cortexchaos - Tumblr blog

[cortexchaos]

Post to avoid being nuked by staff

[cortexchaos]

“...yes, I’m putting a hold on the whole ‘world domination’ plans for uh. More or less 31 days.

EVERYONE better LOCK THE DOORS, PLANK THE WINDOWS AND PLUG EVERY SINGLE HOLE OF THE BASE. I am NOT dealing with “Bandicoot Month”!”

[cortexchaos]

“It’s bandicoot month?!”

[cortexchaos]

“I assume it’s a matter of using cheap materials.

...we really need to publicize our Evil Patreon more.”

[cortexchaos]

[cortexchaos]

This_Man_Is_Not_Straight.gif

For real though, the character animation is top-tier here. The arms, the outward wrists, the eyelid-flutter, the energy transitions from sassy mean girl to excitable Daffy Duck. The little anticipation tapping before breaking into the run. This is only game that made me like Cortex as a character.

I don’t know who animated this scene, but I can assure you, speaking from experience, there’s some stellar video reference of them acting out this scene on a hard-drive somewhere.

[cortexchaos]

Maybe he should just give up on the whole “using alternate dimentions” thing.

[cortexchaos]

🍑 INDI CRASH BANDICOOT 🍑 FOLLOWS FROM BANDICXXT 🍑 READ RULES PLEASE 🍑 NON-SELECTIVE 🍑 EST. 03/24/21 🍑 MUN IS NEW TO THE CRASH SERIES 🍑 LIKE/REBLOG IF INTERESTED 🍑 TRACKING THE TAG: BANDICXXT 

[cortexchaos]

oh God nobody gives that rat a sword.

[cortexchaos]

anon: So Cortex, where did you get the new lab coat outfit from? Makes you feel more like an evil scientist from the old one you had a few years ago.

“I made it myself, of course. I happen to be quite skilled when it comes to a needle and some thread.

It’s just yet another talent I figured out while growing up in that damned alternate dimention.  The thing you discover while you try to survive and make sure nobody has to make things even more awkward by walking around completely naked, huh?

        Seriously, it wasn’t fun.”

[cortexchaos]

deletesave​:

“Someone’s just upset that nobody will ever love them.”

 “                                                    hey--”

[cortexchaos]

“So I told N.Tropy to go fuck himself... 

...he actually did it, the absolute madlad!”

[cortexchaos]

“...what’s pog?

Anyone know what pog is???

Is this a new insult I don’t get it--”

[cortexchaos]

[walloftext is trending again?

you know what to do]

[cortexchaos]

storiesbehold​:

“Ohhh Shh-eets of paper–”

Of all the people in the universe, why’d it have to be Cortex this time. Why was he not where Lani-Loli and the other Quantum masks had sent him. Why was he always saying that stupid ‘surprised to see me again’ thing like almost every other villain ever?

“I-Impossible!” The Quantum mask stammered. “My siblings and I b-b-banished you to the end of the universe a while ago a-and stuff!”

…

…..

“…Did you have a spare rift opener or something on you this whole time?” That was literally all he was going to ask as he wasn’t in the mood to come up with another conclusion as to why Cortex was here.

Ohoho, yes! Delightful!! Cortex could complain as much as he wanted about how tired he was of his current situation, but seeing people - ...or, well. Masks. - being so terrified of him is always exquisite!

   ...of course, this one seemed to be afraid of its own shadow, but that didn’t really matter. Seeing one of the reasons his last plan failed quiver in fear at the mere sight of him is still satisfying. Small victories are still victories, especially when lately you can’t even frighten a fly.

“Didn’t you know? You four overrated pieces of wood aren’t the only ones who can open dimentional rifts whenever he pleases!

          ...which is. A little concerning if you ask me, but. Whatever.”

[cortexchaos]

mechaniize​:

✦ ━ To say Gin was simply naive at this very moment would be qualified as an understatement for sure. This poor scientist did nothing more than stand still for the duration of Cortex’s uttering; hands slowly fidgeting, nodding everytime he made a point while totally not realising what was coming next. It only took one simple touch of the missile for his eyes to widely open and–

❝ gAAAAAAH !! ow-ow-ow-owOW-OW-OW-OUCHIE— ❞ aaaand there it is again, one of the occasional chains of events occuring exclusively when these two are so close to each other. His reaction to his trusted life-support system being pulled with great force was certainly priceless, but also pitiful in a way.

       Why must it always be the rocket…

❝ M-M-M-MASTER I’M… pro-progressively repairing the damage c-c-caused !!! I-I-I WON’T MAKE A MISTAKE LIKE THIS EVER AGAIN ! I-I PROMISE ! I’M– ❞ he was just wincing at this point. It’s a good thing the rocket hasn’t reacted too harshly yet.

ok ok ok that was loud. A little too loud for his own tastes, enough to even let go of the rocket shortly after N.Gin started to apologize - surely not for the fear or that thing exploding, nor for a moment of mercy for his poor assistant - moving his fingers on the bridge of his nose.

It’s always like this. N.Gin makes a mecha, the Bandicoot makes it explode, he whimpers and pleads for forgiveness.              How annoying.

“Excuses, excuses, excuses! Is this all you got? I don’t care for your promises, N.Gin! I want to see you actually accomplish something! Make a robot that won’t go down if someone throw a fruit in their weak spot--

--why are you even thinking of putting a weak spot on them, anyway?!”

[cortexchaos]

“...maybe, if we put all those faceless fool in a pit against one another, we could solve the problem...”