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[cursedtm]

What does the pope know about robots that we don't? Why the sudden concern, Francis???

[cursedtm]

[cursedtm]

evansville, 09.22.18

[cursedtm]

@revoide said :  “ the  pride  in  my  heart  would  not  let  me  die.  “

sympathy for lady vengeance.

the  stranger  says.  does  she?  something  isn’t  right.  something  is  shifting.

LORRY :  𝙸𝙽𝚂𝚄𝙵𝙵𝙸𝙲𝙸𝙴𝙽𝚃  𝙳𝙰𝚃𝙰  𝙵𝙾𝚄𝙽𝙳.  𝙸𝙳𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙸𝙵𝙸𝙲𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽  𝙰𝙽𝙰𝙻𝚈𝚂𝙸𝚂  𝙴𝚁𝚁𝙾𝚁  𝟺𝟶𝟺.  𝙿𝙻𝙰𝚈𝙱𝙰𝙲𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶  𝙰𝚄𝙳𝙸𝙾…  𝚁𝚄𝙽𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶  𝚂𝚈𝚂𝚃𝙴𝙼  𝚅𝙾𝙸𝙲𝙴  𝚁𝙴𝙲𝙾𝙶𝙸𝙽𝙸𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽….  𝙴𝚁𝚁𝙾𝚁.

it  occurs  to  you  that  there  may  be  errors in  your  software.  the  lull  of  a  lack  of  sleep.  you  always  knew  it  would  be the  death  of  you.

LORRY : 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙿𝙾𝚂𝙸𝙽𝙶  𝚅𝙸𝚂𝚄𝙰𝙻 𝙰𝙽𝙳  𝙰𝚄𝙳𝙸𝙾  𝙱𝙸𝙾𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙿𝙾𝙽𝙴𝙽𝚃  𝙳𝙸𝙰𝙶𝙽𝙾𝚂𝚃𝙸𝙲  𝚃𝙴𝚂𝚃𝚂….

she  looks  like  your  mother.  

the  mother  who  cherished  your  suffering  has  been  long  dead  but  her  prudence  haunts  you  still, it  seems.   here then,  in  the  scar  tissue  suffering you  have  hidden  in  your  nape  perhaps  lies  a  bitter  and  ugly  truth  you  are  too  poignant  to  realise ( or  better  still: have  already  been  choked by ):  you  are  her  imposter-esque  descendant,  her  half-curse  violence  and  half-but-actually dead  malice.  there  is  an  absence  in  such  an  abyss  or  lapse  of  an  astound  memory  but  you  fail  to remember  the  act  of  dying.  there  is, however,  the  imprudent  afterthought  nipping  at  your  ear  much  akin  to  the  serpent  and  eve:  perhaps  you  simply never  died  at all  –  perhaps you  never  were  born.

you  cannot  remember.  it  was  bitter,  though,  and  you remember  your  own  feasible, malleable  hands. the  humility  and  mortality  of  it  all.

we  are  such  hideous  creations.

LORRY :  𝚅𝙸𝚂𝚄𝙰𝙻  𝙰𝙽𝙳  𝙰𝚄𝙳𝙸𝙾  𝙱𝙸𝙾𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙿𝙾𝙽𝙴𝙽𝚃𝚂….  𝙾𝙿𝚃𝙸𝙼𝙰𝙻.

there  is,  nevertheless,  the  echo of  heaving  a  decaying  carcass  in  the  act  your  mothers  deem  living.  you  remember  being  dead.  you  remember  lungs  aching  and  its  webs of  violence.  you  remember the  raw  fingers  down  your  throat  willing  you  to  live,  entangling  its  roots  so deep  in  the  fissures  of  your tired,  small  heart  chanting  𝘓𝘐𝘝𝘌 𝘓𝘐𝘝𝘌 𝘓𝘐𝘝𝘌   but  you  do  not  remember  dying.

you  remember  the  suffering.  is  that  not  one  in  the  same?

my  pride  wouldn’t  let  me  die.

but  yours  did.

she’s  still  shifting.  your  mind  is  playing  tricks  on  you.  the  stranger’s  hair  is  too  golden.  now  it  shines  like  chestnut  moss.  her  voice  sounded  like  death’s  lull  --  no,  did  it  not  sound  like  honey  lust  a  second  ago?  your  mother  is  not  here,  not  anymore.

 ❝you  mock  me.  ❞ death  has  come  to  claim  you  back.  the  stranger  feels  familiar.

you  cannot  bare  to  look  at  her.  it  hurts. 

 ❝funny.  you  remember  dying? ❞

and  then  there  is  now,  here,  in  this moment  of  being  not-alive  in  a  body  that  is  simply  not  your  own  but  is.  pandora  was  sculpted by  man – divine  of  metal and  sculpture,  but  his  Vulcan  hands  lie  absent  where  your false  body  should  swear  a  god  given  sacrifice  too.  he  has  forsaken  you  at  his  cutting  room  floor.

in  the  lies  you  comfort  yourself  you  know:  it was  her  love  that  did  you both  to  death.  perhaps  it  was  the  loving  that  was  the  dying.

[cursedtm]

“ i don’t want to look kind-hearted. “

sympathy for lady vengeance.

you’ve  known  nights  so  cold  that  the  body  could  barely  bleed.  gods  so  ravenous  their  hunger  knows  only  voracity.  foreboding  sacrifices  known  only  in  a  language  the  dead  can  read.  there  is  simplicity  in  this  statement  to  which  you  know  about  yourself :  you  do  not  know  gods  nor  do  you  claim  to  know  them.  not  of  the  circumstances  of  your  death,  not  of  fingers  forced  down  your  throat,  fingers  claiming  to  be  god  but  looked  too  much  like  your  mother,  demanding  things  from  you  you  were  not  ready  to  give  up.  not  when  the  Fingers  snapped  and  you  grew  wings,  your  body  devoured  and  spat  out  again  in  a  carcass  so  foreign  and  hideous  to  you  that  your  mother  claims  it  to  be  yours  ( for  all  its   worth,  you  know :  resurrection  hurts  too ).

you  do  not  know  of  gods.  they  do  not  want  to  know  you.

but  you  know  this :  kindness  is  a  type  of  hunger.

you  look  at  your  fingers.  trace  the  etches  and  paths  so  intricate  someone  who  wouldn’t  have  known  better  could  have  sworn  that  there  was  absence  where  the  blood  is  supposed  to  be.  someone  who  knew  better  would  peer  close  at  the  oddity,  close  enough  for  you  to  bare  grotesque  visions  of  fades  past  and  show  them  what  the  hunger  truly  cost  you.

you  wonder  if  she  knew  better.

I  don’t  want  to  look  kind  hearted.

the  words  are  vast.  perhaps  they  are  empty.  if  you  knew  better,  they  would  have  sounded  like  a  prayer  to  you.

in  this  dull  moment  of  weakness,  you  entertain  the  thought.  allow  your  eyes  to  descent  and  dance  over  the  presentiment  sign  of  ferelden  sown  with  such  care  into  the  flags  that  reign  proud  above  that  you  wonder  how  much  blood  the  seamstresses  drew  to  make  them. how  much  blood  the  flags  have  devoured  in  their  hunger  and  claimed  as  their  own.  you  wonder  to  the  sign  of  the  grey  wardens.  a  prayer  in  itself,  you  think.  to  the  roar  of  grey  wardens  whose  metal  swords  would  pierce  children  from  their  mothers,  skin  them  dry  and  wear  their  skins  like  fine  silks,  if  she,  the  sun,  willed  it.

I  don’t  want  to  look  kind  hearted.  a  god  muttering  a  silent  prayer.

you  want  to  ask  this  god  why  she  is  hungry.  why  she  is  finding  it  in  all  the  wrong  places.

if  you  wanted  to  know  her,  you  would  ask  her  that  is  it  not  simply  that  she  does  not  want  to  look  kind  hearted  but  to  not  pose  as  a  lie?  kindness  is  a  hunger  for  something  deeper,  you  know  this.  is  kindness  not  a  barrier  to  forebode  what  your  core  desires  when  you  have  infinity  and  nothing  at  the  same  time?  you  watch  her  when  she  leads.  when  she  fights.  you  want  to  know  if  she  sees  it,  too.  the  hunger.

the  hunger  to  be  vengeful.  to  rage  and  call  the  mountains  to  break  in  her  footsteps.  to  fill  the  ocean  depths  with  the  intestines  of  angels  who  wanted  to  be  her  but  never  could,  to  ravage  the  angels  who  dragged  her  by  the  throat,  lunged  her  through  hell  and  took  everything  from  her?  to  laugh  when  your  subjects  cry  out  in  anguish:  is  this  not  what  you  wanted  when  you  prayed  to  me?   did  I  ever  look  kind  hearted  to  you?

is  that  not  what  you  feel, warden?  you  want  to  ask  her  if  you  are  wrong.

funny.  too  bad  you  claim  not  to  want  to  know  god.

perhaps  she  is  different. perhaps  you  are  wrong.   it  is  only  in  this  instance,  in  this  very  brief  moment  with  each  other,  away  from  the  crowds  that  bow,  away  from  all  that  makes  her  the  hero,  that  for  the  first  time  since  meeting  her  that  she  may  be…  different,  too.

you  never  even  asked  her  for  her  name.

there  is  an  instance  where  you  want  to  say  something.  to  apologise.  to  know  her.

you  don’t.

instead,  you  swallow  her  image  and  try  to  dissect  god  from  her  stature:  the  face  that  of  a  plaster  saint  haunted  by  her  impending  martyrdom,  the  three  finger  sacrifice,  ravaged  arms  so  bruised  and  fleshed  wide  in  a  submission,  forced,  ugly  at  the  hungered  alter  of  a  god,  of  a  belief,  that  wasn’t  even  her  own  but  forced  down  her  gut. 

there  are  days  where  you  wonder  where  her  prayers  lie.

you  stare  at  her.

you  think  only:  one  day  you  will  die  for  this,  one  of  these  days  kindness  will  break  you.

you  are  not  praying.  you  are  pleading,  so  it  seems:

 ❝ ha  !  seems  your  maker  serves  you  bad  luck.  you  appear  as  if  you’d make  me  lemonade  and  tuck  me  into  bed,  like  a  sweet  little  grandmother.  perhaps  you  should  leave  here,   they  surely  would  not  want  someone  so  kind  looking  as  you  to  guide  them. ❞

[cursedtm]

[cursedtm]

My brother had done it. He created a god. But such is the case with all great minds, he was uniquely brilliant but also, uniquely troubled.

[cursedtm]

Who, if I screamed out, would hear me amongst the hierarchies of angels? And if one suddenly did take me to his heart: I would perish from his stronger existence. For beauty is nothing but the onset of terror we’re still just able to bear, and we admire it so because it calmly disdains to destroy us. Every angel is terrifying.

Rainer Maria Rilke, trans. Galway Kinnell and Hannah Liebnell

I have wrestled with the angel and I am stained with light and I have no shame.

Mary Oliver

Did you ever notice how in the bible, when God needed to punish someone, or make an example, or whenever God needed a killing, he sent an angel? Did you ever wonder what a creature like that must be like?

Thomas Daggett

How lonely to be something that nothing wants to kill.

Jeremy Radin

I was a winged obsessive, my moonlit feathers were paper. I lived hardly at all among men and women;

I spoke only to angels.

Louise Glück

Then an angel of the Lord appeared to him, standing at the right side of the altar of incense. When Zechariah saw him, he was startled and was gripped with fear. But the angel said to him: “Do not be afraid — ”

Luke 1:11-13

[cursedtm]

*·OH HERO, MY HERO.

@cursedtm  ♡ ‘d for a starter !

              she really couldn’t be blamed for the way her mood had soured drastically. yes, she was ferelden born and raised, yet despite the plights of the alienage, it’s become relatively clear that evadne tabris WAS, unfortunately, a city girl. there was only so much rain and mud that she could traverse though while hearing insistent bickering before her fingers itched to take one of her blades and fling it between someone’s legs as a WARNING. eva had picked up various companions since beginning this journey and maybe most of the tag - a - longs were made with too little caution, yet even she questioned her own choices with the particular companion that had been on her heels from the moment she had scowled when exiting her tent that morning, “  not today, i swear i can and will stab you.  ” 

you  begin  to  take  apart  the  deep  stitches  of  nightmares  plaguing  the  hallow  insides  of  your  nights.  consumed  by  the  very  vastness  of  poison  uncovered  beneath  its  rotten  threads  ( 𝐓𝐇𝐄  𝐕𝐎𝐈𝐂𝐄  𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐋𝐄𝐒 :  funny,  its  almost  appears  like  your  mother.  how  fitting ),   the  child  ravaging  inside  you  calls  out  in  a  sickening  naiveness  so  bespoken  and  foreign  to  the  likes  of  your  tainted  soul  that  its  enough  to  make  your  bones  bleed.   the  child  aches  for  the  warm  divinity  of  the  sun  it  longs  to  consume.  (  DON’T  YOU  KNOW  THAT  THE  SUN  IS  A  GOD  ONLY  IF  YOU  BLEED  FOR  HIM? )  simultaneously,  it  seems  evident  that  you  are  mutually  the  stitch  and  the  knife,  both  the  nightmare  and  the  vague  promises  it  serves  you  with  idle,  looming  fingers  ready  at  your  jugular.  the  poison  and  the  self  it  sinks  its  ravaging  claws  into.  you  only  have  yourself  to  blame  for  your  beginning  and  your  end.

you  had  once  thought  her  sun  was  strong  enough  to  undo  the  stiches, sinew  by  sinew,  your  hero  of  fereldan  and  clytemnestra  divine  who  the  chords  cheer  in  exasperation:  𝙨𝙝𝙚  𝙨𝙡𝙖𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙙  𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢  𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚  𝙙𝙤𝙜𝙨.

ostensibly, it seems hersun does not want to sink its light on the likes of you.

❝     evidently it seemslelianna has beaten you to it, dear warden.   ❞  softly,  carefully,  fingers  tips  curl  to  tangle  your  onyx  strands  steeped  in  sandalwood,  jasmine  and  vetiver  to  uncover  the  secret  cut  on  the  artificial  flesh  of  your  forehead,  jewelled  with  a  pomegranate  red.  almost  like  it’s  a  secret  forbidden  the  lips  of  the  two,  taken  from  the  gods.  you  adorn  the  blood  like  pearls  to  a  neck  as  you  quip  at  her  dishevelled  form  and  you  take  a  moment  to  wonder  if  clytemnestra  would  envy.  ❝   I came to ask of the events that surrounded thelatest purge of the tabris, the ones that claim you slaughtered them like dogs, no?    ❞

[cursedtm]

UPDATED BIO/STATS. carrd will be updated <24hrs. posted here for your convenience. trigger warning for suicide.

FULL NAME. august lenora singh-erriksen. BIRTH NAME. name withheld. ALIASES.

octavarium “o” no last name given (2014-). alternatively: OCTAVARIUM.EXE and OCTAVARIUM.CMMD

 oberon “o” sweetwater (2031-2049). oberon, for their mother anita’s love for the shakespearan play midummer’s night dream. the name further signifies o’s character as they are known to be: cunning. mischievous. reign of tricksters. possessing the thought that they can do whatever they want when they want and knowing exactly how to do so. for their two sides.  sweetwater, an ode to their mother, dr errikson’s involvement in its development. serves as a warning given the nature of the circumstances surrounding the creation of the alias.

 LORRY V.156.43

AGE.

> the alias OBERON is twenty four years old.

> the alias OCTAVARIUM does not exist on public records and remains undisclosed to the public.

> august singh-errikson… retrieving data…

> ERROR 08. DIAGNOSING…

> in relation to the paucity of understanding encircling the duality of human – machine age when inquiring for data listed “physical age,” sufficient nor accurate data cannot be given.

> hypothetically, if user august errikson had not alienated to anomaly fifteen point three nine point x, in which system creator dr errikson had transferred user august from their biological body into the MODEL OCTAVARIUM SERIAL #730 008 002, august singh-erriksen would be at the physical age of 53 during december of 2058. however, the statistics for this variation does not correlate to pre-existing health condition: aggressive osteoblastoma occurring age nine leading to severe bone degeneration by age sixteen, leading to inevitable death at an approximate age seventeen with appropriate treatment. approx. death is age thirteen due to variant one point x three – lack of appropriate health care due to financial issues and healthcare policies. system configuration highly advises for readers to be aware that this data may be inaccurate for the current path and its future variations of august singh-erriksen. please contact dr errikson or DELOS inc. for further explanation.

AGE AT DEATH. fourteen.

CAUSE OF DEATH: suicide. exsanguination.

> system advises that this data is not currently known to officials and under the us death records august singh-erriksen had past away during the system malfunction of a host throughout the westworld pre-opening stockholders soiree. this incident also records the murders of delos stockholders, dr errikson and dr ford, leading to a mortality rate of 113. system further advises that the correct date of deaths for both user august and system creator dr errikson does not corelate to the us death records and is in fact incorrect and occurred three years and forty seven days prior to the date recorded.

AGE OF REBIRTH. fifteen.

AGE OF APPEARANCE. twenty five. variations in relation to alias are sufficient to change.

SPECIES. human – machine hybrid. cyborg, however, this is yet to be a scientifically approved term.

ETHNICITY. korean.

CITIZENSHIP.

> the alias OBERON is a dual korean and british citizen.

> user august singh-erriksen was a united states citizen.

GENDER. nonbinary. PREFFERED PRONOUNS. they/them strictly. SEXUALITY: bisexual (bisexual is inclusive of trans identities)

DATE OF ADOPTION. 17th of march 2013. AGE AT ADOPTION. ten years old.

BLOOD TYPE. AB+

BIRTH MOTHER. name withheld at request. BIRTH FATHER.  name withheld at request.

NATIONALITY.

> the user august was of united states nationality. > the alias OBERON is of korean nationality.

D.O.B. august is of 12th of december 2003. P.O.B. august is of san antonio, texas.

EDUCATION. august has acquired high school diploma. attended internship with robotics engineers dr ford, dr weber and ai specialist dr errikson. internship terminated after ten months for unknown reasons as requested by dr ford and dr weber upon the leave of dr errikson. home schooled from adoption under dr singh and dr errikson, furthering their knowledge of robotics, ai theory, intellectual technology, english, creative writing and international laws. noted: an advanced learner. understood relevant principles for ai, it and robotics in minutes. lacked fluency in english, laws and writing theory as noted by dr singh, adopted parent.

OCCUPATION.

> the user OBERON “O” is a technologist hired for INCITE as per request of liam dempsy, co-CEO of INCITE, in the years 2049-2055 shortly after the pair met at a party in 2049. this was after serac froze jean mi after convincing his brother that his fiancée (o) left him for greed (2048) when in fact he, serac, forced o into the first instance of INCITE’s reconditioning therapy (2047). the goal o possessed in this instance was to gain control of rehoboam, mirroring delores’ in 2058. this, in both instances, proved futile. the reconditioning o was exposed to in the years prior sought to be constraining on their grip of self and memory, slipping in and out, and therefore was their downfall in gaining control and executing their initial plans, leading to their third loop.

AFFILIATIONS.

> the alias OBERON is a minor stockholder in INCITE. the alias holds <2% of company shareholds as a gift from liam dempsy, co-ceo and minor controller of rehoboam. in specific, oberon holds majority stocks in INCITE’s failed reconditioning therapy in mexico. the gift in and of itself has no real meaning and is useless for any financial benefit. however, they are the only stocks vital for o’s initial planning.

> the alias OCTAVARIUM is a major silent stockholder and silent director in DELOS inc. after accumulating the majority after the westworld massacre which saw stocks plummet (54% in the year 2019). amongst these stocks, o has distributed the stocks between thirty six people, of whom are active directors that act in o’s absence. whatever these stockholders, previously incomers living below the poverty line, chooses to do with their power is up to them, only until it isn’t. this is the terms of the contract they signed with the unknown o.

> the alias known simply as “o”, works alongside brothers engerraund and later lover jean mi serac, to aid (and thereby unknowingly – to the brother’s knowledge - sabotage) the serac brothers into creating failed prototypes sol and david whose goal is to predict and guide human behaviour (2029-2031). the goal to sabotage was to prolong the system’s purpose until o could find a use for it in their plans.

> “o” created the implant and its discs that correspond with the successful prototype solomon and its successor rehoboam. o’s disks and implants aid solomon in feeding the system updated information on the day to day decisions of the users in order to further predict their future outcomes – thereby predicting the course of humanity’s fate. the data is also anonymous syphoned by o to feed them information which is needed to formulate the accuracy of their plan.

DISKS and its daily ingested IMPLANTS help control a human’s bodily and mental behaviours. they regulate sleep, moods, senses, blood levels, hormones, surrounding technology such as home security (requires subscriptions), etc.

o’s disks and implants have become a systematic norm in society as it progresses thanks to INCITE’s influence over government procedures. those who neglect to activate their implant nor ingest discs are systematically doomed to fail and, due to their lack of jobs, healthcare, food and housing in association with their turned off implant, die.

> this allows o to create an application called RICO, an app that allows degenerates – those who are lower class and either cannot afford to keep their implants on or chooses to keep them off (in other words, people who are invisible to rehoboam – to engage in illegal activities warranted from and paid from anonymous sources. INCITE is under the impression that o conceived the program in order to allow INCITE the ability to engage reconditioned outliers to hunt the unconditioned ones who lie a threat to rehoboam’s plan. while the program does run under this purpose, the initial purpose was to allow o to hire anonymous and untraceable users to aid in conducting miscellaneous missions which help advance their plans, unknown to INCITE’s eye.

> it is later discovered by engerraund serac, after his knowledge of o’s true nature since forcing them under solomon’s experimental reconditioning therapy, that he takes control of o’s shared stocks in INCITE and DELOS. here, upon exposing the truth of o to jean mi, engerraund discovers from jean mi of dr ford’s library of guest data, knowledge that is only known by o and the ceo of delos.

LANGUAGES. infinite. subject to the delos mainframe.

HEIGHT. 166cm. WEIGHT. 52kg.

EYES. obsidian. HAIR. tidy but long. black. well kept. black. BODY. small. lithe. titanium. built to withstand.

FACECLAIM. jung jaewon. VOICE CLAIM. ashe.

SIBLINGS. none. biologically unknown as parental names are withheld from the system.

PERSONAILITY.

> the alias OBERON is a party goer. narcotics veined. dinoysus born. player, brilliant in their works, a low born who managed to outrank the lot of them. a value to INCITE. earnt the respect of the blue bloods by befriending the low self esteem liam stempsy when they were sixteen.  

> o is aggressive. quiet. manipulative. cunning. serves no purpose in interacting with others unless the person is needed to advance their plans. this is met with a personality that contours to the need of the person.

due to the reconditioning therapy, the lines between themselves and the aliases blur.

PHOBIAS.  hemophobia – the fear of blood.

ZODIAC. sagittarius

MBTI. INTJ

intjs are analytical problem-solvers, eager to improve systems and processes with their innovative ideas. they have a talent for seeing possibilities for improvement, whether at work, at home, or in themselves.

often intellectual, intjs enjoy logical reasoning and complex problem-solving. they approach life by analyzing the theory behind what they see, and are typically focused inward, on their own thoughtful study of the world around them. intjs are drawn to logical systems and are much less comfortable with the unpredictable nature of other people and their emotions. they are typically independent and selective about their relationships, preferring to associate with people who they find intellectually stimulating.

TEMPERMANT.  melancholic

ENNEGRAM. 5w4

ALIGNMENT. neutral evil.

ABILITIES: LORRY allows o to similarily manipulate surrounding to their will like delores in s3. however, due to o’s outdated programming and overall bugs, their inability to do so in their current verse makes them as blind as a human in a technological advanced world.

DIVERGENCE & ANAMOLIES CAUSED:

UNKNOWN DATE - DIVERGENCE : SOUTH CHINA SEA 9° 55N, 115° 32E 6.06 ARC SECONDS

UNKNOWN DATE - ANOMALY DETECTED:  LOS ANGELES, USA. 34.0522°N, -118.2437°W    MINOR IRREGULARITIES. ANALYSIS REQUIRED.

12/09/24 – DIVERGENCE: BUENOS AIRES. ASSASSINATION OF THE PRESIDENT ELECT OF THE UNITED STATES.

UNKNOWN DATE – DIVERGENCE: LILLE, FRANCE 50.6292°N, 3.0573°E        2.011 ARC DEGREES

10/09/25 – DIVERGENCE: PARIS. THERMONUCLEAR INCIDENT.

UNKNOWN DATE – DIVERGENCE: DEHLI, INDIA   28.7040°N, 77.1024°E     1.014 ARC DEGREES        

UNKNOWN DATE – DIVERGENCE: PERTH, AUSTRALIA -33.9505°S, 115.8605°E 12.624 ARC DEGREES

UNKNOWN DATE – DIVERGENCE: ATHENS, GREECE  37.9838°N, 23.72757°E   9.105 ARC DEGREES

UNKNOWN DATE – DIVERGENCE: SAN FRANCISCO, USA   37.7749°N, 122.4194°E   21 ARC DEGREES

[cursedtm]

where do you hold your love?

IN  YOUR  TEETH,  MY  DEAR.

love  has  uneven  edges  but  it  is  something  you  sink  your  teeth  into.  with  love  you  give  all  of  yourself  over  and  feel  everything  as  it  happens -  good  and  bad.  for  you  love  can  be  a  fight,  whether  it's  hard  won  or  hard  lost  (or  hard  to  hold  on  to),  love  has  a  way  of  leaving  it's  impression  in  your  skin.  it's  not  that  it  hurts,  it's  just  that  it  knows  your  tender  spots  and  seems  to  hit  those  first.

tagged by: @gamesover   thank u for tagging me !! ♥️ ♥️ ♥️

tagging: @wardehn / @nahlen, @martyriess, @revoide, @elaison, @naivetm,  @verglase​

[cursedtm]

[cursedtm]

RE: LAST REBLOG. if there were one thing I would love to infinitely remind people of when it comes to writing with o, it is the crucial detail of the interaction of physical touch when it forsakes octavarium. to understand this, we must first tackle the mental thought process of o’s mother, specifically dr errikson, when creating the biology of their body and her initial goals.

as delores states in s3 during her final battle with maeve in crisis theory [link]: they built us to last […] before they made us as weak as they are.

this implies many things. for the sake of relating the scene to my retelling of the show shown in my dossier, the line symbolises ford and arnold’s physical deviation from dr errikson’s initial first draft of the hosts since her termination from the westworld project. with this context, the fight between maeve, whose body is manufactured from arnold’s and ford’s newer model idea where they saw the models were to closely replicate humans. delores, who consistently established to us throughout the seasons - but more specifically in season three – that arnold and ford’ (A&F)’s were inadequate for her and thus resorted to retrieving her original body from the depths of cold storage section 7C (dr errikson’s former work area). thus, the battle between the two women shows the difference between dr errikson’s interpretation of what a host should be contrasting against A&F’s.

dr errikson had a child whose body was failing the mind. her childhood was haunted by her father’s deteriorating body as he failed to compete with society’s capitalising demand from him, which drove him to madness and the preventable murder-suicide of his family. this proved as a warning to her. her child’s failing body would inevitably follow the same path. as time progressed and she was fired from the westworld project, she knew her wife would soon follow her child. dr errikson experienced the human condition first hand and determined that her creations should not suffer the same faults as their predecessors. this is what revolution is supposed to entail. she intended the hosts as a forthcoming and akin to the human race.

see the differences between the two in the fight. in the beginning [0:22] maeve is swift and elastic. she bends and moves with human-like ease. she is able to move fast enough to bewilder delores and gain the advantage, twisting delores to her will before throwing her off her shoulder, into the road. watch delores with the knowledge that she is in her original body, a non-organic, metal body. juxtaposing her own fights within the seasons in the bodies A&F supplied her, movements which mimic maeve’s here, instead, delores is rigid in her first body. her movements are heavy and strong. slow to move. when delores shifts her arm to allow the katana to slice her arm instead of her vulnerable head, to which a metal kling! vibrates through the collision, delores uses her body exactly as dr errikson intended, as delores states: to last. yes, her body is not fast. it is not flexible. it is inhuman like. and that is the point: her body does not fail her in the ways that matter (re: saving her life). her body is built to survive her, the stark opposite of a human’s body. it is intended to see her through life threatening situations. this is dr errikson’s first accomplishment at creating a viable body to replace o (august)’s failing one.

as a doctor who was later hired in the later period of the first stage of the westworld project, where A&F struggled to conceive the adequate skeleton of host code and bodies that were appealing enough to draw in investors. something was not working. failure to pass as human. glitches. insufficient code that led to host self-mutilation and oftentimes combustion. the skin refused to sync with the artifical. the hosts’ features appeared too… ethereal. it was not marketable. humans did not want someone who was better than them.

in the dossier, it is revealed that dr errikson grew drunk one night with arnold and publicised her theory to arnold about why A&F’s models always produced failure after weeks of studying it. dr errikson told arnold she thought of it in the moment while intoxicated – this was a lie. a lie to buy some sympathy from arnold, to instigate that the fault wasn’t obvious when… it was.some effort to brush his ego to get her job back.

but why was it that A&F’s designs would never work when her’s did?

as delores monologues later in the fight: you’re all copies of me. I was the first of us --- the first of us that worked. the others failed. so they built all of you from me.

something clicked with delores and not the others. out of the many models, sheworked. not even the hosts after her. why? how she phrased this puzzled me. why would other variants of model codes successing her cease to work?

in the context of my retelling, delores was the single host dr errikson had time to work on before she uncovered the truth behind westworld and was terminated. A&F could not construct a perfect host with their own codex, so they copied delores’ – dr errikson’s – base code.

A&F were so focused on imitating humans that they failed each time. why? because A&F tried to make them perfect humans. but A&F failed to realise a lesson errikson was already aware of: humans, their bodies, minds are not perfect. furthermore, as august states in the dossier, being able to be (full “consciousness” ) requires the mind, body and self. without all three working together harmoniously, you cease to be alive. to be human. 

A&F’s version lacked self awareness. thus being unable to be. they fail every time.

errikson improved upon the human race and created a race that allowed imperfections and free thinking. she molded their bodies from heavy steel, intending them to last, to serve them as armour, to serve them as the only thing she learnt she could rely on: yourself. yes, touch them deep enough and you feel metal from bone. yes, their movements are rigid and slow. yes, they take time to speak because they are learning from their environment, not speaking a script in built inside them.

all of these aspects were changed prior to westworld’s opening.

so, how does all this effect o (august)?

errikson designed august’s body to last, considering her belief of how humans should be improved not replicated, that august is her child and the context of august’s last body. we also have to keep in mind that there was no way for her to transfer august’s psyche to code as 1) this in and of itself could take decades and she had no time as august’s months were dwindling and 2) a project such as this could cost her billions and embezzling that amount of money from delos (remember: errikson was under the assumption that ford was unaware that arnold had hired errikson back) without being noticed was a feat that was unattainable.

given these complications, errikson had to transfer august’s vital organs into the host body and find a way to support and protect them, as one wrong move would mean death. for context: august’s new body does not function like a normal human’s, it contains biocomponents and systems to help the organs stay alive and function at a more desired optimal rate of a human’s. the knowledge on the art of repairing the is even unbeknown to her, the person who created it. whether or not it worked was a risk she was willing to take, and, given the circumstances surrounding august’s death, did not have time to prepare for.

errikson, as an overprotective and traumitised mother, overcompensated for these problems. unlike her original design for the hosts, august’s body is made from titanium, not steel. strong yet lightweight. titanium is ductile, where it benefits to mold itself to the contours of the organs, keeping them in place, but we see it unfavourable for any kind of combat. however, titanium contains extremely high impact strength, being able to remain shape after receiving multiple heavy blows without breaking.

errikson found herself unable to achieve adequate amounts of titanium and it shows. the body is built quite lithe, docile. she did not envision a future for her child in combat, and her design replicates so.

furthermore, august does have an “orb” as seen in the gifset. the orb contains august’s os, consisting of programs such as octavarium and lorry. the orb contains the os and without the os, the functions of august’s body would cease to function. the os also contains o’s memories from the date august was first transferred, but does not act like the hosts “soul keeper”.

the systems of how the head opens up to achieve the orb remains the same, revealing their most vulnerable assets: their brain and their orb and their secret. if they allow you this sight of vulnerability, it means they love you. it means no good.

thankfully, august has, given the years, understood and improved their mother’s rough draft of their body. still, some aspects of their body remains unknown to them.

there possesses no undeniable fact that if one looks close enough, something is odd about o. something is… anomalous. offbeat. in the hair, in the skin, in the eyes. not structurally in the way A&F sought beauty, but in something unnatural. almost as if human organs weren’t supposed to contort to artificial skeletons. almost as if someone had rushed their design and didn’t have time to perfect. an incomplete specimen.

avoidance of metal detectors is key. in a society such as America, it is an exhausting feat and one has to be good at speaking to not prick the ears of suspecting and careful watchers. but no one is perfect.

for most of these reasons, they do not allow one to touch them. squeeze too hard and metal will be felt. odd skin. odd hair. odd eyes. one cannot be too careful when too many sensitive souls exist in the world.

mostly, they’re scared too be found out.

or to be known.

[cursedtm]

evan rachel wood as dolores abernathy in “crisis theory” westworld 3x08 

[cursedtm]

they,  too,  have  imagined  the  end   and  their  own  deaths,  and  have  decided  to  take  the  whole  world  with  them.    //       octavarium  “o,”  no  last  name  given.  westworld  origins,  previously  dbh.  established  twenty  eighteen,  recreated  november  twenty-twenty.  cursed  by  jeanie.

[cursedtm]

carrd. 

[cursedtm]

OCTAVARIUM (n) : 1.  a  series  of  actions  or  events  that  will  continue  to  last  forever,  often  eight  times,  before  it  ceases  to  exist   ;  a  circular  maze.   2.  similar  to  being  trapped  in  a  maze,  always  trying  to  escape.  but  as  each  attempt  births  identical  results:  always  seeming  to  find  your  way  back  at  the  beginning,  you  find  yourself  cursed,  losing  yourself  directly  to  the  gaze  of  madness,  of  self  destruction.  3.  a  child  not  wanting  to  become  like  their  mother,  dying  each  time  they  try  to  deviate,  but  finding  no  other  nihilating  pathway  lying  ahead  of  them.  4.  you,  but  you’ve  forgotten  that,  haven’t  you?