crazyquicksilvertrash - Tumblr blog

[crazyquicksilvertrash]

Scott: Uh, I think I got your lunch. *holds up a note that reads: ‘We’re very proud of you. Love, Charles and Erik.’*

Peter: Oh yeah. I didn’t think this was for me. *holds up a note that reads: ‘Be good. For the love of God, please be good.’*

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Peter: I'm a confident adult. Nobody can bring me down.

*two minutes later*

Peter, crying: Dad! Scott stole my last pack of Twinkies!

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Hank: What do you want for your birthday?

Peter: A dragon.

Raven: Be realistic.

Peter: Okay. I want my dad to abandon his nonsensical argument about mutant supremacy and just welcome Charles’ speeches on love and peace and-

Hank and Raven: What color do you want the dragon to be?

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Charles: Why do you like being out in the rain?

Scott: The rain is just fun.

Jean: It does good to my mental health.

Ororo: Walking in the rain brings me illuminating ideas.

Kurt: I like splashing in the puddles!

Peter: I’m trying to get hit by lightning.

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Waitress: Are you two a couple?

Scott: N-

Peter: Is there a discount?

Waitress: Ten percent off dessert.

Peter: *puts his arm around Scott*

Peter&Scott in unison: Yes yes we are.

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Charles: When you see him please don’t freak out ok?

Peter: I’m not going to freak out. Whoever you’re dating I’ll always be accepting of them.

Charles: Alright, you can come in!

*Erik walks in*

Peter: Dad get out the way I’m trying to see who professor’s dating.

Erik:

Charles: *face palms*

Peter:

Peter: Wait…

Peter: *screams*

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Scott: If I ever accidentally hurt Peter in the training, I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night.

Scott: Partly because I’d feel guilty; mostly because I know Erik would be coming for my head.

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*peter and scott deep in trouble*

peter: in times like this, i wish i'd listened to what my dad used to tell me.

scott, barely keeping his shit together: ok, so what did he tell you?

peter: i don't know, i wasn't listening.

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Scott: What happened?!

Peter: Do you want the short version or the long version?

Scott: ...short??

Peter: Shits fucked.

Scott: What's the long version?

Peter: Shits very fucked

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Peter, to Scott, lying facedown on the bed, regretting everything: And then I called him dad.

Erik, downstairs in the kitchen with Charles, on the verge of tears: And then he called me dad.

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Pride Jegulus yes yes 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

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my friends: awe ron and hermione are so cute together

me: sure but hear me out, what if harry’s dad dated sirius black’s death eater brother

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Peter: When I die, my tombstone won’t say RIP, it will say VIP.

Charles: That's because they reserved a special place in hell for you.

Erik: Like the throne?

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Raven: Maybe Erik’s right.

Charles: No. We have a kid at home *points at Peter* and I will not let him be raised in a world where Erik is right.

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Erik: To save time, don't cook meat. Simply eat it raw and light yourself on fire to cook it!

Charles: No!

Peter: That sounds like a great idea.

Charles: IT DOES NOT!!

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Erik: I give up. I'm tired.

Raven: Quick, get the emergency supply!

Peter: *wheels Charles into the room*

Erik: AND IAM BACK BABY LET'S GOOO—

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Charles: Peter is taking some antibiotics and one of the possible side effects is hyperactivity.

Charles: Please pray for me during this difficult time.