clarisselaruee - Tumblr blog

[clarisselaruee]

thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

[clarisselaruee]

youre an olympic level hater. i respect it.

they asked me to represent my country in the sport of hating i said no. i hate my country

[clarisselaruee]

muppet profiles

the muppets trading cards (1992), pt. 3

[clarisselaruee]

made the orb part of @wizardsisananimal 's wizard maze <|:.)

[clarisselaruee]

at my sketchbook. straight up “drawing it”. and by “it”, haha, well. let’s justr say. Nothing

[clarisselaruee]

not now mom i’m wasting my life on a website the entire internet believes to be dead

[clarisselaruee]

ill keep writing about surviving because i don't know what else there is

[clarisselaruee]

real life: sorry im just not a social media kind of guy… i wanna live in the moment y’know…. im like really private i like having secrets

on tumblr at 11:41 pm : guess whose period just started while watching fraggle rock season 1 episode 17

[clarisselaruee]

THEY KEEP ASKING ME IF I WOULD DIE FOR THEM AND I KEEP ASKING WHY THEY WANT ME DEAD

[clarisselaruee]

[clarisselaruee]

narratively I am a fan of romances that don’t ever actually become romances

I don’t mean in an aromantic life partner way, I mean romantic tension that is never resolved or acted upon for whatever reason but by the end it’s clear that both characters experienced the love of their lives without ever acknowledging it as such. but they know. they know.

[clarisselaruee]

i love you people i love this site i wish slutweed was real

[clarisselaruee]

Fuck it we bawl (starts sobbing uncontrollably)

[clarisselaruee]

Chinook Salmon (Oncorhynchus tshawytscha)

[clarisselaruee]

Wizard and her paramour

[clarisselaruee]

i have been constantly in tears over this newly hatched duck i found on instagram last night

[clarisselaruee]

fixed it‼️