coruscantknave

[coruscantknave]

nona the ninth

[coruscantknave]

Kevin vs. Quantum Mechanics

This is an autobiographical piece. Names have been changed for anonymity, but it's otherwise left be. ---

The class's first suspicion of Kevin was that he had, somehow, cheated his way up to this course. He just seemed perpetually confused, and strangely antagonistic of the professor. The weirdest example of this was when he asked what an ion was (in a third year EE class?), and was informed that it referred to any positively or negatively charged particle. It would have been strange enough to ask, but his reply of "Either? That doesn't sound right" sealed him in as a well known character in the class of 19 people.

The real tipping point in our perception of him during a lecture where the professor mentioned practical uses for a neutron beam, and Kevin asked if a beam could be made out of some other neutral material. When asked "Like what?", he replied "An atom with all of its electrons removed." When we pointed out that the protons would make that abomination extremely positively charged, he just replied with "So what if we removed those too?" and then was baffled when we informed him that would just be neutrons.

That's high school level chemistry. Not knowing it was so incredibly strange that I felt like something was off, so I asked him if he'd like to grab lunch. He accepted, we chatted, and I finally began to get a sense of his origin story.

See, Kevin wasn't a junior/senior electrical engineer like the rest of us. Kevin was, in fact, three notable things: A business major, a sophomore, and a hardcore Catholic. All three of those are essential to understanding his scenario.

What had begun all of this was actually a conflict with Kevin and his roommate. Kevin frequently had his fundamental belief in Absolute Good, Absolute Bad, and Absolute Anything pushed back on by his roommate, who was in STEM. Said roommate kept invoking quantum mechanics as his proof against Absolute Knowledge. Kevin was tired of having something that he didn't understand thrown at his convictions, so he decided to take a quantum course to settle things once and for all.

Despite not having any of the pre-reqs.

He'd actually tried to take quantum for physicists first, but the school's physics department wouldn't let him. It's actually pretty strictly regulated, because it is a mandatory class for physics majors. However, because quantum is not mandatory for electrical engineers, there aren't really any built in requirements for the class. It's just assumed that nobody would actually try to take it until their third year because doing so would the be the mental equivalent to slamming your nuts in the car door. Just, pure suffering for no good reason.

Apparently, the counselors had tried to talk him out of it, but if Kevin was one thing, it was stubborn. He'd actually had to sign some papers basically saying "I was warned that this is incredibly stupid, but I refused to listen" in order to take the class.

He was actually pretty nice, if currently unaware of how bad he'd just fucked up. I paid for the lunch, wished him the best, and reported back to the class discord. We'd all been curious about this guy's story, but now that I had the truth, I could share it with the world.

Feelings were mixed. Some people thought he was going to drop out any minute now. Others thought that he wouldn't, be also that convincing him to drop now, while he still could, was the only ethical thing. Others figured that a policy of non-interference was best: The counselors couldn't dissuade him, and if we tried to do the same, he'd probably just think it was STEM elitism trying to guard its little clubhouse. He'd figure out how hard things were, or he'd fail. Either way, it would help him learn more about the world.

We wound up taking the approach of non-interference. If nothing else, understanding his origins gave us more patience when he asked bizarre questions. He wasn't trying to waste our time, he was just trying to cram three years of pre-reqs into a one semester course. He did get a little bit combative sometimes, and we could tell that he was really wracking his brain to try and find some sort of contradiction or error that he could use to bring the whole thing down, but he never could.

First test came by, and he bombed it. Completely unprepared. He'd taken Calc I, but he didn't know how to do integrals yet (that was Calc II). Worse, he was far past the drop date. I imagine most people in his shoes would've stopped struggling. They'd realize they were fucked and just let themselves fail, at least salvaging their other classes grades in the process. Why waste resources on an unwinnable battle?

Kevin never asked questions like that. If he was stupid enough to try it, he was stupid enough to finish it. God bless him.

He invited me to lunch after the test and said that the class was more fascinating than he'd ever imagined, but he didn't know if he'd be able to pass it. He asked if I could help, and I said...maybe. I brought the request to the discord, and from the eight people there I got three volunteers who admired this dork's tenacity. He was in over his head, miles beneath the surface, but his fighting spirit was fucking glorious. If he was willing to go down swinging, we were willing to bust our asses trying to get him caught up.

Some of the stuff was just extra homework we gave to the guy. We told him he needed to learn integrals, stat. We sent him some copies of basic software that can be used to teach the basics of linear circuit equations, and he practiced that game like it was HALO. Just, hours sunk into it. Absolutely godlike.

He was still scrabbling for air at just the surface level of the class, but he'd gone from abysmal failure to lingering on the boundary between life and death. Other people in the class started to learn about Kevin's origin story, and our little circle of four volunteer tutors grew to six. Every day, he had someone trying to help him either catch up in some way, or finish that week's homework. He'd gone from being seen as a nuisance that wasted class time to the underdog mascot.

He was getting twelve hours of personal tutoring a week, on top of three hours of classes, on top of six hours of office hours, on top of the coursework. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that this kid was doing 40 hours a week just trying to pass this one single class.

Second test comes around and he gets a 60. He's ecstatic. We're ecstatic. Kid's too young to take out drinking so we just order a pizza and cheer like he just won gold at the Olympics.

After that second test, things hit another tipping point. With so much catch-up under his belt, he was able to focus a lot more on the actual material for the class. A borderline cinematic moment happened when I was trying to get ahead on the homework so that I could put more hours in on my senior project. Nobody else had finished it yet because it wasn't due for another week, so the specifics of the problem I was working on were still a mystery. I went to the professor's office hours and get some pointers, but he wasn't willing to give good hints when the HW wasn't due for another week or so. He said I still had time to think about it, which was true, but I wanted to be able to think about other things. Kevin had watched the whole conversation, waiting for his turn to ask the professor more simple questions, but when I left I got a text from him telling me to hop on zoom.

Kevin had finished it earlier, because Kevin started all of his homework the moment it was assigned. He needed to, in order to make sure that he could get it done on time. He'd finished it the day before, and was able to walk me through it.

From student, to teacher. I'm not exaggerating when I say that he probably saved me eight hours on that assignment. I could've kissed him.

A month or two later, we took the final. As soon as we were done, we six asked Kevin how he did. He was nervous, there was so much new material for him in this class that his retention hadn't been great. Us six were also a little stressed: We were going to pass the class, but the final was hard.

We waited for the results.

And waited. And waited.

Finally, the scores were posted as a table, curve included. From our class of 19 people, 4 withdrew within the deadline, 4 failed, 1 got a C, 8 got B's, and 2 got A's. We could see that the curve for a C was set at 59.2% overall.

We called Kevin. He was crying. End score, 59.2%. Teacher curved the C exactly to his score.

It was a week into winter break so we couldn't gather the forces around for a party like last time, but we were all losing our shit. Kevin was losing his shit. He couldn't believe how stupid he was to try this course, he couldn't believe that six people busted their ass just to make sure he didn't die, and he couldn't believe that the professor basically just passed him out of sheer effort alone.

He said it was the stupidest thing he'd ever done, and while I doubt that, it was outrageously stupid. And yet, I've never been so invested in a fellow student before. I'm prouder of Kevin's C than I am of my own B. I was walking on sunshine for weeks after that. In theory, my senior project was building a functioning washing machine, but in practice, in my heart, it was helping Kevin pass Intro to Quantum for Electrical Engineers.

(And as an epilogue: No, he did not renounce Catholicism and become an atheist like his roommate had hoped. He did walk out changed. I think that being that wrong about something, and realizing it, was a pivotal moment for him. It's hard to be dogmatic once you realize that a lifetime of being wrong feels exactly like a lifetime of being right, right up until the last two seconds of it.)

[coruscantknave]

[coruscantknave]

One guard lies. One guard tells the truth. One guard thinks he's telling the truth but operates from deeply unsound epistemological principles that were inculcated by his elders to steer him to specific predefined conclusions, he's not lying but nothing he says is as actionable as he thinks it is. One guard is honest but he's got that thing where he keeps confusing your left and right with his left and right, and even when it's just him he's always got to stop and think for a second to remember which is which, and long story short he's never once said the correct door on the first try. One guard says whatever the first guard to speak says because he's afraid of being left out. One guard claims the opposite of whoever was first to speak because he's a contrarian. One guard does that fuckass postmodern "what is truth" song and dance because he doesn't actually know which door is the correct one, he lost the briefing packet and for obvious reasons he can't pick a door to check in person. Defeats the whole point if you can come back

[coruscantknave]

nsfw sideblogs r so funny. my friend we can't talk here it isn't safe.. we have to go to sex world together

[coruscantknave]

the year is 2025

scientists are still scrambling to figure out what “zigazig ahh” is so that they can give the spice girls what they really really want

the spice girls are getting impatient

war is upon us

[coruscantknave]

i have finally perfected my twitter feed

[coruscantknave]

what is it about dumb but otherwise innocent youtube comments that turns me into the fucking grinch "whos listening in 2025" ill fucking kill you

[coruscantknave]

I love the power of color and how it can add environmental storytelling to an image

[coruscantknave]

The fight

[coruscantknave]

i am actually kind of fascinated by the worm fanfiction environment because it’s like. worm is fucking massive. there are a lot of works that are hard to write fanfiction for because they kinda say everything there is to say about themselves already within the pre-existing plot, but worm is not like that. worm is fucking massive. there are so many interesting worldbuilding details & character arcs we see implied but not played out in full that would be fun to make shit up about. if you gave me twenty minutes w/ a piece of paper and pencil i could probably come up with fifty different character-driven worm fanfiction ideas. 

like here: aisha introspecting about how her big brother carried her away from one of the worst days of her life but now she can’t figure out how to do the same for him. recounting of how 13yo alec escaped from heartbreaker. what danny was thinking and doing while taylor was gone. day in the life of the travelers w/ one bit from each of their perspectives to demonstrate all the different plates they were spinning and how inevitably those plates were gonna fall. dragon & defiant character developing convo while they’re chasing after the nine. I Could Go On. i don’t even have to bring AUs into it until i get into the thirties, probably. fuck it, if you wanna get real creative, write about the day one of the civilizations the entities previously visited got kersploded. there are a million one-off lines you could develop.

and yet. 85% of the worm fanfiction out there is just like. “what if taylor. had a different power that is less cool and thematically fitting than bugs.” the tedious convoluted AUs that would be the bottom of the barrel in literally any other fandom somehow comprise The Vast Amount of worm fanfiction. people will be out there putting characters in situations you did not know it was possible to put them in. why are we making our amy and alec dolls kiss, and more importantly, why is that one of the most notable alec fanfictions. it’s like a fucking rollercoaster ride of people seeing a universe with one million billion interesting characters in it and a bunch of free compelling narratives to explore already attached and going “Hmm. No. I want to see everything that already happened except it’s written worse and Taylor has Wolverine knifehands and keeps stabbing people.”

[coruscantknave]

GREEN DAVE I FUCKING GUESS

@horrorjerk ok i drew him green now fucking explain yourself

[coruscantknave]

I have been reading Batman and Robin Year One (it is safe following this comic because it's set in the past so DC can't affect it with stupid crossovers and also Mark Waid is a generally good writer)

And man, it's so fun. Dick is such a little menace in it, and I'm so happy to see Chris Samnee's art again, I LOVED that Thor miniseries when I was a kid, I even got it signed at a con! So cute.

Dick just. swinging around chandeliers in front of what he should know is a social worker. Just making Bruce's life harder for no reason. That is, after all, his job.

The double thumbs up...

Doing his job so well

"Oh but I am just a humble circus boy-- oh wait I forgot I have been adopted by the bourgousie HELL YES I HAVE MONEY". This is like. The most realistically twelve year old moment in all of Dick's origin comics ever. It WOULD be hard to adjust.

>:(. Smol.

And we've got a likeable Bruce who really is trying his best to be a good dad! Even though he is surprised Dick is not exactly like he was as a child and eats junk food? Watches cartoons? ignores entreaties to clean up after himself? Bruce didn't do that so why is he doing this he didn't know children did this.

The implication he was like "Father. Mother. Treat me like an Adult I am Mature I do not need things like Cartoons" even before trauma is funny. Would watching cartoons fix him, I wonder.

I also find it very cute he asks Jim for parenting advice in the latest issue. Because that's his only dadfriend.

"is barbara well behaved"

Jim: No comment. Let's leave that up to the philosophers. I think she does illegal hacking sometimes but I can't prove it.

Anyway it's a nice comic and Dick and Bruce are fun in it and the art is great. Comics can be good sometimes.

[coruscantknave]

Panels 1 - 10

[coruscantknave]

Been a really long time since I've watched Daredevil but I do remember coming away from it feeling like it presented a pretty compelling internally-consistent moral justification for the vigilante thing. You're not planet-crackingly powerful, it's just that you can hear, in detail, every awful thing your neighbors are doing to each other, every night that they're doing it. You can't not know and you can't pretend not to know and when the kid tells you the next day that he just fell down the stairs you can't fall back on the provided ambiguity to absolve yourself of your responsibility to act. Semi-relatedly, you're really really good at martial arts. Start the clock

[coruscantknave]

SUMMER SKETCH SALE!

Need a character icon or similar piece of portraiture art? Perhaps several of those things? You're in luck! In celebration of my ongoing persistent desire for any kind of active income stream at all, I'm offering a sale! For 15 bucks a pop you can be the proud recipient of half-body-ish drawings of the character of your choice, illustrated in this delightfully utilitarian sketch style I've been hammering out lately.

You can specify the character (fanart or OCs) drawing angle, and color scheme.

Reference images are appreciated; detailed descriptions are acceptable.

Revisions on color scheme and background only.

Opening eight slots to start with, filled on a first come first-served basis. Inquiries following that threshold will be placed in a queue.

I take Paypal and Venmo.

As always, a request for a horrid little freak of some stripe will play to my artistic strengths but relatively normal-looking people are also on the table.

You can find my commission sheet for more involved projects Here. I'll be running this more or less indefinitely through the summer because these are a blast to knock out. You can DM me here or on discord (@blastweave) if you're interested.