cryptjuice - Tumblr blog

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[cryptjuice]

Has a worm ever gotten struck by lightning

[cryptjuice]

feb 2, elle emerson (@transsextual)

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utah bans gender affirming care for people under 18. / south carolina is following suit and worse.��/ i'd cry but i can't anymore, not like i used to. / my girlfriend tells me they're so tired but she doesn't know why – / "i wasn't even doing anything today" / our anniversary is this month. / i feel like a puppy when i see her. / i get high and rearrange my friend's fridge magnets / queer sentences cover the freezer door. / "eat the skin and hearts of men it attracts dykes" / "i kiss fags" / "feel it up partner" / "you may do it but use condom" - / we laugh about that one. we watch star trek. / their roommate calls me cool; we grew up on the same books. / another friend of mine is taking a gap year to go to brazil, relearn portugese. / the boy i dated who is now my best friend is coming up with my family in a few weeks. / we're going thrifting together on the weekend, and i / am going to try to get an extension on my paper. / dance rehearsal on sundays. / my roommates want to go to ikea. /

my uber driver mentioned his husband when i asked about his day. / i thanked him for it at the end of the ride, and he laughed and pointed out the trans flag sticker on the dash. / on my way into the clinic i think i saw him crying. / i introduced myself to the lab tech and she asked me to say my real name. / she took six vials of my blood. /

so many of my friends are named after gods. / this has to be for something. 

[cryptjuice]

So sorry to keep twitter posting but this had me dead

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nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

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this is the hardest any single image has ever gone

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local hooligans, the Newsom Boys, have been furiously scrawling quotes from “Wild Wild West” (1999) on church pews to corrupt young cowboys

[cryptjuice]

me when i remember it all

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me, mouth full of communion wafers to the point of choking: this *cough* is called *wheeze* ratioing the pope

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liberals tried to convince me to name my son squidward testicles.. … that isn’t woke ,,, that’s just mean

[cryptjuice]

bites down on my false tooth that contains a pill that makes me grow a real tooth

[cryptjuice]

Help