harley / adult / he/him unless she/her would be funnier / sometimes nsfw
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found on FB marketplace. made me laugh out loud
@shiftythrifting
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i listened to my body and it's asking for substances
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i need you slaughtered
every1 isin love with me
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let's all go out and buy pink refreshing citrusy fruity sexually arousing drinks
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Why don’t we let the guy whose every plan could be reasonably construed as an abstract suicide attempt take a crack it
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You've been turned into an animal
Spin the wheel to find out which
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you just made out with me for the last thirty minutes the hell you mean “what do you want”
hey man. uhhh. [gets nervous in a cute and sexy way] you hear about the gougar crisis lately. wild stuff. well anyway see you around [trips on my way out but still in a sexy way because my shorts are really short today]
yeah the ecomony is in fuckign shambles. can’t even buy a single gougar. nice shorts btw. come to my shed in yhe back of my yarg
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hey thanks. im harley btw nice to meet you. are you the front cow or the ass cow
hey man. uhhh. [gets nervous in a cute and sexy way] you hear about the gougar crisis lately. wild stuff. well anyway see you around [trips on my way out but still in a sexy way because my shorts are really short today]
yeah the ecomony is in fuckign shambles. can’t even buy a single gougar. nice shorts btw. come to my shed in yhe back of my yarg
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[consults my wikihow article]
👁️👁️
hey man. uhhh. [gets nervous in a cute and sexy way] you hear about the gougar crisis lately. wild stuff. well anyway see you around [trips on my way out but still in a sexy way because my shorts are really short today]
yeah the ecomony is in fuckign shambles. can’t even buy a single gougar. nice shorts btw. come to my shed in yhe back of my yarg
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i’ve always felt like i’m pretty good at flirting because who wouldn’t want a piece of this yk but maybe i need a refresher. going back to the basics

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TRUE…god dori you always get it. okay i’ll go be sexy
im nervous rn can you guys encourage me to flirt with guy im like rlly nervous about it. maybe it’s cringe
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thank you man you’re the only one who gets me out in this cold cruel world
im nervous rn can you guys encourage me to flirt with guy im like rlly nervous about it. maybe it’s cringe
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can somebody other than stelle stelledore (known fake ass bitch) encourage me
im nervous rn can you guys encourage me to flirt with guy im like rlly nervous about it. maybe it’s cringe
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im nervous rn can you guys encourage me to flirt with guy im like rlly nervous about it. maybe it’s cringe
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