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I wish things were different

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I just dont know what to do

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Another girl

Agian i need to share you with someone else.. You smell like her when you get home the next day,, sitting here like nothing is going on.. But you know very good that it’s not ok.. That you say ‘’i love you’’ to someone else and suck another pussy the next day.. You cant even look at me straight anymore.. 

Ow and the fun part is you are using our baby girl to get into her pants ‘Im a pussy, you have one, lets lick each other, happy birthday, ily’’ Really nice move of you.. 

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Plans

So im back from my trip to germany and im celabrating my birthday at my parents. And just when im finisching dinner you text when im coming back home, that i didnt say nothing and that you cancelled your plans for me so you would be home when i got there. And now you are annoyed cuz i didnt come home yet.. But how would i have known that you canceld your plans for me if you didnt tell me? So now you are annoyed at me that i didnt know that you cancelled your plans for me.. That doesnt make sense, does it?

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its my birthday

and im here in germany and you are agry at me for not being with you. You say im picking my family over you,, but that is not like that at all.. My parents paid for the trip and im sorry if that makes you agry and disapointed. But you just made it impossible to enjoy my birthday and im standing here in the most amazing place next to a castle in a beautifull forest. 

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Come with me to germany,,

I really want to go on holiday to germany, and i would like it if you come with me. Only im affraid to ask it, cuz i already know you are gonna say no. 

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Lets talk about sex,

cuz its amazing. Its one of the things we do best. You are the best i’ve ever had, you know exacly what to do, how to move, when to grab me or to tease me. Its amazing. Your hands on my big ass, your toung in my pussy or squeezing my boobs. Just thinking about it gets me turn on. Everything about you is amazing

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Positivity

A negative mind will never give you a positive life.

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My tonsils

My tonsils need to come out.. I’m scared, my last surgery was when i was about 8 years old.. With that surgery the doctor tried to put narcosis trough a line in my little hand. After five times trying to put the line in he said he had to try the other hand. After five times again he said he couldn’t find a vain to put the line in. So they gave the narcosis though a gas mask.

That day still traumatizes me. Im not afraid for needles, im not afraid for the surgery or for the pain afterwards. But i am afraid for the narcosis and how they are gonna give it to me.

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I dont wanna hate you

I wonder about a lot of things. But most of all I wonder what you say about me. Do you leave out all the good things? Do you tell your friends im the only bad guy?

I remember you like the day that we met. Even after all of the things that we said. Back then I never thought that we'd be here now. I don't want to hate you, cause I love you too much for that. You can go and hate me if you want to, but I'm not gonna hate you.

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Her vs me

I feel your ghost, smell you all over my clothes. You took my light and now you want to shine with someone else.

Why her and not me? What did I do for you to wreck it all? Why did you have to build the walls so high? I need you to know that I'm not done climbing.

I'm not trying burn myself but I can't let you go. I know we are not a couple, but it still feels dishonest. Like there is no truth in anything I've ever known. Finding out I'm not the only one broke my heart

You gave her unconditional love. You gave me conditional love. Tell me, why? No matter what i did, i did it wrong. But I'm still climbing, I won't stop fighting. I still wanna be with you.