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Hey, just so anyone whose mind isn't rotted by video essayists knows: The anti-LGBT film Lady Ballers produced by the Daily Wire was supposed to be a documentary. The original plan behind the film was that they were going to actually get a bunch of men to dress in drag and enter into women's sports, then record the results.

However, the barrier of entry for trans women to qualify for admission into women's sports proved to be prohibitively high, and they couldn't find any men willing to go the extra mile in undergoing hormone therapy and transitioning to the point they met the criteria for admission.

The Daily Wire accidentally disproved and discredited the entire concept of "men in women's sports", and were forced to turn the film into a shitty piece of comedy fiction instead.

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seals that make you go oo

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I don't care if this is real or not, i want this to be known as "having a rowling"

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person in fandom: eeeyikes!!! i hope im writing this character in this short little fanfic right >_< eeekkk what if my takes on my meta are all wrong and everyone will Kill me!!

guy in professional comic industry: okay lets mischaracterize every single character that appears in this comic for 50 or so issues

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Beauty and the Beast story where the Beast loves being a beast because being a beast fucking rules but he is still honour-bound to seek an end to the curse and give up his ideal form by finding someone who loves him anyway in order to uncurse his staff who didn't ask to be turned into various household implements

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Stormlight Characters Being Offered a Hug...From Hoid

Characters offered a hug requested by anon. :)

[Includes WAT spoilers in 2 entries--entries with spoilers are marked!]

Partway through writing this list, I realized that this anon specifically requested Stormlight characters, not characters in general. Whoops! I had already written 3 non-Stormlight scenarios. so I'll just leave 'em as a bonus and make the rest Stormlight. (This is also why I made it about Hoid, as I thought it had to be someone who could Hug across the Cosmere. But anyway, I'm just going with it.)

So if Hoid was offering hugs to (checks notes) Stormlight characters, how might they react?

1. Nightblood

Nightblood: Oms, oms, it's happening! Szeth: ...Oms? Nightblood: (Oh my Stormfather--Lift taught me that) Nightblood: I don't have arms, though! Nightblood: Szeth! You have to be my arms! Szeth: ...Can't this man simply hug you? Nightblood: IT HAS TO BE MUTUAL, SZETH

2. Kaladin [WAT Spoilers]

Kaladin (suspiciously): Is this some sort of necessary skill that I need, like when you told me to learn the flute? Hoid: It is a hug. Kaladin: But, like, a hug necessary to save the world, or...? Hoid: A hug because you look like you could use a hug. Kaladin: Well okay... [Kaladin & Hoid hug!] Kaladin: ... Kaladin: That was kind of...nice? Hoid: You are so welcome.

3. Dalinar

Dalinar: I must refuse. Dalinar: I only hug my wife. Hoid: But...Connection? Dalinar: I can offer a firm handshake. Perhaps a fist bump. Hoid: You are SO Alethi sometimes.

4. Navani

Navani: I must refuse. Navani: I only hug my husband and my toxic yuri science partner. Hoid: You and Dalinar sure are cut from the same-- Hoid: Wait, what was that last part?

5. Lopen

Lopen: Do you know, when I lost my arm, my mother said to me, "Lopen, it is because your hugs are too powerful, and the powers above feared you and had to take away at least one arm so that your hugs would be those of a mortal." Lopen: But now both my arms are back! So the mighty hugs can live again! Lopen: But are you sure you are up for a Lopen hug? Hoid: I'm immortal. I think I can risk it. Lopen: Very brave of you indeed!

6. Lift

Lift: Bear hug! Arms AND legs! Lift: Wow! You're so skinny! Lift: I could almost believe you're trustworthy! Lift: Almost. Hoid: ...Thank you?

7. Dieno

Dieno: Oh please. I've been escaping from hugs since before I could walk! Dieno: At least give me a challenge! Hoid: I was mostly just trying to give you a hug. Dieno: With just your arms??

8. Jasnah

Jasnah: [idly, not looking up] Oh, no thanks. I had a hug last month. Hoid: [The saddest, wettest eyes] Jasnah: What?

9. Shallan & Adolin [very mild WAT spoiler]

Shallan: Of course! I'll always hug the man who saved my childhood! Shallan: [hugs Hoid] Adolin: And to be honest...I'm just up for hugs generally. Adolin: [hugs Hoid...but for longer than Shallan does] Shallan (mildly): Always got to hug men longer than me, huh? Adolin: I haven't lost a hug duel yet, and I don't intend to start!

10. Renarin

Renarin: Oh, no thank you. Hoid: I respect that.

11. Eshonai

Eshonai: Wow! A human bonding ritual? Eshonai: So cool! Eshonai: Wow! You are so squishy with no shell! Hoid: Can't...breathe...hug...too...strong... Eshonai: Whoops! S-Sorry about that!

Bonus! The non-Stormlight Characters I accidentally wrote:

12. Vin

[Hoid is lying on the ground, huddled around himself] Elend: Right in the solar plexus, huh? Vin: H-He came at me with his arms stretched out! I thought it was an attack!

13. Tress

Tress: Awww, I'd love a hug, thank you! [Tress & Hoid are hugging!] Ulaam: What a sweet moment. Ulaam: Do you know what would make it better? Tress: ...I don't need any extra arms, Ulaam. Ulaam: So you've never head of hugmaxxing?

14. Kelsier

Kelsier: I love a good hug. Kelsier: A hug is like a smile--in a world like ours, it's a big "F you" to the powers to be to express small moments of happiness. Kelsier: That being said... Kelsier: I DON'T hug CORPSE SURFERS Hoid: What a strange personal rule. Kelsier: I'M NOT THE STRANGE ONE HERE

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This is the level of hyperanalystic bullshit I live for

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Basic life stuff on Father’s Day your dad may have never taught you

Men’s pants often have what’s called vanity sizing so a 32 inch waist between different brands is actually different sometimes. It’s still a good idea to try the pants on before you buy them.

A flathead screwdriver can be used on a Phillips head screw.

It’s always morally correct to simply walk away from a salesman. You don’t need to buy a mattress to be polite. Just leave. Walk away. Skedaddle.

A complete meal has fat, protein, carbs, and some kind of fruit or vegetable. A snack should have carbs and protein. That’s how you stay full for longer and get your vitamins. It’s really that simple.

Dumpster diving is legal in many countries including the US, Canada, and Australia but trespassing and property damage are illegal. If you are allowed to be in an area and can access the trash without breaking anything you can just take stuff

You should be thinking about retirement savings even in your 20s and 30s. Get a mutual fund.

If you go gambling, only spend cash and pull out exactly as much money as you’re willing to lose from the atm. Never use a credit card in a casino if you can avoid it.

You can add a layer of seasoning to a cast iron skillet right on the stove. You don’t actually have to put it in the oven every time.

To build a fire, build a little pile of kindling first with plenty of air under it. This can be sticks or leftover wood from the hardware store. Doesn’t matter. Then light some newspaper or leaves under it. This’ll help the kindling catch on fire. Then you can add a log to it. The log needs a long exposure to flames before it catches on fire.

Fresh cut wood needs to dry out for several months before it’ll work as either building material or firewood. Several years is even better.

Flower delivery for simple bouquets costs less than you think it does and makes a nice gift for people who are hard to shop for

University libraries often let the general public get a card to check things out from them for a yearly fee. This is useful to know if you’re ever doing some specific research.

To make hard boiled eggs easier to peel boil them with just barely enough to cover and let a lot of the water burn off. Then shock them in an ice bath when they’re done.

If you or your pets end up killing a venemous snake by accident or in self defense you should bury the head so that no animals get poisoned by it because the fangs can still distribute venom

Tall people who visit your house can see the tops of your cabinets and bookshelves. Clean accordingly if you don’t want people to see dust.

Annuals are plants that will die after one year and perennials are plants that live for multiple years

If you feel gross and like your life sucks maybe try getting a haircut

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I thought y'all might like to see Niagara Falls lit up for Pride.

Hope you had a good one!

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You have been visited by the Badger of Executive Function!

May this tenacious beastie grant you the strength to break through whatever is holding you back from completing that important task you've been meaning to get to, and the energy and motivation to

Do The Fucking Thing.

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Spell of avoiding spoilers

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Lorule Castle - The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds

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a comic i drew during the hiatus of miraculous ladybug season 3, when no one knew what marinette guardianship would be like. my theory was that ladybug and chat noir would each keep the kwamis for a week and exchange them on the weekends in a bookbag like divorced parents' custodial agreements. obviously i was dead wrong <3

my computer blew up so the comic will never be finished, but i found a screenshot of some of it and some written dialogue, so two pages have been recovered!

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