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i am sick to my core, truly, if i let my eyes wander from the one true living water Jesus Christ

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the problem w dreams is what happens if they don't come to pass

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muscles come with heavy gains, and lessons with the sharp fangs of discipline, cutting out the excess

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anxiety is consuming me in manny ways

help me draw near God

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it is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the v0i6

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"Populists who have successfully crafted their images through media, Bukele and Trump are of different generations but display similar tendencies in how they relate to the press, political opposition and justice systems in their respective countries."

https://apnews.com article donald-trump-white-house-el-salvador-kilmar-abrego-garcia-ad338d6b4558a6aba80e8290fd3eece9

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"He embraced his own program of what Rudolf Bultmann called “demythologization.” In his [Reinhold Niebuhr] own words, “If we take the disciplines of the various sciences seriously, as we do, we must depart at one important point from the biblical picture of life and history.” Actually, he departed from quite a few points." As Marsden noted in his fine work, The Twilight of the American Enlightenment, “The grand irony of that strategy was that, while Niebuhr himself used it effectively as a way to preserve a public role for the Christian heritage, its subjective qualities made the faith wholly optional and dispensable.” He also knew a story when he saw one, and in the midst of the Cold War, both Whittaker Chambers and TIME founder and publisher Henry Luce believed that a recovery of theism was a necessary defense against Communism. The cover stories on Lewis and Niebuhr were part of their effort to draw attention to the continuing relevance of Christianity in the battle against Communism. The Christian intellectual influence we should seek is the influence of an intellect saturated in Christian truth, keenly applied to the questions of our times. Whether the secular world will listen to us, much less thank us for the effort, is another question altogether.

albert mohler -- what became of the christian intellectual

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grandma just died. i haven't felt so silent

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you don’t want to know how you fit in other peoples’ narratives and lives, because in this day and age, you might just not

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arrópese hasta donde le llegue la sábana

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erratic

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big fish in small tank or small fish in big tank. the excitement alone might drive me to a suicide mission on the big tank

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“Religious discourse operates in a different way: its “truth” is established through complex rhetorical ways which generate the experience of inhabiting a meaningful world controlled by a benevolent higher power…

Psychoanalysis provides it: while fully accepting the importance of factual truth - or, in this case, not a physical fact but the interpretation that explains the patient’s symptoms - a psychoanalyst has to tell this to the patient at the right moment, when (based upon his analytic experience) he is convinced that his statement will deeply affect the patient’s subjectivity, pushing him towards accepting some repressed truths about his subjectivity and desires. If the psychoanalyst tells this to his patient too early, the patient will dismiss it as irrelevant. For the truth to have an effect on those to whom it is told, it matters when it is told to them – and, obviously, the same goes for political statements, especially with regard to the ongoing Gaza war.”

from zizek “TIME TO TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT GAZA” substack

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why oh why must these things be so diametrically opposed!?

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is it better to be a fool and a dreamer, to find comfort in a pillow, and to renounce the real til death. or is better to murder soul and peace for gain and preservation in a soulless land. ?

is embarassment worse than contempt, is shame worse than relational death. ?

there's always pull(ey)s , there's always eyes to see, there's always bread with water. void look me over and lay with me to ponder, keep me from running

is there any left when emotion's gone; save me from the eternal abyss that is seeking some comfort.

but lead me to the water of truth,; my soul stays divided in two

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finding solace and hope in the fact that i’m at least needed, at the very least by the other gender

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the long game

playing the long game looks like doing nothing for years on end.

but i have to realize i'm playing the long game.

don't trash the hope as useless when it's brought so many flowers to you without fail my soul.

lean in and force yourself to give more until you run dry. the regret will appear if you cut it loose too early before giving it a shot