cinnamonwhiskey

[cinnamonwhiskey]

Rio: "He's not yours"

Agatha: "Finders Keepers"

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Agatha: Lilia, I got suspended from school…

Lilia: WHAT?!?! What did you do?

Agatha: My teacher pointed at me with a ruler, and he said “there is an idiot at the end of this ruler”.

Lilia: And…?

Agatha: I asked which end…

Lilia, unable to contain their laughter: Okay, you just made my day.

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Jen: What are you two arguing about this time?

Lilia: They’re always using common phrases incorrectly!

Agatha: Cry me a table, Lilia.

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*The gang is about to do something dangerous*

Rio: Shouldn’t someone give a pep talk?

Agatha: Go ahead.

Rio: Be careful.

Rio: Don’t die.

Alice: *Holds back a laugh*

Agatha: Great. We’re all bloody inspired.

[cinnamonwhiskey]

AGATHA ALL ALONG TWEETS

(part 1)

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AGATHA ALL ALONG TWEETS

(part 2)

[cinnamonwhiskey]

Alice: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

Lilia: I sleep with a knife.

Agatha: Both of you are pathetic.

Lilia: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Agatha: Rio.

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Agatha, grinning: I have a knife!

Lilia: Put it down, Agatha.

Agatha: Make me! *sprints away*

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Rio: You’ve never looked more beautiful

Agatha covered in slimy wet mud after Rio dragged her out: shut up

Rio: I mean look at you, you’ll never get the think clots of mud and weeds out of your hair, it’s gonna be matted for weeks

Agatha: I said shut the hell up

Rio: So you got taken down by a teenager who’s apparently been manipulating all of you by making you think he was powerless and weak, when actually he turns out to be son of the most powerful witches in existence, who could’ve seen that coming?

Agatha: go fuck yourself Rio I’m not in the mood

Rio: Fuck me yourself you coward

Agatha:…no?! I’m in the middle of a crisis here!

Rio: Never stopped us before

Agatha: We’re so fucked up

Rio: So true Mi Amor

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Alice: Truth or dare?

Agatha: Truth.

Alice: How many hours have you slept this week?

Agatha:

Agatha: Dare.

Alice: Go to sleep.

Agatha: I don't like this game.

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agatha: there’s no i in team but there’s one in pizza

jen: so, you’re not gonna share?

agatha: i’m not going to share

also agatha: *throws the whole pizza at rio*

[cinnamonwhiskey]

AGATHA ALL ALONG TWEETS

(part 4) (click on pictures)

ALSO thinking of doing rio x reader & agatha x reader tweets, lemme know if you guys want something like that

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flopping so hard but here's my wife rio and my wife's wife agatha

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Agatha: I want to be a mom-

Rio: I volunteer!

Agatha:….But you can’t-

Rio: We’re witches! We can do whatever we want, which includes getting you pregnant!

Agatha:…you’re not going to let this go are you?

Rio trying to look for a spell book to help: Nope! Now help me look, there’s definitely a spell or potion somewhere that either gets you pregnant or gives me something to get you pregnant

Agatha: You’re so lucky I love you you psycho

Rio ignoring the slight insult: You’re gonna look so hot pregnant, something you and I created growing inside of you, very hot

Agatha: That does sound very exciting and lovely

Rio: We should start practicing

Agatha: Practicing what?

Rio: Practicing for a baby, that’s what other people do

Agatha: But we’re using magic?

Rio: And?

Agatha: You’re right, okay let’s get practicing

Rio: Yes!

[cinnamonwhiskey]

Chat, I regret to inform you that I have added a new hyperfixation…so…

Agatha All Along Incorrect Quotes!

Alice: Hold the fuck up.

Also Alice, crawling into Lilia’s lap: It’s me. I’m the fuck up. Hold me.

Rio: I have an idea!

Jen: No murder.

Rio, sighing petulantly: I no longer have an idea.

Lilia: I have a bad feeling about this…

Agatha: What do you mean?

Alice: Don’t you ever get that little voice in the back of your head that tells you if something is going to get you in trouble?

Agatha: No.

Jen: That actually explains so much.

Lilia: As far back as I can remember, I’ve always had this little voice in my head telling me to “live it up today, because there’s not gonna be a lot of tomorrows”.

Agatha: You do realize there’s medication designed to get rid of those kinds of voices, right?

Teen: A bird flew in through my window and I’m trying to befriend it.

*later*

Agatha: Why don’t you quit bothering me and go talk to your bird friend?

Teen: Matthew and I are not speaking at the moment.

*the coven, huddling together behind a makeshift shelter to shield themselves from repeated gunshots*

Alice, hastily shoving the others behind her so she can return fire: Agatha, do you have any idea who would want to shoot you?!

Agatha, squashed between Jen and Rio: Many people want to shoot me. I take great pride in that!

Jen, glaring at the group as she hands over bail money:

Alice, tapping her shoulder: What about Teen?

Jen, glaring more: I’ve got to bail him out too? Where’s Agatha?

Teen: No one called her. We used Lilia’s phone call to call Alice and Rio’s to call you. Then Rio used my phone call to vote for American Idol.

Rio: :)

Jen: Rio isn’t answering her phone.

Agatha: Here, I’ll try.

Jen: Alice and I have tried six times each, what makes you think that-

Rio, picking up on the first ring: Hey, sweetheart.

Agatha: The ends always justify the means!

Jen: Do you know who said that?

Agatha: Was it Oprah or someone nice and great like that?

Jen: It was Machiavelli. A decidedly non-Oprah like person.

Jen: I bet you didn’t even finish the thing I asked you to get done!

Agatha: For your information, I most certainly did! Got it done last night!

Teen, whispering to Agatha: You didn’t get it done, did you?

Agatha, whispering back: I don’t even know what she’s talking about.

Lilia: I am at a loss for words!

Teen, glancing at the camera like his mom like he’s on The Office: Despite being lost for words, Lilia yelled at us for the next 45 minutes.

Agatha, carrying Señor Scratchy out of the room:

Señor Scratchy: *snuggles under her chin*

Agatha, kissing his head: You are being punished. Please stop being adorable. I love you.

Teen: I got a trampoline tent for summer sleepovers!

Jen, whispering to the other adult witches: …think of all the sex.

Alice: There are two types of people.

Rio: If you wanted to eat someone, you could put a fire under it and slowly roast them :)

Lilia: …three. Three types of people.

Jen, cautiously: I can’t believe I didn’t notice this before, but…Teen, you are a little crazy.

Teen: Aren’t we all a little crazy here, Jen?

Jen: No, I mean you’re aging-ballerina, child-chess-prodigy, professional magician kind of crazy.

Teen: It’s my mom’s fault. You know, we come from a Jewish family, but she used to tell me the reason Santa didn’t come was because my room was too dirty.

Rio: I’ve come looking for trouble. And if I can’t find trouble, I WILL create some.

Alice: Do you trust me?

Lilia, smiling proudly at her: Yes.

Alice, who has been completely panicking: Wait, what? Why?!

Agatha, awkwardly glancing around for help: Er…Alice, I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know what to say to people who are crying. So I’m just gonna hope that the tone of my voice makes you think I do, okay, sweetie?

Alice, sniffling: …thanks, Agatha.

Agatha, patting her on the back with a bit too much enthusiasm: No problem, kid.

Lilia: I told Agatha about it weeks ago!

Teen: She WHAT?

Agatha: What??? Lilia says insane shit all the time, how was I supposed to know this one was true?!

Lilia: Bank accounts are a sham created by the shadow government!

Agatha: SEE?!

BONUS:

Wanda, watching from the afterlife: so…when exactly do kids grow out of that whole emo, rebellious stage?

Lorna, shrugging: I don’t know. Alice is still in it.

[cinnamonwhiskey]

AGATHA ALL ALONG TWEETS

(part 3)

(click on the pictures)