cosmicsupersass

[cosmicsupersass]

I’m Not Easy But We Can Discuss It

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she bermuda on my bahama until I come on pretty mama

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faceless grindr profile at 8 in the morning: have you ever been in a diving/boating accident? if so, could i hear about it?

[cosmicsupersass]

everyone more pretentious than me is an insufferable poseur and everyone less pretentious than me is a clueless philistine

[cosmicsupersass]

HATE that were calling every recipe Marry Me [Recipe]…. Fucking hate that. How bout Frig My Clit Brownies. Kill Yourself At My Feet Pasta. Shut The Fuck Up And Pay My Grocery Bill Cookies (vegan).

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(opening the author’s works page after finishing a fic) and if im lucky they’ll have written this exact same fic but different a bunch more times

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the person who realised you could rearrange the letters in gossip girl to read “go piss girl” truly one of the great minds of our generation, madam your legacy

[cosmicsupersass]

spring whale shark 🌷

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hate an x reader fic do not put me in a situation

[cosmicsupersass]

that man wont be a twink by the time im done with him

[cosmicsupersass]

All of the Beatles dying in a glue trap

[cosmicsupersass]

when i was at walgreens (at 3 in the morning which explains all of this) the cashier was talking to her coworker about how shed rather be a werewolf than a vampire because vampires are condemned to hell but werewolves arent and then she asked me what i thought and i said vampire because im already condemned to hell and she said in the nicest tone of voice “i dont think anybody is condemned to hell….” paused, stared at me for a few moments, and added on “…not even gay people” 

[cosmicsupersass]

The Twilight Renaissance came and went. Welcome to the Twilight Baroque period. Bring on the shadows. Let’s get dark and intricate (bring on the angst)