole thing. i remember running the length of the station (our bus stop was at the back) and feeling like i would die. i had never run so fast in my life (i think). we made it, just in time.

- which leads me to another moment i thought i would die: going through Amsterdam’s King’s Day crowd. that shit was wild. that’s as precise as I can be. it was WILDT. that was some stupid, crazy shit. we had just met up with parsley, gabe, shar, and christine. or to be more precise, we met up with the first three and the latter was just pissed to see us. (more on that ...soon lol) and ...ok to be honest, i don’t even remember where we were supposed to go. all i remember is, Gabe or Shar started the navigation, and it led us to the edge of this street concert party thing. when I say “street”, I mean the whole street was occupied with tall white people. the street was actually quite narrow, which made everything worse because the King’s Day people had erected a stage there, so there was a concert going on, and what seemed like a live broadcast of that concert. PLUS, on the other side of the stage, the street was lined with bars. and it was King’s Day. you can imagine the complete chaos. everyone was either drunk, high, or both. it was incredibly crowded. the street was packed, there were people from the bars who were coming out to join in, and there were people who were trying to move through the crowd. we were one of those people. i’ve been through incredibly ...sticky and crowded situations in my life. I’ve ridden the MRT at ultra mega rush hour, I’ve attended enough rock concerts. I thought I would be prepared for something like this. I wasn’t. the crowd was iba, I had never experienced anything like it. It was kind of like MRT at that rush hour, except everyone was MOVING, and you didn’t really want to stay there. at least in the MRT, when ur pushed against other people, no one really moves until the next stop. here, everyone seemed like they wanted to go somewhere else, or were moving to the music or whatever. there was just too much movement. at one point, i wasn’t even moving my legs. the crowd was swaying me along, and yes, I mean swaying. we were going from left to right, kind of suffocating-pushing our way through. oddly, i felt like the band was just repeating songs, and their reactions were being controlled or something. whatever -- all i know is, it was crazy fucking scary. i try not to curse anymore (haha, i know) but i can’t describe King’s Day without expletives. it was just too...WILD. I’m still thankful I even made it out alive. I really thought I would die at some point.

- ah, amsterdam, what else is there to do? oh yeah, get high. this seems pretty basic considering everything else on this list, but really. I don’t think I would’ve ever tried weed if I hadn’t gone on JTA. I didn’t really wanna do it, plus it was still illegal in the PH and I didn’t wanna get caught up in that. but hey, it was Amsterdam, it was totally legal. I actually wanna amend my earlier point and be more specific: get high on a boat. that was actually kind of fun. we were doing this canal tour thing, and we had eaten the edibles an hour before getting on. to the merit of biancs and i, i think we were still very good clients. it was the nighttime tour on the canal, so everyone else was either drunk, high, or romantically involved. trust me, biancs and i were the most behaved ones there. we would pretend to listen, nod and laugh when we felt it appropriate, and converse with the hosts. it was a good experience. even better? the food and wine on the boat. there’s no better way to say this, but we demolished that buffet. 3 plates filled high with sausages, crackers, and cheese and we only left some for the others (the others didn’t seem to mind though, because like i said, they were knee-deep in the other 3 reasons above). there were free-flowing drinks too, and biancs and i shared with 3 other girls, and i think we had 5 bottles all in all. so like...one bottle each. it was a good time. i felt myself getting slower once i was hit, but wow. i thoroughly enjoyed that. the host even gave me a lei at the end of the tour! maybe he appreciated our participation. or maybe he just knew we were high.

i was high when we were going through the King’s Day crowd too, but that was less...enjoyable. i think that once we were in the crowd, i kinda snapped out of it and focused on not dying. yeah, that was kind of a waste. but hey, generally i had a good time.

- get drunk on 1 euro carton wine. this was actually super fun. its one of those things that become tradition immediately after you start it. it started when bianca bought carton red wine. i think we got pretty drunk off of it, and i vaguely remember going back to the supermarket (yes, the supermarket was still open, which meant...it was pretty early) to buy another one, which we also finished. then all hell broke loose. we started getting noisy, we called pars and gabe, we went to the kitchen and stole strawberries from one of our then-flatmates, Maria (who was honestly really nice), and I accidentally turned on the lights in Marion’s room while she was there. she actually came out and told me that i had turned it on, and all i kept saying was “sorry, sorry”. this was all before the flatmate drama, i think. (lol that’s another story too, i guess). oh and this all happened while we were on the phone with sina gabe. bianca went inside the “coat room” of the apartment and stole someone’s hat (at the time we thought it was manon’s, but it could actually be javier’s??? still don’t know until now, tbh). then we went back into our room and...decided that we wanted to sleep in the empty room beside us. so we tried first to enter it through the adjacent balcony, didn’t work. so we got the keys box and started trying out different keys until we found the one that fit and we just....slept there. didn’t do anything nasty, didn’t trash the place. just...fell asleep. i don’t know if i should be thankful or confused that drunk chelsea and bianca’s idea of a wild night is sleeping in an empty bedroom right beside ours. not even a hotel or another flat, but literally the one that pretty much looks like ours. yeaaah, i don’t know either. that was pretty fun though, biancs and i got to bond and i guess it solidified our reverence for the carton wine. it tastes like shit, but it does its job.

- have trashy tinto-vodka nights with raya. this is steadily becoming Chelsea’s JTA Greatest Hits list, but whatever. i’m enjoying this trip down memory lane. to be fair, i only had 2 trashy wine nights with Raya, when she was still in her old condo and my parents hadn’t come/bianca and I didn’t have a trip on the weekend, but it was one of the best nights. it was honestly really fun, just getting to know and bonding with Raya. I hadn’t known her so well pre-JTA, and when we were thinking of getting a room together (me, bianca, and Raya), I wasn’t so sure how that would play out. but after bonding with her, I realized that Raya and I vibed pretty well. we were into the same stupid shit and laughed at the same nonsense things. so sleeping over at her place and getting drunk was honestly really fun. it wasn’t even wild or anything, it was just...~ hearty fun ~. we’d try to invite bianca sometimes, but she’d always say no LOL mainly cause raya’s place is quite far from us and she didn’t want to sleep over (but biancs is totally fine sleeping at an airport?? i don’t understand, but hey, you do you.) and raya and i would also cook sinigang! ok fine, we cooked it on one day only, but after having it for lunch then getting tipsy, we decided we wanted more so we made another batch at around midnight. we both agreed it tasted a lot better. gooooooood times.

- having to walk Amsterdam alone at night. sorry i jumped back into amsterdam, i just totally forgot about this. this was actually a big deal for me, even though in summary it wasn’t so special. i had had to wake up at around 3am that day so i could walk and catch the bus that would bring me to the Flixbus station. i was worried because amsterdam had had shit weather the day before and i was contemplating taking an uber, but in the end i decided to walk. it was only a 20-minute walk, which in daytime wouldn’t have bothered me. but since it was nighttime and the airbnb wasn’t in city center, i was kind of afraid. i’m matatakutin pa naman. i imagine shadows becoming figures and am generally uneasy in the dark. but at the time i thought, u gotta do what u gotta do, right? so i trudged on. and honestly, it wasn’t bad at all. i saw no one on my walk, and i realize in hindsight that if i had walked in the morning, i would have enjoyed it a lot. i got to see the river and some pretty cute, homey houses. there were parts where it was eerily dark and quiet, but overall i didn’t feel pressured too much. i don’t know why this is a big deal for me, and i feel like it’s silently a landmark experience for me. i guess because it was something i had no choice but to do alone (bianca had left earlier, gabe and pars were asleep and staying another day in amsterdam), and i had to face my fears. alone. epitome of JTA, I guess. well, it ended fine though, and overall I think I grew from the experience. I guess I realized there that I have some of my own inner strength that I can rely on, and that what scares me sometimes is...nothing, really. that I make things up in my head and I’m too praning, but really, there’s nothing to be afraid of.

- get in trouble with an airbnb. technically this wasn’t me, because it was under parsley’s name, but we all felt this. amsterdam really was something else...

anyway, parsley booked the place, but she only put it down for 2 guests, when we were...six. everything was going well until the owner apparently saw parsley and the lille girls going out all together, and the owner messaged pars about it saying that she (pars) has to pay a fine of 25E/night. the owner only saw 4 people though, so i guess that was a silver lining? so that added to the general stress of amsterdam, post-Heineken Experience. christine made pars tell this lie about the other 2 people only staying a night, but the owner then said that she saw four bags in the airbnb. which was weird, considering our airbnb was separated from the main house and was locked, so that meant that the owner went inside to check herself. invasion of privacy right there...the owner even made up this story about a socket burning out in our airbnb, which is why she had to go and check. though when we went back, everything was ok...well, we were also in the wrong anyway. we told the owner that the other bags did belong to 2 people, but that they would soon leave because they had early flights, which technically wasn’t a lie. so it ended up that we had to strategically get in and out of the airbnb. it would all be fine by sunday, because bianca was leaving sat night and pars, gabe, and i were leaving early sunday morning. we just had to time our ins and outs so that if ever there was someone checking on us from the main house window, s/he’d only count two people. it was pretty intense, the tension in that place. not just cause of the owner, but also cause of some people in the airbnb. but that story, maybe for another time.

- getting drunk on port wine. oh, PORTO. I love that place, really. it still has my heart, 6 countries and 9 cities later. it was a great first trip (that i should probably recount soon, before memory fails me and i forget the tiny things about it that i loved). one of the reasons why it was so good was because of port wine. and all i can say is...beshie. sarap shet. really, nothing quite like it. i still remember that one of them tasted like maple syrup, no joke. the others tasted....i don’t know how to describe it anymore, but one was incredibly fruity and one was oaky without tasting outright like a barrel. it was amazing. it was delicious, the best wine i’ve ever had. it was also 20% alcohol content. and we had 3 glasses. we got pretty hit after that, and what made it kinda go away was our mad rush towards a building tour that wasn’t that good anyway. but nonetheless, it was extremely good wine. I still can’t forget it, and at the nearest opportunity I jump at the chance to go back. Porto definitely isn’t one of those cities that a lot of people think of instantly when you say “Europe trip”, but I say it should be. One of the cheapest, beautiful, and most relaxing trips ever. I never would have considered it myself, were it not for its close proximity to Spain.

- see how the french dance. this is more of an afterthought, and honestly not as hard hitting as the other things on the list, but wow. the french dance weird. i will forever laugh at that video of gabe and pars copying them because it’s so spot on. it’s really some sort of robotic, zombie move thing that’s equally fascinating and equally scary. I definitely would not have known about it if I hadn’t been on JTA, going to clubs with my friends.

- tried to make coffee without water. yep, this goes on the list of stupid for sure. so javier has this coffee maker that i’ve never even seen before, and when he explained how to use it, he didn’t mention anything about putting water in the bottom. so when i tried to do it on my own, i did exactly as he told me. of course, without water, the thing just started burning. i think i was too late to realize it, because i had already begun to smell the burning. when i took it off the stove and laid it on the towel, the towel just straight up burned. as in the coffee maker scorched a hole through the damn towel. i felt pretty stupid in that moment, and honestly really scared for my life that Javier would be angry and would rethink this whole “letting us stay for an extra 3 months” thing (yeah, I realize now that I’m actually a pretty paranoid person). thankfully, he just laughed it off and cleaned it for me, and was even nice enough to make a new batch of coffee for me. God bless the man. the next batch of coffee still tasted burnt though, so i had to thoroughly clean the coffeemaker afterward. phew, that was a close one though. I thought I had really fucked things up at that point.

- lost money without explanation? this is a question mark because i don’t really know how this happened. it started when i was short by 200 euros after my parents left, even though i didn’t use any of my own money when my parents were here and they had given me more cash. i let that go and just offset it. then the next time i counted, i was missing 50 euros naman? like HUH ? I can get pretty magastos, but when I’m cheap I’m cheap af. I knew I hadn’t spent that money anywhere, yet here it was being missing. I don’t know either, maybe there was something off from my counting from the beginning? either way, I’m still sad I can’t find it anymore :///

- thought i lost 20 euros to the laundry machine demon. i straight up didn’t go to that laundry shop for like 3-4 months because i thought the machine had swallowed my 20 euros when all it needed was 3 euros. later on, i found out that there was actually a lot of balance left on that card, because the 20 euros wasn’t swallowed up, it was charged to the card! TYG!!!! i was really happy the day i found out. also kinda sad cause i spent a looot of months hand washing or just not washing because i didn’t want to go to the shop.

- sleeping in hostels. ok, i know i said i wasn’t fresa, but i never really would’ve considered hostels and been so positive about them if it weren’t for JTA. I’m honestly really loving the hostel vibe. the people are friendly, its communal, its pretty clean, and you get cheap accommodation. i guess this isn’t really a weird or stupid thing to do on JTA, but I just find it...cool how much my perspective has changed on traveling. (maybe that should be my next post?) and again, i don’t think i would have done this if not for JTA. so thanks, JTA, for letting me experience that :)

I think that’s it...for now. We still have morocco next week, and amidst the polarizing opinions about it (”it’s one of my greatest trips, u should go!” vs “be more careful, there are more sketchy people there”), I’m kinda excited. I hope I get to relax a little more, because I think that’ll be our last out of Spain trip. I can’t believe we thought of going to Germany pa after Morocco. I would’ve died of tiredness. anyway, that’s all I can remember for now. soon, I’ll try to add pictures and finally start recapping our trips. I think it will do me a lot of good in the future if I at least record my JTA experiences.

ciao!

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