book one harry: *loses 2 house points* oh my god they’re all going to hate me this is the biggest atrocity i have ever committed in my academic career, i have forever tarnished the reputation of gryffindor house
book six harry: *loses 70 points for gryffindor* * almost gets expelled* ask me if i give a motherfuck??
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McDonald's cashier: Hello sir, may I take your order?
Julian: Ah yes, I want death
Cashier:
MC: He meant chicken nuggets
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Arcana as Vines
I’m so tired just ignore this. Spoilers? Mostly just for Julian’s route, I’ll label each one. My friend @adreana928 came up with a few of these. Let me know if you want a part 2.
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Ghost Lucio: I saw you hanging out with MC yesterday!
Nadia: Lu-Lucio! It’s not what you think-
Ghost Lucio: I won’t hesitate, b*tch!
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MC: Hey dude, you wanna see a picture of my cock?
Muriel, inside a bathroom stall: Hell no!
MC: (sliding a picture of a rooster under the stall door) Picture of my cock
Muriel: That’s a chicken, mother f*cker!
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(At the masquerade)
The Courtiers: (trying to take a selfie with the calculator app)
MC: What the fuuuuuuuuuu-
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SPOILER FOR JULIAN ROUTE
Julian, reversed ending: Don’t tell your mother!
MC: (shrugging) Kiss one another?
Julian: D I E F O R E A C H O T H E R
(MC is forcibly removed from the arcana realm)
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Nadia: (about to leave and turns back with a smile) Waaait a minute! Who ARE you?
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(Julian and Asra driving past Valdemar)
Asra: Hey duck! You’re no good duck!
Julian, from the back: You’ll never be SH*T
Asra: You’re just! Like! Ya father!
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MC: Oh wow! A man shellfish! I’ve never seen one in the wild before!
Muriel, trying to leave his hut: Meh? MEEEH! (Hiding back inside)
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MC when not playing Asra’s route: How do you know what’s good for me!
Asra: That’s my OPINIOOOON!
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Portia, buried up to her neck: I am the sand guardian! Guardian of the sand!
Julian: (throwing himself next to her) THE DEVIL QUIVERS BEFORE HER!
Portia: F*CK OFFFFF
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Julian, heading to the palace with MC: ROAD work ahead? Uh, yeah! I sure HOPE it does!
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Julian: (pooling together a bunch of smoke on the table to do a vape trick)
Asra: (blows it away)
Julian: (slowly turns to look at him) Asra!
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Valerius: (pouring one shot of every soda into his wine glass and taking a sip) F*ck you.
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Julian: Hey how much money do you have?
Portia: Like sixty nine cents
Julian: Oh! You know what that means!
Portia: (crying) I don’t have enough money for chicken nuggets
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Muriel, somewhere in the forest: Caterpillar rave! (Starts dropping a beat to caterpillars)
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Valerius: Hey how much did you pay for that taco?
Volta: Hey now you know this girl’s got her free taco- (trips and drops it)
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Mazelinka: Do you want to tell us how you crashed the car?
MC: Well, we were driving and there was this deer in the middle of the road that Julian didn’t see, so I shouted “Julian, deer!”
Portia:
Mazelinka:
MC: Do you want to tell them your response, Julian?
Julian: … “Yes, honey?”
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