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confessionsofaculekid · 1 month ago

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5/12/2025

I confessed to my parents about the cule.

Kyle was over for my grandpa's funeral, and he had suggested I tell my uncle and aunt first, see their reactions, and ask how they think my mom would react. I then told them after Mother's Day brunch. My uncle and aunt didn't have a bad reaction to it, and Rosanna said that she's sure that my mom would come around if not just be confused at first.

Later that evening, I lead the conversation about it being a surprise my second cousin had came from Hong Kong for the funeral. I then tested the waters and asked my parents if they knew about what was going on in his relationship (admittedly, I realized later the mistake I made of outing what was happening. Sorry Jason!). It seemed like my dad didn't think that kind of relationship is good, thinking that it's better to have a "normal" relationship. My mom thought that it must be difficult for Jason if he's not enthusiastic that his bf has another partner (fair, this also wasn't the best example. I wish I didn't bring it up).

Overall it didn't seem like they were freaking out over it, so I just said that "well, I have that relationship." My mom said that well this concept isn't shocking to her, since she's "read a lot of books and stuff." She was basically saying how she would rather be in a relationship where she knows the other person is as into it as she is. If she's putting in 100% of her effort into a relationship and the other person is putting in 80%, then she doesn't want to be in that and would leave. It seemed like the contention points of my parents is that things are already difficult between 2 people, and so it must be crazy hard with 5.

It seemed like they didn't necessarily approve or understand, but they weren't against it. They had a surprisingly lack of questions at first, but later on they talked to me a bit more. They were just saying that I'm their son no matter what, so nothing will change the fact that they love me. They knew I dislike hiding things from them, so I think they're happy about that still. I still reiterated that I still have the same wants and values: finding a career to support myself, having kids, having a family, living together...

My mom gave me the advice to really look within to know what I want, and not to lose sight of it. All the time, with her advice of rejecting someone who isn't into the relationship the same as her, I kept thinking about Michael and his unwillingness to truly let go of Ecko...

In the end, I feel better about not having to hide this from my parents. I just wished I didn't out my second cousin to do that (sorry again!! orz)

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confessionsofaculekid · 2 months ago

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Seeing Waigong 4/29/25

I saw my waigong today with my brother and mom. He hasn't been eating or drinking for almost 2 weeks now, so he was pretty weak. He was a lot thinner from when I last saw him too. He used to be able to grip my hand with surprising strength, but not today.

He mainly was communicating by shaking or nodding his head. He was also coughing up a lot of phlegm/mucus.

When ben and I drove home, I was telling him about my thoughts on death. How it's necessary and natural. Because our time is limited, it gives us the opportunity to live our lives, to grow and become our own persons, and to give us a drive. Death is sad, in that we (hopefully) leave behind loved ones who miss us. But that in of itself is a beautiful thing, because it means we were cherished in life.

The worst thing is to leave this world without living to your truest self. So I'm more motivated to tell my parents about the cule. Very soon.

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confessionsofaculekid · 2 months ago

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It was my bday 4/28/25

Just wanted to write what a special weekend I had.

On Friday, we went to go to Natsu's housewarming party for Kevin Tu and David Zhang. There were tons of people, and it was nice getting to chat with a lot. Kevin deadly sins also pulled me into the bathroom with him and Michael hehe.

On Saturday, Michael gifted a MH3 booster box, so 8 of us came together to draft. He also surprised me with a homemade dan ta. That made me feel really special <3 In the evening, we went to someone else's bday (Jonathan... something) who had a roast as an activity. Then we went to Steam for a fun night dancing.

Sunday, I had a fun morning with the boys hehe. Then had a restful rest of the day watching Pantheon, cooking, watching them play FFVII and Dark Souls, and talked a bit about the podcast.

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