cyberbratzfairy - Tumblr blog

[cyberbratzfairy]

It is a SIN not to enjoy your life. I’m going to keep telling you this: Every time you make yourself small you are setting yourself up to be punished !!!

[cyberbratzfairy]

Things my therapist said that changed my brain chemistry

1 . Did you tell them? Then how would they know?

2. How many choices were available to you?

3. If it worked out, would you be this worked up? So is your problem the decision you made or how it turned out? Then, you're trying to control a future you can't see?

4. So they have to act a certain way to be in a relationship with you? And you decide what way that is. Ah, so like, a puppet master

5. Was it the goal? Then what's the problem?

6. Do you really want it or do you think you're supposed to?

7. If your daughter did that would this be your reaction?

8. So you're punishing yourself for surviving the only way you could?

9. You are mad you couldn't control their reaction?

10. What did you expect would be the consequence of that action?

11. Sounds to me like you're judging the actions of a teenager with the wisdom of an adult. How is that fair?

12. You were a child

13. You did the best with what you had. There was no other option.

14. You're autistic. This is what it means to be autistic. This is normal neurodivergent behavior.

15. You're literally 24. No 24 year old has that much figured out.

16. It's your phone. You're not it's human.

17. And this matters to you, because.

18. So you're a person with a personality disorder exhibiting symptoms of a personality disorder? Oh.

19. Are you looking for solutions or escaping action in a healthy way. Isn't this just glorified procrastination.

20. How much more could you have done with what you have.

21. Thats basic human behavior.

[cyberbratzfairy]

how to validate yourself without needing others

mastering self-respect, detachment and security

lack of discipline makes you ugly

saving your brain from over stimulation

how to self- learn things

signs you are self regulating through future fantasies

[cyberbratzfairy]

Favorite interviews for self improvement?

It would be too long to list all but here are some that I enjoyed in 2023..

Daily Habits to Take Back Control of Your Focus

Oprah and Author Brooks Build the Life You Want

Reinvent Yourself in 2024: 5 Steps to Have the Best Year of Your Life

Cultivating Unconditional Self Worth

Victoria Beckham at Parsons School of Design

Heal Chaos and Overwhelm: Declutter Every Part of Your Life

The Secret Formula that Launches Billion Dollar Companies feat Emma Grede (would never support skims but I really like her)

How to Build Awesome Habits: James Clear

Oprah: Tracee Ellis Ross (LOVE this interview, she drops so many gems about embracing your solitude)

[cyberbratzfairy]

You know what I love? Discipline. Do you know what I admire? People who handle their lives properly. Because I know that takes a lot. Did you get that high paying job and didn't buy an expensive car with your first paycheck? That shit is hard. Do you want to have s** but abstain yourself and don't just sleep with anyone? That shit is hard. Did you stay in shape during the holidays? That shit is hard. I love people being disciplined, handling their finances wisely, controlling themselves and discerning what is actually good for them. You can get offended or you can get better. Your choice. 🖤

[cyberbratzfairy]

what influencers and cosmetic companies won't tell you, is that the best anti-aging and beauty regimen is a healthy, low-stress lifestyle. Regular exercise, hydration, whole foods, low sugar, a spiritual practice, minimal alcohol, no smoking, healthy relationships, gratitude, etc.

you could have expensive eye cream, costly cosmetic procedures, or high-end makeup products, but none of that matters if you're not healthy physically, mentally, and emotionally. If you stay in a toxic relationship for years, it will age you. If eat junk, drink, and smoke, it will age you. if you live a sedentary lifestyle, it will age you!!

skincare products are fun to use, and they can definitely take your skin to the next level (especially if you have conditions like acne or hyperpigmentation), but I always notice that my skin is the best when I've been drinking lots of water, limiting my sugar, getting sunlight, and staying stress-free. looking forever 21 y/o shouldn't necessarily be the goal, but aging gracefully is a byproduct of taking care of yourself.

TL;DR- stop spending copious amount of $$$ on beauty treatments, procedures, and makeup and just take care of the body and mind that you have. it will be far more effective (and cheaper) in the long run.

[cyberbratzfairy]

“You don’t know anyone at the party, so you don’t want to go. You don’t like cottage cheese, so you haven’t eaten it in years. This is your choice, of course, but don’t kid yourself: it’s also the flinch. Your personality is not set in stone. You may think a morning coffee is the most enjoyable thing in the world, but it’s really just a habit. Thirty days without it, and you would be fine. You think you have a soul mate, but in fact you could have had any number of spouses. You would have evolved differently, but been just as happy. You can change what you want about yourself at any time. You see yourself as someone who can’t write or play an instrument, who gives in to temptation or makes bad decisions, but that’s really not you. It’s not ingrained. It’s not your personality. Your personality is something else, something deeper than just preferences, and these details on the surface, you can change anytime you like. If it is useful to do so, you must abandon your identity and start again. Sometimes, it’s the only way.”

— Julien Smith, The Flinch (via wnq-anonymous)

[cyberbratzfairy]

Ladies selfish women achieve their dreams and compassionate & humble women are taken advantage of, guilted to be smaller, chewed up, spit out and thrown out like an old pair of shoes.

[cyberbratzfairy]

2023 wrap up

Make a list of things that describe you. Use binary terms. Yes or no’s. Don’t try to soften the blow, just be honest. For example: I wake up at 10am. I work out once a month. I always get to work on time. I do my skincare routine typically 5 out of 7 times a week. I always get A’s and B’s. Etc etc

Mark which of those items are things you are proud of and want to continue and which you want to change.

Make a list of the things you want to describe you. For example: I want to wake up at 7am. I want to exercise daily. I want to eat clean at least 2 out of 3 meals a day. I want to speak fluent Spanish. Etc etc

Make detailed notes on how you can quit the things you want to quit and acquire the things you want to acquire.

Do it.

[cyberbratzfairy]

do you have any tips on how to figure that out? I really can't tell whether i wanna work when i get married or not, frankly i see the appeal in both being a housewife but also a career woman, but obviously i can't have it all and i'm not sure what to pursue :/

what kind of life do you want for yourself? what will truly make you happy? what will it take for you to wake up every day and feel like saying I love my life and I'm so happy to be me, I'm so happy I made the choices I did. on the good days, the bad days, the stressful days, and the hard days, which will make you feel like you still made the right choice? life is hard no matter which path you take. pick the hard that makes you still enjoy your life. what about being a housewife is appealing to you and what about being a working woman is appealing to you? are you looking at these options from a scarcity mindset and a place of fear? think it through. if all else fails, find a guy with enough money for you to be a housewife if you choose to be, but is also okay with a working wife if you change your mind 😁

everyone is different but for me it was a no-brainer. I love being in the comfort of my own home, I love making my own schedule and being able to dictate my day. I love being able to do what I want, when I want and be the boss of my housework, not anyone else. I love having the freedom and flexibility to go anywhere on a moments notice, sleep in, stay up, 'work' in my pajamas or a dress or nothing at all if I wanna get down like that! I get plenty of time to exercise, get cute, cook, clean, relax, shop, and just be me. no one to tell me when I can and can't eat or use the restroom, no one to tell me when my break is over, no one to tell me that I can't listen to music all day if I want to. no one can fire me, I don't have somebodies deadlines looming over me, I make my day what I want it to be. when my husband comes home he'll be coming home to someone who isn't also stressed from work and that makes his day better. when I have kids, I can give them all the attention and care they need from me and I look forward to having all the time in the world to spend with them every day.

for me this is a dream but for some that sounds like a boring monotonous nightmare where they are trapped at home while everyone else gets to be free outside. not everyone likes being at home. not everyone likes domestic work. not everyone feels comfortable with their husband being the provider bc it may scare them due to the possibility of things going awry (note: vet your men. and when you're done, vet them again. harder.) everyone is different and there is no right answer en masse. ignore what the world expects of you. what do YOU want for your life?

[cyberbratzfairy]

Elle Woods study motivation bc we all need it

[cyberbratzfairy]

im thinking about them (honey bear bottles)

[cyberbratzfairy]

How do you know what you should do

You pay very close attention your body because it doesn’t know how to lie to you, and pay very little attention to your mind because it is lying to you all the time

[cyberbratzfairy]

essential part of glowing up?

You have to do plenty of research and reading.

One of my favourite TV performances of all time is Vanessa Kirby’s portrayal of Princess Margaret. In my eyes, she was perfect and her performance was next level, her voice was husky when it needed to be, her eyes were smoky and smouldered, and she was passionate. She was confident, she was effortlessly cool, she was heartbroken when she needed to be, she knew how to fight, and she was why I kept watching The Crown. Vanessa Kirby’s portrayal of Princess Margaret was tragic and rebellious and I absolutely loved it but it was only good because Vanessa worked her ass off to learn more about Margaret, she read and researched, she talked to people who knew PM and learned her lines, and she created a character who was legitimately similar to young Margaret. You must be totally willing to work hard and do plenty of research if you want to succeed and win and you have to be ready to work your ass off without complaint if you want to get ahead and actually have a chance at the life you want. You have to work very hard to become good and you have to work even harder if you want to be a great.

And you have to be ready to back your research up.

[cyberbratzfairy]

they hated her for her effortless swag and determination to live life in all its vibrant colors despite despite despite

[cyberbratzfairy]

Allow yourself to shine without the desire to be seen.