kate ( she / her ) • side / shitpost blog for @crappymixtape 🖤
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DnD mermay by @ maloviyua (inst) day 1 - Sun Elf ✨
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The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013) dir. Francis Lawrence
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yea sex is cool but have u ever been treated like a priority instead an option
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you ever see a man so fine you just wanna bite him out of sheer survival instinct???
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“I know you’re not okay”
Idiots doin idiot things.
“What’s going on with you lately?” Concern laces his voice, eyebrows raised in a genuine look. It made her stomach hurt, that look, but she forced a smile anyway.
“Nothing, Steve. Just tired.” She responded, turning away from him. But he wasn’t happy with that answer. He shuffled around the desk, almost knocking over the stack of tapes he had been rewinding.
“Hey, C’mon” He grabbed the stack of flyers she had been holding and set them on the counter behind her. “You’ve been quiet all morning. And last night you were too tired to go to the diner with us. Something is wrong.”
She shook her head, trying her best not to start crying. “Steve, I’m fine. I promise.” She tried to scoot around him, but he caged her in, placing both hands on the counter on either side of her.
“Please, talk to me.” He said it so softly it made her heart ache.
She sighed. “You know what, I just actually haven’t been feeling very good lately. Do you care if I head home?”
Steve stared at her for a long time before letting out a sigh of his own. Nodding his head twice, he dropped his arms to his side. “Yeah. Sure, I’ll let Keith know you went home sick.”
She gave him another weak smile, turning on her heel and heading to the back room. In the safety of the break-room, she allowed the tears that had been threatening to spill, to fall freely. She did not want to feel this way. This deep feeling of jealousy and hurt every single time she was in the same room as him. She quickly gathered her keys and sped to the front door, head down the entire time. She pretended not to hear Steve calling her name as she barreled through the front door.
It hadn’t always felt this way. She use to be able to spend all day with Steve without her chest caving in. They spent hours and hours together working and then stopping for dinner on their way home. Robin always by their sides. But then she went to a party with him and in a stupid childish game of truth or dare, he kissed her.
It wasn’t a quick kiss, not at all. He set the pace, slow and steady, one hand cupped her cheek while the other grasped her waist, pulling her even closer. Lips parted allowing tongues to explore. She was lost in the feel of him, bodies pressed impossibly close. And then Tommy H let out a loud noise and clapped Steve on the back, pulling him away from her.
He smiled at her as Tommy pulled him back into the center of the room. But it had been enough to set her skin on fire and send her heart into a flutter. She realized that she had wanted him to kiss her. And she had wanted it for a lot longer than she wanted to admit.
They never talked about it, and she was too scared to bring it up. Things went back to normal for Steve, but for her, everything had changed. She started noticing every little thing. The way he would mess up his hair by running a hand through it when he was nervous. The way he stuttered whenever he was trying to make a point or when he got frustrated. How he always put the teenagers first, even if it got in the way of his plans.
She noticed when he got red around the ears when Nancy Wheeler walked into the video store. Nancy Wheeler, who was freshly single and home for the summer break. The two of them didn’t take long to start hanging out again. And she started joining them on their dinner nights.
She knew it was ridiculous. That he and Nancy had a history, but she couldn’t help the way her heart split in two every time she was around.
When she reached her apartment there was already a voicemail on her machine. The light blinked red and angry, and she knew exactly who had left it. She knew what it was going to say; just a variation of the same thing he had been repeating all week. ‘There’s something wrong. Please talk to me.’ But she couldn’t. She wouldn’t ruin the friendship they had spent the last year building. He and Robin were all she had left.
She decided to spend the night watching movies. Curling up on the couch with a bag of chips and The Princess Bride for the 8th time that week. She needed comfort, needed distraction.
There was a knock at her front door that tore her from sleep. She hadn’t even realized she had fallen asleep, but the crick in her neck and the clock over the tv let her know she had been asleep for a few hours. She groggily stood up, stretching her back and neck as she walked to the front door.
“Who the fuck..” She muttered to herself, the knocking hadn’t stalled at all, a constant patter as she made her way through the small space. She was annoyed as she swung the door open. “What the hell do you—“
Steve was leaning against the doorframe, his hand still poised to continue knocking. He only looked vaguely surprised before he smiled and pushed his way past her. She stared at the now-empty hallway.
“You gonna shut the door?” He was standing some distance behind her, she could feel him fiddling with something.
She took a deep breath closing the door, but she didn’t move any closer to him. Instead, she leaned her back against the door. “What are you doing here Steve?”
He paused his fiddling, setting the remote back on the arm of the couch, and crossed his arms across his chest. “Well, we were all talking about how you haven’t really been acting like yourself lately so Nancy” she winced at the name, but Steve didn’t notice “suggested I come over and talk to you. Something else is going on and you aren’t telling me about it for some reason.”
He moved closer to her, taking a seat on the arm of the couch right in front of her. He didn’t say anything, just stared at her. He was giving her time to think about what she was going to say, letting her decide.
“I don’t know, Steve. It just doesn’t feel the same to be around you anymore.” She said it quietly, but he heard it loud and clear. She saw the look of hurt that etched itself onto his face.
He ducked his head, looking down at his worn canvas shows. She could see him shaking his head, probably trying to wrack his brain for what could have changed to make her feel that way. She stood quietly, hoping he would figure it out alone. She had no such luck it seemed.
“What do you mean by that?” He met her eyes again, the hurt still at the edges as confusion started to crowd his face. She just shrugged, but he scoffed standing up and taking a step toward her. “Bullshit.”
He was angry at her, actually angry. She looked at him with wide eyes. “I don’t know what to tell you, Steve. It's just different, ok? I don't know how to explain it”
“You don’t know how, or you don’t want to?” He laughed humorlessly. “I told Nancy you wouldn’t want to talk about whatever it is, but she pushed and pushed.”
“Oh and of course you have to do whatever Nancy says right?” She didn’t mean to have so much venom behind the words, didn’t even mean for them to come out.
“Is that what this is all about?” He asked incredulously. “You won’t hang out with us anymore because you don’t like Nancy?”
“No, Jesus. Just forget I said anything. Go home, let me go back to sleep, Steve.” She pushed away from the door finally, stepping to the side to walk around him. But he stopped her, grabbing her by the arm gently and holding her in place.
“No. I want to know what happened to make you not like Nancy, or whatever it is that makes you not want to be around us anymore.” It was soft, his voice low and calm now.
“Please, Steve.” A soft plea. She met his eyes then, those beautiful brown eyes.
“please” And she cracked. The sound of her name on his lips, just barely audible.
“We kissed. And nothing changed for you, but everything changed for me.”
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He’s looks so happy. I’m so glad he’s having the best time touring with his best friends 😁🥰
Via: Djotime & poonhghana insta
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