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The answer to your problems is self-discipline

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it's been 3 years!

wow! if you can believe that! :)

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Rotten luck (on an apple)

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I was planning to take my afternoon walk earlier but it's now 4:16 pm and I still have to clean the room which will take approximately 30 minutes. I guess, I'll still make it in time for my 5 o' clock walk but it's only been 3 days since I rebonded my hair. I have to keep my hair as fresh and as clean up until Friday. I think I need the walk tho. I was just starting to listen to that podcast that babs wants me to listen to and I thought that it would be a great idea to finish the whole thing during my walk. other than that, I eat a little too much today so, I gotta burn some calories too. we'll see what happens but I think that I'll end up not going.

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Caught Looking (1991) dir. Constantine Giannaris

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sitting alone in vip 💔

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burdened with doomsday visions from the mold growing in my reusable water bottle

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hello hello hellooo

Yes! I am still here, alive and kicking! do I feel like I'm on top of the world? Nope. but then again when have I come here feeling like that, right?

I think I've mentioned this before but I used to keep another "Diary" so, that's where I've been writing all my woes and worries these days. it's been 3 years (can you believe it?) since I've picked up a pen to write something down for school. needless to say, I missed it. and I've also mentioned how I switched to CompSci. naturally this meant that I would have to spend a copious amount of time coding. so, opening my laptop and spending another 30 minutes looking at the screen, fumbling for the right words to type isn't something that I fantasize doing after a long day of coding.

I started watching Drag Race a few months ago and to say that I'm obsessed with it is a huge understatement. I've been so out of focus with my studies lately because of it. which I know sounds bad, but we'll get into that a little later. oh and before I forget, I got this cute pink mechanical keyboard because... I broke my laptop's keyboard. I seriously don't know how I'm going to F2F classes with this joke of laptop but hey, party. (DR reference: 1)

I wanted to write this entry solely because of one of the contestants that I am just admire so so much. let's just call him K (if you're a drag race fan then I guess, you know who that person is already :P) and ugh, everything about this person: absolute perfection. from his physical attributes, to his wit, humor and intelligence, it's insane. he possess everything that I want from a lover. it feels like I'm 13 all over again, possessed by the the "One Direction Infection" (I have never, ever not once in my life have used that expression so throw this gal a bone ok)

it feels... obviously sad (because I'm a grown ass woman obsessing over a celebrity instead of putting myself out in the market? or because I only have a one in a trillion chance of making this person fall in love with me? take a pick) because it's impossible. for me to meet him? not really, but to, you know. saying the L word once is enough. I've been listening to his and his friend's podcast on a pretty regular basis and I've also been watching his old periscopes lately. and as the day passes by, the more I get to know this person, ugh. He truly is one of the most beautiful, inside and out, people that I know and I just, adore him so so much it makes me want to cry sometimes :(

*sigh* so, I guess that's all I have for now. Oh, right. one of the main reasons why I think I'm gonna write here again and not my old "Diary" is I noticed that I tend to be reckless with, not only my penmanship which is not an issue here since obviously type, but also my grammar. but then again my grammar, sentence construction is shite. also I want to use all of the words that are hidden beneath the crevices inside my brain. comparing the entries that I have here on Tumblr versus the ones that I have on my diary, I tend to show those new words off, here compared on the latter. I guess it's that fear of one of my friends knowing that I actually have this account. jk miss thing, I DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS! AHHHHHHHH! anyway, I'll see you when I see you xx

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Patti Smith by Lynn Goldsmith, 1975

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