combat-cold-cuts - Tumblr blog

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Oh dang @bikerfish I have since changed my mind about this ten fold

@blundergato yeah… he’s my least favorite x_x

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Love when industries complain that they can’t find skilled workers. Like obviously you can’t bc no one is willing to train anyone anymore. They all want experience. Where are workers supposed to get it?

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So Master Splinter. Let’s talk about him. Because I’m here for another damn 20 minutes at work and it’s 2:30 am and because I can. I love all carnations of Splinter, but 2k3/2003 TMNT will always be my favorite because he is just so perf. 2k3 Splinter’s personality involved just SO FREAKIN’ much about family that it was/is beautiful.

So Pre-Mutation: He was a rat with something special, more intellect then most normal animals, but also rats are already super smart so just imagine that, but also just so much soul to him. He associated Tang Shen as his mother and Yoshi as his father. TO HIM THEY WERE HIS BELOVED PARENTS. So when they were both so brutally killed he suffered. A LOT.  This little rat could feel all the feels, and his parents were killed. And he was not okay with it.

Mutation: So, he’s scouring the streets to survive because though while his parents were now dead (and he tried so hard to save Yoshi!!!!), he is still a animal with animal instinct and when the tummy rumbles you gotta eat. So he witness’s the Turtles origin, and goes to follow after them, because he’s like “omg baby turts that are either very hurt or worse; I need to make sure they are okay.”. So he finds them in goo. And is like “I need to clean them and care for them”. So can we just step back and imagine if they had NOT mutated? pre-mutated, normal-rat Splinter would just be taking care of his little slow baby turts. Because parenting. Because that’s what his “parents” had been like and gosh dammit he was going to parent those sweet hearts. BUT THEY MUTATED. So his parenting skills and “I need to take care of them because babies and holy crap I can speak the things now” starts to kick in and WITHOUT question he’s like “I AM THEIR FATHER. THEY ARE MY SONS. I WILL CUT THE BITCH WHO SAYS OTHERWISE.”

Sensei: He knew. Sweetheart knew the MOMENT they mutated. He probably sat down and was like “Fuck shit. We are freaks of nature and the humans will try to cage us. I MUST TEACH THEM HOW TO DEFEND THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY ARE ALSO MY STUDENTS AND NO HARM SHALL EVER COME TO THEM.” So he pushes them all to their limits because he wants so desperately to keep them safe from the Shredder, from the world, and from scientists. Knowing how pissy humans are, he just keeps training them. HE IS SO FLIPPING SWEET I CAN’T EVEN.

Parent figure: He was both father and mother to the turtles, this is not up for debate. He is like the perfect combination of a Japanese father/Sensei and a single Jewish Mother. He kissed their boo-boos but also again pushed them to their limits (like the episode of Tales of Leo. Seriously Splinter…putting your own life on the line because you believe in your son. Go you. Also. If it hadn’t worked??). Like no wonder they (Leo in particular) worship him. He is the center of their world. He cooks for them (picture him in a apron, you know he wore the things), he cares for them, his love for them is not even in question. But he is also totally strict because holy shit–mutated teenager. Who are ninjas. What a nightmare!!!! He has to protect his boys!

Personality: The sass tho. Like…we all know where Donnie gets it from. How many times has Splinter thrown his hands up into the air and gave that “why the fuck do I try I can’t even” sigh? So.Many.Times. He loves his sons but he’s not afraid to be like “bitches stfu I will school you all in pain”. And honestly? When so many people are confined into a area 24 hours and they’re teenagers and a single parent, I’m amazed he hasn’t duct taped them to their rooms at times (lets be honest he probably has). Also can we just talk about his poker skills? SPLINTER WHO TAUGHT YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHAMP. And not to mention his little quotes. His quotes! He makes up the greatest quotes. “As the great warrior ”*insert name here*“ said in the 16th century…CALL AHEAD FIRST.” To compliment this sass though is a fantastic sense of wisdom that he has. Like seriously Sensei. Where does this wisdom come from? It has saved the turtles so many times. He is also compassionate and just all in all…fatherly. He’s that guy that you wish was your father because he encompasses everything people want in a father.

Martial Arts: He is skilled. Like let’s not even begin.

So that wraps up my Splinter post. I just felt he needed some love. Because he is perf. *see above post to confirm this*

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@blundergato yeah... he’s my least favorite x_x

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I’m really thinking Splinter is a mutated rat and not a mutated human in this version. My only evidence is that he eats silverfish off his feet and would name children after colors. I also think he probably learned martial arts from watching TV

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New ROTTMNT ep definitely made me think of this

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A). I never post on this account, I still come on tumblr sometimes and reblog stuff on @tunasammich so,  follow me there if you care I guess

B). I’m really pissed that playstation Vue doesn’t have Nickelodeon anymore and I can’t DVR the new Ninja Turtles cartoon :\

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This looks pretty cute, I definitely laughed at Donnie’s “I cannot fix this” 

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FIRST OFFICIAL TEASER: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

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look-look I drew smth not leorai and I’m proud, here��s the speedpaint

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When you sync an edit it’s lit🔥 “IB The Heavens”

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Disney: We’d like to get your permission to have Bowser cameo in this scene of our new video game movie

Nintendo: Sure but only if he holds his coffee cup in this specific way, we cannot have him be out of character

Ubisoft: Yo can Luigi dab in our game

Nintendo: Absolutely

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lil turtle nuggets with chubby legs and cheeks 

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Here we BWAAAH!

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You know, I don’t really log into tumblr a lot anymore. I feel like they lost me when I was constantly being added to the friends lists of porn spam blogs. Has that gotten better? 

I do miss reading a lot of your posts. If anyone wants my discord username send me a message. 

I wish there was a TMNT 2003 discord channel :P

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Pretty much my exact feelings on people whining about the Wii U ports and the Labo

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Adventures in Turtle Sitting

Donnie? Take it easy, bro.