chestscrolls

[chestscrolls]

Dear Diary, we back?

Not sure what im going to write about here but ill simply continue and see how it feels. How do I feel? IDK. Side note: I'm going to try and not bpress backspace on this and just type no edits nothing. anyways i feel weird. i feel empty. i feel like im not where i wasnt to be in life and i dont see a very clear bpath for me to get there. not sure where i mean why i feel this way. i have a great job but i feel kind of stuck. that shouldnt effect how i feel though. i still have no hoes. i cant make deep connections with [eople. i dont have as good of a relationship with people i care about as i want. i talk one way and act another. i feel weird. anther thing that i should probably address. i read my blogs from like 3-4 years ago and i am literally the exact same as i was then. i was trying to make a difference in my life. i wanted to change things for myself. I wanted to become more confident more outgoing work on cool ass things talk to more girls get more puss. i'm literally in hthe exact same position now as i was then. why the fuck is that? this is seriously a problem. not quite a wake up call yet but atm im just saddened. what have i done for my younger self? how do I make my younger self proud? if anything ive regressed even more tbh, im starting to care about stupid bullshit i have no business caring about and ever never was the type of person to spend time thinking about like expensive clothers, posting lavish things on my instagram story, chasing girls. how do i recenter so i can aim and ifire with velocity? I don't want to make this life a forgetable one by any means. i know i really want to work on the dopest projects i possibly can i know i want to sleep with and be around the most beautiful women i can i know i was to WANT to meet and hang out/befriedns with the coolest people i possibly can. Let me understand what the fuck is keeping me from doing this all???? is there anything? wow i really went directly in exstinetial pcrisis on this one. didnt even give an update on my life or anything huh. well its time for me to fuck off and do some more thingking off line. ill be back soon i promise.