cowboyfairy - Tumblr blog

[cowboyfairy]

It sucks that there's only 20 minutes in each day. If there was more than that I would get more stuff done I'm sure

[cowboyfairy]

maybe this year i will watch two movies

[cowboyfairy]

always be ready to kill yourself at the smallest inconvenience

[cowboyfairy]

what's wrong babe you're barely anything

[cowboyfairy]

a customer returned a drink because a fly flew into it and said: “one of your flies flew into my drink” and my coworker was so confused that they just said: “…my fly?”

[cowboyfairy]

Bro I saw the cutest gnome ever on my morning hike today but it was an invasive species so I had to beat it to shit & death and berry it's carcass away from the glade 😭

[cowboyfairy]

we should start giving testosterone to ants

[cowboyfairy]

had a dream about getting addicted to vaseline on toast. my girlfriend crying, begging me to stop eating "that miserable greasy toast"

[cowboyfairy]

modern art exhibit titled "I bet you won't kill yourself" that is just a loaded gun on a podium in a museum

[cowboyfairy]

ahhhh so the guilt is NOT supposed to be neverending and haunting and constant and persisting beyond a doubt over even the most menial of things that i would not be upset at someone else for. i understand now.

[cowboyfairy]

commenting "ugh more ai bullshit" under my cousins facebook post of his newborn infant

[cowboyfairy]

I think it's very funny how many online gay ppl seem to either be uncomfortable with or altogether not understand the simple fact that sometimes dykes and faggots fuck each other. Like not even bisexually like idk girl sometimes it just happens it's fine

[cowboyfairy]

when you say "get rid of the cursed amulet," i can't help but notice a tone of jealousy. envy, even

[cowboyfairy]

My beautiful and courageous sons username and password are being killed by a freak called Sign in with Google

[cowboyfairy]

she suck my excalibur until I camelot

[cowboyfairy]

Dear Hiring Manager, PLEASE PLEASENPLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEAE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEADE PMWADE PLEASE PLEASENPLEASE PLWASE PLWASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASENPLEAASE. I look forward to hearing from you!

[cowboyfairy]

hi I'm the eraserhead baby can you send me $200