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turning the knife inside yourself tonight queen?

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notice how it's "with mama" and not "with papa". even in a fake cutesy tumblr scenario, she took the fucking kids. <- what I imagine i'd be posting as a divorced dad on tumblr

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catholicism is like performance enhancing drugs for people with ocd btw

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inspired by a friend misspeaking

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woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.

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I wonder if “we have to torture this special character. in the lab facility. with secret science.” is an interest all 12-year-old children share or were we just the generation exposed to Maximum Ride

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reading poetry forces you to ask wrenching, necessary, impossible questions, like "is the author stupid? or am I?"

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hey asshole! you lifted up the rock and now I have to scuttle! motherfucker!

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“oh no we need to practice for our fake dating” is the funniest trope to me cause like. there are so many people who force themselves into a shitty relationship they hate just because of amatonormatiivity that it’s an ingrained part of popular culture to joke about hating your partner.

which is to say, oh my god you dont need to hold hands and go on fake dates, you don’t even need to agree on a single detail of your cover story beforehand. you can literally stand 6 feet apart at all times and look profoundly uncomfortable and all anyone will think is “yikes™. not my problem”

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just saw my first ghibli movie. anyone else think the food in these looks good as fuck? 😋😋😛

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i find it v cute when rpgs offer me, someone whose sole strategy is “attacking enemies,” status changing effects. “this lowers your enemy’s speed” you know what else would lower their speed? being dead, from my fists

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how it feels to look at/listen to your own creations and enjoy them and appreciate how far you've come as an artist

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commission

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If I start my sentence with "Girl" I mean it in a gay way like I'm about to bitch to you about my coworkers who I hate and who I am nothing but nice to. If I start my sentence with "Maaan" I mean it in a tired teen boy way. Like Shaggy learning that he's eaten the last of his vile sandwiches

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adult friendships are so dumb like yeah i think i can find a time to hang. how’s february 17th at 4pm