cybrstone

[cybrstone]

clueless.

pairing — juyeon x reader (ft. crush!hyunjae) genre — friends to lovers, college au, angst (if u squint), fluff w.c — 4.3k (sorry) warnings — a bit suggestive, reader being head over heels for hyunjae, tiny makeout scene. not proofread!!!! playlist — heh border — @bernardsbendystraws note — oh lawddd ive been procrastinating this fic.. i started it in november.... ITS LITERALLY 2025 NOW BUT ANYWAY!

precis — falling for the popular guy wasn't part of your plan. your best friend, Juyeon, has seen you freak out over him more times than you can count. you tell each other everything, right? not everything, you dont know how much juyeon likes you, youre.. clueless.

── .✦

your day started off pretty normally. you groaned as you turn off your alarm, glancing at your roommates side of the room, which seemed to still be empty despite it being morning. minnie, your roommate, loves parties and you will never see her miss one. unfortunately (or fortunately for minnie) there was a party last night.. at hyunjaes. 

the man of your dreams. or so you believe. you seemingly have taken a liking to this boy, just like every other girl at your university. thats the catch, isnt it? falling for a popular guy who hooks up with nearly every girl he meets. you dont doubt minnie is one of those girls. still, part of you secretly wishes you were one of them too.

you rub your eyes and stretch, trying to shake off the fatigue taking over you. you had stayed up late studying for an exam and as you glance at your desk, you shake your head, knowing youll be back there for a few hours soon. just as you get up, you hear a knock on your door. its strange— minnie usually just walks in. so who is it..?

you open the door to find a 5’11 guy standing in front of you— juyeon, your best friend since forever (senior year of high school). “hey.” he speaks up. “what’re u doing up so early? you dont have 8am classes.” you step aside, letting him in. 

“just felt like waking up early.” he snickers. “yeah sure, we both know you arent a morning person.” you both sit on your bed, getting comfortable even though you should be getting ready. “what are you really here for?” “i just wanted to see you is all.” you rolls your eye playfully. “joking, of course. i just wanted to see if you went to hyunjaes party- oh im sorry, your mans party.” he smirks.

you give him a small, shy smile before tossing a pillow at him. “oh shut up.. and no, i didnt. i dont have time for that.” you reply. “that’s a shame. it was really fun you know.” he nudges your arm, wiggling his eyebrows. “that’s what u say every time hyunjae has a party.” he stands up, hands on his hips. “yeah whatever. cmon lets go get breakfast.” he turns around and extends his arm to give you a hand. “i haven’t even brushed my teeth yet.” “gross. go brush them and meet me outside.” you get off your bed and shove him playfully. “yeah yeah, get out.”

—

“where are we even going?” you ask, puting on your seatbelt and glancing over at him with curiosity. “younghoon and changmin said to meet them at dennys.” you chuckle. “dennys?” he adjusts his position, resting his right arm on the center console while his left stays on the wheel. “look, free food is free food.” he looks over at you, grinning. “but dennys really?” you meet his gaze, smiling softly. he loved the way you smiled. he cleared his throat, then looks back at the road. “yeah.” 

once the two of you finally pulled into the dennys parking lot, you were greeted by younghoon and changmin, who are waiting outside in the cold. “why aren’t you guys inside? you’re gonna get sick.” you shiver as you get out of the car, zipping your jacket back up. “we wanted to wait for you guys.” younghoon smiles,his teeth chatter. “younghoon it’s 18°.” you giggle softly as you all make your way inside.

“so, we all going to sunwoos party tonight?” the four of you make your way to a booth in the back. “another one? gosh, they never stop, do they?” you utter as you slide into the booth, juyeon following after. “never.” changmin smirks. “that’s the good thing about college.” he crosses his arms proudly. “more like annoying thing, min.” they all giggle at your remark “seriously, we’re juniors in college. partying, for me at least, stopped late freshman year.” you put the menu down and look at all of them. “well, for us, it’s never gonna stop.” juyeon slides his arm around your shoulders. “clearly.” you scoff. “let’s just order, i’m hungry.” 

after eating a delicious meal, the conversation drifts to random topics: high school, girls, boys, hyunjae. “i think you should shoot your shot, y/n.” younghoon says, sipping the last drops of orange juice in his cup. “never in a million years.” you reply, shaking your head. as you share more laughs, a group of girls stars to walking up to your table.

“hey, i was wondering if you’re single by any chance.” one of the girls steps closer to juyeon, a little too touchy. he looks at you, arm still around your shoulder. “im not.” he states certainly. you glance at him, confused. “what a shame, i wouldve treated you better.” the girls start to walk away, giggling, looking back at you disgusted as if youd done something wrong.  

“what the fuck just happened?” changmin stares after the girls as they walk away. “thanks by the way.” juyeon glances at you, softly. “sure.” you giggle as you drink your water. “let’s get outta here.” younghoon says as he gets up. “don’t forget to pay, changmin~” younghoon teases. changmin tilts his head back with groans. “i forgot i had to.” he walks to the counter, taking out his card to pay. “oh, right. we’re riding with you guys back to school.” “why?” juyeon plays with his keys. “we uber’d here.” “offff course you did.” 

“i call shotgun!” changmin shouts, getting closer to you guys. “no way, y/n’s always shotgun when i drive.” juyeon glances over at you as you leave the place. changmin pouts jokingly, giving juyeon a light pat on the shoulder. “you gotta tell her some day.” changmin murmurs before leaving right after you and younghoon out the door. juyeon sighs, knowing he was right, but there’s never a right time. 

juyeon rushes to the car due the shouting of you younghoon and changmin telling him to hurry up. “it’s too early for your shouting.” he mutters, unlocking the car. “it’s 10am.” you reply. “exactly.” he retorts, earning a smile from you as you climb into the car. “aux please!” changmin requests. “its literally a 5 minute drive back to school. you’re not even gonna be able to play one song.” juyeon glances at him through the rear view mirror, noticing changmin slight pout. 

juyeon sighs, passing the aux cord back to changmin. as changmin plays his songs, juyeon can’t help but smile at you. when he’s with you, no one else matters— no one else is there as a matter of fact. 

but you didn’t know that, did you?

as you arrive to school, your phone suddenly starts buzzing. you get out of the car, checking to see whos texting you. a sigh escapes your lips when seeing pictures of minnie and hyunjae at the party last night. main reason why your phone is buzzing is because guys are asking you for minnie’s number. you rolls your eyes and slam the car door, a little too hard. “jesus careful now. what happened?” the three boys turned to face you. “minnie and hyunjae hooked up. can’t say im surprised.”

it’s nothing new to see hyunjae with another girl. the three boys glance at each other, mainly at juyeon. “whatever, i gotta go to the library. i’m tired of my desk. i’ll see you guys around” you walk towards your dorm building. silently hoping minnie wasn’t home yet. 

but of course not everything can go your way.

“hey!” you’re greeted with your painfully obvious, hungover roommate. “hey minnie.” you quickly grab your books and head to the door. “wait!” minnie stops you in your tracks. “i know you have a big crush on hyunjae— it’s really obvious by the way—  but im sure you saw the pictures and i just wanted to let you know that he’s a top tier kisser and so so good in bed.” her words made you cringe. 

“ookay minnie.-“ “like im talking s tier” “i get it minnie.” “sorry.” you walk out of your dorm, standing outside for a moment, wondering why. why him? out of your entire school— him? you shake your head, walking out the building. you had way more important things to worry about then worry about some gorgeous man. 

and speaking of, there he is.. talking with your best friend. “oh y/n!” juyeon calls you over. ‘oh fuck me.’ you thought. you wanted to ignore him, but you cant. not now atleast, you can’t afford to make a bad first impression now can you?

you quietly make you way over to them. wishing this whole thing was a dream and that you’ll wake up soon. but you dont. “hyunjae, this is my best friend, y/n.” he looks at you and greets you with a smile. “hi y/n.” oh that smile— that beautiful smile that you liked so much. youre so caught up in admiring him that you almost forgot to say hello back. “hi.” you bit the inside of your cheek, its just too awkward.

while you admired hyunjae, juyeon admired you, feeling nothing but envy toward hyunjae. “you goin’ to sunwoos party tonight?” he smirks at you, licking his lips. “uh, i gotta study.” you stammer, avoiding his gaze. focusing on everything but him.

“come on~ just this once.. for me..?” he pleads. he knew what he was doing. you look into his eyes, seeing everything that can go wrong. “alright.” juyeon looked at you, surprised. just a moment ago, you said you’d stop going to parties— but of course, since the hyunjae asked you personally, you have to go. he smiles, his gaze locking with yours, as if he’s getting lost in it. “great. i’ll see you tonight then.” he says softly, turning back to juyeon. “i have to go, coach wanted me for something, see ya’” you watch as hyunjae leaves, he turns to you giving u a simple nod. 

“oh so now you wanna go.” juyeon turns to you shaking his head. “i dont know why i said yes. please kill me.” he chuckles. “better hurry up and go study, because we’re leaving at 10.” you throw your head back, groaning. juyeon, finding this amusing, laughs as he throws his arm around your shoulders, because to him, it just felt right. 

he ends up walking to you to the library and staying with you. even though he spent most of the time on his phone, you liked the company. 

— 

“wait juyo, what am i even gonna wear..?” you whisper packing up your laptop and books. “just borrow something of minnie’s.” he scoffs with a laugh. “not a bad idea actually.” you tap your chin thoughtfully. “lets go check if she’s home.” the two of you rushed to your dorm. for once hoping she’s there. 

“minnie!” you call out, slightly out of breath. she jumps from the sudden shout. her focus broken as she was sitting at her desk, getting ready for the exact same party you are going to. “what’s up? you scared me.” juyeon stays at the door, just in case you wanted him to step out. “can i borrow uhm.. your clothes for the party.” her expression shifts completely. she smiled brightly. “oh i’ve been waiting for this day to come!” she stands up and opens her closet. “take anything you’d like. fuck it, you can even take the outfit im gonna wear.” you laugh softly at her eagerness before rummaging through her closet, though, everything was so.. not.. you. 

“you can go get ready, juyeon. i’ll be here for a while. just.. come back when you’re done.” he nods, leaving the two of you to get ready. “awh, that was juyeon? he’s so cute. you should put me on with him.” she smirks. “ask him yourself, minnie.” you sneer, you never really liked when girls would ask you for his number or just to hook them up. you never knew why, you just.. did.

after trying on what felt like every piece of (party) clothes in minnies closet, you didnt seem to like them. “minnie, all of your clothes are revealing, it’s like 20 something degrees outside.” you huff, it’s been atleast 30 minutes trying to find an outfit. “beauty is pain or whatever they say.” she shrugs, lips pursed as she bites the inside of her cheek before speaking again. “just wear my outfit it’s the least revealing and warmer.” she grabs the clothes from her bed and hands them to you. “no minnie, i dont-“ “just take it. i want you to go to this party, so i want you to be comfortable.” you smile warmly, thankful for your crazy, yet sweet roommate despite what she does at partys. 

“thanks.” 

by the time you’re done with your makeup, you hear a knock on your door. minnie goes to the door and greets juyeon. he walks in and looks over at you, his lips being tugged up into a smirk. “wow goin’ all out now are we?” you turn to face him, rolling your eyes. “first party in a while, and hyunjae personally invited me, might as well. now get out, i need to change.” he raises his hands in a mock surrender, backing out of the room with a grin.

changing was obviously the easiest part, you stare into the mirror for a bit. it definitely wasnt your style but there’s nothing you can do now.

“you look good.” minnie mutters, hands on her hips. “do i really?” she moves to stand next to you. “of course.” you smile softly before finally letting in juyeon. 

safe to say juyeon was.. starstruck when he saw you. he never  imagined you in such clothes, yet here you were, in front of him wearing something very much out of your comfort zone. in that moment, he felt like he was falling in love with you all over again. “how do i look?” you asked, a playful glint in your eyes. “great.” he replied, his gaze lingering on you a moment longer than necessary. “now can we go?” he licks his lips, looking away. “wait!” you both look back into your dorm to see minnie waving a bottle of vodka, grinning. “come, take the first shot w me.” you walk back inside, hesitant but still obliged. “juyeon?” “wasn’t really planning on drinking.”

“cmon juyo~” hes hesitant, he looks over at you as you plead. he gives in the moment he looks at you, it was almost like you know how to make him crack. “for you, y/n.” you smile as you all take a shot, hissing from the taste. 

“ready to go?” minnie perked up, you would never not see her happy to go to a party, its second nature for her. minnie was actually the first one out the door. you and juyeon took your time getting there, not like there was any rush. the two of you walked beside each other, arms occasionally brushing. “excited for the party..?” juyeon breaks the comfortable silence as he scratches his neck. 

“scared actually.” he smiles, “you’ll be fine, just.. stay in my sight okay?”

you nod. 

-

the party was relatively tame. sunwoo kept coming up to you to have a good-ish conversation though ends up leaving every time to take shot after shot. “Hey, you’re y/n right?” a tall figure looming from the crowd walked towards you with a big grin. “uhh, yea i am, and you are?” the boy takes a sip of his (assumed) alcoholic beverage, “eric. I’ve heard a lot about you by the way.” you furrow your brows, curious. “what do you mean you’ve heard a lot about me?” you fixed your gaze on him intensely.  

“hyunjae and juyeon.” hyunjae? you smiled to yourself. he had been talking about you.. but who brought u up first..? 

“what do they—“ you were suddenly caught off by an arm sliding around your shoulder. “hey.” you look up to see the man of your dreams. your breathed hitched at the sight of him. 

“hyunjae! hey man i didnt think you would show up because of.. you know who.” eric comes closer to greet hyunjae with a handshake. you were too mesmerized by the fact hyunjae has his arms around you to notice anything. to you, it seemed like it was only you and hyunjae in the room. 

“i had to man, i invited someone after all.” he looks down at you with a soft smile. you look down as you smile. “cool outfit by the way.” he looks to you up and down, smirking as if he’s about to just flat out eat you. “oh thanks.” 

as you two continue talking, juyeon watches from a distance. tongue poking the inside of his cheek as he takes a sip of his drink. not caring about what changmins telling him.

changmins notices his absent mind and glances over to where his attention is fixed. “no wonder youre not paying attention to me.” juyeon finally snaps out of this thoughts and looks at him. “my bad, what were you saying?” changmins scoffs. “dude you gotta tell her, if not then let her be.” juyeon remains quiet as he shakes his head. 

as he went to go grab another drink, taking his eyes away from you for just a second, you were gone. he sighed hoping what he was thinking isnt whats happening. however….

you gulp as hyunjae takes your hand to lead you to a room. you can’t help but notice his phone going off every 5 minutes. though, that’s the least of your worries right now, the man you like oh so much is leading you to an isolated room. 

he shuts the door behind you and almost immediately pulls you into a deep kiss. you couldn’t believe it, he was kissing you. you subconsciously kiss him back, hands coming to rest on his cheeks. his resting on your waist. his lips were soft, delicate even. after some time, he begins to get touchy. you didnt mind though, this was like a dream come true for you. 

his hands tugging the hem of your tank top. while yours was tangled in his hair. the kiss was slow, almost like he wanted to savor this moment. 

you jumped at this cold touch underneath your shirt. he pulls away to catch his breath, but you can’t help yearning for more. his lips so close to yours. “you’re beautiful, y/n.” you look up at him, his gaze lustful, darkening with each second. which sent shivers down your spine. you let out a breathy sigh, licking your lips as they curl into a tender smile. 

“thank you.” you whisper, now avoiding his gaze. taking note of this, he gently brings one of his hands to your chin, making you face him.

a mischievous smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. his hand coming to hold the back of your head to kiss you one more time until..

ding 

ding 

he pulls away. your lips parted, eyes fluttering. aching for another kiss that wont come. 

he texts back whoever was calling and texting him, with a smirk on his face. you waited there patiently, nervous to speak up. “sorry, y/n.” his tone now dismissive, like if what just happened was forgotten. 

“see you later yeah?” he leaves the room, phone pressed to his ear. you stand there, while the warmth of his touch still linger on your skin. your expression still dazed. you slowly leave the room to find juyeon. 

as you head down stairs, you were immediately grabbed by the arm and got tugged outside. “what the fuck happened?! i took my eyes off of you for a second!” you flashed a coy smile at him, his brows furrowed. he noticed your shirt slightly messed up and sighed. “did you two hook up?” you shake your head, giving him a silent no. 

he sighed in relief. “just kissed.” you giggle, it was as if he turned you into a teenager in love. you didnt know that this hurt juyeon, you were completely clueless. all juyeon could do is sit back and watch. 

right? 

he clears his throat. “lets head back, yeah?” his arm slips around her shoulder, pulling you close, as if he’s afraid you’ll slip away from him. “juyo..” he hums in response, glancing down at you. “who’s ‘miyeon’?” he remained quiet for a moment. wondering if he should tell you or not. “miyeon..?” “yeah, i saw her name pop up on hyunjaes phone— not that i wanted to i just accidentally saw..!” he shook his head. he didnt want to hurt you, but if you wanted to know..

“hyunjaes ex.” 

“wh..what?”

“y/n, the only reason why he’s hooking up with so many girls..” he gulps, looking into your innocent eyes. “is because.. he’s trying to make miyeon take him back by making her jealous. its a pretty loser plan i mean..” he laughs awkwardly. “a high schooler would do that, not a.. college.. stu... y/n?” 

your gaze turned glassy as tears gathered in your eyes. “y/n..” he cups your face trying to wipe away every tears that falls from your face. “so.. i never stood a chance..?” your voice quivered. “nonono— its not that.. y/n..” 

“juyo..” you cry, clinging to him as your shoulders shake with your cries. he hugged you back gently, patting the back of your head. he bit his tongue, wishing he never told you. though, he knew it would come out eventually.

“come on, lets go.” he speaks softly, almost in a whisper. keeping you close as you two walk to your dorm.

the walk there was silent. not that you minded it, it was comfortable. you can’t help looking up at your best friend. it was warm in his arms. would it be crazy for you to feel something right now?

—

“can you.. stay with me..?” you pause, pushing the door to your dorm open just a crack. your voice still shaky.

the silence that follows feels loud.

“of course. i won’t leave you.” your lips curled upward into a smile, sniffling as you walk in.

the room was empty with minnie still at the party. you dont even bother changing, you just slowly get into bed, leaving a space for juyeon.

there was more silence as he climbs into bed.

its not something new that you and juyeon are in bed together. after so many hangouts at your house, it feels completely normal. without a word, he slips his phone from his pocket and starts scrolling through his feed, you doing the same.

eventually, the comfortable silence settles between you two. you start to drift off to fall asleep. juyeon notices, smiling softly. he gently shifts, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you close in a gentle embrace.

as you sleep deeply, you instinctively cuddle him closer, holding him tight. he kisses your forehead, whispering a soft “goodnight.” before drifting off to sleep as well.

you both peacefully sleep, no disruptions what so ever for a few hours until..

“y/n! y/n!” changmin bursts through your door, eyes widening at the sight of you two. he quickly slaps his hand over his mouth. juyeon stirs awake, blinking in confusion “what do you want, changmin?” he pauses. “y/n’s sleeping, be quiet.” juyeon mumbles groggily, rubbing his eyes, still holding you tightly.

“i was just coming in to tell y/n i just hooked up with minnie..” changmin whispers, juyeon lets out a soft, amused huff of laughter. “but i see shes busy..” he teases.

“get out, changmin.”

“yes sir!”

—

as you wake up, a familiar, comforting scent fills the air. you blink your eyes open to find juyeon sleeping peacefully beside you. a soft smile tugs at your lips as you watch him, taking in the peaceful sight for as long as you can before he wakes up.

you gently bring your hand up to move his hair out of his face. he groans at the sudden touch, though doesn’t wake up.

“GOOD MORNING!” minnie bursts through the door causing the two of you to bolt up. juyeon rubs his eyes and groans. “minnie..?” he turns to his left and there you were, holding your hand over your heart feeling it beat fast at the scare minnie gave you.

his arm was somehow around your waist. though, you both didn’t notice.

“hello lovebirds!” she flops down on her bed.

“where were you all night?” you speak up, rubbing your eyes. she quickly bolts up at the question, with a small smirk on her face.

“you will never guess!—“

“changmins.”

the two girls turned to juyeon. “what?!” you exclaimed, quickly getting up. “minnie, you hooked up with my bestfriend!?” you shake her by the shoulders. not stopping you, she just giggles.

“yeah… he’s so..”

“sure..”

“well what about you two, huh?” she points at you and juyeon, the smirk quickly returning to her face. “we didn’t do anything!” she giggles as you playfully hit her.

“when will the time come..” she turns around and flops onto her bed once more. you glance over at juyeon, noticing his ears are red. you look away as a smile forms on your face.

juyeon clears his throat. “i’m gonna go.. see you later?” he throws the blankets off of him and gets off the bed. “yeah.. see you.” you watch him as he leaves your dorm.

“i knew it!” minnies says as she lays on her pillow, voice muffled. you look at her confused as she sits up. “girl, go to sleep.”

“juyeon likes you!”

“what? you’re crazy.”

“slept over, ears got red when i mentioned you two…” she goes on. “he totally likes you. oh it must suck to like you..”

you furrow your brows. “what? why?”

“you’re head over heels for hyunjae, babes.”

“okay well not anymore, not after juyo told me he trying to get back with his ex” you sit on the edge of her bed.

“oh what an asshole..”

“yea well, nothing i can do now he loves her. i will never be anything to him besides ‘juyeons friend’. ”

yunppeo talks! — this is a long one and im still gonna make a part two dwdw you guys will definitely get ur juyeon fluff

p.s — im working on istj too ^v^

love, yunppeo.

[cybrstone]

just read ur about me and i love breast faiyaz sm AND TYLER

i LOOOOOOVE brent faiyaz so much omg my fav song is pistachios

[cybrstone]

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[cybrstone]

two slow dancers (s.mg)

⊹ ࣪mingi x f!reader

⊹ college au

⊹ genre: angst? fluff? unresolved feelings and pettiness is very present

⊹ warnings: cursing, parties, drinking, everyone is kind of stupid

⊹ a/n: can anyone tell i'm not in college and have never been to a party... also yes the title is a mitski reference but the fic itself is nowhere near as devastating as the song :) likes are appreciated

the walk back to your apartment feels longer today. maybe because it’s starting to get colder, or maybe it’s because you feel like you’re going in circles with the career path you chose. dropping out of college because of the toll the workload was taking on you might’ve been the worst decision of your life, if you didn’t apply for an office job directly after.

well… whatever pays the rent, right? at least you’re splitting the cost with wooyoung, the strange boy you grew close with junior year of high school. at least he cooks, so you don’t have to worry about food costs until he goes out partying and is begging for takeout when he gets back at three in the morning.

when you make your way up to the second floor of the apartment complex, unlocking your door, you don’t expect to see san - also a friend from high school - lounging on yours and wooyoung’s couch. you look around before turning around to lock the door. “hi san,” you greet, taking your shoes off. “where’s woo?” 

san gives a quick hi and a smile before responding. “he’s showering,” he says, looking back at his phone. “told me he’d be out quick, but it’s been 30 minutes. i think he drowned.” you chuckle, trailing to your room and shutting the door. you fall onto your bed, taking in the comfort it gives you for the first time in what feels like weeks.

it was last night. your peace and quiet is short lived, a loud knock on the door and you see the knob twist open. “you’re back!” wooyoung exclaims, going to lay next to you and wrap his arms around you.

you grumble in protest, but it takes more than that for him to uncurl himself from you. “so i saw on our calendar that you have this weekend off,” he starts, and you know this is not just a normal conversation, as much as you would love it to be. “yunho’s hosting a party tomorrow. san and i want you to come with.”

“does san know he’s going?” you ask sarcastically, and he smacks your arm lightly. “yes, he knows. he’s the one who asked me to invite you.” you hum, knowing that parties are not necessarily san’s type of fun either. “i’m not going, woo. i don’t know why you keep asking me to go with you when you’re gonna get shitfaced anyway and leave me alone.”

wooyoung groans, sitting up to look at you. “jesus, yn, what happened to you?” he asks with fake terror, and you can’t resist rolling your eyes. “you used to be so fun! do you not remember high school? you used to be crazy about parties, and now look at you. lonely and miserable.”

“i am not miserable-“ “you complain about your job every day you come back. you’re miserable.”

you look away, and you know wooyoung has won this debate. “even if i am, i’m not lonely. i have you and occasionally san and yeosang!” wooyoung deadpans, and he moves to sit criss-cross in front of you. “you know that’s not how i meant it,” he responds. “i’m just saying. you need to get out again. i know you’re not happy with yourself, and you forget that i know that.”

you sigh, laying on your back to look at the ceiling. “even if i did go with you guys, i’d probably get weird looks. that party is going to be full of people who go to the college i dropped out of,” you say, and you feel the bed shift. “i’m not gonna spoil the mood. plus, yunho probably doesn’t even remember me! i am not going to fight to get into a house party.”

“you’re not gonna have to argue your way in, yn,” you hear, and you turn your head to see san leaning against the doorway to your bedroom. “did it leave your head that me and wooyoung are friends with him? he won’t give a fuck who we bring.”

you groan, covering your face with your hands. “wooyoung’s right,” he continues, his voice getting closer. “just come with us. you’ll have fun, i promise. if you don’t, i’ll get you whatever dinner you want for a week straight.”

it takes you a while before you respond. maybe that’s the problem; you lost your personality with such a draining schedule. maybe letting loose once in a while is what you need. no, you just need to relax instead of going to parties. what are you thinking? why are you letting them talk you into this? what time should you be ready? what are you gonna wear?

you drop your hands to see the pair staring at you. “only if one of you gets me a drink before we leave,” you mutter, and you hear a whispered celebration between the two. “be ready by 8 tomorrow, okay? i’ll be back later. we’re going out.” you nod, waving bye to them and hearing the front door open and shut.

this is not your ideal way to relieve stress, but drinking will always help a little.

———

the morning and afternoon pass quicker than you would like it to. you weren’t very productive today, waking up and drinking coffee while processing what you had agreed to the night before. it was too late to go back on it now. wooyoung was too excited and yeosang had texted, surprised to hear that you’re “coming out of your dungeon.”

you cleaned around the house a little, taking a shot here and there to keep your nerves settled. now, it’s 5 pm, and you have exactly 3 hours to prepare yourself for something you would’ve gone to in a heartbeat 6 years ago.

wooyoung had gone out with san and a few other friends to help yunho with setting up, leaving you alone in the apartment. it doesn’t take you too long to get ready, fixing your hair and making yourself presentable within an hour and a half. what takes the longest time is figuring out what to wear.

you would’ve been late had wooyoung not come back early, perhaps sensing your conflict and choosing something in the back of your closet you had forgotten you owned. a tiny black dress that you could barely fit into when you were 18. you weren’t sure how it would look now.

as you walk out of the bathroom, wooyoung looks up from scrolling on his phone to stare. “what?” you say, uncomfortably shifting under his gaze. “does it look bad?” “looks bad my ass,” he says, dropping his phone. “jesus yn, i knew you grew up after high school, but not like this!”

“like what?”

“do you really need me to tell you? are you that oblivious?”

oh. that’s what he meant. “you’re gross.” “and you are wearing that out. hurry up and get your shit together, san’s here.”

wooyoung leaves no room to argue, practically dragging you out of the door and down the complex stairs to san’s car. you open the backseat door to see seonghwa and yeosang. they give you a greeting as you slide into the backseat, wooyoung taking his respective spot in the passenger’s seat.

“here,” san says to you, picking up a bottle from the cup holder and handing it to you. “you’ll probably need it, and i promised.” you take it while thanking him, sipping occasionally as you chat with the boys.

the drive isn’t terrible until seonghwa asks you a question. “yn, they told you that yunho is hosting, right?” you see wooyoung tense up at the question, but you choose not to comment on it. “yeah, why? that’s where hongjoong and jongho stay, right?”

“and mingi.”

oh. he had slipped your mind. mingi, yunho’s best friend. your best friend. at least, he had been, just before graduation. just before he got his first girlfriend, before he let her manipulate him into blocking you and cutting contact. into blocking everyone, keeping his attention solely on her. “yn,” yeosang shakes your shoulder, “you good?”

you blink, looking around. “yeah.” you turn your attention back to seonghwa, your voice now having a new tone to it. “i forgot about him,” you say, a fake smile on your face as you down the rest of the alcohol san got you. “wooyoung failed to remind me of that.”

“to be fair!” wooyoung blurts out, turning towards the backseat, “this is the first time you’ve agreed to come with us in forever! i wasn’t gonna remind you of that asshole when you finally agreed to go-“ “it would’ve been nice to tell her, woo. at least to prepare her,” seonghwa scolds gently.

“i’ll be fine,” you say, fixing the strap on your dress. “just more of a reason to drink. forget he even exists again, y’know? make him realize the feeling is mutual.”

———

the rest of the drive is slightly tense as you mentally ready yourself to see mingi’s stupid face again. to see that sweet, gorgeous smile on his face when he talks to his friends, to hear his laugh that’s louder than any music playing to you. to see what girl he has his arm around tonight.

the moment your group gets through the doors of the house, you take wooyoung and beeline to the drinks. you pour yourself a drink bigger than you usually would for your first of the night, chugging it. “you fucking owe me,” you yell to wooyoung over the music, who chugs his own drink.

“i’m sorry!” he says, looking out into the crowd. “i didn’t think you would care! you shouldn’t give a fuck about him, anyway. just have fun.”

and have fun you do.

you dance, you drink, you say hi to hongjoong and jongho and take yunho out to dance with you. strangely, you don't see mingi once. or maybe you're just too drunk to notice him. you spent all that time worrying about running into him, but maybe he's not even here!

"yn, come do shots with us!"

that gets your attention. you're already drunk, what's a few more? you stumble your way to the group, sliding past sweaty bodies. you see yunho and wooyoung, the latter offering you a glass. you see san in the corner of your eye watching, his eyebrows etched in concern. "yn," he says as you down the drink, "how much have you had to drink?"

you hum, thinking. "maybe, like.. four? i haven't been keeping count."

"six," the voice behind you says, and it causes your muscles to tense up. it's deep, smooth. it's mingi.

san shifts his gaze to him, his expression changing. "what?"

"she's had six." mingi repeats, and you don't dare turn around. you hear rustling behind you, probably his jacket, then see his arm hand a water bottle to san. "don't let her have more. that's her limit."

"thanks," san mutters, taking the water from him. "i know." he hands you the bottle after opening it, making sure you actually drink it. he glances behind you again, a scowl on his face. "you can go now."

"uh- yeah," mingi says, and you remember his habits well enough to know he's messing with whatever necklace he has on right now because of the awkward air. "i better go."

you come back to your senses as he walks away, gears shifting in your mind. he doesn't get to do that. you turn, following his footsteps despite san's protests. he doesn't get to act like he did nothing wrong. you stomp towards him as he goes to lean against a wall, grabbing his forearm and pulling him into an open room. "what-" he says, stopping himself when he notices the look on your face.

"you had no right to do that," you start, shutting the door and locking it. "you had no right to waltz over there and act like you still fucking know me because you don't!"

"yn, please-" "you haven't known me for the past four years of our lives because you threw me out for some girl you met a month before! you knew me your whole life! you don't get to act like we're still friends when you know damn well-" you stop yourself, the room starting to spin. you stumble, and mingi reaches out to keep you steady.

"can you sit down-" "don't touch me."

"okay, i'm sorry. sit down. you're gonna make yourself sick."

you roll your eyes, sitting on the rolling chair at the desk in whoever's room you're in. mingi sits opposite of you, elbows on his knees as he looks at you. "are you okay?"

"i'm fine. stop acting like you care." "i'm not acting, though."

"seriously?" you ask, in disbelief. "mingi, be real with yourself. i'm not going to be one of the girls that you hook up with after this. save yourself the trouble."

he laughs at this, making you furrow your eyebrows. "this is the first conversation we've had in years, and you think i'm trying to fuck you?"

"are you not?"

"god- no, yn, i'm not," he says, running a hand through his hair. "i'm sorry. i wasn't expecting to see you tonight because i haven't for however long it's been. and the drink thing- you can't expect me to not say something. if you have another, you're gonna vomit all over yourself just like you did junior year."

you cringe at the memory, but your heart clenches in your chest. you can tell from the look in his eyes that he's completely serious, but you're drunk, and you're petty. 

"so how are you and what's her face?"

"who are you-" he cuts himself off, realization in her face. "gyuri? we broke up, like, last year," he says, his eyebrows furrowing. "i wouldn't even be here at this party alone if i was with her."

he has a good point. she was that crazy to the point he couldn't go out alone. she's the sole reason you even stopped talking to him.  you decide right then and there that all of your problems are her fault.

"you still didn't talk to me after," you mumble, although you're just picking a fight for no reason now. 

"do you not think i tried?" he says, leaning forward, something about his voice compelling you to look at him. 

"the moment i broke things off, i texted you. it didn't go through. i asked about you, trust me, but in case you didn't notice your friends aren't too crazy about me either. san wouldn't tell me anything, and you know wooyoung won't even look my way," he explains, and you feel yourself sobering up with the information.

"i tried, yn, i did. i miss you more than anything. i know i fucked up. are you willing to talk to me again? be friends?"

you look away, biting your lip in thought. are you willing to do this again? to be friends with mingi again, to dedicate hours of your time to him, to ignore the way your heart clenches every time he mentions another girl he likes?

the universe doesn't want to give you time to think about it, someone banging on the locked door. "yn?" wooyoung calls out, your name slurring on his lips. "you okay? you're not dead, are you?"

you glance at mingi before yelling back to him. "i'm fine, woo!" you say to him through the door. "okay! just making sure! use protection!"

you mentally facepalm at his comment, hearing mingi chuckle. "he has no idea it's me with you, right?"

"not a clue."

going back to your thoughts, you decide to sleep on his question. "i'll text you, okay?" you say slowly to him, watching the light in his eyes return. he nods, a smile on his face. "okay."

you get up to exit the room, tugging your dress down, unlocking the door. "yn," mingi calls, and you look over your shoulder to look at him. "the dress looks good on you. it always has."

your face heats at his words, and you turn away to smile. "thank you, mingi," you say softly, turning the knob. "i'll see you later."

"see you around, pretty. don't leave me hanging too long."