coleenvelasco-blog

[coleenvelasco-blog]

solace

I am at a retreat of sorts.

In this reality, I have no ways to communicate with the outside world. My life will only revolve around this tiny piece of land for the next three days. My world has shrunk tremendously. It is quiet here save for the soft whistle of the wind and the voices of my company.

In this reality, no one and nothing exists beyond the land we rest on. No beautiful but hellish city called Manila exists. No work. No chaos. No life. People from my past who have hurt me are nothing but a bad dream; current kindred souls and recent loves are worlds away, making me question if they were just figments from my imagination.

In this reality, I am but a girl who is revisiting days from childhood pasts; who is finding solace from the chaos of daily life in the city that is in pain and the realms that go beyond it.

Here I sit on the foot of this tree with the water a few inches below my toes, wondering if the life I lived was ever true. Had I ever left this tiny fragile world at all?

The people here hold no promise of pain intended to make you weep.

The ducks waddle so funnily and freely going wherever they please, oblivious or possibly ignorant of the dangers of the narrow path—much like humans.

The dogs are smiling as always.

And the trees speak to me in whispers, saying that I could abandon my path of suffering for a life of eternal peace.

I smile and admit, that is quite tempting.

It is quiet here in this reality. No masks. No schemes. No lies.

But nothing ever grows. Everything is stagnant and I do not wish to stay like this forever.

The trees smile back and say no more.

Night comes and the reality becomes dark. The sky shows a million tiny freckles and illuminates the house made of wood so faintly.

I still cannot see quite far but somehow I am at peace. There is a sense of calm in between my body and soul, and my entire being is filled with faith. I have no fear left inside of me.

And I surrender.

It is beautiful here. There is no hidden motive, no war, and no evil. Everything that there is simply is. Everything that you are is just as you are—no masks, no wounds, and no secrets.

Come as you are and let your weary soul rest, they tell me. Here, you are safe in this reality.