confettihipster

[confettihipster]

end of 28 years later discourse: need danny boyle to come to my dad's house and watch top of the pops 2 and the new tricks episode with reece shearsmith and then we go to a fancy restaurant with lots of tory boomers and play a game my dad invented called "guess who thinks cliff richard is a paedophile"

[confettihipster]

the current list for things me and my sister are obsessed with is: ange postecoglou, the big ange stan account who is maybe pretending that he's ryan mason, rio ferdinand not knowing what the bird on tottenham's badge is, that girl who is in jail in georgia for drug trafficking, mount everest, china only having one time zone, people who give quotes to the bbc about buying labubus, the yank pope, the yank pope's brother who went to the white house and looked at a different camera to his wife trump and vance, cole palmer, thomas tuchel, jennifer lopez, the dodgy albanian shop in erdington which has a fish tank on the counter, the man united ariana grande bombing memorial tweet where they said "something tragic happened" with literally no further details, the pokemon plane ("being in the sky is a serious matter")

[confettihipster]

SPURS VICTORY HITTING LIKE CRACK RN

i actually forgot what it's like to be happy about football lmaoooo it's actually been 14 years of being crap! i don't think i've felt joy like this since the ben stokes superover

[confettihipster]

[confettihipster]

DON DRAPER AFFIRMATIONS:

GET OUT OF HERE

MOVE FORWARD

THIS NEVER HAPPENED

IT WILL SHOCK YOU HOW MUCH IT NEVER HAPPENED

[confettihipster]

when the new upstairs neighbour who walks around in a circle every night from midnight to 1am and screams whenever arsenal are playing and drives a car for utter cunts comes home with his forbidden dog. i hope it eats his face.

this is how i felt coming home from buying brioche at the co-op yesterday to find my upstairs neighbours bringing in their new washing machine so they can carry on doing laundry at 3am. i hate him i hope he falls off his illegal escooter and dies

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[confettihipster]

i have another bomb to throw, girls who hated pink and femininity in childhood were not experiencing internalized misogyny; it was a rejection of the conditioning pushed on us from birth which we never felt passion for and grew resentful towards because of adults’ insistence on us following the rules of being a girl. when you hit middle-high school and get more say in how you look it feels fucking incredible to reject and be openly hostile to the things you were forced to embrace your whole life. you people just don’t know what internalized misogyny is and tumblr choice feminism lied to you

[confettihipster]

i actually forgot what it's like to be happy about football lmaoooo it's actually been 14 years of being crap! i don't think i've felt joy like this since the ben stokes superover

[confettihipster]

the bbc used a picture of the end of my dad's road LMAO. that road is always covered in rubbish babes. the thing about balsall heath is that it is full of tramps but i'm not having some far right grifters say that. fuck off and leave us alone.

had my bins collected for the fourth week running. rip to everyone else in birmingham but i'm different.

[confettihipster]

i am sorry no one is a bigger diane apologist than me she tries so hard lol

[confettihipster]

small joy in how little we hear from boris johnson these days

[confettihipster]

had my bins collected for the fourth week running. rip to everyone else in birmingham but i'm different.

[confettihipster]

CRASH (1996) // WHY DON'T WE DO IT IN THE ROAD?

[confettihipster]

two work enemies sacked this week, this is what winning looks like in your 30s. this and i got to see them blockade the road so that the scab bin drivers could come in without getting swarmed

[confettihipster]

for the last four nights my dreams have all involved lewis hamilton dying and there being a princess diana/michael jackson level hysteria

does anybody else have vivid dreams where everything is the same except that someone is dead???? and it’s never like someone I know personally or care about that much, like last night it was that I woke up convinced nicole kidman was dead

[confettihipster]

GOT TO SEE MY PERSONAL ICON DANNY DYER IRL, SADLY THE MOVIE WAS PREDICTABLY BAD IN MANY WAYS

if there was a q&a i would have been booed for my questions. everyone else was a pissed up gen xer - the guy in front of me turned up nearly an hour late and drank six pints