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#1 ROOMMATE WANTED!

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further documentation by linnea long and chanel

documentation by @chanel_9_news and @linnealongl on INSTAGRAM, two great artists who deserve ur attention!!

THANK YOU

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thomas hirschhorn moment

this one is cool! like making a painting out of canvases or something. i really like this,

this one is sick too. really simple and beautiful. reminds me of "godspeed you black emperor"

i love how these ones appear to be pages from a journal, very site-specific and interactive and sculptural

a list of beliefs -- very cool! i really like "energy = yes, quality = no!"

a mysterious and colourful and characterful political or philosophical diagram

beautiful website

i think this guy is cool, but i really resent being compared to him just because of my use of materials and design or whatever

these are beautiful images though

i love how ambitious and complete and entire and world-like these artworks are becoming -- i do REALLY fuck with these ones. it's cool that me and thomas hirschhorn are going a similar direction, but without knowledge of one another

i'm really fucking anxious rn so i gotta go

[coffee---bean]

some photos of people in the work by LILY TUCKER-TSUREKO

sorry to (classmate) who is in nearly all of these-,

this is all photos from the inside of the thing

yesterday, we showed it off, and crawled inside, and it was really fun! i added a light on the front, and a tunnel at the front to make getting it more mysterious and etc. i'll try find or take some more photos.

i think people liked it!

the feedback was, once again, look at thomas hirschon.

i'll do that right now

DOCUMENTATION BY TUCKER, @septeverest

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thinking out-loud for a while

hi, i thought i'd write down my thoughts for a bit about the manifesto work, and just see what comes out.

i'm not very inspired right now. donald trump just became the president of the united states of america, again. i'm also completely foodless and going through a weird medical thing as i prepare for a colonoscopy.

i'm listening to some MOUNT EERIE, since the newest album "NIGHT PALACE" just came out. his vibe as a musician is so beautiful and soft and detailed and organic and mysterious, sprawling -- truly the only person who was inspired by TWIN PEAKS to actually carry that inspiration and make something amazing and better

i think his work is inspiring me a little.

i'd like to build a bit more onto the thing -- give it a tunnel entrance area, give it a droopy thing. cut into it, decorate, add more sprawl around the bottom.

and then i'd like to make some music inside it, and record it, and project it out. so i think that's maybe two sessions -- one to do a bunch of building, and one to do some music.

i only have about a week left, and i need to have a colonoscopy in that time, unfortunately. oh well! tomorrow i'll be unable to work, but on friday i could come in before my pizza job. and maybe on sunday, and maybe on monday, and maybe on tuesday for a little while.

and who knows, maybe i can keep it for a long time? we'll see.

i hope so.

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i'd also like to just write for a little while. how am i feeling? what do i have to say? i feel like recently i have very little to say, i just want to do things. i don't know if i have a purpose. i think part of being an artist is being able to give yourself over to some kind of bigger thing, imaginary or no. you need a muse, i guess. and my muse in the past has been a shallow understanding of buddhist philosophy and wisdom, or romantic heartbreak and loneliness, or anger and anti-authoritarian rage at my school or my parents or anything.

but recently i've been kind of fine, and i've been dating someone, and i've been a lot less insecure and a lot more humble, i think. i'm becoming more aware of how little i know, and how little i have to offer, when considered in the enormity of every other person, and making a masterpiece seems strange to me, totally self-indulgent for a bottomless purposeless life.

what do i want to do?

i think at the moment, honestly, i'm a little annoyed that i have to make art in general, and have it be experienced in a way i don't appreciate. i like things that take a long time, and shift, and change, and feel old, and feel like they have history, and layers of meaning warmly baked into them. and i like to explore, i like to communicate and run, i like to have enemies and i like to have friends. i like learning and i like feeling close to people. i think life is endless nothingness and movement. i feel like movement is all it is, really. i think everything is kind of just atoms and forces and we're carrying those atoms from one place to another, as we are carried.

the album NIGHT PALACE ends with a statement i find very frightening,

It's that nothing arises in the first place All this impermanence is just another thing my mind made I was never here, and nothing goes away

and i think that idea has contributed to, and given context to, how i feel at the moment. i feel very... i feel kind of just like i exist, i guess. i'd like to one day get to the point where i just exist as flowing matter. i feel like a flickering candle, maybe, and i'd like to go out. i'd like to stop for a while, i guess.

not in a suicide way, just... i don't know. i'm tired of moving. i'm done with this, i think. i've lifted enough heavy things, mentally, i mean. i want to lift heavy things physically. i want to build this thing, i love it, it's so fun. i love building and creating and it feels like silly sandcastles.

i think sandcastles are amazing things. they're so beautiful, they rise and fall, and wet sand as a material is so sludgy and inconvenient - you never really make what you want. and since it's a child's medium and very much not taken seriously in the art-world, there aren't really tools for moulding it. it's a battle, and it's meaningless. and that's really beautiful.

i think manifesto is a good name.

but, like,,, what the fuck does that mean i do,,,

like i feel like that perspective means i can do anything.

ok! what should i do?

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mostly done!

hey,

yesterday i spent a few hours and mostly finished the cardboard construction. i still have two weeks, so we'll see what happens!

i'll talk about three things

the process of making

what i want to do next

why i'm doing this

1. the process of making

lots of standing on chairs, hanging off the staircase, holding onto something with one hand, using my thighs to lock myself onto something, etc. sweaty work!!!!!

cardboard pulled out of bins. zipties bought at newtown mitre 10.

2. what i want to do next

i want to keep building upwards, either getting thinner and thinner, or getting thicker again, or just staying in a little cylinder.

i want to maybe integrate more lights, or carve little windows into it.

i want to put a little sign up that says "go ahead inside!"

i want to keep on sprawling and spreading.

i want to stick flowers in it, i want to do the street-light idea.

3. why am i doing this

i've been thinking about this, since stuart asked me again about my conceptual practice - in a kind of tone that implies he's worried about me or something. like he really needs me to throw him a bone in terms of why i'm doing this.

so i thought about it, and i had a lot of people came past and ask me why i'm doing it. it's really big and it's in public, so i did get a lot of people asking me stuff. a theatre professor person really liked it and was glad i was using the space. they described it as "intriguing", i think?

some people compared it to a house, or a fireplace, or a tower. i think when asked about what it is, the best i could do was say:

"have you played dark souls?"

("no")

"it's kind of a big tree thing"

but i've finally figured out a really really good title, finally. i'm calling it manifesto. why?

i like the idea of a manifesto not being words but actions. and i think this work as an object is cool, but the actions of making it have been so fun, and the actions of interacting with people through it have been so fun, and i just love having this little space to do something stupid. i love the idea that the way a painting can communicate a complex feeling and narrative, the way a poetic phrase can hold within it so much information and feeling - i love the idea that this kind of simple rudimentary object can stand in place for my "manifesto" --

it is my thoughts and feelings and beliefs. i pour it into the work, i do it wordlessly. a wordless manifesto -- isn't a manifesto made to be clear? to communicate exactly what you mean? to communicate something?

this work doesn't communicate with any words at all -- even the word "manifesto" only really means "trust me, this means something important to the artist" -- there's nothing linguistic to use when interpreting this work.

and why the fuck are you interpreting my work? no, really. why are you trying to put this thing into a box? it could be anything - STOP asking me what i meant by it.

i think i've broken through this annoying fucking question a little bit. i'm so sick of trying to figure out what something means. if i have something to say, i'll say it. if i don't, i won't. making shit up for an artwork is stupid, it's self-defeating, it's dumb capitalist logic of trying to get your money's worth out of art school. i don't want to participate in that.

go ahead. look at this big thing. let it grow and get inside you and annoy you and wonder what's inside it, and don't bother going inside it because the work of getting on your knees is inconvenient. seriously, do whatever you like. it's your work, do what you like.

writing this, i realize i am angry with how much of a waste of time i feel like art school has been. the only thing i've been given is a little bit of knowledge and been allowed to sit in the cold water and let it get a bit warmer. i'm more comfortable with the idea of a gallery, i had a degree which gives me street-cred.

but i am angry. i'm angry that i can't control when my classes are, i'm angry that i'm required to be at a certain place at a certain time. and i don't think that's reasonable, i don't think i'm being righteous. i just don't think i'm very happy with where i'm at. i'm making something beautiful and i love the feeling of making it. leave me alone, forever, please. i just want to make it until it's abandoned, i just want to grow until i stop growing, i just want to breathe until i stop breathing. i just want to explode.

i ate a lot of haloumi cheese, i have a lot of energy right now lmao. i want to see my boyfriend and laugh and have sex with him. i might go for a walk.

i stand by everything i've written, in the sense that i have written honestly, although i suspect i'll feel better about the whole thing in like 15 minutes. i'm happy to have gotten this out.

i'm not really happy with myself when i'm angry, but someone recently told me the world was ending in a way that felt genuinely convincing, and it really shook me and made me feel like everything i'm doing is pointless. i felt quite shattered after that interaction. i thought i'd gotten over it, but i still feel really shattered. i don't know what to do about that.

maybe i should make this work clear. maybe i should write a manifesto and put it inside the big tower.

[coffee---bean]

some new actions (without documentation)

hi! today was the proposal day. the proposal was pretty meh, but it did help me figure out that a lot of this work is about frustration with the way the SCA shows off and marks work. it's always fast and end-product-focused and never seen by people and never considered. it never has room to change in public -- if you lose it and get it back, that's probably something you wanna keep to yourself.

that's kind of a problem with marking stuff, schooling.

anyway, i added in the blue light ball, but i haven't figured out how to get power to it (yet). i also covered up more cardboard over the work - it's looking great! the whole front and left side is covered now. the inside is now only visible from the staircase, which is great. the mystery is there now. hopefully my phone charges so i can take some photos and post them later.

in terms of new thoughts -- i was talking to newell and i was thinking about towers. i'd love to make the cardboard tower go the entire way to level 4. i think i have a very good shot of making it to level 3.

i need to buy zipties, i need to figure out a permanent power-source. i need to keep cardboarding, but luckily i have a few spots of infinite cardboard growth, and i have plenty left in my personal pile.

i was thinking about my old minecraft world from when i was a kid - i built a gigantic, empty cobblestone tower atop my house. it took ages and it wasn't fun gameplay - i just grinded for hours to make this tower as absolutely tall as it could be. i died a million times trying to make it.

towers!

tower of babel -- not really an inspiration, but i like pictures of it

the holy mountain -- one of my favourite movies, and there's a famous scene of someone climbing up a gigantic tower...

half-life 2 -- the final chapter, you ascend to the top of a tower. it's a huge climactic moment, it feels amazing as you get higher and higher.

dark souls -- the archtree, especially the great hollow, a long descent to the very very very bottom of the world. a gigantic empty tree.

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some new documentation (without thoughts)

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some new thoughts (without action)

tomorrow is another class day -- tuesday week 11 -- and i'll probably just adding more cardboard for ages. hopefully i can get a lot of it done! i can always steal cardboard from the bins outside ralph's.

i have some new thoughts about what i can do with the work that i wanna write down, although i haven't done them yet. just evaluate some stuff.

1 . idea from vicki -- a projector, projecting something into the water in the bucket. or a screen at the bottom of the bucket, flashing or whatever -- like will naufahu's work from last block with the flashing screen thing. it's an interesting idea!! i like it, but the idea of making it happen feels unlikely. it's hard to take out and adjust the bucket, and i'm just not sure. plus - it might be too complex? i'd like this work to made out of simple objects and ideas put together.

sort of pensieve from harry potter-ish... or lady of the lake... or the myth of narcissus...

2 . idea from connor chen -- to layer the cardboard like scales, and to wrap it all in fairy lights, like a christmas tree. that feels a lot more achieveable...

3 . idea from me i guess -- a big blue globe. i bought this thing from a cheap store because i wanted to buy a butterfly net to use as a hat, but i needed to pay at least 10 dollars. but i put a lamp thing in it, and it looks really cool. it could hang from the overhead chain and be a light source! i might bring it into school tomorrow and try to make it work.

yup! that's all. should be another update tomorrow after i've done something...

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wk 10 updates... (pt. 1, hopefully)

added a bunch of cardboard!

took the coins out of the water and threw them about the dirt, and replaced the water to get rid of the rust.

the cardboard is about 25% done i think? maybe a little less, it is a lot. i've realized that cos the floor is made out of cardboard, and the cardboard will obscure all the wire and poles, so from the outside, when it's done it'll just look like a big cardboard thing, totally weird.

i love the idea of a big cardboard witches' hat / street light thing, producing music.

so, if i want to finish it, i need to

get more cardboard and attach it until it's built

make the light ... exist ....

spend some time in it !!!

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updates as of week 8 ending !

i put the thing up a second time!

and i've made some plans...

recently i've been kinda depressed! i was thinking about my own happiness as a bucket with a hole in it, that's how someone described having ADHD. like your happiness doesn't remain, it needs to be constantly filled over and over. that's how i feel with depression - i need to keep doing stuff.

i had an idea to fill the bucket with water instead of dirt this time, because i imagined a wellspring of joy. a spring that natural water comes out of. very religious imagery!

thinking about a asriel suzie miniike review for the movie unbreakable -- "water is life and death...it is one of the base things that keeps us alive... yet it also obstructs and destroys. it fills our lungs... torrents of it sweep away and crush our homes... it nourishes plants just as easily as it would uproot them..."

and then connects this to the idea of narrative and self-belief -- "art and narrative as the most cleansing, illuminating, life-sustaining, inescapable force out there, pulsing through us in an intrinsic way. art and narrative as destruction, as uncontrollable death, as something to be feared. we find our purpose, we rediscover life. but what that means can be terrifyingly broad."

and also,, in one of my favourite books - the wind-up bird chronicle - there's a character called kano malta who lived in a mountain range with a spring of water that makes her psychic and heals all her trauma.

so i was thinking water bucket, surrounded by dirt. no more stick in the middle. (and no electronics, obviously).

i decided to push the work further in the corner, so there's more space for cardboard to build into, and to make the light. i bought ping pong balls and a torch to make it, and i'll install that on tueday.

i imagined designing the cardboard like a much bigger version of my cardboard street-light from two tables, and it kind of looks like a wizard's cap in my drawing. or candy mountain from charlie the unicorn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i was imagining constantly layering cardboard over itself, slowly building the work larger and larger - inspired by troy and abed's pillow fort in community.

i was also thinking about layers of deep ice containing bacteria from thousands of years ago, and how there's layers of ice from a long time ago, and the deeper you go, the further back in time you go.

so, the idea of layering cardboard and changing the shape over and over. i imagine people crawling inside the work, getting deeper and deeper into the past as they go. i'm not sure i can actually achieve that, in such a short time, though.

i was thinking about layering history into the work by drawing or writing or painting or spending time and filling up the vibe of each layer over and over, and then pasting over it like new wallpaper. and then inside this cave, a little wellspring. a metaphor!!!!

also i really should tape up the wire ends, cos they're sharp and dangerous. ugh but there's so many of them,,,

on tuesday i'm gonna move the work! add on the light! add in the bucket and longer pole, re-tape the cardboard.... that means i need to go to bunnings on monday!

okokokokokokokokokok

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i can make the wellbeing mountain!

yayayay

yayyyyy

[coffee---bean]

self-directed work -- seeking permission...

i wrote an email to my teachers asking for permission to put the work up, and i thought of some ideas.

i wanna build a mountain of cardboard around it, and you need to crawl into the work to get in. and it's all lit up inside. like the mountains of moria from LOTR.

i'm thinking of calling it wellbeing mountain and calling the metal pole and platform something like skeleton of mountain. i told connor about the name and he said he liked the "mountain" part, so i think i'll try something else - mountain-something.

everything everything has an album called mountainhead, which is very david lynch / eraserhead, which i respond to very strongly as an aesthetic inspiration for this work. but mountainhead is already taken.

mountain something....

the skeleton of merrick mountain?

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OFFICIAL MUSIC LECTURE in 5 parts.

MUSIC MUSIC MSUIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC BY TOM TOM TOM TOM TOM TOMTOM TOMTOM OTMT OMT OMTO MTOMTOMTOM

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1) what is music?

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2) the kendrick lamar 2024 singles

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3) what is a song?

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4) what is playboi carti?

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5) how to make music

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basic idea for the self-directed work

so, i'm a bit disappointed with the karaoke bar. it's been packed down now, since it rained and all. my new idea is to put it back up, with a slightly altered design, and to create work inside it all throughout the rest of the semester.

to turn it into a treehouse, a little tiny studio in a public setting. i want to create a weird little place for lots of ideas and going crazy.

the slightly altered design is a work-in-progress, but i kind of want that work-in-progress to be part of the work.

at the moment i want a taller street-light pole coming up, because i love street-lights. i also want to slowly add more and more cardboard structures and little details to the building, a mass collecting stuff like katamari.

or flesh expanding like akira.

sort of looking like the street-light i made last semester,

in the work, i'd like to make more music. maybe an album! something, but also do my other assignments in there, invite others. write down ideas on the walls or cardboard floor.

the next step is to get permission to put it back up somewhere in the OTC for the next 2-3 months. that'll be difficult, but not impossible! maybe even achieveable!!

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update on the Art+ work, and the self-directed work

hiiii

sorry about the lack of stuff happening for a while. i've been busy with genderbility and actually doing the work, and then all the catching up on things i needed to do right after that.

i'll do a bit of storytelling real quick.

so!

i made the platform at home out of foam and wood. there was a long process of listening to ghosteen by nick cave and glueing blocks to things.

slowly making as much support as possible.

then adding wood to help spread out the weight of a person.

and sticking poles all through it, drilling holes and making space for the middle-bucket-thing.

then, bringing it all to uni via my landlord di (thank you di!) and the bus.

i didn't really have any revelations or anything.

i packed it under the stair-case in the OTC.

and i looked for a space for it. the space under the stairs seemed good! but the women's courtyard has a big empty space, and the light and water sounds and people were nice. it wasn't as claustrophobic.

my phone camera is broken, sorry about the blur.

on monday the 9th i made a cardboard sleeve to hold the platform inside of with help from connor, tucker and portia (thank you thank you thank you). made from cardboard and duct tape, stepping on the cardboard to soften it. the sleeve was lame and simple, kind of perfect.

setting up the work on tuesday. poles, wires, dirt, chicken-wire, fairy lights, a chain. i really like the blur in this photo.

setting up the speakers and phone connection and the microphone, all coming up from underneath the platform, out of the dirt. audio going live into the microphone and coming out live from the speaker.

photos taken by connor (thanks!!). cut a hole in the fence, you need to crawl into it. sat and sang for a while, sometimes with connor, sometimes on my own.

then me and robyn and bec talked for a while about the work! robyn mentioned that i could try making music or do something in the space to push it further (i'll get back to that...)

robyn sang tequila and salote came past to sing. they're really cool, they crawled inside and sang something, although i don't know the song. connor sang fourth of july while we were talking, which i thought was lovely and i love him.

in retrospect i feel a bit blegh about this project. i think it looks cool, but i don't really know what it means or why i did it. it feels kind of empty. i guess i didn't apply the same meaning-making to the actual-making of the thing, maybe because i needed to focus on making sure it stood up and didn't break apart?

but that's just an excuse! in truth i don't really know what was up with my brain recently. in retrospect i really like two tables as a work and i'm quite proud of it. i think it wasn't pulled off perfectly but it feels good, so maybe this work will feel better later. i think this work is just called the kareoke box or something. the whole thing doesn't really have an identity for me.

i guess that brings me to my self-directed idea, which i'll do another post for.

[coffee---bean]

a bit of an update

hi blog!

a few things have happened.

the name of it is grace (untitled karaoke bar)

i've bought every single material i need for the work except for blue cellophane, and i also need to source some scrap wood and cardboard from my neighbourhood, but that should be easy enough. there's shit everywhere in haberfield, for some reason lmao.

the building is a little bit behind, mostly cos of genderbility and the recent passing of my grandmother. luckily it's going pretty well and i think it's gonna be fine... i don't have any photos but i'll send some through tomorrow, hopefully.

once again i am listening to this drake song and i love it

something i wrote down while i was in a room with my dying grandmother was

"what is my purpose here? i'm here to keep you company"

and

"prayer isn't... prayer is a performance. it's an act. it's the act of making it, like dance. it's performance. you need to do it. making art is a prayer."

recently i've been really really in love with Connor Chen and that's been really inspiring. i don't really feel happier or different, i was mostly happy before i dated him, but i am very much in love and comfortable and glad to be around this beautiful person a lot. i don't know if that's really influenced the work, but how could it not?

more songs that feel like prayers:

and

another weird thought i had, although i haven't put it into words yet

the idea of free will and god -- does god set our paths for us? does he decide the lyrics to the songs we sing? are we following the little ball bouncing over the syllables in the karaoke bar?

what if i had a little laser pointer and pointed it at the ceiling,

or i used a projector to project stars onto the ceiling?

hmm....

or projected a big white circle on the ceiling?

might not be worth giving myself extra work at this point...

but still, i like the connection between karaoke and free will!

anyway,, time to buildddd