compendiumofsleepers

[compendiumofsleepers]

Why should you be wise?

Ola, the sun is rising and welcome to yet another page of the Compendium of Sleepers, full of information to wake you up. So wipe the sleep from your eyes, for today I'm going to talk about the much wanted wisdom.

Wisdom is a very broad, but also very deep subject, on which I could write an entire compendium alone. Don't worry, I'm not going to overload you with all kinds of old Chinese wisdom. I do want to give you a basis, so I'm going to tell you about what wisdom is and why you should acquire it, what understanding is and how you can increase wisdom.

What is wisdom?

Wisdom is the understanding of knowledge. Knowledge is gained during every experience. And an experience is anything you could learn from. A walk to the supermarket is an experience, because along the way you come across situations or moments from which you can learn. Reading textbooks is also an experience, because it is the intention that you also learn something from them. But learning by itself doesn't do much. It's nice to have knowledge, but if you can't do anything with it, it doesn't have a high value. Only when the acquired knowledge is understood can you do something with it. Knowledge lets you know, but understanding that knowledge builds rockets, I always say.

You may also know those slightly arrogant people who are super proud of their university degree. You would think those people know a lot. Until they start talking and it turns out that they do have a lot of knowledge, but they don't understand that knowledge well. You then get very strange conversations, which in the core are correct somewhere (and you assume that it is correct. After all, the other person has completed a high education), but which still leave you with an unsatisfactory feeling. It seems a human ailment to take pride in the knowledge they have, when much of that knowledge is misunderstood.

I personally have a similar story with the Bible. Everyone can read what it says, the book has been translated into all possible languages. The knowledge is there, but understanding the knowledge contained in the Bible is a different story. Is God really an invisible man in the sky who created the world in six days? And if Noah had to build an Ark with two of every animal on it, then that Ark should have been the size of an entire country. Why have we not been able to find such a large structure yet?

You see that having knowledge and understanding that knowledge are two very different things. If we understood the Bible, if we understood quantum physics, if we understood each other and most importantly, if we understood ourselves, the world would look very different now and we would all be very wise.

"Wisdom is the understanding of knowledge."

Why understand?

A conversation with or experiencing an act of another also leads to knowledge. Knowledge about the other. We like to talk to other people, to get to know them better or to tell our own story. Many people are herd animals and cannot live without each other. When we see the other do something, it also says something about the other. In other words, we learn about the other person and so we increase our knowledge. If this knowledge is not well understood, it leads to disagreement. If someone says something funny, you may be hurt or offended by this statement. Or you may find a statement very funny, when it was actually meant to hurt you.

Understanding is the invisible piece that connects knowledge with wisdom. However, it is by no means always understood that there is something to understand. Nowadays people believe in 'what you see is what you get'. One who laughs is happy, one who cries is sad, and one who speaks loudly is angry. But this doesn't have to be the case at all. Sometimes it is good to try to understand why someone reacts the way he/she does. Maybe that person wants to tell you something that is deeper than what your eyes can see.

Why would you want to understand yourself? You yourself are the foundation of your life. Only when you understand yourself can you live life to the fullest. Why are you so successful at what you do? The answer lies within you. If you understand yourself, you can probably sustain this success. Why does everything always go wrong? The answer to this also lies within you. As long as you don't understand yourself, everything will always go wrong in your life.

"In order to increase wisdom, you must first know yourself and then understand yourself."

Why should you acquire wisdom?

As long as you don't understand something, you can't do anything with it. If you don't understand that you can live your life differently, for example, you won't be able to do anything but continue living the way you always did. If you want to change your life, but don't understand how, then you will move on as usual. The moment you understand something you have grown in wisdom and you have a choice. If you find out that you want to change your life and you understand how to do it, you can choose to continue your old life, or to change your life. Wisdom leads to choices.

If the other person's knowledge is understood, it can be used to help or to destroy. If you understand that the other person reacts strongly because he/she is very sad about something, then you can choose to support that other person and offer a listening ear. You can also completely destroy the other person if it makes you feel good. Sad people are often not very strong in mind.

When you have gathered more wisdom you will see that wisdom always has to do with creation and nothing with destruction. So if you think you are very wise, because you can suppress everyone, then you are not wise at all.

How can you increase wisdom?

In order to increase wisdom, you must first know yourself and then understand yourself. When you understand yourself, you understand others too. People think they are unpredictable, but is that really true? Wisdom knows that everything moves according to fixed patterns. Humans are no exception to this.

If in a given experience the pattern is seen, recognized and understood, then the situation can be manipulated by making choices. This also works with people. He who is wisest, unfortunately rules over those who are less wise.

When wisdom has reached a certain level, it can even see how actions will play out in the future, based on understanding the past and present. Plans that fail continuously, fail because there is no understanding. Those who think they understand, only have misunderstanding.

Wisdom consists of layers and every time you think you have found wisdom, there appears to be a deeper wisdom.

Increasing wisdom happens in the following way:

1. Dare to experience If you only sit at home, isolated and afraid of the world around you, your eyes are closed and nothing is experienced. There will then be no knowledge that you should understand in order to become wiser.

2. Understand the experience Think about the experience. What was the experience? What was the situation like and in what order did it take place? Be honest and objective when (over)thinking. Have an open mind and be unbiased. The biggest mistake is thinking from only one point of view, while there are always multiple angles to look at an experience.

3. Test your understanding To make sure what you think you understand isn't misunderstanding, you'll have to test it. You do this by taking a good look around you and seeing whether situations give the outcome as you expected. And do people in those situations really react the way you imagined?

4. Keep repeating this step-by-step plan. In every experience there is something new to understand. Wisdom does not come overnight. It's a growing process. Just as you can train in gymnastics or math to get better at it, so too can you train in understanding to become wise.

With everything you do, from walking to cooking dinner, try to think about why you are doing it. And above all, look around you. Try to experience and understand what you have experienced.

[compendiumofsleepers]

What to do with your flaws?

Hi, it’s me again. Your personal wake-up call. Welcome to the Compendium of Sleepers, full of information to wake you up. Today I'm going to talk about flaws.

What a negative word, flaws! We don't want any flaws at all. The word indicates that something is broken, or incomplete. That we should go back to the store, or have a mechanic come over. We certainly don't want flaws in ourselves, because that makes us weak… or something. Is that true? Is it the flaws that make us weak?

What are flaws?

Just as everyone is born with talents, so everyone is born with flaws. You are no exception to this. A flaw is a skill or personality trait that is not or hardly present and is therefore the reverse of a talent. In between the talents and flaws is another area of ​​skills and personality traits in which you don't excel or fall far behind, but I won't go into that right now.

Flaws can be skills that are of little use and that no one wants, such as being able to burp or fart loud. It gets annoying when the flaws are in those skills or personality traits that are very much wanted in the world. For example, someone who lacks cleverness is easily categorized as stupid and is more limited by others than someone who has a talent for cleverness, for example.

People who have flaws in socialization or empathy also have a much harder time than people who have talents in this area. You are supposed to be able to interact with others in a certain way. Do not confuse a flaw with being able to, but not wanting to. People with flaws (everyone) really can't practice a certain skill, or only practice it at a very low level.

I know from myself that I'm not good at drawing and singing, I tend to get serious and sometimes I would like to be a little more naive. Among other things, I see these skills as my flaws.

You may have noticed that many flaws are called “diseases”. People who are socially and empathically less good are often labeled as autistic. People who have trouble keeping order have ADHD and people who have trouble understanding are mentally retarded.

Exercise 1. What are your flaws? List 10 skills and/or personality traits that are naturally absent in you. Arrange them from most absent to least absent. If you also did exercise 1 of the previous page (about talents), did you also notice that it is more difficult to write down your flaws than your talents?

Why is having flaws 'bad'?

In today's society it seems that everyone has to or wants to be perfect, and flaws are not part of that. I will give three reasons why having flaws seems to be bad.

1. The world is built on not having flaws

2. Someone wants to belong to a certain group

3. Others determine how someone should be

1. The world is built on not having flaws

The world is built on not having flaws. This sounds comprehensive and it is. Most of what man makes is made for the average person. A car, for example, is made for people with medium to high responsiveness. The one with very low responsiveness is most likely to cause an accident. The vast majority of schools are built for average students. Those with a low learning capacity therefore do not belong in these schools. Neither do those with a high learning capacity, but they go to so-called better schools. The schools for 'stupid' children are not seen as better. So it's smart, or so is the thought, not to come across as stupid. Because then you can go to a regular school. And it's not smart to show that you have a low reaction time, because then you might not get your driver's license at all.

2. Someone wants to belong to a certain group

The second reason why it's "bad" to have flaws has to do with the groups people want to be a part of. Many people are herd animals and need others to feel they are 'something'. If a group that someone wants to belong to consists of fanatical athletes, then that person will pretend to be a fanatical athlete as well, while he/she is actually not sporty at all. Or if someone wants to be hired for a job as an administrative assistant, when that person is not orderly at all, then he/she will pretend to be orderly to get the job.

"Just as everyone is born with talents, so everyone is born with flaws."

3. Others determine how someone should be

The third reason why it is "bad" to have defects is determined by others. The others think that it is 'bad' that you have flaws. In this performance society, you see it with parents who would like their children to do an education that they can't actually handle. Or young people who are evicted because of their sexuality. Employers fire employees because they can no longer perform their work properly and others are kicked out from groups of friends because the will of the group can no longer be met.

Exercise 2. Do you mind having flaws? Review your list of flaws and try to figure out why it's so bad to have flaws.

Why shouldn't we use flaws?

Perfect people don't exist. Who decides when someone is perfect after all? If perfect people don't exist and it's unknown who determines when people are perfect, why go out of your way to be a perfect person? I'll tell you why you shouldn't put energy into your flaws.

1. Too high energy consumption

2. Personality issues

1. Too high energy consumption

People can try to develop their flaws so that one day they won't be flaws anymore. But this takes an incredible amount of time and energy, if it succeeds at all. Can the difficulty be taken away from someone who has difficulty in learning, so that this person will become a rocket scientist within a reasonable time? Can a non-sporty person still win the gold medal? Can I suddenly make the most beautiful drawings? I'll tell you it can, but not in the usual ways. The conventional ways consume so much energy and yield so low that people get tired of them and do better to stop developing their flaws.

2. Personality issues

The other option is to suppress flaws so that no one sees they are there. A lot of people are guilty of this, but you see this most in superstars, business people and political leaders. Nobody is perfect, not even them. The danger of suppressing flaws is that you deny a part of yourself. You show others a person who doesn't exist at all and in the end you start to believe in yourself. Holding up the illusion takes a lot of energy, which you could use for more fruitful things. Not to mention what happens if you fail or lose yourself.

Why should we use flaws?

Everyone has talents and flaws. These two are so important that they are a big part of who you are. And you can be seen. If you show yourself as you are, your talents will stand out, but so will your flaws. Someone with a physical disability is less able to hide their physical defects and what you see is that understanding is shown for his or her situation. The same goes for old people who walk slowly. This is much more accepted from them than from a young person who walks slowly, while this young person can also have a handicap on his/her legs. Because these people are less able to hide their defects, adjustments have been made for them, from walking sticks and walkers to wheelchairs and prostheses. There are special (grand) events such as the Paralympic Games. Although the world is still far from being adapted to the average person, we are still trying to do something with it.

This does not only apply to physical defects. There are also low-stimulus facilities for people with autism, people who have difficulty dealing with money can get help, for people who have difficulty reading there are audio books, etc.

(Let me state that it is actually quite bad that in 2021 I have to name the previous group of people as a separate group, because in the end we are all people and there should no longer be any exception groups.)

What I'm saying is that you can use your flaws to create awareness. If you don't show what you are having trouble with, nothing will change. Not for you, and not for generations after you. People who dare to show their flaws are very strong and not very weak.

Exercise 3. Are you trying to develop or suppress your flaws? Why do you do that? Do you recognize the points I mention above?

I'll come back to exercise 1. Have you made it yet? I added that it is more difficult to name your own flaws than your talents. This statement is a bit tricky. I'm going to devote a portion of this compedium to different types of people, how they think and see, and how they act.

"You may have noticed that many flaws are called “diseases”."

There is a large group of people who did not find it difficult at all to write down their flaws. These are people who mainly look with their eyes and see what others can do that they can't. What others can do and they cannot, they will see as a flaw in themselves. This category of people is easily jealous and more prone to depression because everything they want fails.

Indeed, a smaller group of people would have found it very difficult to write down their flaws. This is because they don't want to see their flaws, or because they really don't see their flaws. After all, there are people who are not concerned with what they cannot do, but with what they can do, a very important principle that will be discussed later in the compendium and which many successful people take responsibility for.

Finally, the following: accept your flaws. Admit that you have them and that you have more difficulty than another with a particular skill or personality trait. You are perfect just the way you are, with all your talents and all your flaws.

[compendiumofsleepers]

Why should you use your talents?

Hey Sleeping Beauty, welcome to the first page of the Compendium of Sleepers, full of information meant to wake you up. Today I will write something about talents.

Talents are so ingrained in you that they are one of the fundamental building blocks of yourself. In this article I'm going to tell you about it. What are talents? Why should you use and develop your talents? Why is a lot of talent not used and what are the dangers of this?

What are talents?

Everyone has talents. These can be skills, but also personality traits. They were given to you for free at birth and throughout your life you should use them to achieve success and make life itself easier. Talents are present from childhood. It is not the case that you only acquire talents later in life. However, talents can be discovered at a later age.

Some examples of talents are:

One is stronger than the other

One is smarter than the other

One is funnier than the other

One can burp louder than the other

One can run faster than the other

One is more confident than the other

One is more patient than the other

One can cook better than the other

One is more eager to learn than the other

One can organize better than the other

As you can see, talents are those skills and personality traits that someone is naturally better at than another, or others. Most talents can be used in life. Some may not, like burping or farting. Although… there are quite a few videos on youtube of burp and fart competitions, just for fun. Even apparently useless or "forbidden" talents are still good for something.

Why should talents be used?

It is not for nothing that you have been given talents right from birth. You should do something with them. I'll tell you about two reasons why you should use your talents.

1. A creation is only as strong as its weakest link

2. People get energy from things they like

1. A creation is only as strong as its weakest link

People like to create. Not only artists, but also masons, dentists and scientists create something new every day. Whether it's paintings, buildings, beautiful teeth or solutions, they all transform the initial situation into something else. This process is called creation.

Let me talk about hairdressers. There are of course a lot of hairdressers, but we still prefer to go to that one hairdresser and not to the other. Why? Surely every hairdresser can cut hair after following a hairdressing education? True, but because there is so much on offer, and we can choose, we opt for that one hairdresser who can do it just that little bit better. Who has a slightly better view of which haircut I want, who can already say from his/her imagination that the haircut will not suit me, or who can cut it into a slightly better model. You understand that I want to indicate that we want to be cut by a talented hairdresser. A hairdresser who has, what all those other hairdressers have less or not. The funny thing is that people are willing to pay a bit more for this talent.

This also applies to buildings. The best building is built by the most talented masons, architects and contractors. They also earn the most. There is a relationship between talent and income. Nice to know, but I won't go into this in my blog.

"Talents are so ingrained in you that they are one of the fundamental building blocks of yourself."

2. People get energy from things they like

What I will go into more deeply is point number 2. People get energy from things they like. And what do people like? Those things they are good at! I can't draw at all. Sometimes I try to and end up grumpy. It's frustrating to have something stuck in your head that doesn't come out in the form of a drawing. I don't like sports either. I'm not good at it and it already takes a lot of energy to get myself to go to a gym. Writing an article like this takes no effort at all for me. I even enjoy doing it so much that I often write several articles in a row. Although it takes energy to write, it gives me more energy.

Again, talents are those skills and personality traits that you were better at than others from the start. You're good at it. And you get energy from doing things you're good at. So I highly recommend doing something with your talents, no matter how worthless they may seem. It is not at all true that only talents in commerce lead to happiness. If you can do what you are good at, you will automatically be happy.

Why are talents not used?

If the use of talents leads to happiness, then why is there so much unhappiness in the world? My answer: because most people don't use their talents at all. I will cover three reasons for this.

1. Fear of individuality

2. The will of the world

3. Unknown talents

1. Fear of individuality

The first reason talents go untapped is the fear of individuality. Everyone has a unique package of talents and flaws. This makes everyone unique, an individual. Misunderstanding of the term leads many people to believe that individuality makes lonely. After all, there is only one of you. This makes people pretend that they are not unique. As if they are the same as the people within the group they would like to belong to and their talents will not be expressed.

2. The will of the world

The second reason talents go untapped is to listen to the will of others. If it is discovered at a young age that you can fart loud, for example, there is a good chance that this talent is suppressed during your upbringing. After all, it is not appropriate to be able to fart loud. The people around you determine which talents you should have and which you should not. Hopefully you will find out later in life that many learned things are nonsense, and that you should mainly do what you like by using your real talents.

3. Unknown talents

The third reason why talents go untapped is the simplest. Your talents have not (yet) been discovered. There are people who think they have no talent at all, but this is not true (Maybe you know some of these people. Don't you think they often have a negative outlook on life?) Everyone has talents. It may be that the talents have not yet been discovered.

Discovering talents is not easy. Because you carry your talents with you from birth, they are not always visible to you. You think it's so normal that you can do it, that you don't realize that it could as well be a talent. By chance you have to find out what you are naturally better at than someone else. Never think that because you happen to be good at it, everyone will be able to do it. Often that is not the case at all, or not at the level where you can do it. It is also possible that someone else recognizes a talent of yours. Believe this person and start developing that talent.

Exercise 1. What are your talents? Write down 10 skills and/or personality traits that are naturally better in you than in someone else. Arrange them from most present to least present.

What are the dangers of neglecting talents?

Leaving talents untapped is not without danger. There are so many unhappy people in the world for a reason. More and more people suffer from burnout or become depressed. I will delve deeper into three dangers of neglecting talents.

1. Too high energy consumption

2. Continuous failure

3. Personality issues

1. Too high energy consumption

Developing a talent takes much less time and effort than developing a skill in which you are not talented. This is primarily because you enjoy working with your talent. You get energy from this. Second, the skill in question is already present at a high level, making it easy to develop further. If you want to develop skills that are not talents, development has to start from zero or less. In addition, you will have to put in a lot more effort to develop. If you want to develop many skills that are not talents, this costs so much energy that the energy will eventually run out.

"Most people don't use their talents at all"

2. Continuous failure

I can take singing lessons as much as I want, but I will never become a Celine Dion. I don't have a singing talent, no matter how much I'd like to. Suppose I didn't have this insight, and would give myself up for singing competitions and talent shows, I would continuously lose to people who do have a talent for singing. I would then continuously have the feeling that I am not good enough and eventually end up in a depression. This applies to all the skills that we would like to have at a high level, but have no talent for it.

3. Personality issues

Because talents are a big part of your person, suppressing talents causes a change of person. You present yourself to others as someone you are not, but your talents do not go away. They're there, but you don't show them. Because you continue to know who you really are and what you really want, you will become unhappy. Not to mention the jealousy that comes when someone else has accomplished what you actually wanted to achieve.

Exercise 2. Look again at the 10 talents you wrote down in the previous exercise. Are all 10 reflected in your daily life? If not, why not? Do you recognize the dangers of not using your talents?

Exercise 3. Do you use your 10 talents separately? Or can you also make them work together to achieve something bigger?

Finally, I want to press the following on your heart: find your talents and use them. Life is tough enough without you working against yourself.