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the best way to support libraries is to use libraries. go get a card, check something out. not a big reader? they got movies. they got games. yes, like botw and fallout and let’s go eevee. they also have cds that yes, we workers know you take home and rip to your computer. we also do it. 

if you have a well funded library you might even have access to maker spaces that have 3D printers. or video/audio recording equipment. libraries aren’t these tomb silent homes for books any more. they’re community spaces. they’re full of life and things. 

put a middle finger up at jeffrey bezos and support your local library

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i had the best human interaction of all time last night. i was sitting at a bar eating an appetizer and this guy comes up to order a drink and stares at my food and comments how good it looks. when i am drunk i use the word bitch like it is a comma, i plug it into any space in a sentence possible. so naturally the first thing i say to this stranger is, “go ahead and take one, bitch.”

he looks SO shocked and taken aback and goes “what did you just say? how do you know my name?” so i sit there for a moment trying to figure out what the fuck he is talking about, and then go, “…. bitch?” and he looks so relieved and tells me his name is mitch.

i cannot stop thinking about this. oh my god. imagine going into a bar and someone you know for a fact youve never met approaches you and says “go ahead and take one, mitch.” im cracking the fuck up. he looked like he thought this was the fucking truman show

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A frog…..is just a really green gentleman.

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Yesterday I overheard someone talking about how he was taking classes at the University of Maryland because they offer free tuition if you’re over 60. 

My brain IMMEDIATELY began scripting a screwball comedy in which a broke millennial who desperately want to finish his long-abandoned degree but is drowning in student debt pretends to be a senior citizen in order to attend college for free.

I’m picturing someone Channing Tatumesque, applying age makeup every morning before he heads off to class. It’s sort of a cross between 21 Jump Street and Mrs. Doubtfire. He keeps forgetting which hip is supposed to be his bad one. His classmates laugh every time he uses slang. There’s definitely a scene where he attends a college party and busts it up on the dance floor.

He catches the eye of a fellow returning student, a woman in her 50s, but she thinks he’s like 70 and she’s already buried one husband, you know? She’s not interested in doing that again. When his charade unravels (hilariously) at the end of the movie, though, she finds out he’s actually like 30 and has abs you could bounce a quarter off. And he’s still super into her. And really, maybe it’s time she gave May-December romance a chance.

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zombiesusingtheinternets:

damnthatswhatshesaid:

Significant piece of childhood, get your ASS on my blog

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the first avengers was a lot funnier than we gave it credit for. I remember not knowing it was coming out until the week it happened. some scenes looked like they had budgets of $10 million. some scenes looked like they had budgets of $10. robin scherbatsky was randomly there. it was the third movie with RDJ and he still looked energetic to be in the franchise. 2012 black widow who was the only black widow we cared about. everyone’s drama about why mark ruffalo was there instead of edward norton. thor’s dumb haircut and dramatic entrance. steve roger’s gay ass outfit. chaotic good.  

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Relationships get so bananas when you start deciphering the other person’s love language.

Like I thought I was just acquaintances with this person because they never told me details about themselves and we just talked movies and writing . But then they made time to have coffee with me and they showed up out of breath because they ran. Like. RAN to be on time for coffee with me?

And I was like “i don’t mind waiting” cause I never want to run

But they said they wanted every minute they could get because I’m so busy usually

Which is when it clicked that I didn’t get how much they considered me a friend because I just straight away didn’t see MY signs of affection in them and went “cool! Casual buds it is.” But now that I’m seeing their signs of affection, I feel a little silly for dismissing them like that even though I felt like we could be best bros.

Anyway, some people show affection through time or intensity or commitment and not vocally. I really have to remember that!

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Let’s just casually spread it until it becomes an actual thing.

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Mary Poppins Returns - December 19th, 2018

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This is my favorite dog in the entire world. Whenever I am feeling sad I visit their IG and just stare at this dog. If you are ever feeling down and need a cute animal to look at, please follow yorikokoro! you wont be disappointed!

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thor and gamora in their weekly “villainous blue adopted sibling” support group

thor: loki keeps stabbing me :(

gamora: so stab him back???? what’s the big deal that’s his way of saying hello