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Daizyn: Mysti, can you help me? All of my clothes keep disappearing for some reason.

Mysti, wearing a hoodie that's 5 times bigger than her size: Spooky.

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Boukon: My only talent is being stress.

Daizyn: Don't you mean stressed?

Boukon: No.

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Mysti: Hey, Gao?

Gao, playing a video game with the squad: What?

Mysti: Can I share something with you from earlier today?

Gao: Wh- what is it, Mysti?

Mysti: Well, I sent you a text early in the morning.

Gao: Mhm.

Mysti: Because I have to go out of town for a weekend this month. And, so I was like- I won't give specific dates, but I was like, do you have any preference whether I go this weekend or the next weekend?

Gao: Yeah?

Mysti: Your response.

Gao: *trying not to crack up*

Mysti: At 9:30 in the morning.

Mysti: "motherfucking Jesse Eisenberg jesus Christ motherfucking Facebook movie jesus can you believe this shit"

Gao: *laughing*

Mysti: No- no- no punctuation. Random capitalization.

Gao: You just made me dieeee...

Mysti: So I respond, "I have no idea what we're talking about right now."

Mysti: 45 minutes pass. I get a text from you.

Mysti: "goddamn created Facebook and fucking lawyers and shit right fucking winklevoss twins goddamn rowing the boat fuck yo shit i cant even fucking believe this shit have you seen this shit fuck I just watched this shit fuck Jesse eisenberg man"

Gao: *wheezing with laughter*

Mysti: I respond "Gao, you're scaring me." An hour passes-

Mysti: You respond, "motherfucking spiderman Spiderman you put in the time fuck put in the time motherfucking built shit with his bare hands fucking best friend shit jesse eisenberg"

Mysti: "im very tired"

Gao: *struggling to breathe*

Mysti: And- and I'm just like, "No- no worries, Gao, I'll- I'll do most of the talking at the hangout today-"

Mysti: IMMEDIATE, like, response, like I'm talking 5 seconds later,

Mysti: "no man ill just talk all day shit man you have to be so interested in the shit I have to say about the Facebook movie fuck dude I just watched it a year and a half ago fuck Jesse Eisenberg man he fucked over Spider-man crazy Winklevoss twins rowing Trent Resin or did the soundtrack fuck this guy who invented Facebook I don't like dying I can't think of who the fuck invented Facebook All I can think is who played the guy who invented Facebook who the fuck invented Facebook"

Mysti: And then, in all capital letters, two hours later,

Gao: *falling over with laughter*

Mysti: "MARK ZUCKERBERG."

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Mysti: Did you hear that!? Boukon just threatened to destroy my lego AT-AT!

Daizyn: ...You just threatened to kill him in his sleep.

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Daizyn: Hey! Wanna hear a joke?

Gao: Sure.

Daizyn: Your life!

Gao: Actually, my life isn’t a joke, jokes have meaning.

Daizyn: Gao, no.

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Daizyn: This is Boukon, he’s … not my assistant, some other word.

Boukon: I’m his carer.

Daizyn: Yeah, my carer. He care’s so I don’t have to.

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Mysti: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much he’s loved. Dae has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for him.

Gao: By forcing them to have fun at a party that they don’t want to be at?

Mysti: I knew you’d understand.

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Mysti: Gao isn’t answering my messages.

Dae: Allow me.

Mysti: I tried 6 times, what makes you thi-

Gao: *replying to message* Hello.

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Dae: Are you trying to give me an aneurysm?

Clover: Pretty sure we all are.

Mysti: I wasn't.

Daizyn: I was.

Gao: I was trying to stop them, for your consideration.

Boukon: I just cause aneurysms naturally.

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Mysti: Okay happy campers! If you were a fruit what would you be and why?

Gao: I'd be a tomato because no one accepts me as part of the group.

Mysti: ...

Gao: ...

Mysti: OKAY HAPPY CAMPERS-

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Gao: *sobbing* why would people kill such cute creatures

Dae: that’s a mosquito, it’s literally a parasite,

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Monster: You stabbed me!

Dae: You kinda deserved it.

Daizyn: No shit?

Boukan: It's nothing personal

Mysti: Nuh uh

Gao: Oh I'm sorry, It was an accident

Clover: Can I get my knife back?

Serial designation BF: Which one were you again?"

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Charlie, going fishing: I’m going LIE to fish!

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Scott: I have a plan.

Jeremy: Good! As long as we aren’t breaking the law again, I’m open to hearing it.

Scott: …

Jeremy: …

Scott: I no longer have a plan.

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Clayton: None of those words are in the Bible!

Johnny: Psalm 119:105. “And Jesus said unto his followers, should a manlet incel attempt to mansplain the blockchain to a girlboss, may she waste his time and yassify his blorbos”

Clayton: HE DID NOT FREAKING SAY THAT!

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Mike: We wouldn’t last two minutes without Scott.

Mike:

Mike: Don’t tell them I said that.

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Scott: Whether or not I pay income taxes is none of the government's business.

Clayton: No, well, actually, it is.

Scott: You don't know my name or what I look like, good luck finding me.