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“All You Need is Love”

Spoken through the heart of a young lovestruck writer during the peak of the Bohemian revolution, “love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love” (Elephant Love Medley). His love interest, however, refutes this statement as she insists that “love is just a game” (Elephant Love Medley). Everyone has a different idea of what love is, and love plays a unique role in all of our lives. The ambiguous definition of love has driven Bell Hooks, the author of “All About Love: New Visions”, to determine why some of us lack love in our lives. Throughout the book, Hooks courageously shares her internal struggles to find love and promotes her research in efforts to conclude the cause of “lovelessness”. Hooks’s intention for the book was to allow leaders to learn what they need to do in order to love again, as Hook shares “what we must do to be touched by love’s grace” (All About Love: New Visions xxix). 

Hooks associates the inconsistent definition of love with one’s inability to love and be loved. Hooks explains that “if society had a commonly held understanding of the meaning of love, the act of loving would not be so mystifying” (3). However, having an explicit definition of love would be to miss out on the core of its being. Love is a beautiful thing that everyone experiences differently, and at times, cannot even describe. If there were a strict, conventional definition of love, it would have a negative impact on society as it limits one’s belief in love, promotes a competitive environment, and obliterates individuality.

Primarily, love is a feeling that may be difficult to define at times. To define “love” would be to associate a particular meaning to the word. However, even words with distinct definitions can be interpreted in many different ways, as words are only words. Love exists and is interpreted in various ways whether we explicitly define it or not. Hooks contradictorily explains that “before language is know, the identify of caretakers is recognized, babies respond to affectionate care” (5). Thus, if babies are able to recognize love and give love in return before even knowing any language for that matter, it proves that the notion of love exists whether explicitly defined or not. 

Furthermore, to construct a conventional definition of love would be to restrict the various forms of love and further isolate those who do not obtain love. Love is a unique feeling that is not expressed and interpreted in the same way. Thus, if love were more strictly defined, less people would be considered to have love present in their lives, which would create a negative outlook on love. For example, if a parent, despite his or her best efforts, does not equitably express love to his or her child according to the conventional definition, does that mean that the parent does not love their child? They child may perceive the love they receive as unjust, because there is an expectation of love that they can compare it to. Defining love would have similar effects as having too high of a standard when dating: if one is expecting an individual to possess too many particular qualities, they are never going to find that person and will remain dissatisfied and alone.  

As equally evident, to define love would be to terminate individuality. Defining love would reinforce the idea that love is the same for everyone. But one of the best things about love is how ambiguous it is. Love can be expressed and received in a variety of ways and promotes individuality. People long to be special and different and that is why the wide-ranged definition of love is so desirable. No one wants the same love that everyone else has. 

Hooks needed to define love so that she could define what it was that she was yearning for. But this does not apply to everyone. Individuals should be able to define love in their own way and should not be influenced by the generalized idea of what love should be. Defining love would just be another way in which the dominant ideology controls the lives of unique individuals.

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The Unjust Influence of the Male Gaze

Desire could very well be the greatest distraction from reality there will ever be. Desire controls individuals on the conscious and subconscious level. Desire can be the catalyst in falling in love, and yet it can also be the genesis of hate and the tendency to control others. In Lauren Berlant’s text, “Desire”, Berlant provides much needed clarity regarding the ambiguous definition of “desire”, and enlightens readers by expressing the prominent effects that desire has on individuals and society as a whole. 

Primarily, Berlant explains that psychoanalysts do not agree on the precise meaning of “desire” (Berlant). Berlant concludes that “desire” is associated with romantic concepts as well as Freudian categories that refer to sexual energy (Berlant). The distinguished opposition is rooted in the conflicting conception of what it is that drives one’s desires. The first theory states the primary and secondary objects in one’s life determine one’s desire. The opposing theory, presents a Lacanian model, explaining that desire is rooted in a drive “that moves beyond its objects, always operating with them and in excess to them” (19). 

Regardless of the contrasting views of what it is that drives desire, Berlant explains that study of the drive of desire had only started to be studied in the 1960s because of desire’s profound influence in the “anti-institutional political struggles” (45). In particular, men have been driven by their sexual desires to control women “in the forms of visual pleasure” (46). For centuries men have greatly influenced one of the largest industries in the world: the fashion industry. Men have controlled what women can and cannot wear, and even design women’s clothing. In the movie, “Vertigo” Midge Wood explains to her unenlightened love interest, John Ferguson, that even the intimate design of the bra was created by a man. The purpose of the bra is to elevate and support the breasts and thus, a man constructed this design to fulfill  his desire of what he believes breasts should look like. Now bras have become so institutionalized and it is considered inappropriate for women to not wear a bra. It is absurd to think that women are basically forced to wear this uncomfortable garment to fit in with society, all because a man’s gross egocentric desires. 

But the influence of male desire goes far beyond controlling what women wear. The male desire has immersed society to become more sexist. Men have the tendency to see women as sexual objects and thus when women wear “revealing” or “sexy” clothes, women are considered to be “asking for it”. Women are not able to dress freely because of the way men interpret their clothing. Even back in elementary school, girls were not allowed to wear strapless shirts, or thinly-strapped tank tops. Meanwhile, boys were more than welcome to wear muscle t-shirts and could roam shirtless in gym class. The obnoxious grounds that forced girls to dress in a particular manner was because boys could not control themselves and their desires. This notion is very degrading towards women, but unfortunately it is still very evident in the world today. There was a story published recently in the newspaper that explained that a police officer professed that a young lady who was raped deserved to be raped because of what she was wearing. But how could one’s clothing constitute the grounds of rape? One should be able to wear whatever they want and be seen as a person rather than a sexual object. The tendency for males to sexualize everything through their innermost desires that is the prevailing cause of the sexism and the sexualization of women. Only through the strength of the unity of women all across the world can we put a stop to this seemingly never ending battle for equality.

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The Detrimental Effect of Defining the Origins of Sexual Identity

The ongoing debate between essentialists and constructivists regarding the origins of sexual preference and identity has no means to end. In the introduction of “Epistemology of the Closet”, Eve Sedgewick addresses the ongoing issues and attempts to pry these believers from “their historical backing to attach to them newly enabling meanings” (41). The attainment in changing one’s perception of their conceptual landscape is unlikely and prone to misfire, thus, Sedgewick aims to “minimize [the] reliance on any particular account of the origin of sexual preference and identity in individuals” (41) through the notion of gay-affirmative work. 

Sedgewick explains the detrimental effects that both the essentialists and constructivists theories have on individuals. The essentialist point of view states that culture greatly influences an individual’s sexual identity, and views sexual identity as “malleable relative to nature” (41) and thus, can be influenced. Sedgewick argues that this destructive view on sexual identity implies that humanity has “a right or even an obligation to intervene” (41), despite the modern idea of being free to be oneself. Contrarily, the constructivist view describes the origins of sexual identity as biological, suggesting that individuals are born a certain way. Again, Sedgewick disputes this analysis, stating that it is problematical to ground one’s sexual identity in biology as it “is a stable way of insulating it from societal interference” (43). The disregard to societal factors neglects the idea that one’s sexual identity can change over time and forces individuals to conform to a particular identity. 

Neither of the theories do justice in providing an analysis of the origins of sexual identity, as both views ignore the concept in which everyone is different and that not everyone’s origins of sexual identity are going to be the same. By enforcing such strongly opinionated and invariable notion of the origins of sexual identity, this marginalizes queer individuals and refutes the meaning of the term “queer”.

Primarily, conducting the study of the origins one’s sexual identity to essentially determine the root cause of being “gay” exerts a negative connotation to queer individuals. Whether the origins be naturalistic or culturistic, both perceptions marginalize queer individuals, casting them as outside of the norm. Providing an explanation as to why individuals are queer implies that there is something wrong with being queer in the first place. This is harmful to the queer community, making them seem less welcomed in society than they already are. 

Both the essentialist and constructivist theories imply that the sexual identities of queer individuals come from the same origins. The term “queer” was created to allow individuals to express themselves in a way that does not conform to a partcular view or identity. Thus, providing such a broad analysis on the origins of sexual identity conforms all queer individuals to the same sexual identity, contradicting the meaning and reassurance of the term “queer”. 

Sedgewick concludes that in the unstable balance of assumptions between the two theories, “there is no unthreatened, unthreateneding conceptual home for a concept of gay origins (43). However, the desire and efforts to define the origins of sexual identity in the first place is the true root cause behind the neglect and discrimination towards queer individuals.

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Beyond What the Eye Can See

The book Fun Home, written by Alison Bechdel, is no ordinary memoir. Alison writes about her life through the form of a “tragicomic”, revealing details of her life through narration, dialogue, and vivid imagery. This visual form of writing allows Alison to provide the audience with a more visual and clarified representation of her life. Every person has their own form of reality and perceive things differently. Thus, people are often unable see beyond what their eyes display. Consequently, the world has this mentality that disabilities are only physical, and hence must be visible to others. Throughout her memoir, Bechdel shares the struggles she undergoes are she experiences life with a disability. Bechdel demonstrates through text as well as visual aid, that disabilities can be internal and still greatly impact an individual. 

Disability by definition is a physical or mental condition that limits a person’s abilities (Merriam-Webster). Though this is the scientifically accurate definition of disability, the world has formed a unanimous stigma around disability, associating it only with its physical attributes. The research paper, “Provocations for Critical Disability Studies” further accentuates the notion of the disregard of mental disabilities, stating that one is likely to encounter disability in poststructuralist criticism. This research implies that people reject the scientific and positivist aspirations behind the meaning of disability. This is detrimental to those who suffer from non-physical disabilities in its various forms and thus do not receive the help and support they require. 

Alison struggled to cope with her Obsessive Compulsion Disorder (OCD), as she received little to no acknowledgement nor support from her family members. Alison did not display the physical signs of distress, and therefore from an outsider’s perspective Alison seemed like a perfectly healthy, functionable child. What could not be seen was the internal pain that this disability forced onto Alison. Alison’s mother expressed concern about Alison’s behaviour once, but even then only asked if Alison was ating this way because she felt guilty about something. Rather than truly acknowledging the disability Alison was faced with, her mother associated the erratic behaviours to Alison’s own doing, which considerably contributed to Alison’s challenging childhood.

It was devastatingly hard to read that in Alison’s memoir she was neglected for having this pressing disorder. After reading the memoir, I realized that I had faced a similar experience in my own childhood. Growing up I had always thought that I had a focusing disability, however my parents did not see what I was feeling on the inside. My parents therefore claimed that I was being dramatic and was perfectly fine. Finally at 19 years old, I got tested for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and passed with flying colours. I am not blaming my parents for neglecting to acknowledge that I obtained this disability. My childhood was great and I did very well in school despite the inability to focus at times. I just wish they could have seen in me what I saw in myself. 

This goes to show that even people you surround yourself with, whether it be family, friends, or partners, no one can truly see beyond what their eyes show them. And it is because of this that we have to accept people and not make any assumptions about them as we will never really know what physical, mental, emotional struggles or disabilities they are dealing with.

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Racism; Served on a Silver Platter

Racism has been a part of our society for hundreds of years. You would think by now that there would be no discrimination in the world, yet here we are. That is not to say the world has not progressed in its journey towards equality, it has; but not the extent in which humanity deserves. And why settle for that? The Hate U Give, written by Angie Thomas, helps promote racial injustice as it shines light on major societal issues that the world faces today. It is greatly emphasized through the main character, Starr, as she is faced with police brutality, discrimination, and conflict within herself. 

Primarily, police brutality is a very prominent issue in society today. Police officers are part of an institution that shapes our perceptions as we grow up, and should essentially provide people with reassurance and justice. However, police officers are often found to abuse their power. This is greatly emphasized in the novel, as Starr witness her childhood friend, Khalil, be shot and murdered by a police officer for no reason. Even after trial, the officer was not found guilty. So a man, who is supposed to create peace and protect the law, is able to freely shoot and kill a child because he thought this child was dangerous? This novel may be non-fiction, but this type of story has been told too many times. As a white female in Canada, I have only ever seen police officers as trustworthy, reliable, and even brave. Therefore, it is hard to understand how police officers or rather humans for that matter, could act in such an inhumane matter. Thus, after reading The Hate U Give, it has become very evident that not all law enforcement institutions are fair and that this is a huge issue in our society. We need acknowledge this and speak up about it. 

Another theme that is presented in the novel is the role media plays in shaping our perceptions. The Hate U Give greatly emphasizes how media can control our perceptions of things, especially when Khalil’s death went public. The media played a large role in determining the tone of the situation. Khalil was a kind, loving child who had no weapons on him, and there was no reason for the officer to shoot him. In contrast, the media portrayed Khalil as a black ‘drug dealer’ and ‘possible gang member’. Though these accusations were not true and very irrelevant to the situation, people still believed that Khalil deserved to die because of them. Since the media emphasized Khalil as being ‘black’, this creates a negative connotation of black people, characterizing them as drug dealers and gang members living in the ghetto. Regardless of Khalil's pass-times, the officer did not have any reason to shoot him, and yet the media is making the world believe that the officer is the victim. Starr even says during an interview that, “‘I didn’t know a dead person could be charged in his own murder’” (288). Media greatly determines how we perceive and judge things, as media is the primary transmitter of cultural common sense. Thus, when media depicts black people and portrays them in negative, stereotypical ways, people associate black people to these negative characteristics. Media can therefore be very problematic and can essentially create and promote racism. That being said, media can also be very powerful, and if used in the right way, can create peace and equality. 

Finally, despite all the negative endeavours Starr undergoes, one of the largest conflicts she is faced with is with her inner-self. Starr lives in two worlds, greatly different from one another. Starr uses code switching throughout her life as she behaves in a certain manner when in Williamson and in a very different manner in Garden Heights. The extent to which Starr has to filter what she says and hide parts of her life just to blend in with the two different worlds is very unfair, and essentially exhausting for Starr. People should be able to be themselves and still trust that those around them will understand them for it. There is definitely a lack of compassion and empathy for others if people are being judged, hurt, or even arrested for acting differently than the ‘norm’. We live in a discriminatory environment where diversity and differentiation of cultures is shadowed by the idealized way of living, that has been set by dominant cultures and/or race. 

This novel has been very eye-opening as Starr shines light on prominent issues that I otherwise might have overlooked. I have been very fortunate to live in a safe community; I am comfortable being myself; and I never felt targeted nor discriminated. However, I do not appreciate these privileges as much as I should, because they are all I have ever known. Ever since birth privileges have been served to me on a silver platter. I did not ask for these privileges but people did not ask for racism either. In The Hate U Give, Starr provides an engaging narrative that allowed me to really see the effects of the challenges African Americans still face today. It is because of this that I will appreciate and look for the good in my life, be more empathetic towards others, and fight for the equality that every human deserves. 

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A Letter to the World

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A Letter to the World

It is hard to believe that in 2019 there is still inequality between gender, race, social classes, and many other characteristics in which the world discriminates. It is a very apparent issue that has touched the lives of many. But how could such a persistent global issue still be greatly present in today’s society? In the text “A Letter to My Nephew”, James Balwin provides a heartbreakingly true message, emphasized greatly through his delivery. 

Baldwin wrote this letter to his nephew and thus the dialogue within the text makes the reading so much more emotional. I have read historical pieces about racism and inequality many times before, however, I have never felt this much empathy towards those who suffer from it. It is so much more effective to read it through a person’s perspective since it shows that it is a real man writing to his real nephew about real circumstances that he had faced, all because of his skin colour. Hearing what a real man has to say about the very real issues the world is facing is definitely more effective than reading it in any other form. 

Baldwin greatly emphasizes the dominance of white people by saying that, “the black man has functioned in the white man's world as a fixed star” (3). This is very evident in society today. Thinking back to a when I was a child and would colour things at school, I would use the pencil crayon called “skin colour”. This name implied that everyone has this beige colour of skin, which is beyond incorrect and emphasizes the idea that white people are the dominant race. Just a couple weeks ago there was an article published that explained how Donald Trump called Gregory Cheadle “my African American”. After that was said, the article further discussed that Cheadle is leaving the Republican party due to the white superiority complex. Even in 2019 the president of the United States of America is promoting this idea of white superiority. Not only does Trump refer to him as “African American” (which should be irrelevant) but he also creates this illusion of ownership of him as he uses the term “my”. There are many other stories that also emphasize Baldwin’s idea of a black man living in a white man’s world, as this is still a very prominent issue in the world today. 

Throughout the letter, Baldwin discusses many of the circumstances black people have been faced with. To overcome these issues Baldwin explains that, “you must accept [white people] and accept them with love, for these innocent people have no other hope. They are in effect still trapped in a history which they do not understand and until they understand it, they cannot be released from it. They have had to believe for many years, and for innumerable reasons, that black men are inferior to white men” (3). It is astonishing to see that after all Baldwin has been through, he does not feel hatred towards white people, but rather love and sorrow. This passage particularly stood out to me because I see it within my own family. My grandparents were born in the 1940s and to this day make racist comments periodically. They are not hateful or racist individuals, they are just stuck in the ways in which society told them to follow. In contrast, imagine if someone were born right now. This person would not be able to tell any difference between white and black people besides the different tones of skin, that is, until society tells it those differences. And that is exactly why Baldwin explains that though it may be hard, everyone must wait patiently for the world to realize its ugly past, learn from its mistakes, and create a brave new world where the colour of your skin does not matter.