chiefinvestigatoremma - Tumblr blog

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

"the world isn't kind" ok??? Much more importantly are you?????

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

Just a timelapse.

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

its so freeing when you realize you can literally write whatever you want 

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

this is what i mean when i say "sniles so sneetly" btw

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

gods greatest punishment was putting 1 trillion cool rocks on earth and no one with eyes big enough to see them all

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

“i don’t know if my blorbo could ever love me-” HE IS UNABLE TO SLEEP AT NIGHT FROM HOW LOVESICK HE IS BECAUSE OF YOU, THE EYE BAGS ARE HORRENDOUS AND HE LOOKS LIKE A DRIED UP BEANSTALK

HELP HIM

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

I miss her…

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

so that's what theyre called

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

Like if you would forgive wormie 😔💔

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

give me your most controversial music opinion

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

I had a cosplayer come up to my table like this and it’s been on my mind ever since

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

The badge as well, is it the rainbow badge?

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

remembering that time i got drunk and told a guy he looked like a wrought iron gate

[chiefinvestigatoremma]

my main requirement in a partner is someone who's willing to "yes, and" me. if i say something completely insane i need them to just pick that up and run with it and commit to the bit until we wind up with a conversation that's funny to us but completely incoherent to everyone within earshot. actually now that i'm typing this out i've realised my ideal relationship might just be "shitty improv comedy duo"