d-e-bs-u-e

[d-e-bs-u-e]

I pray every book girl finds the type of love she reads about

[d-e-bs-u-e]

my mind needs to put this out there lmao but here goes:

since i've started writing again, my mind is busier now with all the ideas coming in. this means 2 things: one, it satiates my need to feel busy all the time even though i bedrot as a reward for surviving my semester. and two, i dream now.

tbh i like the idea that when you dream, you take a peek of yourself in another dimension (blame marvel ok)

so i had this dream. it felt as if i was in the regency (almost bridgerton timeline) or something like that. i remember being seated in a carriage alongside a few other people who i presume are family?? (they felt familiar to me) and we were to go somewhere. the ride felt long but everything blurred and i was now standing in a vast luncheon-ish picnic by a lake and i was chatting away with this man.

it didn't feel weird or nightmare-ish at all. it was pleasant having seen him and talking to him, almost romantic feeling, yk. he spoke english bcs as much as i don't understand what he's saying, i was replying in english too (felt like he's not the same ethnicity as i am too)

then stuff changed again and it's now a modern house like the one you see on pinterest when you look up "modern minimalist house" something like that lmao so anyways, i was at this house's gate. so i rang the doorbell and came out this house is the same guy from the first part of the dream (he's wearing modern clothing now)

he greets me and we enter the house to a party i thinkkkk and people were there (i, now, assume i was friends with too bcs i interacted with them) and the party seems to extend through the whole suburb block and the houses seem interconnected (?? idk it seemed that way in the dream) so it's like this whole block has houses and a convenience store in it.

i spent the whole time with this guy and it seems like i was dating this guy.

the dream changed again and i was in a restaurant with my family. it's like a reunion or gathering for something. everyone was loud and laughing and they looked like they were having a good time. but i stood up and excused myself from the event but i was stopped as i was about to head out. i even asked "where is ...?" referring to the guy i was dating in the dream. and some people there pointed to the minimalist modern house i was in.

i walked out and was immediately in a convenience store as i was standing in line holding stuff i don't even remember getting. i was with a friend (felt like a friend) and i asked again "where is ...?" and they said that he'd meet us here at the line by the register.

after a while, i waited there and then the guy came with stacks of money (??? idk guys but it looked like currency to me) he showed it the register and just left with the stuff we bought and me at tow. he held my hand and we were walking to our supposed house.

as we were walking, i turned to see him kneeling with whatever on his hand. i asked "what'd you mean you're proposing? that's hardly a ring." something like that. he laughed and said CLEARLY "so do you finally say yes?" and handed me a ring in an acrylic case

and i woke up. goddamn.

[d-e-bs-u-e]

minsan, kailangan din

[d-e-bs-u-e]

sapagkat, irog ko, ika'y mahal pa din ngunit sabi ng puso ko'y "tama na ang iyong pananakit sa akin. siya na ngayo'y iyong pakawalan. alam ko'ng ito'y makabagbag damdamin ngunit ako'y nanghihina na." nang malagpasanna ako'y bibitaw, ikaw pala'y nandyan sa likod ko't nakayakap kaya ako'y nagdurugo noong sabihin mo "kung ang aking pagmamahal ay di mo na maramdaman, alalahanin mo na ikamamatay ko ang di mo pagibig sa akin kahit pa itulak mo ako palayo, sayo at sayo ko ibibigay ang aking puso."

para kay basketbolero

[d-e-bs-u-e]

[d-e-bs-u-e]

madaling araw na pero miss pa din kita

Uy, miss na kita :(

[d-e-bs-u-e]

You're my "Usap muna tayo, sobrang miss na kita." in this world, "Tara tulog na. Antok na ko"

[d-e-bs-u-e]

[d-e-bs-u-e]

siya yung kabanata na kabisado ko na pero hinding hindi ko sinubukang ipabasa sa iba

You’re my favorite chapter.

[d-e-bs-u-e]

[d-e-bs-u-e]

just for once. I want to be someone loved no the one who is going to love. I want to be the one who’ll be fought for, not I’m the one the one fighting for them.

[d-e-bs-u-e]

[d-e-bs-u-e]

call me in the middle of the night and tell me you can’t sleep without me

(via getdiiirt-y)

[d-e-bs-u-e]

you're at the bottom. go up!