closetcasefabray - Tumblr blog

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s01 e07 vs s01 e08

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Lee Moldaver x Rose MacLean is living real long-term and rent-free in my head for something that only hit me in the last 5 minutes of an 8-hour TV show

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hi i’d like to be financially dominated bc i need a laptop that doesn’t die randomly to write these bc i hate writing on my phone. here’s all the avatrice fic ideas i’ve practically laid out & written at @snowandwolves:

- and they were neighbors - this came from the idea of beatrice stress baking & she runs out of sugar, so she asks her neighbor… (prob set in NY bc idk how to NOT write about this city & its weirdness) — starts v cute. gets kinda devastating sorry in advance.

- the 100 au - somehow emotionally more aching but no one (important) dies - ava’s born with a disability & out of wedlock, which means she’s treated as a burden on the ark. her mom was floated when ava was a child. dr. salvius would adopt her if she didn’t have her son michael. but she treats her with ancient technology. beatrice has only known obligation to her people on the ground. loss is to be expected as commander. love is weakness. then, yknow, a girl with a halo falls from the stars & what other choice does beatrice have but to fall too?

- fallout 4 au - beatrice wakes up 200 years of cryo sleep when the bombs dropped. her parents who afforded the vault died. her secret romance with lucia makes her long for closure. she makes her way to diamond city looking for answers and meets a nosy reporter who enjoys causing problems for diamond city’s mayor. ava and her “brother” diego are doing their best to find the truth in the hellscape that is 2224. (also just imagine bea in power armor—“my knight in semi-rusted armor!” — ava prob)

- college au - i’ve written bits on here before (also set in NY bc idk what college town culture is like) - beatrice has everything planned out. ava is winging everything bc she was never supposed to get this far. (there’s a sequel to it that i’m plotting too & i’m sorry…)

- now & then au - it’s the 90s. basically i watched the scene where roberta plays baseball with boys. “girls can’t play ball. why don’t you go home and play with your dolls??” (“the only dolls ava has are GI Joes…” — camila) [ava punches him] beatrice pulls her off of him. “psycho bitch. too bad your mom’s dead and can’t teach you to act like a lady” [cue beatrice pushing ava back so she can kick his ass—gets a fat lip & black eye but NO ONE says that shit to ava.]

- airbnb au - (let’s pretend this isn’t messing up the housing market 😭 ) bea is financially independent of her parents & needs cash so she’s a superhost. where bea lives is quiet & peaceful. ava fucks that up. in an ava silva perfect kinda way. ava visits once a year over several years. they start falling in love but ava never stays.

less hashed out ideas:

- smallville/superman/supergirl au

- avatar/lok au

- this is how you lose the time war au (bc that book is my roman empire—all versions & threads of it)

if these exist already my b but i promise promise it’s coincidental—haven’t been reading much fics lately (other than seabiscuit’s western au).

anyway… back to work.

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idk maybe i’ve been honing some WWASD? (What Would Ava Silva Do?) energy but i decided i’m going to greece to visit a friend… in the same month i’m going on my other trip.

i decided this year would be the year to start taking back my time & doing a lot of the things i didn’t get to do when dealing with health shit in my 20s. not getting any younger.

anyone have recommendations for greece?

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i love the city but desperately need a getaway this year, so i’m planning a solo trip out of state & my supervisor is from the area i’m planning to visit, & y’all…

i’m now planning my trip around seeing puffins (& maybe whales) & lighthouses 🥹

is this partially inspired by lighthouse au & small town australia au? yes.

@snowandwolves i stg i will be calling you crying the whole damn time “[sobbing] they’re so cute & they really do sound like weird farts 😭 listen [distant fart sounds]” i’ll probably be far from them bc the tour doesn’t get SUPER close, but that’s fine!

not expecting to meet my own beatrice (wouldn’t say no), but i’m just p confident seeing tall trees & clear night skies with actual stars & lighthouses at sunset on the ocean & PUFFINS will cure me of all mental illness (jk but i’ll def feel better).

currently making a list of things i want to do in order of importance & trying to figure out the best time to go (with consideration of the crowds in the summer months). once i decide i’m going to plan so many things!

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no rizz. just insane music taste & a peculiar amount of knowledge about very niche topics and historic events

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EDIT: CHECK MY LATEST ADDITION BEFORE YOU START SHIT IN THE NOTES, THANKS.

warning for discord users

If you're on the app, immediately go to your dms and then "add friends". After the latest update they allow your contacts to find you and have that option turned on by default, so make sure it's unchecked!

This is very obviously not great for a multitude of reasons, but especially for people in vulnerable positions who do not want people in their contacts to see who they are on discord and/or know they have discord in the first place. I've also tried finding out if this is a thing on desktop but haven't been able to find any mention of it, so either it's not a "feature" (yet) or they've hidden it. Either way, stay safe, and turn off finding friends via contacts!

[ID: three screenshots from the discord app with circles around the buttons to press to get to this "feature". 1: the messages/DM button, 2: the "add friends button", 3: in the add friends page, the "allow contacts to add me" checkbox. /END ID]

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you’re sitting across from me in a shitty diner in anywhere, america, and i watch you pour too much creamer in your coffee and i think “i love you.” you look up, catching me staring, and for a moment i think i’m brave enough to say it, but i take too long and the moment passes. i take the balled up straw wraper and flick it at you, pretending that was my plan all along. you laugh. i never want to go another day without hearing that laugh. i think i will have all the time in the world to say it.

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VICTORIA PEDRETTI via alexandraafrench on Instagram (December 2, 2023)

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I guess what I think is that suicide is a symptom of a problem and not the problem to fix, you know what I mean? To stop suicides you have to stop people’s mental health from getting to the point where they consider it, you have to treat the disease, trying to treat the symptom itself is almost completely useless.

For instance, Japan has spent a great deal of money on anti-suicide infrastructure, doing genuinely cartoonishly things like putting rollers on bridge railings so you can’t climb over them and slide right off, putting blue lights in the subway so it’s harder to see to throw yourself in front of a train. It’s not working. Japan’s suicide rate rose again in 2022. They are not addressing the root causes and stressors in their citizen’s lives and social barriers to mental health care and psychiatric medication.

It’s the same with universities in America, many have spent an exorbitant amount of money on turning their dorms into psych ward like environments. Anti-hanging chairs that you can’t stand on, bunks you can’t hang yourself from, slanted doorknobs etc. And yet suicide is still the second leading cause of death for college students. They make no attempts to make college easier, to make pausing and resuming your studies better, to make the pressure of an academic environment feel less life or death. They make no accommodations for the individual. They just make it a little harder to hang yourself in a few rooms on campus and call it a day, say they’re being proactive in terms of mental health.

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THE HAUNTING OF BLY MANOR (2020)

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You're the one who burned three hundred of my warriors alive.

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I DONT HAVE NOTIFICATIONS ON FOR TUMBLR BC MOST OF THEM ARE S3X BOTS FOLLOWING ME 🤣 BUT YES PLS MAKE SNOWY COMPANION PIECE.

but we’ve talked about this—you get in my head enough that i can literally tell you all about snow with silly anecdotes to brainstorm. i already told you about all the snow 🍆 at my campus as soon as it snowed more than 6 inches lol

have i told you about the waves that freeze in the great lakes? like it gets so cold so fast it the waves freeze??!!!??? i want to see them even though i’ll complain about the cold the whole time. so basically my need to cry & be in awe of nature & the seasons will always make me think of this fic.

i also always imagined ava being ass at ice skating & bea having not really done much of it being a natural (bc balance or whatever). last winter i told @sunsafewriting about the little penguins they provide (typically children) to push & hold onto as they learn to skate at one of the rinks in NY & diego would get one for ava (“because your clumsiness is concerning, ava”).

diego would throw a snowball at ava & a snowball fight would ensue & ava would accidentally duck into a snowball & it hits her in the face & she gets a black eye & diego feels soooo bad he takes care of her but ava’s just ☺️ bc bea also takes care of her & “c’mon i look pretty badass, bea.” & “ava, i know how you got the black eye which is decidedly not badass.” & (from the other room where he’s cooking dinner) “i’m sorry 😭” & “ok not badass. but i’m still cute right? 🥺” & “yes, darling. you’re as cute as ever.”

don’t even get my started on the holidays. or bea with rosy cheeks & nose & her freckles 😭. omg the northern lights together??? jillian gets them one of those igloos with clear views of the sky for an anniversary present. (listen—i wish so bad to have a mind-blowing ****** under aurora borealis but if i can’t then my fav ship should).

YOU STARTED THIS.

(enjoy your potato day but i’ll prob send you 487558 additional messages about this now.)

ps: i love your cat. truly. but i stg S, please spend my kofi on yourself.

pps: actually, i demand it.

ppps: [affectionately]

so rain now makes me think of your lighthouse au but now it's snowing and i'm wondering does it snow at the lighthouse they're at? just picturing bea with snowboots and snow all around at a lighthouse at the edge of the world

this reminds me of a conversation i had with @closetcasefabray where i asked her what season we're in now at the lighthouse au cos i genuinely don't know LMAO though when i started this, i had the spring months plus a few weeks of summer in mind 💀 so, we're not gonna get into snow in this fic bUT NOW YOU'VE PUT IDEAS IN MY HEAD bec what if they're bundled up and ava is being silly and bea falls on her ass despite her snowboots and she's embarrassed about jt until ava laughs and she joins in until it's hard to breathe? oh god, what if they make a snowman and they argue about what the nose should be? OR what if they're standing at the top of the lighthouse, snow all around like you said, nothing but white beyond them, together before the world begins again? WHAT THEN

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for @maladyofthequotidian and her gorgeous fic