cosmama

[cosmama]

kikyo ( inuyasha ) / book!daenerys targaryen ( asoiaf ) / mel medarda ( arcane ) / rei ayanami ( neon genesis evangelion ) / yennefer of vengerberg ( the witcher ) / u should know who this is / squall leonhart ( final fantasy viii ) / tifa lockhart ( final fantasy vii ) / anakin skywalker ( star wars )

✧ — tagged by : @enshijou <3

✧ — tagging : feel free to steal!

[cosmama]

Hey there ! I finally making my soft debut. This is an independent, highly selective and canon divergent Makoto Kino roleplay blog ! Please consider giving this a like/ reblog so I can check out your blog ! Thank you so much !

[cosmama]

i need help.

im really really sorry to make this post. i know it's not the first time. im embarrassed im even having to resort to this again, but i've exhausted all my other options right now and im at a loss for what to do.

i've been struggling to find reliable work for the last few months. if any of you remember, i had been getting work experience at my local paper through the workforce center's vocational rehab program, which basically offers two three-month periods of paid work through whatever company you want to be hired at. the paper had been telling me for months they planned to hire me full time, they even told me my job was secure and i didn't need to look elsewhere because they really needed me. but when it came down to it, the day my program ended, they said they couldn't hire me. to say this devastated me in multiple ways is an understatement. not only did they lie to me, they used me for what was basically free work on their part, and then didn't even give me the courtesy of telling me their plans so i could be be prepared with a backup. the point is, i've been out of work since the beginning of july and scrambling to find something to replace it. they've allowed me to continue getting paid per article, but that's not nearly enough to sustain me. i need reliable work with hours.

i've applied everywhere. i've called places multiple times with no follow-up. either no one's hiring or students are still holding the jobs that would otherwise be available. i live in a small, rural town, so my options are honestly pretty limited and while im happy to look for work in a bigger city, the gas for the commute would end up costing more than the pay i would receive. but im still trying every job opening that pops up in my area.

all that to say, i have $13 in my account and my rent is due, which is $185 USD. i live in government housing so it's income-based, but even having no income, this is as low as my rent goes. i'm already in a payment plan to repay what i couldn't from december of last year, so unfortunately i don't qualify for another. my rent is due by monday, august 11th. after that, a $50 late fee is incurred. and if i still can't pay it, i will be served a termination letter. after 30 days, if i am unable to come up with the money, i will be evicted.

i have nowhere else to go. my family has exhausted themselves trying to help me and keep me afloat until i find steady work, and im eternally grateful for that, but i can't ask them anymore. they can't help me out financially anymore. i know this is a lot. and i wouldn't ask if i had other options, but even if i were to start somewhere today, i still wouldn't get my first check for a couple of weeks.

right now i've been low-key taking commissions from friends for blog starter packages to try and get some money in, and im expecting a call from starbucks sometime next week to discuss hopefully coming in for an interview, but other than that, im scrambling and im desperate.

i don't want to blatantly ask for money, so instead i am asking you to check out my ko-fi and purchase some of my things — and please spread this if you can.

if, and only if, you really want to donate with nothing in return, my personal paypal is below; but otherwise i'd feel much better if people spent their money on things they could use from my shop.

my kofi: https://ko-fi.com/faegfx

my personal paypal: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/etherealfae

my plate is pretty full with starter package commissions right now, but if you're interested, send me an IM or a message to my inbox and we can discuss the wait time.

im genuinely so sorry im making this post. i hate having to resort to the internet for this sort of thing, but i just don't know what else to do at this point. if any of you have any advice for quick work, please let me know.

thanks for reading.

[cosmama]

@cosmama whispered : ❛ have you been well since we last met little one ? ' <3

mother… 😭🫂💙 how wonderful to see you once again... ( unprompted ! )

the sudden manifestation of the cosmos is a soft and poignant welcome. iridescent light illuminates surroundings and instantly finds itself at peace with the entire universe that it inhibits. the familiar sight of her long billowing hair, adorned with silver ribbons of scintillating moonlight are ever reminiscent of the garden of asphodel that instantly soothes lost souls with the kind promise of repose and safety. a mother’s embrace and brightest salutation is a salve to every qualm that could be in the root of one’s heart, hastily woven with the aurous threads of norn. seldom are the epithets of both nyx and thanatos instantly invoked by mortal whisperings, unless approaching the eternal slumber ushered by the bright glint of atropos’ shears. elusive and enigmatic figures are they both, imagined to be swathed in the darkest of shadows, but so dearly fond of the purest and most tender light. a gentle smile, eyes excitedly aglow with the present unfurling of their unexpected reunion overtakes what thought could and might have been in the midst of strange and impromptu wandering.

mother… you once told me that i had to stop being so afraid of myself. i’m here. it’s me. i am who you once knew as death. you have allowed the treasure of my chosen name to grace your lips time and again. you respected, nurtured and supported my decision until the story had to come to an end. it renewed itself and thrived. it is my face that you have cradled in the palm of your hand when i shed so many tears, both of the greatest joy and utmost sorrow. you placed your wings upon my back and gave me the ability to ascend towards achieving my purpose in this beautiful world, my reason for being. you allowed me to simply be, leaving you behind for a little while, in order to pursue what granted me happiness. i’m sorry. i’m sorry for being so afraid. i hope i can show you everything that this world means to me. every little moment that i have been privileged to be a part of, even when i should not have been known as fondly as i was.

his hands extend warmly to her, the humorous detail made significant of how he slightly towers above her apparent in their reunion. there is a slight hold, in a small act of desperation to hold on to the perpetual warmth of her affection. their slender fingers intertwine, keeping each other close. the ethereal blue of his own gaze tenderly meets with the soft, patient and wise lavender of maternal being. the comfort of nocturnal skies with their company of stars prevails. home has returned once again. ‘ i really have. ‘ voice overflows with a myriad of emotions, an indescribable joy in the face of her arrival. despite being taller, being tends to diminish ever so slightly in the magnificent splendour of her presence all the same. a primordial existence with eons of memories and wisdom associated : deeply empathising with the plights and rapturous delights of other souls. she would never see him without a single thing. it is now time to return her selflessness, if such an act could see a modicum of what she has done for him returned in kind.

‘ how have you been ? i believe i promised you some hot chocolate next time you came to visit. you seemed so fascinated by how cozy and comforting such a drink can be. ‘ the invocation of beautiful nostalgia, an unforgettable moment between mother and son. he had handed her the definitive vestiges of his humanity to shelter her from the elements : a trace that ‘ mochizuki ryoji ' existed, for however short a time it was. ' the best part is when the marshmellows melt into the chocolate, as if it is a blanket of sweet tasting snow. it was a precious moment. i never want to forget that day we spent together. ‘

[cosmama]

[cosmama]

‘  one day i’ll go or you will.  either way, it will be as if i’m losing a piece of myself.  ’ ( do you remember when i said akari wouldn't hesitate to kill hotaru unlike usagi if she felt it was to save the rest of earth :))))))))))))))))))))) )

★ ━ 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 & 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊 ┊ @cosmama

𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 : where there is life, death shall follow. the birthright of stars was always meant to collapse and in the eve of their light lies their own devastation. it was always primordial thing to witness life's manifestation in the shape of you, followed by the arrival of the pitiful depths of her. light and death : from one messiah to another, locked by the grandiose of inevitability. you are the beginning : the mother of life and heavenly order. she was the end : the purveyor of silence and fated executioner. together they are meant to be the enigmatic equations to humanity's boundless existence.

and yet ... here lies another archaic decree : they should never meet. death must stay hidden, sealed, and forgotten. life must thrive, overcome, and survive. throughout these countless lifetimes across time : how many times did your outer-soldiers sealed her back to her faraway pedestal ? how many more times did she seek to destroy everything you held dear while wearing such a familiar comforting face ? death is never a stranger, and neither was the warm gentle embrace of your weary existence.

❝ it cannot be helped, ❞ sadden timbre unveils her own chosen words of acceptance. her heart is warm with remorse, no doubt an after-effect to your shinning beacon. things are different, she surmise. throughout the ages : saturn's orbit never truly connected to your vessel as she did with the trajectory standing before her. unlike the others, you understood solitude and all of its silence. unlike the others, you realize what it was like to stand your ground all alone and misunderstood. she, like you, knows the emptiness and weight of every difficult decision. you are tired, so was she. everything felt too heavy, and yet here they were. life and death // destruction and light. it was almost too comforting, if she allowed herself to admit.

❝ without destruction, stars cannot be born. without light, life cannot flourish. we stand on opposites ends of rebirth and infinity. you and i, will always be a part of each other. ❞ a faded smile manifest on the corner of her lips, and while there is still a heavy wave of uncertainty in the air, there was no denying the peace she felt in your reflection. the soul of saturn is not like the other planetary guardians. her spirit is an enemy, it is an ally, it is familiar, and it is the unknown. she understood your uncertainty well, and yet a part of her still continues to wish otherwise.

perhaps one day, she can earn a place to fight by your side. perhaps one day, things can be different. but for now, she understands and she hopes that some day : you too can understand her too.

[cosmama]

@cosmama we love the mama cosma.

[cosmama]

hehe

mother is home @cosmama

[cosmama]

coming to this blog feels like when mariah carey unfreezes herself in november

[cosmama]

Usagi hug counter: 16!

End of collection✨

[cosmama]

SAILOR MOON// Sailor Cosmos

[cosmama]

concept: art of akari blowing bubbles and it's just a bunch of galaxies

[cosmama]

i got sailor moon super live tickets hehe

[cosmama]

UPDATE : 1/17/25 .

I was really trying to avoid this, but I'm just at a point where I don't know what to do. I am currently -$104.71 in the bank and I am not making enough money to bring it back into the positive.

Here is the current situation with my job:

Last year, in October, I began working for my local newspaper. However, I am not an official employee. Instead, I am working through a vocational rehabilitation program set up by my local Workforce Center. This means that while I work for the paper, I am actually getting paid my wages through the Workforce Center. This is a 12-week program, wherein after the 12 weeks, I am to go under review to see if I qualify for another 12 weeks. After which, the paper will either have to hire me on as an official employee or I will have to look elsewhere for work.

As of December 31, 2024, my first 12 weeks has ended and I am currently waiting on review. In the meantime, I am still writing an article here and there and proofreading, but not nearly at the capacity I was prior.

I live in income-based housing, and have reduced my bills as much as I can, and I am receiving SNAP benefits and going to local food banks when I can. I am also looking for other work in case I am not approved for another 12-week program. In the interim, however, I am desperately trying to get my balance out of the negatives.

Unfortunately, with my current mental and physical health ( which I am in the process of applying for disability ), I cannot reliably offer graphic commissions right now. However, since it is my day job anyway, I can offer proofreading and editing services. I have a bachelor's degree in English and completed an online course in proofreading and copyediting.

If there's something you've written and plan to publish or submit ( online or otherwise ), please hit me up — I'd be happy to help! This can be anything! Academic papers ( I will proofread academic papers, but I will not edit them for you ), manuscripts, blog posts, websites, magazine articles, legal transcripts, resume writing, etc. I've been trying to bulk up my portfolio, so this would be a great opportunity for me to do that. We can discuss rates and pay privately either through Tumblr IMs or Discord, which you can ask me for.

If proofreading and editing services don't interest you and any of you would be willing to help out by donating, I would be truly appreciative and will include PayPal and CashApp links below. Even just spreading this around would help.

Thank you, guys.

PAYPAL : https://www.paypal.me/etherealfae

CASHAPP : $ethaeryal

[cosmama]

                            MERRY CHRISTMAS, AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

[cosmama]

[cosmama]

Something a bit brighter than normal! To be honest, I nearly gave up on this one entirely D: The original sketch I did (three years ago almost to the day, actually!) was really popular and I get fairly regular notes asking if I’ll ever finish it, but…I was kinda terrified of ruining it. I’m glad I persevered, though.